The smartest dog “gets” 340+ words according to the BBC…actually I think I’ve starred the bitch several times & ReTweeted her at least once.

ℂℂℂℂℂℂℂℂℂℂℂ ℂ♓ ℂ℘℘℘℘℘℘℘ ∗ℂ ℂ♓ ℂ℘ ♓♓♓♓℘ ∗ℂ ℂ♓ ℂ℘  ℂℂ♓℘ ∗ℂ ℂ♓ ℂ℘   ℂ♓℘ ∗ℂ ℂ♓ ℂ℘  ℂℂ♓℘ ∗ℂ ℂ♓ ℂ℘ ♓♓♓♓℘ ∗ℂ ℂ♓ ℂ℘℘℘℘℘℘℘ ∗ℂ ℂ♓ ℂℂℂℂℂℂℂℂℂℂℂ ℂ♓

I'm too shallow for this grave.

Drowning in you, but in a good way.

I'm "every time I look at a ceiling fan I see Vic Morrow's head being severed by helicopter blades" years old.

Since joining Twitter, about 8 aggressive lampposts have walked up to me in the street and punched me in the face.

௵௵௵௵௵௵௵ ௵ௐௐௐௐௐௐௐௐௐௐ௵ ௵ௐ⩙⩙⩙⩙⍆⍆⍆⩙⨋⨋⨋ௐ௵  ௵ௐ⨴⩙⍰⍰⩙⍆⍆⍆⩙⨋⨋ௐ௵  ௵ௐ⨴⨴⩙⍰⍰⩙⍆⍆⍆⩙⨋ௐ௵  ௵ௐ⨴⨴⨴⩙⍰⍰⩙⩙⩙⩙⩙ௐ௵  ௵ௐௐௐௐௐௐௐௐௐௐ௵ ௵௵௵௵௵௵௵

Twitter is just proof that as adults most of us still can't be left unsupervised.

I called one of those numbers in the bathroom stall and my wife answered. Very funny guys.

My Superpower: Repeating something back to someone and making it sound dirty.

It's not that I accept the Terms and Conditions. It's just that I would rather not spend the rest of my life reading them.

Tragic News: Plane carrying Donald Trump underwent massive turbulence, lost engine power, stalled, but landed safely.

#140art ♛♛♛♛♛♛♛♛♛♛♛♛♛♛♛♛♛♛♛♛♛♛ ⓄⓃⒺ         ♛⧻⧻⧻⧻⧻⧻⧻♛ ⒷⓁⒶⒸⓀ        ♛⧻⧻⧻⧻⧻♛ ⓅⓇⒺⓈⒾⒹⒺⓃⓉ     ♛⧻⧻⧻♛ ⒶⓃⒹ            ♛⧻♛ Ⓐ               ♛

ⓂⒾⓁⓁⒾⓄⓃ         ♕ ⒷⓁⒶⒸⓀ          ♕⧻♕ ⓂⒺⓃ           ♕⧻⧻⧻♕ ⒾⓃ           ♕⧻⧻⧻⧻⧻♕ ⓅⓇⒾⓈⓄⓃ      ♕⧻⧻⧻⧻⧻⧻⧻♕ ♕♕♕♕♕♕♕♕♕♕♕♕♕♕♕♕♕♕♕♕♕♕ #140art