Disreputable Lazy Aliens

So, the top one is my favourite font: "Durrow" from Scriptorium, with my embellishments. But it not only costs $18, which, uncharacteristically perhaps, i'd probably pay, but i don't have a live credit card anyway at the moment. Still, if i had, i'd have maxed it on albums i've heard on Tormented Radio recently: i've ordered VNV Nation's "Matter + Form" (which, incidentally, fucking rocks!) and BlutEngel's "The Oxidising Angel" anyway, on Switch from Amazon.co.uk... Combichrist, Seabound, Covenant, Velvet Acid Christ and Massiv In Mensch would surely have followed; possibly Suicide Commando, Icon of Coil and/or Apoptygma Beserk also; so sick of mp3's.

I can extract a 72 font size rendering from Scriptorium's preview page, but blowing it up to size leaves it jaggy as fuck and, as you can see, my Photoshop skills don't quite stretch far enough to doing it proper justice, going over it. I want it a little scruffy, but not that bad.

So, the second one is an idea for a 'tribal' stylee border, for the top one really, but again, i'm just not really that good at visual arts. The last one is an idea in case i can't get it sorted, but i don't think i'll get something permenently across my left breast that i'm less than happy with, in fairness...

My new paramour is going to have a look, as visual arts is her field, but any input would be greatly appreciated.

Well, they've been running for ages now and we have opinions with which to go forward. The new windows will continue to open: you can always right click/control click a link to open it in a new tag. It seems politics has just edged it, along with Galloway and Bush in a boxing ring. DLA's, i can but try! But given the close run nature of things, the rest will get a look in and the unwarned language may creep back in, also (fuck it, eh?). Interestingly enough, it seems that those of you who have bothered to vote have come out in favour of stern punishment for the lick-spittle lacky scum, Bliar. Again, i can but try, LOL! New one now: >>

UPDATE: Oh yeah, more shameless self-agrandisement too, thus;That's more like it. But then again, i wasn't on the phone and doing something else as well...

DLA's, i'm more than a little touched that many of you have emailed or commented to question my diminished cyber-presence: thank you all! Whatagwaan is that i've been doing some more intensive work on my head, with a fellowship of people for mutual support. It has proved to be necessary for me to be undistracted, hence my disappearance. This isn't, however, the whole story: i've been slacking with my novel for a while, a state of affairs which i'm trying to remedy, and i'll also confess that, rather predictably for this old hog, there are a number of the fairer sex involved also... oh dear, it'll end in tears. Yes, if past experience is anything to go by (and, in fairness, what else is there, ultimately?), it almost certainly will. But one of them is such a walking goddess: intelligent, beautiful, witty, prodigeously talented, also (OMGs save me from the dark seductresses) young and equally black-hearted as i, myself. DLA's, my narcissism but a moth to her combustion... i'm doomed!She sent me this photo of herself the other day... really... what can a man do? I frankly don't care how much it hurts later. So i'm listening to Tormented Radio (it's in the tuner, check it) a lot right now.

That said, i've got a backlog of stuff to put up here: including, but not limited to (oh haha), a reply from my MP, a request for my name & address from the Vermont Legislature, more Imperialists Anonymous, and a full-on political manifesto. Oh, i shit (excuse my French, ahahaahahaah, get it?) you not, DLA's: the mighty edjog is going global... so, soon... I'm learning teasing from this sparkling darkling darling, too... actually i'm lying: i'm merely being reminded of dormant skills...

Well, there we have it. The Channel 4 Political Award for the most inspiring person in UK politics for 2005 goes to Jamie Oliver. What a bunch of navel-gazing, imaginationally challenged saps we are. I couldn't decide between George Galloway and Shami Chakrabarti, so I used two email addresses and voted for them both. Apparently he's got onto Africa now, and fair fucks if he can use his platform to support the cause, but I do wonder if this isn't going to turn into something like Jamie's lessons to Oxfam workers on how to turn EU surplus milk powder into fillet mignon, with a wild herb salad, of course.

I'm depressed.

