To many, many people, it is gratifying to watch me suffer and claw my way out of various messes! My pain and misery is like PORNO to them!
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Jason "Kray Tom" Kelley
@JGKelley
Jason "Kray Tom" Kelley’s Tweets
one minute you’re young and the next minute you’re “making a big salad”
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You dance in a hanging garden, laughing. You are pricked by a thorn. You put some seeds in your pocket.
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Vince Guaraldi was the Angelo Badalamenti of his time
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my 90-year-old grandma was complaining about technology so i said “adapt or die, grandma” and she responded “i’m working on the dying”
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please boost Milton
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me (pretending i know garfield to seem cool): granfield is actually a great guy
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Ah, but i may as well try and catch the wind was the original ah, well, nevertheless
We've let the web shrink down to one puny "link in bio" on your social media profile, with services trying to charge you money for *links*! So we're fixing that at , with the new FREE Glitch In Bio — a links page that does anything the web can do.
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one thing editors can do is help you find better analogies
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When you break a right winger’s brain by explaining this right wing infighting:
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“Weak, hyper-effete men “leading” with emotions instead of reason and logic is a big reason Western society is crumbling. Given Elon’s Reddit-tier political takes and patchy soy beard, it wouldn’t surprise me at all to find out that he is low on the testosterone side.”
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Lol Andrew Torba of Gab wrote about Elon: “Twitter was, ironically, more measured and free when there were thousands of mentally ill blue-haired Communists with their fingers on the ban hammer.”
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do all sufficiently advanced societies eventually create Garfield
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lol, lmao
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Elon Musk's team is seeking new investors for Twitter, offering the same $54.20-a-share deal and trying to close by the end of the year. Scoop w/ @ReedAlbergotti semafor.com/article/12/16/
how can we be in 2022 and people still dont know how the first amendment works
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There’s no longer ANY question that the censorship on Twitter was a First Amendment violation, the only remaining question is how deep is the rabbit hole? twitter.com/mtaibbi/status…
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the thing about switching platforms that's weird is in the earlier days of the internet, you expected to do this regularly -- there was always something new that replaced whatever you were just figuring out
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that nuclear fusion announcement coming at the same time as the DJT NFT and elon twitter really asks the question, "what if star trek but also idiocracy"
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wow hes really doing a lowtax speedrun
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wild back to back tweets.
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Twitter’s new rules say that you can get banned for posting a photo of Chaya Raichik but she can post whatever private information of yours on Libs of TikTok she feels like if she says it’s part of the culture war
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Similar thought experiment: no one would want cops on every block, but that's what you're doing when you put cop cameras on every block.
Seems weird to be ok with cop cameras on every block but not OK with sharing already public info...twitter.com/Jason/status/1
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a surprising amount of my personality was formed when my mouse broke in 1997 and i had to navigate my computer using only a keyboard for two weeks
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If Elon went on a tour of stadiums where he just let the whole crowd boo at him for an hour, he could pay off his Twitter debt
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A bartender knew my name this week for the first time in my life, so, achievement unlocked, I guess
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They are all so mad trump lost
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1. A new #TwitterFiles investigation reveals that teams of Twitter employees build blacklists, prevent disfavored tweets from trending, and actively limit the visibility of entire accounts or even trending topics—all in secret, without informing users.
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cant wait
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it worked
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Automated
I stretch and strain with all my might
Drift off into the velvety arms of the night
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Cyberdyne: coming to a precinct near you. penny-arcade.com/comic/2022/12/
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never go full greenwald
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