Q&As

A few days ago, I 23F was supposed to pick up my little sister 7F (whom I have sole custody of) but my Aunt 32F overstepped and said she would pick her up and drop her off to me. She took 45 minutes to do so although, I live 10mins away and was only 5 away from pickup. Fast forward to the next day, my little sister informs me that while she was with our Aunt, she saw our estranged mother whom is only allowed to be seen during supervised visits with CPS only. I texted my Aunt and asked her if it were true. She began telling me there was “no need for me to tell you because that is her mom” and she began attacking me verbally. She said she isn’t wrong for hiding it, she invalidated how I felt, she disregarded how crucial it is for me to know these things.

The rest of my family also began to text me. My grandma even took her side. I told them that they have lost access for not understanding the sacrifices I’ve made for my sister, not understanding that I’ve committed the rest of my life to this & not respecting my wishes.

AITA?

I have 3 kids F13 M9 F1.

Recently we went to a birthday party and there were many other kids around. One of the kids was my cousin's daughter F4 who is a very bratty kid.

My cousin's daughter was playing with my youngest and slapped her which made her cry. I ran to hug her and looked at my cousin to see what she is gonna do and she simply laughed and said "Kids will be kids. It was just a slap. She will be fine" As soon as she said that and before I could say anything my older kids raised their hands and slapped her, hard, on both sides of face. She fell on the ground and started to cry.

My cousin looked at me with wide eyes and said "WTF is wrong with your kids? Why would they do that?" And I just shrugged and said "I don't know, kids will be kids I guess." She called me an asshole and has been telling people I allowed my "teenagers" to bully her toddler.

I have never wanted kids. I was forced to watch my younger siblings (4 of them) until I left at the age of 16. I greatly dislike babysitting and never had my own children. Never have been comfortable around young kids after that.

My husband has three children, I met and married him when his kids were in their 20s. I am not a mother figure to them at all, just their dad’s wife. Overall I got along well with the three adults.

The problem started when my Kelly became pregnant. Everyone was excited for the first baby in the family. I made it clear I didn’t want to babysit and when grandkids were around my husband was to be the main caretaker. My husband agreed.

The first two years went great, my husband is an awesome grandpa and I am fine being the relative that brings toys and other fun stuff once in a while.

Kelly has been pushing hard for me to take up a more traditional grandma role. Her MIL isn’t involved ( she lives a few states over). Kelly has gotten in her head that I should be doing the babysitting instead of her father. We have talked to her multiple times.

My husband is on a work trip and will be back next week. Usually he babysits on Monday but he informed her that he won’t be there so it was canceled. She stopped over and was dropping her kids off.

I asked what she was doing since her dad wasn’t here. She told me that I need to step up and babysit. That she doesn’t care if her dad isn’t here, I am present. I told her no.

This went in circles for a bit and got more heated the longer we went. I told her I don’t want to watch any fixing kids and that includes yours. She is pissed.

My husband is fine with what I did but his other children are on his ass.

So AITA?