Technorati Tags: Oliver Channel4 Awards Politics Shame

Mr [Nick] Griffin [BNP] told reporters: "I was speaking the truth to an audience of decent working people in West Yorkshire who in some cases are facing terrible problems, including the grooming of their children by paedophiles." ~ The Grauniad What can one say really? What on earth has paedophilia to do with race? Well, these questions speak directly to this blog's raison d'etre. I'll refer you all to my second ever post. The answer, IMHO, is simply this, "You can take your 'decent working people' and shove 'em up your arse. I'm a Disreputable Lazy Alien and proud of it!"

The Kid's on it though: censorship is not the way. As he says, it's a two edged sword, but also, we cannot defeat The Man by being seen to use The Man's methods. Which is why we must encourage these morons to speak out so that we can use exactly the same kind of rhetorical devices to destroy their arguments and discredit them personally, invisibly. After all, there's no point trying to use reason against the tactic of trying to conflate emotional issues like paedophilia, job security and xenophobia. Any reasonable person has already rejected the patent absurdity out of hand. It is those who are duped emotionally we need to reach.

Nod: the Disillusioned kid: Pleasure and pain

Technorati Tags: decent decency racism bigotry xenophobia hate hatred BNP censorship disreputable lazy aliens

[Ghost of Adam S] Welcome to the Thursday Morning meeting of Imperialists Anonymous. My name is Adam and I am an Imperialist.

[All] Hello Adam.

[Ghost of Adam S] Will somebody be so kind as to read "Who"?

[Ghost of Winston C] My name is Winston and I am an Imperialist.

[All] Hello Winston.

[Ghost of Winston C] Who is an Imperialist?

Most of us do not have to think twice about this question, we know! Our whole life and thinking was centred in domination in one form or another: the getting and using of resources and finding ways and means to monopolise more. We lived to dominate and dominated to live. Very simply, an Imperialist is a man or woman whose life is controlled by the need to control resources. We are people in the grip of a continuing and progressive compulsive obsession whose ends are always the same: inequality, oppression and war.

[All] Thank you, Winston.

[Ghost of Adam S] I'll be obliged to the person who reads "What".

[Ghost of Golda M] Hi, my name's Golda and i'm an Imperialist.

[All] Hello Golda.

[Ghost of Golda M] What is the Imperialists Anonymous programme?

IA is a non-profit fellowship or society of men and women for whom domination had become a major problem. We are recovering Imperialists who meet regularly to help each other remain civilised. This is a programme of complete abstinance from all domination. There is only one requirement for membership: the desire to stop monopolising resources. We suggest you keep an open mind and give yourself a break. Our programme is a set of principles written so simply that we can follow them in our daily lives. The most important thing about them is that they work.

There are no strings attached to IA. We are not affiliated with any other organisations, we have no initiation fees or dues, no pledges to sign, no promises to make to anyone. We are not connected with any political, religious, or law enforcement groups, and are under no surveillance at any time. Anyone may join us regardless of age, race, sexual identity, creed, religion, or lack of religion.

We are not interested in what or how much you dominated, who your allies or victims were, what you have done in the past, how much or how little you have, but only in what you want to do about your problem and how we can help. The newcomer is the most important person at any meeting because we can only keep what we have by giving it away. We have learned from our group experience that those who keep coming to our meetings regularly, remain civilised.

[All] Thank you Golda.

[Ghost of Adam S] If we might continue with "Why"?

[Ghost of Joseph S] My name is Joe and I am an Imperialist.

[All] Hello Joe.

[Ghost of Joseph S] Why are we here?

Before coming to the fellowship of IA, we could not be satisfied by civilisation. We could not live and enjoy life as other people do. We had to have everything and we thought we had found the means in domination. We placed dominion ahead of the welfare of our families, our wives, husbands, children and countries. We had to monopolise resources at all costs. We did many people great harm and also harmed ourselves. Through our inability to accept a civilised approach to life, we were actually creating our own problems. We seemed to be incapable of facing life on its own terms.

Most of us realised that in our Imperialism we were slowly corrupting everything good about ourselves, but Imperialism is such a cunning enemy of life that we had lost the power to do anything about it. Many of us ended up in jail or sought help through political doctrine, religion and economics. None of these methods was sufficient for us. Our compulsive obsession always resurfaced or continued to progress until in desperation we sought help from each other in Imperialists Anonymous.

