ABC of potty training

Potty training is one milestone in your child’s development that you're probably eagerly awaiting. Though some toddlers adjust in a few days, bear in mind that it may take your little one several months to get into the potty habit (Gavin 2019). And there will be setbacks and accidents along the way. But when your child is ready to learn this new skill, they will. And if you wait until they’re really ready to start, the process shouldn't be too painful for either of you.

How do I know if my child’s ready for potty training?

There's no right age to start potty training, as every child is different (Gavin 2019). Parents usually think about training when their child is between 18 months and three years old (ERIC 2020). Most children are between two years and two-and-a-half years old when they start (Baird et al 2019, ERIC 2020).

Don't feel pushed into toilet training your child too soon because of pressure from other parents or your family. Watch for the signs that your child is ready to start training, and don't start before then (NCT 2018).

Talk to your toddler about what you are going to do, and decide what you're going to call wee and poo (ERIC 2020, Turner and Matlock 2021)! Still not sure if your child is ready? Check out our expert advice on potty training readiness.

Make potty-training preparations

Go on a special trip with your child to buy some new pants and a potty. This will help them to get excited about potty training (NCT 2018). A potty may be easier to start with, rather than a toilet. It's easy to get on and off, and can be moved around the house. However, you may want to buy a training seat to attach to your toilet.

If your child uses a toilet seat, you'll also need a footstep so they can stabilise themselves with their feet and push when they’re having a poo. It will also allow them to get on and off the loo independently.

You might be tempted to try training pants for your toddler instead of, or as well as, proper underwear. Cloth training pants are similar to regular pants, but have an absorbent pad inside to cope with small accidents. However, some experts think that it may hinder, rather than help with potty training. This is because they can make it harder for your child feel to wetness when they have an accident, so they can’t make the connection between having a wee and doing it in the potty (ERIC 2020).

If your little one doesn’t seem keen on pants, try letting them choose ones with their favourite cartoon characters or in their favourite colour (NCT 2018). Or let them wear their pants for short periods while they get used to the feeling (ERIC 2020).

You could also show your toddler a fun picture book or a video about using the potty, to get them interested in what's to come (ERIC 2020).

BabyCentre selects products based on the research of our editors and the wisdom of parents in the BabyCentre Community. We may earn a commission from shopping links.

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A potty of your child’s choice

Whether they select Peppa, Paw Patrol or simply their favourite colour, letting your child choose the potty they’d like to use can be a big help when it comes to getting them to sit on it.

My Carry Potty comes in a variety of fun designs, including animals like a bee, ladybird, cow, dinosaur, penguin, cat and fox. Or, your little one might prefer to choose one of the bright colours. It’s also designed to be portable so you can take it out and about.

Available from My Carry PottyOpens a new window, Jo Jo Maman BebeOpens a new window or AmazonOpens a new window.

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Potty training seat

If your child would prefer to use the toilet, a training seat can help them by making the toilet hole smaller, so they can sit on it comfortably. If they get to choose a seat they want to use, it also makes the experience more fun.

This Paw Patrol seat is available from AmazonOpens a new window.

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Sticker chart

Praise definitely helps your child feel every little wee on the potty was worth it. Make sure you reward sitting on the loo or wiping at first, rather than having a wee or a poo, as this can take time to master (ERIC 2020). Deciding on a reward once they reach a certain number of stickers can really boost their motivation. There are a wide range of charts available online that can be used for potty training, even magnetic ones Opens a new windowthat can be reused to help your child learn other behaviours.

This chart is available from AmazonOpens a new window.

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Potty training pants

Like a slightly thicker pair of pants, these are a great option if you’re out and about, when an accident may be really tricky to deal with. They offer a lot of protection, but your child won’t feel like they’re still in a nappy. There are plenty of designs, or bright colours to choose from.

Available on AmazonOpens a new window.

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A book about toilet training

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Toilet step

It doesn’t matter how determined your child is, if they’re keen to use the toilet a step will help them get there. Choose from a double step like this one or a single step.

Available on AmazonOpens a new window.

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Colour-changing stickers

Step aside chocolate and sweets, these stickers encourage your child to use the potty by revealing an image once they’re covered in wee. They’re a clever idea and may just tempt a reluctant child to use the potty.

Available from AmazonOpens a new window.

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Pushchair seat protector

You never know when an accident might happen, so to protect your pushchair consider investing in a seat protector.

Available from Koo-di WetecOpens a new window or AmazonOpens a new window.

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Car seat protector

Similar to the pushchair seat, a car seat protector may also help prevent the faff of stripping apart your child’s car seat to wash it when they’ve had an accident.

Available from AmazonOpens a new window.

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Potty liners

If you know you’ll be in an environment where emptying the contents of the potty is going to be hard such as a park or a festival, then potty liners may be the answer. These biodegradable ones are a great option so you can dispose of the potty contents without too much mess.

Available from AmazonOpens a new window.

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Waterproof mattress protector

Dry nights may be a little way off, so a waterproof mattress protector is worth the investment in case of night-time accidents. This one comes in a range of sizes, including cot or cot bed if your child hasn’t moved up to a single bed yet.

Available from AmazonOpens a new window.

What approach should I take to potty training?

Take things slowly to begin with. Encourage your toddler to sit on the potty once a day and tell them "It’s potty time" (ERIC 2020). This may be after breakfast, before their bath, or whenever they’re likely to have a poo (ERIC 2020).