For content I (30F) and my husband (30M) are having a baby I’m 8 an a half months pregnant currently so I am not working for obvious reasons. But in my job I earn significantly more than my husband. My husband works at a small company and I really get on with most of his co workers apart from one his “work wife” (24F) I put work wife in quotes as he does not call her this despite her desperately trying to get this title. She has degraded me to him before her main complaint being (when I was working) I work too much and am clearly trying to emasculate him. Which he very quickly shut down. Now I’m pregnant and not working she’s voiced concern to him that I “look to thin for a pregnant woman” (I am a healthy weight) she’s just a larger women and I assume while not trying to be to egotistical that she felt a bit jealous probably hoping that I would get bigger then her during pregnancy. And her other concern being that I’m too old to be pregnant. She’s done both of these in creepy subtle ways as to not look like the outright bad guy. Anyway on to the incident my husband’s boss was having a garden party to which I was invited during this event my husband was having a glass of gin and tonic (one of my favourite drinks) he remarked to me that it was particularly good I took his glass to take a small sip. I could see “work wife’s” beady eyes on me as I handed the glass back. She then came rushing up to us to tell me about the dangers of fetal alcohol syndrome I explained I just had a small sip and it’s really no harm at all. But this wasn’t enough for her to just leave it she continued to go on about how “worried” she is to which my husband defended me repeating that I only had a tiny bit and there really is no harm there. She seemed to be offended by this response and turned to me and said if I want to kill my baby I should just have an abortion my husband and those in ear shot where stunned by this before I could think about what to do I instantly told her to fuck off and mind her own business luckily no one heard and she sort of just looked uncomfortable and left shortly afterwards. Following this very mild response in my opinion and in the opinion of my husband and others I’ve told she has sent my husband 7 emails calling me and him every name imaginable tried to call 40+ times leaving a variety of insane voicemails. My husband has reported this to HR and she resigned shortly after. Despite this she won’t stop calling and leaving abusive messages we’ve tried blocking her but she just makes new account. Her persistence makes me worried for her mental wellbeing and I feel like a bit of an asshole for pushing this clearly disturbed women over the edge AITA?

Update- I am going to file a report tomorrow to the relevant authorities and both me and my husband will be changing our numbers. I do not believe this woman is any real danger to anyone but herself and would like her to be sectioned in some way to get the mental health treatment that she needs. Also thank you all for the supportive comments as I felt a bit overwhelmed by the situation and me and husband were a bit lost and unsure on what exactly to do. Also to clear a small point up she didn’t really resign it’s sort of a formality not sure if this is specific to the uk that you don’t get fired you get asked to leave then you have to resign.

Edit- to clarify this post is not AITA for having a sip of watered down gin and tonic. I respect different people having different opinions but no child has ever gotten FAS from a sip of a not very strong drink. I probably consumed the same amount of alcohol in that sip as I do when I accidentally swallow a bit of my mouth wash

Ok this is happening right now. I'm in the wedding venue watching my sister get married. So expect updates maybe??

I F(17) am at my sister's wedding right now (I'm so happy for her!). Here's the problem, this random guest (who I don't know) is wearing the very beautiful very obvious wedding gown to what's supposed to be my sister's special day.

Back when I was younger and she was a teen she told me that if she got married and someone wore white to my wedding she wanted me to spill a gallon of syrup and glitter on her as payback. Now the only unfortunate part is that I have no access to syrup or or glitter. You might be thinking wine because that's the most commonly used weapon in these situations but they won't let me near the alcohol table. The only drinks available to the 5 children hear is sprite, orange juice, and water (great selection guys...). Now I would do orange juice but there is very little left and my cousin would murder me.

So what to do? I'm pretty sure everyone here has noticed the white dress and is a tad confused by it. My whole family and the grooms side aren't big tradition followers so you basically could wear anything to this wedding and not be directly called out. However, this seems very deliberate and I know my sister has noticed it because how the hell would you not?!

So AITAH? Honestly just tell me what to do cuz idk. I might go talk to her; I love talking to crazy people!

(Also don't come at me for making an AITAH post about something so stupid cuz I find this hilarious).

UPDATE:

So I want to make it clear that I am very much a gentle giant and would never do something so bold. Me and my cousin thought this would be pretty funny to see what other people thought. Now I finally spoke to my sister and her husband. My sister actually didn't notice her and got pretty upset when I pointed it out (I feel kind of bad about that). I asked her if she knew the person to which she said no then ask her husband if he did and he said it was his cousin's plus one and gf. I asked her if she wanted me to do anything about it and she told me yes but also to not make a big scene out of it. So one things I'm pretty good at is info-fishing! I sidled my way up to the guest with my little cousin (not the same cousin as before) and started some small talk with the guests around her which eventually lead to her being brought into the conversation. Now my little cousin is blunt and childish (which is why I brought his amazing self along) and asks why she has the white dress on (as planned). She stutters a little then mumbles something about her being color blind.

