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every song by the national:https://twitter.com/hella_swears/status/1298934457613848576 …
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learning i have no interest in surviving an apocalypse. fashion my bones into a battle ax and use it to fend off bandits, just let me off that ride early
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muscle skoals Retweeted
Not sure who needs to hear this but having interests and hobbies and a type of way you feel and think and behave is not a personality
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if bob marley was on twitter he’d be like one (1) love, one (1) heart
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follow me for dumb posts. follow tim for critical analysis of dumb postshttps://twitter.com/postinmonkey/status/1277683989361258496 …
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muscle skoals Retweeted
imagining Jay Leno showing his penis to a woman and saying “have you seen this? have you heard about this?”
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have to admit these new biden scripts are a lot better on policypic.twitter.com/TzZWvxzmZo
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muscle skoals Retweeted
Taking a shit without looking at your phone counts as meditating now
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we are unclear how many pinocchios to assign to joe biden’s claim “i will not ban fraggle rock”
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previously unthinkable levels of “posting through it” https://twitter.com/thehermancain/status/1300211456126803968 …
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why is coconut water the only drink with a fruit on the bottom option. we need more chewable drinks
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muscle skoals Retweeted
It’s June 1999 and you just furtively smoked dirt weed in a soccer teammate’s Volvo 740 while the new Dave Matthews plays. You don’t know it, but weed will get so much better. Everything else?
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every chess strategy is called “the snodsbury gambit” or “the ukrainian filibuster”
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i’d probably get elon’s brain accessory if they branded it as “game genie for your head”
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muscle skoals Retweeted
$4.3 million bid for a banksy painting of dogs sitting at a table, playing poker, but the dogs are, they are in gaza
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muscle skoals Retweeted
probably the most metal thing you can do as a person who performs labor of any kind is a wildcat strike, both because it sounds extremely cool and because it... is extremely cool
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