I (21F) just finished college and was finally looking forward to starting my life. I went to college with a lot of my expenses paid for by scholarships and grants and I’ve always been pretty responsible financially. I saved up a lot of money while in school and was able to buy my own small apartment. I just landed a job in my field, where I’ll be making about $45k a year. It’s not a ton, but it’s enough for me to be independent and comfortable, especially in an entry-level job.

My older sister (27F) has struggled with heroin addiction for years, and things recently got worse. She was arrested and is now facing a long time in jail, possession with intent to distribute, and an illegal firearms charge while in possession of drugs. The real issue is that she just gave birth a few days ago to a baby girl, my niece, who was born addicted to heroin. The baby is still in the hospital, going through withdrawal, and it’s absolutely heartbreaking to see. This poor baby is innocent in all of this, and it kills me to think about the rough start she’s having.

Now, my family is pressuring me to adopt the baby. They say that because I’m the most "stable" one in the family, it’s my responsibility to step up. Nobody else has the financial ability to add an extra person, especially a baby, to their home. They keep telling me that I’m the best option because I have my own place, a steady income, and no major responsibilities or kids of my own. Technically, I could do it, but I don’t feel ready.

I’m only 21. I just finished college and haven’t even started my career yet. I’m terrified of taking on such a huge responsibility, especially for a newborn with special needs. I don’t know the first thing about raising a child, let alone one who’s been through so much already. I don't even really want kids. I’ve tried explaining this to my family, but they keep saying that I’m being selfish and that if I don’t take her in, she’ll end up in the foster care system. My mom even accused me of abandoning my niece, just like my sister did by getting involved with heroin.

The worst part is that the baby is being discharged from the hospital in a few days, and the pressure from my family is getting more intense. I’m so close to breaking because I do care about my niece, and I don’t want her to suffer. But I’m also scared out of my mind that I won’t be able to give her the life she deserves, and I’m worried that I’ll end up feeling trapped or resentful.

I feel like I’m damned if I do, damned if I don’t. AITA?

EDIT: I have been told to put this in my post by a person who messaged me here. MY FAMILY AND I ARE DENE. ICWA applies here. I'm sorry I didn't put it in the original post.

We met young in college and got married right after grad school. A while ago my wife was texting a co worker and I thought nothing of it. A few months ago while talking she brought him up during a convo about her work. Eventually told me how he was complaining about his wife etc etc. I didn’t think too much of it bc never in a million years would I think my wife would cheat, but I basically told her it’s inappropriate and could lead to emotional affair etc. convo seemed to go fine and no big deal for either of us

So a few days ago we got out with friends to a bar. I wasn’t feeling it and left around 10 knowing she was fine with all of her girl friends and had a ride home. Stayed up until midnight made sure she was ok then went to bed. Wake up in the morning and she’s in bed. I was curious that she didn’t text telling me she was coming home and wanted to see how she got home so looked at her phone. Can’t say that I’ve ever looked at her texts but maybe my subconscious made me do it.

Anyways, so I see that she was texting her coworker. After I left bar she started texting him. Telling him she wanted to see him. He responded that people would see them etc. then my wife responded they could meet in the bathroom. Then he responded jokingly saying “good thing you delete your messages”. So I scroll up and yes she has no older messages from him even though I’m sure they have to text each other for work etc.

So I wake her up, she’s hungover, I’m in shock she did this. I show her the texts and she looks surprised and confused. Long story short she denies they have done anything physical, loves me etc etc. she won’t let me confront him even though she knows she screwed up etc… I got a hotel and my dad came down to help me get through this. AIO?