Ok! Pause. What? I've heard of color blindness where you can't see anything but black or white and if ima be honest I kind of just walked away after that. Like, how do I respond to that? cuz if she's actually color blind and thought the dress was a light shade of some color or other than I'm the AH and she doesn't deserve me bitching about it, yk? Then again, if she's lying that's freaking crazy. I basically just told my sister that and gave me the most 'wtf?' Face she could manage. She decided not to worry about it and just have a happy wedding! I'm happy for her and honestly just happy she's such a great person and so much better than me lol.

UPDATE 2: So me an my cousin have decided that we were the AH and we accept it. It would have been worse if we acted on the joke however. The woman has left and her Bf is no where to be seen so all is well. Me and my cousin brought the post up to my sister (who was a bit tipsy so I'll ask again later) and asked if we should delete since it was unkind of us to do it at her wedding. She laughed at us after reading the post (and a few comments) and told us we were fine and also hilarious. I'm glad my sister is happy and when my sister is happy I'm happy! Let's just celebrate that my sister got married!!! WOOOO GO SISTER!!! Sure I'm just a 17 y/o and acting childish but you bet your ass that I'll live out my last year of childhood acting like the biggest toddler of all.

I love you sis ❤️

Me and my husband and I picked out baby names almost 5 years ago, and when we started trying, he told his family and mine about our journey. During this conversation, we both told the names we had chosen to the family as using these names is our goal. They have heard these names multiple times through our journey because it has been what keeps us motivated when it gets hard. We will sit and picture our future with our son or daughter, and the names have never changed up. These names have been our dreams. Everyone knows and has heard it.

My husband's sister ended up pregnant with her boyfriend, who doesn't like us because we helped her leave him, and then they got back together. When I heard I had a gut feeling, something was going to happen. At her gender reveal, she learned she is having a boy. We celebrated, and everything was going smoothly until my mil and fil were at a table with me, and someone brought up her baby names. Mil seemed hesitant and told me two names she was thinking of and then Fil said and her bf likes insert our baby name and they will call him insert our shortened baby name we planned on using. I was shocked but remained smiling and said something like, "That is our baby name..." and Mil popped up that my husband's aunt had mentioned that was our baby name. I was shocked, but my husband had come over to let me know we needed to leave for dinner with my parents. I get up and while getting all our stuff my sil runs into me and during our brief conversation I mention I heard her baby names and named them off along with mentioning that the one her bf wanted was our baby name and she acted like she didn't know that was our name. I told her it was and then said goodbye, and we left.

My husband knew something was wrong, and I told him what had happened in the car. His immediate response was that I'd cut them off. We have been struggling to have a baby, and it's been hard on him. We had a positive and then lost the baby, but he was sure it was a boy, and he was so excited to use our name. I knew this hit him hard, but I don't want any drama on his side of the family. So I told him we would talk about it later and we went to dinner.

After dinner on the way home he brought it back up and said he was mad and felt like her trying to use our name was a slap in the face and like they thought we would never have a baby. We both cried together on the way home.

Once we got home we sat in silence until he randomly said Fuck them. We are using our sons name whether they do or not. It doesn't change the name we have chosen and pictured for years. I mention it will cause issues for everyone if they have the same name and go by the same name along with his family would probably try to call him by his middle name to keep them separate. He said anyone that calls our future son anything other than what he goes by wont be around. I told him okay I'm with you on this.

