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  1. Sabitlenmiş Tweet
    6 Haz 2020

    it’s never too late to change your life. at age 32 jk rowling was a struggling single mom and now she’s a giant sack of shit

    Geri al
  2. 13 saat önce

    actually no one could tell me in advance what it’ll cost but google says $600-$1000. thank you for defending this sir

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  3. 13 saat önce

    paying $800 tomorrow for a 5 minute medical procedure because i haven’t met my unconscionably high deductible while joe biden speaks about Principles or whatever

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  4. Retweetledi
    22 saat önce

    highlighting sections of Aristotle's "Physics" and just adding the notation "wrong."

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  5. Retweetledi
    17 Oca
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  6. 16 Oca

    why the hell am i wrapping a gift for a 1 year old. this dumbass barely has object permanence, i could just remove it from her field of view for a few seconds

    Geri al
  7. Retweetledi
    14 Oca

    I'm not in a leftwing bubble because it makes me feel good and safe or whatever, it's because I've heard all the arguments on the other side my entire life including in popular media every single day and they all suck ass and hearing them further also sucks ass.

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  8. 14 Oca

    going to pour a nice cup of tea and read the 700 quote tweets to my personal anecdote. what could go wrong

    Geri al
  9. Retweetledi
    14 Oca

    hey sorry im late me and the dudes at the gas station were trading bugs like stocks

    Geri al
  10. 13 Oca

    told my dad about a rough patch i went through mentally and he asked in a concerned voice whether i’d still managed to take my car in for routine maintenance

    Geri al
  11. Retweetledi
    12 Oca

    smoking weed on the Toilet to "balance my humors"

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  12. 12 Oca

    my dick, my crack, a taser heart attack

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  13. Retweetledi
    11 Oca

    Anyone who writes poetry, even very bad poetry, deserves support, because the whole capitalist world tries to batter that impulse out of us, telling you it’s sentimental and useless and cringe to do something like write for no money.

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  14. Retweetledi
    11 Oca

    fish monger and war monger. those are the two main types of monger

    Geri al
  15. Retweetledi
    16 Eyl 2020

    stop talking about kamala’s shoes. stop talking about their innovative sole. stop talking about their removable wheel. stop talking about their seamless transition from shoe to inline skate

    Geri al
  16. Retweetledi
    9 Oca

    i put 75¢ into the drink machine at work and select mtn dew, a sunkist comes out instead. at home later that evening, i walk over to my bookshelf. after a quick scan i see george orwell’s 1984. i somberly remove it from the other fiction books and place it on my nonfiction shelf

    Geri al
  17. 9 Oca

    we are just two twitter bans away from this being the most powerful account in the world

    Geri al
  18. 8 Oca
    Geri al
  19. Retweetledi
    8 Oca

    name a more iconic duo.. i’ll wait

    Geri al
  20. Retweetledi
    13 Kas 2020

    please, mr boombastic is my father’s name

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  21. Retweetledi
    7 Oca

    the cure for lung cancer? prostate cancer.

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