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Introducing MUSK:
The Mask for Men“OUR masks are made from material that’s as TOUGH and unyielding and uncomfortable as the comments you leave on Barstool Sports’ articles about how lady sports commentators SUCK.” -
Open Letters to People or Entities Who Are Unlikely to Respond
An Open Letter to Santa Claus Regarding His Travel Plans
“You will choke on a crumb. You will cough. You will spray dozens of contaminated droplets around the house. The child will get one pair of Circle Society JoJo Siwa Roller Skates for a lifetime of respiratory damage.” -
Donald Trump’s
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Even Though We Have Done Nothing Wrong, I, Vito Corleone, Am Pardoning My Entire Family
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The Best Books to Gift This 2020 Holiday Season
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November 24, 2020Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing (So Far): Atrocities 1- 1,004
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August 24, 2020Frog and Toad Tentatively Go Outside After Months In Self-Quarantine
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September 1, 2020Quiz: Are You the Worst Fucking Parent?
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November 30, 2020We Are Unable to Offer You a Place at Yale Because Your Essay Read Like the Closing Narration of a Teen Rom-Com
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November 12, 2020Meet Olivia! The COVID-19-Era American Girl Doll
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November 20, 2020Quiz: Should You Expose Your Relative to COVID-19 This Thanksgiving?
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December 3, 20201918 Flu Pandemic
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November 30, 2020McSweeney’s Books: An Interview with Jehad al-Saftawi About His New Book, My Gaza: A City in Photographs
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November 24, 2020Shop Locally This Holiday Season. Please Don’t Give More Money to Amazon
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November 24, 2020Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing (So Far): Atrocities 1- 1,004
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November 19, 2020Short Conversations With Poets: Vijay Seshadri
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November 17, 2020Short Conversations With Poets: Valzhyna Mort
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November 12, 2020Short Conversations With Poets: Christian Wiman
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December 3, 2020Thoughts on Our Nude Sushi Model
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December 2, 2020“Home Away from Home Alone”: A College Admissions Essay by Kevin McCallister
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December 2, 2020The Catholic Church Is Modernizing!
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December 2, 2020Ten Reasons Why My New York Bodega Is Better Than Your 7-Eleven
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December 2, 2020Bryan Quinby, Singing “The Birthday Song” at Chuck E. Cheese
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