A couple days later I spoke with Sil when she pulled me aside at another get together. Her and her bf said they hope there is no hard feelings if they use insert our full baby name. I was shocked and asked if they were serious. They both nodded. I replied " So you don't just want the first name you want our entire baby name? First and middle?" Sil said yes she had forgotten our baby name and her bf really liked the first name and the middle is a alternative version of her family name. I said "it's an alternative version because me and your brother wanted to use a family name from his side and I wanted unique. It's literally an alternative version of his middle name. That name has meaning to us it's not just a name. It's sentimental especially to your brother. Also there is no way you forgot our baby name we talked about less than 2 weeks before your gender reveal." She huffed and said she did and she is sorry but she is pregnant now and will be using that name. So I said " That's fine. So will we. When we have a son no matter what you name yours he will be named insert name. Even if I can't have a child naturally in the next year and a half we plan on adopting. The name will be used and we will be parents. If you want to struggle with our kids having the same name other than their last that's on you." She told me that isn't how it will work and that she plans on using her last name since her bf is adopted he will be taking her last name when they get married. I froze and said thats fine it won't be changing my child's name either way. She started crying and said she thought I was her sister and cared about her. I told her she is and I do, but what she is doing is hurting her brother and I really bad but we both know we can't stop her from using our name but I can and will be using it either way. She huffed and walked off. We haven't spoken since so am I the asshole?

CLARIFY:

1. She wants to use the full name, first middle, and last. She said it was because bf is adopted and hates his last name.

2. She is in an abusive relationship with a bf. They had broken up and me and my husband and I drove states away to pick her up. He moved back to try to work it out, and she found out she was expecting. I'm not sure how it stands now, but they both don't have jobs and are living with her parents. Her parents don't want to kick him out or push too hard because she has moved out with him before because of it and especially since she is expecting.

3. I have NEVER been upset that she is pregnant. I'm happy for her. The only time I get upset hearing someone is expecting is if they already haven't been great parents. Example: Friends sister had her third baby a couple of months ago, and she was born addicted to meth. This is the third child taken from her. That upset me. Kids don't deserve that.

4. My husband's family is close, like, REALLY close. They used to do family meetings monthly before covid and everyone moving away. It took some getting used to, but I opened up. We were trying for 6 months before they caught me buying pregnancy tests. We sat down and explained our journey. We aren't the only couple in the family to go through this and talk with the women, getting advice and sharing what our therapist wanted us to do helped. During these conversations, of course, names were brought up. I've never been around a situation like this and wouldn't have a problem if it was one part of the name, but the ENTIRE name, especially something so unique, is irritating and hurtful. I know you can't call dibs. However, I believe there should be respect for the process.

5. If we adopt, we are looking at an adoption agency that helps teen moms specifically that works in our state. So we would be adopting an infant. I would never change a child's name stripping identity. I have adopted siblings, and it's been a big discussion most of my life. We've talked about adopting older, and we may go that route eventually because we do want more than one child, but my husband wants to be there from the start. We have helped raise my 3 nieces and though I've been there since day one he wasn't and he loves them to death but due to some complicated legal stuff and the biological parents choice rights were signed over to my parents. We get them weekly, but we want kids that are ours.

I see it in movies and tv shows all the time, paramedics pleading for the victim to "stay awake and keep your eyes open."

What happens if we close our eyes? Do we die when they close? Is it hard to keep your eyes open?

( first post)

My inbox got flooded with DMs and had to turn off Reddit notifications. When I posted this, I was ready to be called immature and ridiculous, and get a couple of comments but it seemed like the post blew up, and the comments were...…kind of eye-opening.

TBH, before all this fiasco, my bf has always been nice to me. Came with me to my grad school functions even though he found them very boring, but would do it so that I could network. He builds stuff like furniture and helps out with handy work all the time. He is also very funny and at the very beginning, I thought all his jokes were funny, and I sometimes wondered why he wanted to be with me, plus, I was always busy with school and job interviews. His mom and I had even gotten close and she has been saying how happy she was that we were together. I had always ignored his and Claire's weird dynamic because I told myself I was being insecure. I have male friends too, and I thought that just because we aren't like that, doesn't mean my bf and Claire can't be close. Claire has also never been outright mean to me, she was just aloof and I thought it was because I was new to the group.