Sit your child on the potty after they’ve had a wet or dirty nappy. This reinforces where the wee and poo is meant to go and encourages them to get used to the potty and accept it as part of their routine.

If they don’t want to sit on it, that's fine. Never restrain your child or force them to sit there. And don't push the issue if they seem scared. If they’re not interested, just put a nappy back on them and put the potty aside for a few weeks before trying again (ERIC 2020). At this stage, you just want them to get used to the potty.

If they show an interest, start explaining that this is what everybody in the family does, every day. Say that pulling your pants down before you sit down to go to the loo is the grown-up thing to do. Your child loves to watch and copy you so take advantage (ERIC 2020)!

If they get the idea and manage to poo, that's great. But don't push them to perform. Wait until they’re ready and show a clear interest in using the potty on their own. If you persist when your child isn’t ready, they may get upset and you'll become increasingly frustrated. This can turn toilet training into a battleground. Remember that it’s a new skill that takes time for your little one to learn (ERIC 2020).

Lots of parents find that it's easier to potty train in the summer, when there are fewer clothes to take off, and washing dries faster (NHS 2018). Make sure the potty is always in a convenient place or buy a couple of potties, one for upstairs and one for downstairs (Turner and Matlock 2021).

Let everyone who looks after your child know that you're going to start potty training. It’s more effective if grandparents, nursery staff or childminders and any other caregivers all use the same, consistent approach. They may have helpful advice and experiences to share that will help with your potty training plans too.

If you have relatives that frequently care for your child, you could suggest that they sign up for BabyCentre emails. This way, they'll receive the latest potty training tips at the same time as you.

Demonstrate how to go to the toilet

Children learn by copying. Seeing you have a wee or a poo will help your toddler to understand the purpose of a toilet (ERIC 2020). If you have a little boy, try teaching him to wee sitting down to begin with. This helps him to empty his bladder better, and it can prompt him to remember he needs a poo too (ERIC 2020).

Talk about how you can tell it's time for you to go to the toilet. Then explain what's going on as you go yourself. Show them how you wipe with toilet paper, pull up your underwear, flush the toilet, and then wash your hands.

You'll be helping your toddler with these activities for some time, especially with wiping after a poo. But seeing you do it, and talking them through it step-by-step, will get them used to the whole process.

If your toddler has older siblings, or friends who are potty-trained, it may help to see them using the toilet. Encourage family members to leave the door to the bathroom open and let your child see how everyone goes to the loo (ERIC 2020).

The next time your toddler poos in their nappy, take them to their potty, sit them down, and empty the nappy beneath them into the bowl. This will help them make the connection between sitting and pooing.

After you've emptied their potty into the big toilet, let them flush it if they want to, but don't make them do it if they’re scared. Then encourage them to pull up their pants and wash their hands when they’re done.

Persevere with the potty

Once you’ve established your little one’s readiness for potty training, encourage them to use their potty whenever they feel the urge to go. Give them plenty to drink and ask them to sit on the potty every few hours (ERIC 2020). But make sure they know that they can also tell you if they need to go, and that you'll accompany them whenever they want you to.

At first, your little one will need frequent prompting from you to go to the loo. Chances are, if you ask if they want to do a wee, they'll reply with a "no". Instead, try saying: "Go and do a wee, then we can go outside and play," so they have more direction from you.

If you can, let them run around sometimes without a nappy, or without any clothing below the waist, with the potty nearby. Tell them they can use it whenever they want to and remind them occasionally that it's there if they need it.

Some toddlers won't sit on the potty long enough to relax and let anything come out. Calmly encourage your little one to stay put for longer by talking to them calmly, or reading them a story (ERIC 2020). You could also try blowing bubbles as a way to help them relax and hold their attention.

When your toddler uses the potty successfully, tell them they’re doing well and that you’re proud of them. It can be tricky to find the right balance between being encouraging and going overboard though. Getting too excited about a poo in the potty could make your little one afraid to fail next time, which may lead to more accidents.

Rewards are a great way to get your toddler enthusiastic about potty training. Simple and instant rewards, such as stickers, work best (ERIC 2020).

Some children are frightened by the idea of their poo or wee falling into the potty or toilet. Be sure to reassure your little one, but be firm that all poo and wee must eventually go down the toilet. Try involving them by letting them help you empty the potty or dirty nappy into the toilet at first (ERIC 2020).

How should I react to potty training accidents?

Your child will have several accidents before they’re completely trained, in the day and night. It can be frustrating, but don't get angry or punish them (ERIC 2020). Mastering the process will take time. When they have an accident, calmly clean it up without any fuss and suggest that next time they try to use their potty instead. Sit them on the potty afterwards, to show them where the wee or poo should have gone.

Accidents are part of the potty training process. But if there are lots of accidents and very little progress, go back to nappies and shelve potty training for a while. Your toddler may not be ready yet (ERIC 2020). It doesn't mean that you've failed, and it's the best thing to do if you want potty training to work in the long-run.

Night-time potty training

Even when your child is consistently clean and dry all day, it may take them several more months or years to master being dry at night (Gavin 2019, NHS 2018). So don't throw away those nappies just yet. Your little one’s body is still too immature to reliably wake them up in the middle of the night just to go to the loo.

Most parents start to night train when their child is between three years and four years, and has woken up with a dry nappy a few mornings in a row (ERIC nd).

Is your little one ready to say goodbye to bedwetting? Check out our guide to night-time potty training and the signs of readiness for dry nights.

More potty-training advice

• Potty training for boys
• Potty training for girls
• Parents’ top toilet-training tips