After coming to IA, we realised we were sick people. We suffered from an obsessive compulsive disorder from which there is no known cure. It can, however, be arrested at some point and civilisation is then possible.

[All] Thank you, Joe.

[Ghost of Adam S] And now "How", if you please.

[Ghost of Harry T] Hey, my name's Harry and I'm an Imperialist.

[All] Hello Harry.

[Ghost of Harry T] How it works.

If you want what we have to offer and are willing to make the effort to get it, the you are ready to take certain steps. These are the principles that made our civilisation possible:

1. We admitted that we were powerless over our Imperialism, that our lives had become uncivilised.
2. We came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
3. We made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him/Her/It.
4. We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
5. We admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
6. We were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
7. We humbly asked Him/Her/It to remove our shortcomings.
8. We made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.
9. We made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10. We continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
11. We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him/Her/It, praying only for knowledge of His/Her/Its will for us and the power to carry that out.
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to Imperialists, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

This sounds like a big order, and we cannot do it all at once. We did not become Imperialists in one day, so remember: easy does it.

There is one thing more than anything else that will defeat us in our civilisation; this is an attitude of indifference or intolerance toward spiritual principles. Three of these that are indispensible are honesty, open-mindedness and willingness. With these we are well on our way.

We feel that our approach to the obsessive compulsive disorder of Imperialism is completely realistic, for the therapeutic value of one Imperialist helping another is without parallel. We feel that our way is practical, for one Imperialist can best understand and help another Imperialist. We believe that the sooner we face our problems, within our society, in everyday living, just that much faster do we become acceptible, responsible and civilised members of that society.

The only way to keep from returning to active Imperialism is not to dominate that first resource. If you are like us you know that one is too many and a thousand never enough. We put great emphasis on this, for we know that when we dominate resources in any form, or substitute one method for another, we release our Imperialism all over again.

Thinking of oil as different from other resources has caused a great many recovering Imperialists to revert to barbarism. Before we came to IA, many of us viewed oil separately, but we cannot afford to be confused about this. Oil is simply a resource. We are people with the obsessive compulsive disorder of Imperialism who must abstain from dominating all resources in order to attain civilisation.

[All] Thank you Harry.

[Ghost of Adam S] I'll take this time to ask if there any newcomers or visitors present and also request you identify yourselves by your given name only.

[George B] Er... my name's George. I'm not sure why I'm here... er people call me...

[All] Hello George. Welcome.

[George B] See I'm the... I mean, huh, I have a righ...

[Ghost of Adam S] That's quite alright George, we surely do understand. If you listen to this gathering here tonight, things may become clearer. I'll ask that all symbols of oppression be left outside the meeting place, for the protection of the group, and that any newfangled contraptions of communication be rendered silent.

We will proceed with a formal system of sharing which will remain free from interuption if possible. Any questions should be reserved for the end of the meeting. The penultimate ten minutes will be set aside for newcomers or those who find it difficult to share and I'll add that, if anyone has exerted dominion today, that they should save their comments toward the end of the meeting and be certain to speak to somebody before we go our separate ways.

With that, I'll hand over to Ronald who has come here tonight to share his experience, strength and hope.

[All] Thank you Adam.

[Ghost of Ronald R] My name's Ron and I'm an Imperialist.

[All] Hello Ronny!

We'll leave this IA meeting now, but stay tuned for Ron's share and comments, observations and identification by the likes of Nicollo M, Ghengis K, Gaius J, Adolf H, Cecil R, Rameses P, Asa G C and of course more from those already introduced...

Technorati Tags: Anonymous Empire Imperial Imperialist Imperialism Addict compulsion OCD greed domination oppression Bush Dubya Smith Churchill Meir Stalin Truman Reagan satire civilisation

Sounds fair enough to me...