To the actual update, my bf and I broke up. I'm sorry guys, but even after seeing so many replies on how he was cheating, I refused to believe it. I'm still in love with this guy. And he called me, like half a day after I wrote this post, and asked to meet. I met him, and he said that he understood where I was coming from. But I was always too uptight to understand that friendship is friendship. He and Claire had known each other for years before I came into the picture, and I cannot expect him to just ruin their dynamic. I asked him what sort of 'dynamic' was red lingerie. Why couldn't it be literally any other type of clothing? He told me he had it with my insecurities. And that he and Claire talked and apparently I was making them sound like cheaters and homewreckers. And that he thought it was better I find someone like me, who thought the idea of a fun night was junk food and a movie indoors.

That hurt a lot. He had always known I had insecurities about being called boring. He always complimented me on how his weaknesses were my strengths. Now he says things like this to me? Also, before this lingerie fiasco, I had never said a word about his and Claire's friendship. I always supported his pranks and practical jokes no matter my opinions on them because I thought it was his business what he did with his hobbies. And he leaves without even putting up a fight because his girlfriend didn't want him giving lingerie to the woman he constantly refers to as his 'sexy' bestie?

Claire didn't call or text after the breakup either. But Kyle did and said that he was sad that we broke up and he hoped I would be okay in the future. I asked him if my bf ever cheated on me. He said that my bf had only been a 'one woman man' when he was dating me. But he could understand that some women can't handle female best friends, especially if they look like Claire. I told him to fuck off and blocked him. It felt like he only wanted to gloat and hurt me because my bf left. I feel like I never knew these people. Claire and Kyle were always at least decent to me if not nice. Did it make me a free target now that my bf has been telling his friends I'm an insecure child?

I don't know what to do now. I have been told repeatedly by both my friends and sister that I dodged a bullet. But I have been breaking down like a kid again and again. I'm even thinking of going to therapy, after feeling the most insecure I've felt my whole life.

Thank you to all who were supportive, it seems like my now ex-bf just did the work for me.

When I was 19 (m) my grandparents and parents introduced me to Amy (then 20) and it was expected that we would date and marry. I wasn't at all interested but after a full year of "advice" and "pushing" I agreed. I tried getting Amy to reject me since I don't think she wanted to marry me either. But she never once tried to make our relationship work and neither did she ever say no to going on "dates" or the "proposal" or the marriage.

We literally still lived with our respective parents. But on paper we were husband and wife. I left for university in a different state and sort of went crazy. Parties, drinking, flirting you name it. I did it all. I was doing good in my studies so my family never got suspicious. But Amy did find out eventually that I was sleeping around and complained to my parents. As punishment, in the middle of the semester they decided to no longer pay for my university and that I was on my own.

I stopped talking with Amy and my grandparents. I saw them whenever I went home for holidays and sat through more lectures but I was free the rest of the year so whatever. I was determined to divorce Amy as soon as I was able to afford a real lawyer.

During this time I met Jane. We fell in love and she knew my whole life story and situation but she chose to stick with me and I was certain I wanted to marry her one day. We started a real relationship and lived together for our final 2 years of college.

My family hated Jane. I cannot understate how much they hated her. Refusing to meet her, telling her she'd go to hell for destroying a marriage and calling her a whore, refusing to invite me to family events and such, threatened to cut off my inheritance, told us both how shameful and vile we were etc etc. I tried telling them I loved Jane and would marry her one day but that just meant divorcing Amy and that was a whole another mess. I got slapped once when I raised my voice at my grandmother saying its her fault for forcing Amy onto me. Jane had her house egged one time. It was a shitshow.

But Jane stood by me and my family didn't show up for my graduation either. I cannot emphasize how much Jane meant to me and how much I loved her. We found out we were pregnant and I really did want to marry her right then. I filed for divorce but Amy wouldn't agree and my family refused to help me as I couldn't afford a lawyer for a long divorce fight. They weren't letting me marry Jane and also had no issue calling my baby a bastard and sin. I'm not sure why I stayed in contact with them ever.

