Today's Woot Write-up
Here's the thing: If I have to eat you, I'm going to use one of these knives.
Oh, don't get me wrong: I'm not threatening you or anything. I consider you a dear friend! But if tragedy were to strike and we were to become stranded in a forest in a blizzard or something, I could use either of these knives to gut and clean your corpse. I mean, I wouldn't enjoy such a thing; I would only do it if it were a matter of life and death and I had to eat your flesh to survive. I would ask your blessing in your final moments, but to be honest it wouldn't really matter once you were gone, right? You're not using it any more.
Look, if you can take any comfort in this, just know that their innovative designs would provide me with a secure grip while I worked the meat away from your bones. And the serrated edges will make cutting easier and give me superior penetrating power. I won't expend much precious energy harvesting much-needed calories.
What do you mean, "what if I die first?" In that case, you'd have to get your own friggin' knife.
