Q&As

My husband cheated on me with his best friend in the beginning of our marriage. She only chose to tell me after she found out that we are pregnant. We have been trying to get pregnant for 3 years (married for 5).

I feel that I can’t have a baby with him. He is very mentally unwell now because of it. It is so unfair that he is the one who is unwell and I have to be the strong one between us when I am the cheated party.

I (15M) am a middle child of 7 sisters.

Yesterday my eldest sister, Sophia (22F) got married to her fiancé and I was very excited. I’m very close with Sophia and I like her husband.

I have mild cerebral palsy, this means I often use a cane/crutches to walk, mainly for balance.

Sophia had asked me to make my cane more presentable for a wedding. (The theme was black/white) which I totally understand (my normal one is covered in stickers). I obviously get that it wasn’t exactly formal so I wrapped it in black tape, which my sister was happy with.

Come day of her wedding and I was just having a very “off” day, my legs hurt and my balance was way off. Although I planned on using my black cane I ended up having to use my crutches which are blue. I figured it would be fine (because who would care anyways?)

I didn’t actually get to greet my sister until it was the reception. She seemed awfully offended that I was using my blue crutches and asked if I could just stay seated and not have the crutches out to not “ruin the colour scheme” I was frustrated but I just did it because it’s my sister and she’s right, they stood out a lot.

Come time for pictures and I was heavily relying on my crutches for balance that day. My sister complained to our mum in a cranky voice “Boris (me) is ruining the pictures”. I told her to suck it up. Then she begged our mum to tell me to not be in the FAMILY PHOTOS. I was sure that my mum would notice how ridiculous that is but my mum just sided with my sister and told me that I was technically ruining the theme.

My mum, Sophia and I all got into an argument, I couldn’t believe my sister was crying about something so stupid.

My sisters makeup was ruined and now her pictures had “ugly blue crutches” in them. Our mum told me to just leave and had the grooms brother drive me home. I wasn’t allowed to stay for food, or the cake cutting.

My whole family is saying “it’s her special day” and how I ruined it by causing a fuss. I can’t possible understand how this is reasonable.

AITAH?

Edit: for everyone saying this could easily be fixed with photoshop/chair, this escalated pretty quickly. It had already turned into one of those “sibling’ fights before anyone even was thinking of a solution.

But thank you for everyone agreeing with me, I don’t feel so insane anymore.

Edit: if thought my crutches would bother Sophia I would have tapped them. This would have required me to tape them during the ceremony. I really, honestly, truly didn’t think she would care. So I didn’t bother.

I have this nephew Jake (38) who likes to use big words and show off his intelligence. The thing is with Jake he has never lived on his own and has had mostly low paying jobs as a retail security gaud.

My daughter Anna (17) is going to college on a STEM scholarship and is already signed up for a work program through the school. She’s also more than 20 years younger than Jake. So yes this is her big accomplishment and we had a going away party for her. She got so cute things for her dorm is excited. She also was a little emotional because she will be leaving our family and there was some tears.

Jake was a asshole trying to quiz my daughter but Jake didn’t even go to college or receive any scholarship. My daughter was annoyed and didn’t want to play Jake’s trivia games him because Jake will gloat if she gets something wrong. My daughter finally flipped out on Jake because of something said about student loans. My daughter told Jake that she doesn’t have student loans because she is smart then him and he’s just jealous because he has never had the courage to do anything except be miserable take in dead in jobs and live with his mommy until the age of 40

This was my daughter going away party and my sister grabbed her gift and started calling my daughter ungrateful and Jake called my daughter the C word. A man older than her says that to a teenager. I told Jake and my sister to get the fuck out of my home and not come back. I told Anna she doesn’t ever have to apologize and make herself smaller for people like Jake. Fuck people like him.

My mom (their) grandmother said young ladies should be gracious at their own party and I was giving my daughter some bad advice. I asked my mom why is it okay for Jake to be arrogant when my daughter can’t? My mom left after that say I have raised a spoiled brat who doesn’t know her place. I disagree and I tried my best to cheer my daughter up but it did put a mood on her going away party?