Unfortunately Jane was 8 months pregnant when she was hit by a drunk driver and passed away on the way to the hospital. I was at work and practically collapsed when I received the call. I immediately called my brother and dad crying and asked them to meet me at the hospital. My brother didn't show up and my dad only came to tell me I could return home anytime I wanted. I just wanted to hug him and cry. I asked my family members to attend Jane and my baby's funeral but my dad said it was asking for too much and they couldn't pretend to accept a "whore" and insult Amy. I begged for at least one person to show up for me and none did. Jane grew up in Foster homes so the funeral was just lonely and sad. I still get dizzy if I think too much on it. Jane and I were 24 when this happened.

I'm 34 now. I'm not sure when I went NC with my family but one morning I woke up and was just done with them. I haven't spoken to them at all for years now. My distant cousins are still in my socials but I never text back to them. I travel around and work remotely so I've been able to avoid them hounding me too much. I won't pretend like I was some sad victim or had some moral standing over anybody. But I cannot get over the fact that my partner and baby died and not a single member of my family showed up or cared. I just can't imagine being around them anymore.

Recently, I found out my mom has cancer. She reached out via one of those cousins. Left me a large message about wanting me to return to my family and be by her side. I simply blocked that cousin and the 2 others that texted later. I was ranting to one of my friends and they said while they understood my pov, cancer was a different level and at least I could speak on the phone just to my mom. I told him I don't want to nor do I feel any remorse saying that. They called me an asshole for saying that. But I can't help my feelings. I'm still as bitter as I was 10 years ago.

Aitah?

My husband (26M) and I (24F) recently had our dream wedding themed around Dungeons & Dragons. Both of us are huge fans, and we thought it would be a fun and unique way to celebrate our special day, considering we met via playing the game. We both wore costumes, with my husband dressed as his eldrich knight PC and I dressed as a Seelie archfey. We even encouraged our guests to dress up, and many of them did, which made the day even more magical.

Most of our friends and family were supportive and seemed to have a great time. However, my sister-in-law (my husband's brother's wife)(29F) was not so pleased. She attended the wedding but refused to wear a costume, which was fine since it was optional. The problem started during the reception when she began making snide remarks about our theme. She loudly joked about how "childish" and "ridiculous" it was for adults to dress up like characters from a game, and even called it "a waste of a wedding."

I tried to brush it off at first, not wanting to cause a scene, but her comments continued throughout the night. She even said something directly to me about how I looked "like I was going to a Halloween party rather than my own wedding." By the end of the evening, I was really hurt and upset. My husband noticed and confronted her privately, but she brushed it off as "just joking."

She made fun of the food we chose to serve, the song we picked for our first dance (Merry-go-round of life from Howl's Moving Castle) and even my wedding dress because it wasn't a "real wedding dress". She hurt my feelings severely and when my husband stood up to her she told him our wedding was a "nerdy loser wedding". After the wedding was over my husband stopped talking to her entirely and only has spoken to his brother ever since.

Yesterday, a month after our wedding, we had a dinner party with our immediate families and I asked my husband if we could refrain from inviting her. He agreed and said she needed to be on a time out for disrespecting both of us. She found out she missed the dinner and is super angry with me, texting me that I'm an ass and a bitch for not inviting her but still inviting her husband. I told her that my BIL wasn't disrespectful and she shouldn't have been surprised we didn't want her around after she badmouthed our wedding. She told me I was a major asshole and that she was joking and talking about her preferences.

I feel really bad for not inviting her but I don't want to see her after she made our wedding about herself and her preferences. My husband agrees with me, but my BIL has since stopped talking to either of us because we "disrespected his wife" and that she was just joking and we can't take a joke. AITA?

