Q&As

My name is Len, I am 102, and I am here with my grandson to answer any questions you may have about history, WW2, or life in general.

My Proof:

EDIT: 2:30 PM Central Time we are taking a break while grandpa naps, please continue to ask your wonderful questions and we will answer some more tonight!

8:15 pm central

Grandpa is tired tonight, and so am I. Thank you for your wonderful questions! If you can't find the answer you want, please leave a reply with your question, and I'll pick out some favourites for grandpa to reply to in the next couple days. Thank you so much! My grandpa says he hasn't had this much fun in a long time.

Edit: to everyone askin why, I need to know if she actually wants the car and not just buying it because my sister wants her to. I don't know her opinion at all, for all I know she doesn't want the car.

Also this is in a comment hat got downvoted to hell

I just bought myself a new car, this leaves me with an extra car which I was doing to sell back to my dealership. It’s is a Toyota Corolla 2018 which is in good condition.

My sister asked if I would be willing to sell it to my niece. She is going to college in a few months and she will needs a car. My niece ( I am going to call her Luna) has always been a social shy person. I haven’t seen her much, I just moved back to my home state

I told them I can bring it by to look at it. I get to their home and my sister and Luna were waiting. I start to show them the car and giving the basic information. I ask who will be buying it and my sister answers. She tells me that Luna is buying it and it will be in her name

So I start speaking my to her or at least trying to. Ever question I asked her, her mom would answer. For example, I asked her how much she saved up? Her mom answered. I ask how soon would she need the car? Her mom answered.

I have heard like five word the whole time I have been here and it was when she was talking to her mom. I ask if she is interested in the car and her mom answer. I told my sister I asked Luna and wait for Luna to respond. I repeat the question and she doesn’t give an answer and just looks at her mom.

I inform both of them I am not willing to sell my car if the person buying it can not communicate with me. So I ask again what she thinks of the car, she turns around and walks inside.

I informed my sister I will not be selling Luna the car. We get into an argument that I shouldn’t have put her on the spot and I know she is shy. I point out that it her daughter can not communicate and she will be eaten alive at college .

I told her I will be willing to sell it to Luna if she contacts me. My sister called me a jerk

Update: I received a call form dad ( my Bil). I don't know what is going on in that family but he made it very clear to not sell the car to anyone ( I wasn't going to anyways)

In short Luna can not afford it and they are on debt.

I don't know the specifics of what is happening so I am going to stay out of that.

I will be selling my car to the dealership

My family and I have moved states. It has been a hard move especially for my oldest daughter Katty. She is in 6th grade. The areas school district has a Facebook account that parents are a part of. I introduced myself on there a while ago.

We put katty on the cross country team and she has been making friends over the summer. I got a message from a parent last week, asking to met up and let the kids met. They would be in the same grade and I thought it would be a good opportunity.

We went yesterday at the local pool. I met Melanie and she wouldn’t make eye contact, was very soft spoken and overall didn’t seem to be paying attention. The kids were playing while I talked to the mom. She has always been in the area and was excited her kid was getting a friend.

Katty came up to me asking to leave since she wasn’t feeling well. We left early and in the car she admitted to just wanting to get away from Melanie. She explained that Melanie freaked her out. She was very touchy, kept pushing her in the water, was whispering ( saying things under her breath), would stare at people and make comments (comparing people to bugs? I am still confused on what that means) Katty told me she was uncomfortable and doesn’t want to hang out with her again.

The parent messaged me, and asked when they could do it again. I told her the girls didn’t mesh well and that we will have to decline. She then called me asking what I meant. I told her that katty wasn’t interested in hanging out since they don’t mesh together. I was trying to be polite about it.

This went on for a while and she told me that they kids just needed to be around eachother more. I told her no to that. It’s went on for a while, she asked to talk to my husband which is when I snapped.

I told her, no and that I was trying to be polite but your kid is weird. Melanie makes my kid uncomfortable and I don’t know what the hell is up with her but we will not have another play date.

She went on Facebook and it going around about how the new family are jerks. It seems to not be going anywhere, but I am wondering if I was a dick

I recently got married and wore a beautiful wedding dress that my wife custom-made for me. It means a lot to me because she put so much love and effort into it. A few weeks after the wedding, my sister, who is getting married in six months, asked if she could borrow my dress.