URGENT: They've kidnapped Pinochet WE NEED YOUR COLLABORATION [translation from Chilean Spanish] AN HOUR AGO A GROUP OF DELINQUENTS (taking advantage of a negligence of the Security Forces), KIDNAPPED GENERAL (R) AUGUSTO PINOCHET! They have demanded $100 million for his liberation and warned that, if their requirements are not met within 24 hours, they will sprinkle him with fuel and set fire to him... We are organizing a collection, appealing to your humanity to donate what you can... Currently we have managed to amass: 7,800 liters of PETROL... 2,231 liters of PARAFFIN... 1,986 phosphorus boxes... 126 blowtorches and 231,985 lighters... even so... we fear that it is not sufficient for the task, all donations, however small, are welcome... otherwise the unthinkable, he may be left alive...!!! (thanks The GuNNer for the joke) jajajaja! xD

So DLA's, in the comments of my last post Michael the tubthumper drew attention to the plight of Rosemarie Jackowski, an American journalist in her 60's who has not only been convicted of "Disorderly Conduct with Intent to Harass and Annoy" for peacefully demonstrating against the war in Iraq (she joined with others to halt traffic so that drivers would see their placards; her case is under appeal), but is also a litigant against the corrupt State of Vermont after being almost killed in a traffic accident involving a state owned truck, whilst on the way to visit her 89 year old sick mother. The State's Attourney's office have been giving her a rough ride and it has taken about 6 years to get her case heard. Check it.

I'll urge you all to go there, read the article, consider just how disorderly, harassing or annoying this unarmed woman in her 60's (pictured above) can actually be, what relevance to the fact that she was run into by a logging truck her political stance, her divorce 35 years ago or her brutal rape 40 years ago have, and email Dick Sears, Chairman of the State Judiciary Committee and Gaye Symington, Speaker of the State House, to let them know that the eyes of the world are watching. I've also emailed Ms. Jackowski herself to let her know that she is heard: it seemed the proper thing to do; i'll bet she must feel very out on a limb right now. If you are a US citizen, you can also contact Governor of Vermont, Jim Douglas, through his website. In case anyone is stuck for what to write, here is what i said:

Dear [Dick Sears/Gaye Symington/Jim Douglas],

the treatment of Ms. Rosemarie Jackowski by the State of Vermont is a calumny against The Constitution of the USA.

Be in no doubt that the whole world knows of this and similar hypocrisy. Do you find it at all surprising then to find US foreign policy the subject of open derision?

Quite apart from the morality of the issues relating to Ms. Jackowski and others like her, I'll ask you to consider this: with a $650 billion Trade Deficit, the US cannot afford much more war. If you want to promote US interests abroad, you will have to address the culture of institutionalised corruption at home, sooner or later.

Why not start now? Be bold. Be a true patriot. We're watching.

[insert your name]

UPDATE (while i was typing this): Ms. Jackowski replied to my email thus:

"Great letter. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. I need all the help I can get.
rosemarie"

So there we are, she needs our support. Do it. Do it now.

UPDATE (04:05 2006/02/01 GMT): so Rosemarie emailed to say we can keep up with whatagwaan at Mickey Z's where she is a contributor. It's now in the TEXT LINKS also.

Technorati Tags: Jackowski Vermont corruption victimisation

DLA's, you know i try to bring you the best the net has to offer, but i must confess to having failed in one area. The website in question first came to my attention a couple of years ago, when we all had a good laugh about it @uni, and has since been updated a bit.

I'll ask you to understand that, without my constant vigilance, i am prone to becoming a mentalist and this is precisely what happened for a couple of years. Standard quality of service having been resumed and after a timely reminder from Guerrillasinthemidst (who also goes into the blogroll) however, the situation is rectified:


It'll go into the links also, as soon as i finish here. Let us hope that they have internet access in heaven, so when The Chimp finally goes to the great tyre-swing in the sky, St. Peter will have all the amunition he needs to tell him to fuck right off.

Technorati Tags: Bush Dubya lies dishonesty mendacity idiot moron

Pots, kettles and "a daughter of a whore".

So yeah DLA's, it seems to be the thing to have an alternate post style for tiny segments that don't need much or any additional waffle. This will be mine.

UPDATE (03:12 2006/01/30 GMT): Oh for the love of beating old ladies with a stick! It's fucked in Internet Excrementer again! It's the tiny bit of the Alien Abduction image that sticks out at the side, i think (which i actually thought was rather stylish: not quite symmetrical; interesting). Fucking Microshit! BTW, new link: "Stop IE". TBH, i'm really not sure that i can actually be arsed to sort it out again. There are limits. I've got to be able to have some pride.