When I was younger they were my favorite! I loved spending the night over their house. Then I started developing; the first time he saw I was wearing a bra we were in the garage. He started tickling me which swiftly turned into groping. I was young but I knew that wasn’t right. I told my mom, not much happened. When I was 13 he took all the kids out to the movies, and then spent the whole film trying to convince me to go to the car with him. Around 15 he would call me in the middle of the night trying to coax me out of the house, I never went. Thankfully I always had the strength to protect myself when others didn’t. Again I told and not much happened, except they requested that my Aunt no longer bring him to events… 24 years later and this request has not been granted. He’s at EVERY event, with them knowing that we don’t want him there and why. He wasn’t only inappropriate with me but my little sister and other women and girls in the family.

Saturday I cussed everyone out because why is he here? He’s a predator that we have requested her to not bring around us countless times. If she is going to disrespect us, it will be paid back on spades. I also told those who were adults while this was happening when I was a kid, that now that I have to do their job I don’t want to hear anything about my methods. I plan on going scorched earth at every family event. AITA

Alright Reddit, buckle up, because this is a rollercoaster.

I (28F) was engaged to my ex-fiancé "Mike" (30M) for two years. We were together for five years in total and were supposed to get married last summer. About three months before our wedding, I found out that he had been cheating on me with someone else. It was devastating, and I called off the wedding immediately. Mike moved away shortly after we broke up, and I thought that was the end of it. I was heartbroken, but I slowly started to move on with my life. Fast forward to last month, I get a call from my younger sister "Lily" (25F) saying she has exciting news and wants me to come over to our parents' house for dinner to share it. When I arrived, Lily and my parents were all smiles, and she drops the bombshell: she’s engaged. To Mike. My head was spinning. I felt like I was going to pass out. Lily and Mike had been secretly dating for the past year, and now they were engaged. My parents had known about it for months but decided to keep it from me to "protect my feelings." They actually thought I'd be happy for them eventually. Lily tried to justify it by saying she and Mike fell in love after our breakup and that their relationship is meant to be. She insisted that they didn't start dating until after we were officially over, but I felt betrayed on so many levels. I told them all that I wanted nothing to do with their wedding and stormed out. Since then, my parents and Lily have been bombarding me with calls and texts, calling me selfish and saying I'm overreacting. They claim that true love is rare and I should be supportive of Lily's happiness. Now, the wedding is in a few months, and the pressure is on. My parents have even threatened to cut me off financially if I don't attend. Some friends think I should go to keep the peace and show I'm over it, while others are appalled and say I have every right to be angry and to stay away. To add insult to injury, Lily recently asked if I would be her maid of honor, claiming she wants to mend our relationship. This request has left me torn—I don't want to ruin our family dynamic further, but I can't shake the hurt and betrayal I feel.

So, AITA for refusing to attend my sister's wedding after she secretly dated and got engaged to my ex-fiancé?

My younger half sister Leah (19f) is getting married. Our dad and her mom are paying for the wedding and this will come in a bit later. I (27f) was asked by Leah if she could borrow a necklace I wore on my wedding day, that was my mom's before me, which she wore to her wedding to my dad. This was a sore topic. Even though my mom had wanted all of her jewelry to go to me, dad had given Leah a few things when she was a child. He told me I had no say in the matter and he loved my mom and wanted both his daughters to have pieces of her even though Leah is not my mom's child. I still dislike that she has some of my mom's jewelry. But I know dad has built her up to see it as something sweet.

So when she asked me to borrow the necklace I wore on my wedding day and mom wore on hers, it stung again. I told her she could not borrow that but I offered to let her borrow some of my jewelry. Stuff that isn't connected to my mom. Leah told me that wasn't fair and she wanted to get married matching me on my wedding day in some way. She asked if I'd feel differently if dad and her mom weren't paying for it. She told me she knows I don't like her parents and she doesn't think I should take it out on her. I said no, it's not that, it's that I don't want to share my mom's jewelry with her. That I never wanted her to have some of my mom's stuff. That was all dad. And I wasn't giving her another piece even just for one day. She accused me of gatekeeping my mom. She told me she had just as much right to it as I did. I asked her why when she has her own mom. She told me because everyone knows dad only ever loved my mom and her mom is less than second best. And clearly sharing something from my mom means he loves her (Leah) as an actual daughter despite him not loving her mom. That she wants to feel like I love her as a true sister and not some half thing that I wish didn't exist. She told me letting her borrow the necklace can show that. I still said no.

