I am female. I've had tons of meaningless relationships, I've slept with tons of guys, I've partied multiple times, got drunk multiple times and basically I was the definition of a sl* t. I did it to fit in with the horrible friends I had. Thinking of my past makes me feel disgusted. When I was in my...
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I am female. I've had tons of meaningless relationships, I've slept with tons of guys, I've partied multiple times, got drunk multiple times and basically I was the definition of a sl* t. I did it to fit in with the horrible friends I had. Thinking of my past makes me feel disgusted. When I was in my mid teens I wanted to get married and have a beautiful family but after everything I have done I don't see how the person I am going to marry is going to be anyone special. I feel that my actions took all the magic away.
And no, I am not depressed nor do I have any other mental illness. I've been to a doctor about it. It's that I genuinely feel bad for my life. What can I do to make a change? I've dumped all my "friends", I've been single for 6 months because that relationship was a waste of time and (this may sound silly) I am dressing a lot more modestly because I feel better. I also know someone much older than me who experienced something similar and devoted her life to God, but unfortunately I am agnostic so I can't do it because I don't really believe it even though it would be great if I could. But now everyone knows me as a sl *t in my university. Can this ever change? What can I do to become a different and a better person?