My sister and I have a fairly good relationship so it wasn't anything personal when I politely said no and suggested we go dress shopping together to find her something nice.

My sister was furious and called me selfish. My parents sided with her, saying I should share because we’re family. They argued that since she liked the dress so much, I should let her borrow it for one day. They called me a hypocrite for always saying I don't care for inanimate objects but still holding onto the dress like this.

Even though they pressured me, I stood my ground. The dress means a lot to me, and I want to keep it safe. Now, everyone is calling me an asshole, and my sister is barely speaking to me. I feel bad but also think I have the right to say no.

So, AITA for not lending my sister my wedding dress?

I live in a major city and earlier today I was walking down a busy street. In front of me / to the side there was a couple. The woman suddenly caught her foot on the sidewalk and started to fall toward me / in front of me, so I reflexively reached out and steadied her. It happened quickly but as far as I can recall I only touched her arm and shoulder.

Her husband or boyfriend was immediately furious with me for "touching her". I am a man. I tried to tell him it was just reflex and of course meant nothing untoward by it. He started ranting about it being unacceptable and I ought to know better than to touch a muslim woman. She had been wearing a headscarf, if that matters.

I got a bit defensive and asked him if he'd prefer I just let her fall to the pavement. I asked her if she was okay but he just scoffed and led her away. She never said anything and I left the interaction feeling bad for her. I hope I didn't put her into a bad situation.

I know anecdotally that in muslim culture men are not supposed to touch women, but I saw someone falling and acted on instinct. I didn't consider any sort of cultural norms in that moment. This happened in Canada, the norm here would be to help if you can.

AITA?

EDIT: I've been reading replies and I should clarify, the man wasn't just letting her fall or failing to act. This all happened in an instant, by the time he turned (in response to her tripping) I'd already stepped in. Steadying her himself would not have been possible: I was facing toward her and saw it happen, so I could react. He was facing forward, with no time to react.

Judge how you will, but to claim he was just prepared to stand there and watch her fall without trying to intervene himself isn't accurate.

This whole thing is so weird. I, (27M), am gay. I came out at 16 and my parents told me they would always love me, but to not mention it to my older brother who I'll call Brick, (then 19M, 30M now). When I was confused and asked why, they said that Brick had expressed some awful opinions about gay people. I limited talking to Brick until I moved out at 18, which wasn't much of a problem because we were never close.

I went to uni, got good job, and an awesome boyfriend (28M), in my home city. Me and my boyfriend Angel live a peaceful life. Peaceful until a few days ago when I got a call from my brother. I was concerned that Brick was calling me, as we have never messaged before, just had each other's numbers for emergency purposes. I picked up because maybe there was some emergency happening.

He opened the call with an annoyed "hey man" and I knew something was up. He said he was getting married to his fiance Yen (24F) next year. I didn't even know he had a girlfriend! I was like "that's great Brick!" and asked some boring wedding things that he begrudgingly answered. He then told me invites were being sent out in a couple weeks, and that I could bring a plus one. Here's where I made the mistake that started this mess. Without thinking like an idiot, I said, "cool, I'll bring my boyfriend." Major. Mess up. Brick immediately started yelling insults down the line, screaming that he "wouldn't have an [f slur] at his wedding." I didn't say anything and just hung up. I was rattled by hearing those words from my own brother's mouth, even though I knew his feelings about people like me. I told Angel, and he comforted me, ordering in my favourite restaurant and watching movies with me, which was awesome. We went to bed later and I felt alright the next day.

I sent my parents a message that Brick invited me and uninvited me from his wedding pretty much in the same breath, and went on my way to work, not a clue of the crapstorm waiting for me when I got off. When I turned my phone on again after my shift, it was blowing UP. Messages and calls from my parents and relatives galore asking me what the f happened? I phoned my parents back when I got home and gave them the run down of what happened, and said I honestly didn't care because it's not like Brick would be coming to my wedding anyways. My parents immediately chastised me for my "obvious disinterest and disregard of my brother's life" and told me I should be apologizing to HIM for bringing my personal life into his wedding. WHAT? I basically told my parents to screw off and have been getting bombarded with messages from relatives to apologize to my brother and get my invite reinstated, and apologize to my parents for disrespecting them, but I really don't want to. Angel's reassuring me that I did nothing wrong, but it's still nagging me. AITA?