Throwaway.

I (34M) recently inherited $400k from our parents’ estate after they passed away. There was a slight delay in my part in receiving the said amount because of some legal complications. My younger brother (31M) received the same amount, but just months after their death, he was swindled out of nearly all his life savings by a shady investment scheme.

Now, he's asking me to share $200k of my inheritance with him to help him get back on his feet. He argues that our parents would have wanted us to have equal financial standing, and that losing his money wasn't his fault (yeah right) and that he'd pay me back all later.

I feel terrible for him, but I don't think it's fair to give up half of my inheritance for a mistake he made, no matter how unfortunate. I’ve been working hard, budgeting, and planning to use this money for my family’s future. If I give him half, it puts my own financial security at risk.

My wife supports my decision, but some relatives think I'm being greedy and heartless, saying family comes first.

AITAH?

Edit: Wow this blew up. I didn't think I'd need online strangers to knock sense into me. Also, it's funny how quickly someone can go from calling every hour to a direct block.

I called my brother, and asked him what EXACTLY happened, and told him I'd only give him the money if he told me the truth, and only the truth. He told me he invested in a company called Aramco (obviously not the real one) to a sheikh, and paid his deposit of 10000 the first time, where he got back 20000. Then he began scaling up, and always got doubled. Until 100k. He got back 110k, then was emboldened and invested 300k, and was guaranteed 600k, and the rest is history. He made a police report, but had no evidence to share, as he withdrew in cash and dealt in cash itself, taking only token receipts, which were fake. He kept the previously gotten amount in cash in his house.

I only came to know how stupid someone can get.

I told him his lack of basic common sense and greed does not constitute grounds for charity on my part, and told him to take better care of the remaining 100k. He cussed me out and told me I disappointed my parents.

As for my relatives, I told them all in the group chat that I'd only match whatever they would pay to my brother, and even offered to double it, since I was so greedy and I wanted to prove them wrong (thanks to a legendary commenter who suggested that, I love you) I was cussed out there too lol. They're all blocked now. They told me the money got into my head.

Sorry for not replying to the comments. I was really weakening in my resolve not to pay him, and you guys just snapped me back. Thank you. You all saved me.

We was staying with my parents for two weeks and my daughter Lizzie is a vegetarian. We bought some impossible beef and was going to use it for a later date. My whole family gives Lizzie a hard time for being vegetarian but she has been one for almost ten years from 6-16. I have gotten all kinds of hell around the holidays because of things Lizzie wouldn’t eat because it had chicken broth or bacon fat in it.

I went to the freezer on day to thaw Lizzie meat for burgers that night. It was gone. My mom refused to get cataract surgery and somehow made the whole family Lizzie’s “gross fake meat” and not one person noticed. It was funny and I told my daughter and my family and laughed that them. My dad got extremely angry at us because he always talks shit about grilling Lizzie’s burgers and calls them gross.

There was two meals that week it could have been a meatloaf or taco meat and no one noticed. My dad is calling me an asshole saying how could we be so careless and someone could have gotten sick from eating the fake meat but it’s says impossible in large letters on the packaging so it was my mom’s mistake and no one at the time said the meal tasted any different not even my picky ass father so how judgmental they are of Lizzie. Then dad refused to have the fake meat in the home because of that and instead Lizzie ate a mushroom burger but I told him I think he’s overreacting to this but he told me, I could stay in a hotel because I played a mean trick on everyone. He was grumpy with both Lizzie and I for the rest of the vacation.

