You say damage. I say improvement.

Sandra, I know it looks like I've burned all your cat trees to a pile of ash in the front yard, but really, I was just helping. Let me explain: it's called a controlled burn. You burn the cat trees, the ashes enrich the soil, the cat trees grow back bigger and stronger than ever! It's true! I read about that on the Discovery Channel! Wait, what??? Cat trees aren't like real trees? But what about all the fruit I've harvested from them? 

Sandra, it's about the time in our relationship that I tell you I am an insane person who escaped from an asylum. I hope this doesn't affect the good thing we have going here.

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