[Throwaway account & several details modified for privacy reasons]

Some background first:

Two years ago, I had some friends and family over for a small barbecue, including my brother's new girlfriend (I'll call her Missy), who I hadn't met yet at that point. At some point during the afternoon, Missy came up to me and said that she noticed that my DVD collection included a copy of Bill Cosby "Himself" (for those who aren't familiar, this was a ~90 minute stand-up special that came out in 1983, and for a long time was considered one of the best stand-up specials ever).

I explained that the DVD had been my dad's and had sentimental value. I went on to say that my dad and I had watched that special together multiple times, first on VHS and later on DVD, and our mutual love of stand-up comedy was something that we bonded over.

A couple hours later, I was cleaning up in the kitchen, and I noticed my Cosby DVD sitting in the garbage can. When I confronted Missy about it, she said that all of Cosby's old material should be destroyed, and accused me of being a "rapist enabler and apologist".

I told her that regardless of her opinion, she didn't get to destroy my personal property because she found it offensive, and told her she was no longer welcome in my home. She stormed out in a huff and my mom and step-dad had to give my brother a ride home.

She and my brother are still together, and we are coldly polite when we see each other at family occasions held at other locations. She has never apologized to me and as far as I'm concerned, she's still not welcome in my home.

Current Day:

Two weeks ago, my brother proposed to Missy. My mom called me and asked if she could host an engagement party at my house, since I have much more space (my mom and step-dad live in a small condo, and my brother and Missy live in an apartment, and I own a house with a back yard).

I told my mom, no, they can't have the party at my place, as Missy isn't welcome in my home and never will be.

Well, that opened a shit-storm of complaints and insults from all sides; my family, and her family and friends all jumped on me with both feet, bitching about how I should get over my hurt feelings and "be the bigger person".

So AITAH?

Edit - I got a bit more information from a mutual acquaintance after my original post. Missy's side of the story, that she has apparently been telling to all of her friends and family since the incident occurred is: she pointed out Cosby's reputation to me, and we argued about it. I supposedly threw her out of my house because she insulted my favorite comedian, and I've been holding a grudge ever since.

Edit 2 - It's common knowledge in my family that I have a temper and tend to hold grudges (I still bust my brother's chops about the time he tore up several of my comic books when I was 9 and he was 5). Nobody else witnessed the confrontation between Missy and me; they just heard us shouting at each other for a minute or two, then she stormed out.

I'm sure that she told my brother some variation of the story that she told everyone else, so I guess my brother believed her version of what happened. Up till now, I've kept my mouth shut about Missy because I didn't want to come across like I was trying to drive a wedge between her and my brother.

When the subject of family occasions came up, I just declined to host it at my place, so my boundary or the specific reason why I dislike her didn't come up.

For the goddamn life of me I can’t get my post to link but I’m sure if you’re reading this it’s because you’ve already read my original post. If someone would link it in the comments I’d greatly appreciate it!

Thank you to everyone for being so supportive and offering advice. To those who suggested getting a security system in place, we are going to do that but the house is not in a place where a security system can be installed. For the time being we’re looking into getting some battery power trail cameras as suggested by one Redditor (I can’t find your comment in the sea anymore but you know who you are!) We don’t have to worry about internet access and they won’t be in the way of renovations. We are restoring the house back to its original glory, pre carpeted bathrooms and mismatched wallpaper. Besides fixing broken shit and upgrading old appliances we’ll be having the floors redone, paint, wallpaper, new windows, and opening up some walls that shouldn’t be there.

For the next two weeks my wife and I will be meeting with people coming out to work on electricity, plumbing, and a few other things and we do have a consultation with a home security company. Along with cameras we’re looking to get alarms and door codes and set up an access gate around the property. One of those that needs either a passcode or to be let in by someone in the house. We’ve already made an appointment to have the locks changed and aren’t concerned about my family trying to squat there. My in-laws have allowed us to park their camper trailer on the property while work is being done not only for peace of mind but to avoid commuting back and forth multiple times daily.