I (24 f) have been involved with my fiancée (25m ) for about 7 years. We met in college and hit it off right away he has been my rock since then. I am really close to him and there is nothing I keep from him.

when we were in 2 year of college I mustered up the courage to tell him what I haven't told to anyone else in my life I was being sexually abused throughout my childhood by my father. This was really hard for me and I felt like I was going to have a panic attack. I thought that he would feel disgusted and leave me but he just hugged me and let me cry on his shoulder I felt relieved and loved after so many years of feeling lonely. with his help I started seeing a psychiatrist and for once I felt like my life had a purpose...he was my purpose. Last month he proposed and I said yes that was the happiest day of my life.

My life was perfect...well almost perfect. He has a best friend she was his childhood friend and everyone seems to want them together even his family wishes that they could be together since they know her family and her mom was best friends with his mom before she committed suicide (may her soul be in peace). I never had a problem with her since I was secure with my relationship I tried to make her my friend but she seems to have a problem with me I never wanted to make a scene so I just started avoiding her existence but she always finds a way to make back handed comments about me and my body making me look like I am some kind of prostitute which really hurts me since I had been suffering with body issues. My fiancée always makes her stop and he has cut contact before but she begged him to forgive her and she apologised to me so he forgave her giving her a second chance she stopped for a while but she would always give me a bad look whe he isn't around.

-Well Monday was his 25th birthday it was going to be hosted in his family's house and I was excited Not only because we were going to announce our engagement but to give him my birthday gift it was a watch that he was seeing for a long time I worked long hours to afford the watch and under the watch inside the box there was a sonogram of our 2 month child with "happy birthday daddy" was written on it. this was my way of telling him I was pregnant.

-Everyone was there to celebrate his birthday and Before he blew out the candles on the cake he stood up and I stood beside him facing all of his family and our friends and announced that we were engaged everyone was happy for as except his gbsf who seemed visibly upset. She kept quiet for a while and had a little too much booze to drink. His father stood up and gave a toast about how proud he was of his son and sat down.

• Girl bsf stood up after him clearly drunk she started talking about how he was such a good friend and how everyone thought that they would marry and then turned towards me and said that she was better and "at least she wasn't a sl@t who seduced her biological father and slept with him for years" when those words came out of her mouth I felt my world spinning around. I looked at my fiancée in shock he is the only person who knew about this and the fact that he betrayed me hurt like hell.

• I felt like all of the pain and hurt was pouring into my soul I stood up and held my glass and gave her a toast I told her that she was right and I atleast have a body and soul that attracted men to me unlike her and that I understood why her mom committed suicide and that I would have done the same if I had a daughter like her and I turned to my fiancée and wished him a happy 25th birthday and then I quickly grabbed my gift and got out of there he tried to follow me but I quickly got in my car and left. He has been calling and banging on my door since then but I still Don't have the energy to meet him yet.

I (22M) moved out of my dad’s house around 1.5 years ago. The deal he made with me was that I could always come back home if I was struggling too much financially (I’m a university student and also working full-time). My lease ends on September 1st and since around July, he and I have been under agreement that I can move back in with him starting in September.

Fast forward to today. He texts me out of the blue and says that his current girlfriend isn’t okay with me living there and that I’ll need to figure something else out. Her reasoning was that she didn’t want to have to hear me in the basement late at night since I get off work super late (I would’ve been quiet; the most noise would’ve been the alarm going off for 5 seconds when I opened the door). He told me this 2 weeks before my lease is up. I tried to make a case for myself and told my father that we’ve been in agreement for MONTHS that I could move back in, but he’s still refusing. I told him he just effectively made me homeless, and that if I had known sooner that I couldn’t move back in, I would’ve looked for somewhere else. He told me I needed to grow up and handle this like an adult, to figure out my own problems. As it stands, most landlords aren’t even renting out for September 1st at this point. I’ll have to find a place for October 1st.

AITA?

Basically they were doing glute bridges and had a bunch of weights laying around and when I was walking past they asked if " I could help rerack them " since they were tired. I replied " no sorry " and walked off.

They were young and capable, early 20's so In no way do they need my help, especially being two of them. If it was an older woman/man, I wouldn't hesitate and help. I felt that it was entitlement. I clean my own shit, regardless of how I feel.

My (30F) daughter’s (8F) birthday is next week and we’re planning on having a party for her and inviting around 20 other kids. I also have a stepdaughter (7F) from my marriage to my husband (38M), and she desperately wants to come. However, the thing is, she has a history of not behaving at birthday parties. She acts younger than her age and doesn’t understand social cues. She’s been invited to three of her classmates birthday parties in the past. At one of those parties, she blew out the candles, and at the other two parties, she started crying when she wasn’t able to blow out the candles. Eventually people stopped inviting her to their parties, and she claims it makes her feel left out.

I decided it would be best if my stepdaughter didn’t come. She would either blow out the candles or have a tantrum, and either way she would ruin the day for my daughter. My husband is furious with me, saying I’m deliberately excluding her for being autistic. He says she already feels excluded from her classmates parties, but excluding her from her own stepsister’s party would be even more cruel. I told him it was my daughter’s special day, and I had to prioritise her feelings first.

AITA?

I (22M) went on a trip to a theme park with my church's youth group yesterday. I’m one of the chaperones, and the kids are mostly teenagers around 13-16 years old. For the most part, they’re good kids, but they can be a bit rowdy, especially when they’re in a big group.

While we (Myself and 5/6 boys) were waiting in line for one of the rides, there was a woman standing in front of us who looked to be around my age (early 20sF). She was wearing a tank top and shorts, not even booty shorts mid thigh length, nothing outrageous, just typical summer clothes you would see in a mall clothing store. However, some of the boys in our group decided that she wasn’t dressed “modestly” enough, women in our church typically wear ankle-length skirts and sleeves to the elbow. They started clapping loudly in her ears, making comments about how she should "cover up," and even going as far as lightly touching her arm and shoulder to get her attention. One even grabbed her hips. She was visibly uncomfortable but seemed too shocked or scared to say anything.

I watched this go on for about a minute, expecting them to stop on their own, but they didn’t. It was getting worse, and I felt awful for not stepping in sooner. Finally, I snapped and told them to “fucking stop harassing her.” I didn’t yell, but I was firm and clear. They immediately looked shocked and embarrassed, and thankfully, they did stop.

Later, one of the other chaperones pulled me aside and told me I shouldn’t have used that language in front of the kids, saying it was inappropriate and not setting a good example. He said I should have found a gentler way to correct them and that I overreacted. He also reminded me that using swear words is sinful.

I don’t usually use language like that, especially around kids, but in the moment, I was more concerned with getting them to stop harassing this woman. Now I’m second-guessing myself. Maybe I could’ve handled it better, but I also feel like what they were doing was way out of line and needed to be shut down immediately. AITA for cussing at them?

Me female 28 my boyfriend male 28. So sorry if my English is bad. I live with my boyfriend he makes way more money than I do but I provided us with a house rent free cause my parents left it to me. The bills are all paid by me ,my car gas etc and the groceries from whoever goes whenever we have time. He keeps asking me how much money do you have where exactly did you spend it , and for example I treated a friend who came from London 30 dollars and he freaked out he was like why so much? He keeps saying he does it to take care of us he wants to know how much we have not only me . Why do I not ask him how much he has never and it never crosses my mind ? I feel like I am not understanding something right and he is the right one but I can't help it I keep feeling offended and I don't answer right away for example I got a coffee take away this week and I feel bad that I did he says he doesn't spent money to eat out or take a coffee to work . I am so confused I feel like I actually am the ahole but I don't get exactly how to calm down and feel better and the only thing I say when he asks is why do you ask ? And he gets mad and says I can't ask anything!

I love to read and watch stories from 1950s~ and everything beforehand.

With regard to the 1700-1800 period dramas, how the hell did people wake up and go to engagements on time? And how did servants ensure they were awake before their employers?