For the actual update. I was hesitant to post this update since it’s so soon after my original post but I guess enough has happened for it to be useful information. The events of the bbq took place last week but I only got around to writing it all out yesterday.

I sent a message to my parents and siblings yesterday evening asking to meet up to talk things through and try and figure out what’s wrong and what exactly the hell is happening. Earlier today my wife and I met my parents and my brother’s family at his house before my sister arrived. I let them know that if they tried to interrupt or control the conversation we would leave. I told them that I never once even suggested my sister would be allowed to rent out the house or buy it from us. That u didn’t know where she got the idea from, and showed them the text strings where I first sent her the listing and every conversation where I updated her on the progress.

My mom asked to see the rest of the conversations about the house and I told her there were none. She informed me that my sister told them all that we had made an agreement that my wife and I would purchase it and then rent it out to my wife’s family until they’d paid enough to buy it. That we would live in the guest house and they’d get the main house. She told them that we had went back on our deal and had “absolutely shattered her dreams of raising her kids in the house she grew up in”.

We gave our side and it wasn’t difficult at all to convince my parents that we were telling the truth. With the lack of evidence on my sisters part and absolutely no legal documentation my parents didn’t even attempt to try and back up what she told them.

My parents were very apologetic and let us know that they never would have said those things to us had they known the truth and that they supported us 100%. My brother was supportive of us as well but he was never one of the people harassing us over this so his reaction is less important. Around then my sister and her husband showed up. My BIL is a doormat and will give my sister whatever she wants so I wasn’t expecting much from him.

I asked her to produce any of the necessary evidence to prove that I told her we’d rent the house out to her. That her lie was ill conceived and that she better have a good explanation. She attempted to suggest that i had deleted the conversation but when she couldn’t produce said messages either her story fell apart.

She started crying, saying it wasn’t fair that we “got everything handed to us” and that we “didn’t need a house this big” and that we were rubbing our wealth in her face. So to my understanding she thought she could trick everyone into bullying us into renting our house out to her? I guess? Like some kind of fucked in the head Scooby Doo villain? Instead of using ghosts to scare us away she’s using a fake rental agreement that she didn’t even attempt to make look or sound legit.

We let her know that she had a lot of apologizing to do before we’d consider having a relationship with her moving forward and that she wouldn’t be welcome in our home for a long time.

At the moment our relationship with my parents is rocky at best, for obvious reasons. They let us know that they’re here to support us if we need moving assistance or help with renovations but it’ll take some good hard thinking to decide if we’re okay with that. We will not be giving anyone in my family a spare key but my wife’s parents will receive one for emergencies. The house won’t be in a state to host guests for a bit so we are choosing to cross the “can my family be trusted at our home” bridge when we come to it.

To answer some common questions I’ve noticed in the comments. My sister obviously has some screws loose but my parents don’t really coddle her. She’s what you can consider the golden child (and the baby) but honestly most of her antics up until this point were just one upping achievements during our childhood or seeking more attention from our parents. She’s dramatic, entitled, and a little selfish but has never displayed this level of crazy before.

Yes we will get a security system but not for a bit. No my family will not be trusted with a key. Yes I am a woman. I know it’s crazy how can two women be married lol. My wife and I do not have kids and will not have them in the future. My sister has done some odd things but nothing as absolutely absurd as this. We will be meeting with an estate planner to put everything into writing. We plan on leaving the property to my SIL and her kids with my MIL as the executor of our estate for the time being. My sister and her family rent a small house in town. They aren’t struggling per se, they each are college educated with good jobs but children are expensive and then adding in student debt and $2,000 a month in rent and you aren’t exactly living it up.

Also there’s a surprising amount of people mad at my wife and I for being rich? We are not wealthy. My in laws are comfortable and are generous enough to allow us to occupy their rental at no charge. They bought a new house decades ago and just didn’t sell their previous one. So they allowed my wife to live there. The down payment was my wife’s college fund from years ago. Her parents put money in it but when she decided to go into a trade they kept the money and saved it specifically for the purpose of a down payment. When we told them that the house was up for sale finally they offered the college fund they had kept for her. We work good paying jobs but were able to save so much because we didn’t have to pay 2 grand a month for housing. We did skimp and save and we did damn well earn it. We lived below our means and spent years forgoing any kind of luxuries to afford something we wanted.