And I know there were alarms in the 50s, but I’ve been reading a lot of WW2 stories of prisoners waking up to attend breakfast and work on time (higher ranking jobs, with no mention of soldiers fetching them) how did these people ensure they were awake, dressed, and at work on time?

I’ve just never understood how this works, and no piece of media has ever explained it to me.

I’m 17F right now, and the middle child of my family. I’m at an age where I’m able to care for myself, but my parents take it to an absurd degree. So, just so I can pay for what I need, I have a job. However, they take half my earnings and say it’s because “they’re my parents, they deserve it”. That, plus me having to pay for my phone bill, leaves me with a rather small amount of money for me to have.

The other night, my family took me and my sisters out for dinner, since my older sister could come down from her college. We all eat, and have a generally good time until the check comes. My parents decided to pay for everybody but me. I had to pay for myself. So, naturally, I ask my parents about it. From there, the conversation escalates into a full-blown argument, which ends in them saying that I’m kicked out of the house. I say fine, and go to stay at a friend’s house for the night, hoping they didn’t mean it and will cool off by the next day.

The next day, I received a text from them saying that I needed to pick my things up from the house. I go to the house, and find all my stuff sitting on the front porch packed up. They were serious about their threat. My friend, being very nice, decided to let me stay at their house for the time being, until either I’m allowed back home, or I find someplace else.

It was also the day that I received my paycheck (it was resent since the first one bounced). When I go to get it, I find that my parents have cashed the WHOLE paycheck, not just the usual half they do. This obviously gets me more pissed off, and I go off on my parents again. They say that they’re going to disown me, which considering what they just did, makes me believe they actually will.

So AITA?

Edit for clarification: When I was young, my family was under financial stress, so me and my sister had to work to help out. They’d take cuts of our pay to help with our debts. once we were out of the situation, they continued taking cuts of my pay, but not my sister’s.

I (34F) was adopted at the age of five by a couple who, on the surface, seemed like they would provide a loving home. But from the moment I entered their house, my life became a living nightmare. They were cold, distant, and controlling, never treating me like their own. It was clear I was nothing more than a burden, a box to check for their societal image.

Throughout my childhood, I was subjected to constant verbal and emotional abuse. They’d berate me for the smallest mistakes, calling me worthless and reminding me that I should be grateful they “saved” me. I wasn’t allowed to pursue my own interests or make friends easily. Instead, they forced me into activities they thought would make them look good—piano lessons, ballet, anything that could be showcased to their friends.

My adoptive mother would often compare me to their biological daughter, who passed away before I came into their lives. She’d say things like, “She would have been perfect; why can’t you be more like her?” My adoptive father wasn’t any better, treating me like a servant rather than a daughter. I cooked, cleaned, and did chores that no child should be responsible for, all while being told I was lucky to have a roof over my head.

The day I turned 18, they kicked me out without a second thought. No goodbyes, no money, no help—just a cold “You’re an adult now, figure it out.” I was terrified, with no support system, no money, and nowhere to go. But somehow, I survived. I worked multiple jobs, put myself through college, and eventually started my own business. After years of hard work, I’ve become a successful entrepreneur. My company is thriving, and for the first time in my life, I’m truly happy and proud of myself.

Then, out of nowhere, I received a call from my adoptive parents. They’d heard about my success through mutual acquaintances and wanted to reconnect. Suddenly, they were “proud” of me and wanted to “make up for lost time.” They didn’t apologize for their past actions, didn’t acknowledge the pain they caused—they just wanted to be part of my life now that I was successful.

I told them I wasn’t interested. I have no desire to reconnect with the people who made my childhood a nightmare. But now, they’re telling everyone that I’m ungrateful, that I’ve changed, and that I’m heartless for abandoning the people who “raised” me. Some of my extended family members, who weren’t aware of the extent of the abuse, are taking their side and urging me to forgive and forget.

But how can I forget the years of torment, the sleepless nights, the tears? How can I forgive people who only want to be in my life now because of my success? I’ve built a life I’m proud of, and I don’t see why I should let them back in.

So, AITA for refusing to reconnect with my adoptive parents after everything they did to me?

I am a 29 year old female with a 10 year old son. Back in 2016 when my son was 2 my mother apparently filed a motion and was granted joint custody. I have never done drugs, never been arrested, took care of my child and have always been financially in a secure enough place to provide for a child. I have never been an unfit parent or had any type of CPS involvement. Nothing has ever deemed me unfit and I have always to my knowledge had full custody. (His father is incarcerated) she has occasionally helped baby sit while I worked. My mother has a lot of mental issues and I am in the process or buying a house and she keeps saying things to me like “he’s not living with you I have just as much legal say over him as you he’s living with me and you won’t know where my new apartment is” and other nonsense such as that. Her mental health has slowly been deteriorating these past few years so I never took it seriously until I went to court and looked at all the paperwork and she had filed a motion back in 2016 and was granted joint custody…I was NEVER present or made aware of this and surely did not sign any paperwork! How could this be possible? I’ll be demanding answers first thing Monday morning at the court house but I am so distraught over all of this. My mother is now making threats to “legally” kidnap my son because of her untreated mental illness and somehow years ago the court approved of it without my consent.

I (27F) recently lost my mother, who passed away unexpectedly. My father (55M) and I were never particularly close, but after her death, I tried to be supportive. My mother left us when I was 12, and I spent years resenting her for abandoning me. My father never spoke ill of her, only saying she "couldn't handle family life."

After her passing, I had to go through her belongings and found an old, hidden journal. In it, my mother detailed years of abuse from my father. She wrote about how he would beat her to the point where she could barely stand, screaming that she was worthless and how it was her fault for everything wrong in their lives. The last entry was the hardest to read—she explained that she left in the middle of the night because she couldn't take the abuse anymore and was too afraid for her life to stay.

Reading this shattered me. I realized that my mother didn’t abandon me because she didn’t care; she left because she was trying to survive. I couldn't believe the man I had lived with for 15 years could be so monstrous.

I confronted my father about what I found, and he didn't deny it. He just sat there, expressionless, and said, "She was weak. I was the one holding this family together."

That was the last straw. I told him that he was dead to me and that I never wanted to see him again. I cut off all contact, blocked his number, and told him he was not welcome at my wedding or any future events in my life.

Since then, my extended family has been divided. Some of them support me, saying I have every right to cut him off after what he did to my mother. But others, including my father's siblings, think I'm being too harsh. They say that people change and that my father tried his best after my mother left. They argue that cutting him out completely, especially now that he's alone, is cruel and that my mother would want us to reconcile.

I don't know what to think anymore. Am I the asshole for cutting ties with my father after finding out he was abusive to my mother? Should I consider giving him another chance, or is it okay to keep him out of my life for good?

I have a 17-year-old son who’s been streaming for a couple of years now, and he's pretty successful at it. He makes around $4,000 a month, which is more than I made at his age working part-time jobs. Honestly, I’m proud of him for finding something he enjoys and is good at, but I'm also concerned about his future. School is important, and I want to make sure he’s focused on getting good grades and planning for college or whatever he decides to do after high school. Right now, I have a rule that he can only stream for a maximum of 2 hours a day. I believe that’s enough time for him to continue doing what he loves while still keeping his priorities straight.

The problem is, my wife and son both think I’m being too strict. They argue that he’s making good money and that this could turn into a long-term career, so why not let him stream as much as he wants? I get their point, but I worry about the potential consequences if he neglects his education for streaming. The internet is unpredictable, and I don't want him to miss out on opportunities because he’s too focused on something that might not last forever. I’m not saying he has to quit streaming altogether, just that he needs to balance it with his other responsibilities.

Am I the asshole for insisting on this limit, or should I be more flexible and let him pursue this fully, even if it means risking his education? Would appreciate some outside perspectives on whether I’m being too controlling or just looking out for his best interests. Thanks.