So yeah, not as drama filled as a lot of people were expecting or hoping. I don’t see this as the end of it, not at all, but for the time being my wife and I are focusing on dealing with our new house and not my sister. She’s blocked on both our phones as of this morning and I’m not sure when I plan on unblocking her.

My son isn't back in school yet but I was contacted by his teacher for next grade asking if I had bought him all the required items and to inquire about any donated class supplies. While we were talking I told her that I had labeled my son's supplies and do not want him forced to share those with his stepsister (not my stepchild, my ex's). I also made it clear I was not counting the donated class supplies I'd be giving but just my son's personal ones. Last grade it was a constant issue and the teacher ignored me because it wasn't stated at the start of the year. So I got ahead this year.

His teacher said she made a note of it and wouldn't make him share.

My ex and his wife were contacted also. Her about her two kids (daughter and a younger son).. Him about our son. His wife apparently told the teacher her daughters supplies would be shared by my son and she corrected them and said she must have his own because class supplies can't substitute him the entire year.

This was followed by my ex calling to say they can't afford to do this shit. He said it was bad enough finding stuff for the kids to use when my son was leaving his supplies in the cubby at school so they couldn't be used by all the kids. But now the school is saying they can't be divided between the two kids and that I'm a selfish bitch for that. He said they're family and it shouldn't be this big of an issue. I told him I was not responsible for providing for his stepkids. That if they can't afford them then it's not my problem. He told me his stepdaughter will suffer and I told him I do not care. It's not my job to make sure she and her brother are provided for and I told him that I ended up spending way more than expected on supplies last year when our son was forced to share.

Ex's wife reached out and told me I should be ashamed, I should be more willing to let the sharing happening, they're siblings and belong to the same family, innocent child. I told her that if she cannot afford to buy her kids supplies she should find their dads and ask. Not expecting me, who has nothing to do with her kids, to support them.

For context my son is 8, his stepsister is also 8 or literally about to turn 8 and his stepbrother is 5/6. My son wasn't willingly sharing the supplies. He was forced to by his teacher and he hated it because she did ruin some of his best supplies, especially crayons and color pencils but also his sharpener. I don't think it was intentional. It seems like she's just a rougher kid with stuff.

Ex and his wife say I'm an ass and should feel so ashamed for willingly letting a child in the family suffer and for being petty about school supplies.

AITA?

Does the design aid female athletic performance? I can’t imagine all of those athletes are comfortable with the world seeing 50% of their bum in all its glory. If it’s a performance thing, why don’t the males wear something similar?

Please be kind. I'm a mess. I'm 36F. And I have been married to "Joey" 44M for 3 years, together for 5. I came in to the relationship with 3 kids of my own. They are 6yo boy, 8yo boy and 13yo girl. My husband also has 3 kids. 17yo boy, 19yo girl and 20yo girl.

These past 8 months have been some of the hardest times I've ever endured. My dad died early December and it slammed me hard. I'm an only child with no surviving close relatives so the funeral cost was up to me. And unfortunately, I inherited debt. I tried to get it cleared but it cost an arm and a leg in lawyer fees and at the end, I still owed close to $36k. I was just starting to get back to a stable financial position in May, when my mom died and this one just broke me. My mom was my rock, my best friend. I didn't inherit any debt, thankfully, but I was in charge of funeral costs again. I got a lot of help from the community thankfully but in the end I still had to pay nearly $3800 out of pocket. Given that I was already in a rough financial position, this really hurt the household. Thank God for my children's father. Because if it wasn't for him really shouldering most of the children's expenses during this time, they'd have nothing. And unfortunately, I wasn't strong enough to go back to work immediately following the death of my mom. I became a walking shell of a person. It took everything out of me to just get out of bed. Despite not being able to afford it, I was out of work for a month. It was my fault. I wasn't strong enough. I'm back to work now. But I'm going to food banks just to feed us.

Joeys 20yo daughter knows what type of position we are in. She has seen us struggling. She has seen me in the middle of meltdowns. But when I woke up from an afternoon nap yesterday and walked out in to our kitchen, I found my 20yo step daughter in my kitchen cooking her 2 children (3.5 and 2) the kielbasa and rice that I had prepped and sitting in the fridge for dinner that night. I asked her what in the world she was doing feeding her kids the literal last of the food I had in my home and she shrugs and said "well my kids were hungry". I told her my kids were hungry too and that was the last of the food I had here to feed them. She raises her eyebrows, says "okay?" And continues to dish out plates for her kids. I guess the last piece of me just broke. I snapped. I told her to get out of my home immediately and said she wasn't welcome back here. Joey came out after hearing the commotion and asked what was going on, so I told him that his daughter was feeding the last of our food to her daughter's and that I now had no idea how I was going to feed my kids and that she needed to leave and not come back. Joey took his daughters side. Said that I was being ridiculous and that if his grandchildren are hungry than they are allowed to eat. I told them both that those kids should have ate at their own house before coming here and again told my step daughter to leave. Joey tells me if his daughter isn't welcome here than neither is he, so he left too.

I have been getting text after text from both Joey and his daughter, stating that I "traumatized" those little girls and how they supposedly won't eat without looking over their shoulder and Joey has told me he wants a divorce, which I will happily give him. But I am admittedly so filled with anger and grief and guilt that I am having a hard time grasping whether or not I am in the wrong for what I did. AITA? (My kids did eat, their dad came over and cooked them a meal)

I’m not sure if this is the right place for this but tonight I (24M) was on a second date with a nice girl (22F) who still lives with her mother. We ended up staying up late together and falling asleep for a little, that is until I woke up to my door flying open, 3 flashlights in my face and a voice yelling “LAPD!” I immediately get out of bed, still dazed, confused, half asleep, not even realizing that this woman is still in my bed. They ask and confirm my identity, ask if my date is in my room with me which I confirm, and then they tell me her mom is downstairs waiting for her because she got worried about her not answering her phone. I walk my date out to find 3 more police officers waiting for us, so 6 total. Not one word was spoken to me. Feels a bit extra for the situation especially given the reality of us just having fell asleep. I, as far as I’m concerned, have a squeaky clean record too. No reason for concern that I would’ve done something horrible to this woman. Can I report this at all? Was this legal?

I (26F) have been with my fiancé (30M) for 4 years, and we were planning to get married next year. My ex lost his job during Covid (in late 2021) and hasn't gotten a new one yet and I have been supporting him. He used to live in my apartment. A few months ago, I found out I was pregnant. We were both excited and nervous, but unfortunately, I had a miscarriage at 10 weeks. It was devastating, and we were both heartbroken, at least I was.

About two weeks ago, I found out that my fiancé has been cheating on me with my sister (28F). I discovered this through a series of texts and photos on his phone, he had sent her nude photos and she had sent pictures in lingerie. My sister and I were never super close, but this betrayal cut deep. I confronted both of them, and they admitted to having an affair for the past year. They said they didn't mean for it to happen and that it just "got out of hand" but that they loved each other, my ex had the audacity to ask for an open relationship after I confronted them.

In the heat of the moment, during the emotional argument with my fiancé, I told him that I was glad I had a miscarriage because at least now I don't have to be tied to him for the rest of my life and that I wouldn't have a son that could grow into an unemployed failure of a scumbag like him. I know it was a horrible thing to say, but I was in so much pain and anger.

My fiancé was furious and said that I was being cruel and heartless. My sister also chimed in, saying that I had no right to talk about the baby like that and that my ex-fiance wasn't a failure, just having a hard time. My parents are devastated by the whole situation and are trying to stay neutral, but I can tell they are disappointed in all of us.

I know I shouldn't have said what I did, but part of me feels that it's the truth and I was in the right to knock him down a peg. AITA?

To be frank I'm having a bit of a mental collapse and I want to disappear. Temporarily mind (say a week or two) not forever.

Say you wanted to go off grid for a bit, without a passport or a driver's license? Where would you go? What would you do?

I've thought about just packing up a tent and such and doing some wild camping somewhere but haven't a clue where. I know that's probably a bit of a romantic view of how that'd turn out and I'd get quite bored rather quickly if I didn't die of exposure first but I don't really give much of a toss right now.

P.s. please don't bother with reddit cares, I already have a therapist. Cheers.