AITA?

I became a dad at 16 and my son became a dad when he was 17 making me a grandpa at 33. I'm currently 45 years old with both a grandparent still alive and grandchildren. Since my oldest I've had 8 more kids and a ninth on the way. Ask me anything.

EDIT: When I posted this AMA I had figured most questions would be respectful in asking about my situation. Maybe I was stupid for that because most people here have been insulting bullies who just want to insult me and my family. Guess I don't belong on this website. So congrats you won the stupid redneck can get off your elite site. To those who were trying to genuinely understand I'm sorry but other users ruined the whole thing. Have a good day and be kinder to people that are different than you in real life than you are here. Thanks.

Throw away account because my family follows may main. Using mobile, excuse the format.

I have two children Bea and James( 23) from my first marriage. We divorced when the kids were four. In the divorce I got full custody and he was suppose to pay child support plus half medical/dental and every other weekend visitation ( He never showed up to the court proceedings). For the first two years he would sporadically come by to see the children. He rarely paid CS and was locked up a few time for non payment. We went back to court and they reduced his child support to 200.00 a month for both kids. He never paid. He owes close to 90k in back child support and obviously he never paid any medical/ dental bills. I found out a week ago that my ExBIL reached out to James to talk on behalf of my ex. My Ex wants to reconnect( it’s been 17 years) but he is worried about the back CS that’s owed. James has talked to me and asked me if I would drop the backed owed CS so him and his father can start a relationship. I spoke to my current husband and he said it’s up to me. I believe that my ex is just using our son to get the CS dropped. I doubt I will ever receive any money that’s owed, it’s just the principal of it. I haven’t told James my decision yet because maybe I’m just being petty. I have spoken with close friends about it that say I would be the AITA if I did not drop the CS case.

FYI: My ex works under the table and also has a wife and a SD that he provides for. He’s been living fine throughout the years he just didn’t want to pay CS.

Also, he did not reach out to Bea just James. The reason being in my opinion is because Bea is a girl. Bea doesn’t want to have anything to do with him.

Edit: because of back CS owed my ex has a warrant out. ( he has had that warrant out for years) That’s why he wants me to drop it. I assuming the logic is if I dropped the CS, then the warrant would be void and he would be able to start reconnecting with James.

Context:

3 weeks ago, my (15F) parents (41F, 53M) welcomed into the world my twin baby brothers Jonah and Isaac. They are the sweetest bundles of joy, but were absolutely "oops" babies, on account of my parents' ages.

This is the situation:

Ever since the birth, my mom has been out of the house when the twins have needed something, in the bathroom, or too busy with whatever she's doing to come and tend to their needs. I know it's not work because she's a SAHM. My dad's never home, and my sister, Neveah, (17F) is too busy planning her wedding (in a state of mania and breaking down mentally because I don't think she even loves the guy she's engaged to) to help me with anything.

This leaves the babies to me. It was fine the first few days it happened, I get that healing from birth sucks and postpartum depression is a thing, but it doesn't feel fair that these responsibilities keep falling to me. This Sunday, at 6 in the morning while we were all getting ready for church, it fell to me to wake the twins, feed them, wash them, change them, and get them dressed. I also had to load them into the car. I hardly had time to get myself ready while my family was yelling for me to "hurry up" and "get in the damn car, Libby," (thanks, Dad). I am fifteen. I also have marching band responsibilities. I do not have the mental bandwidth to deal with this.

This leads to today. My sister and I were having lunch while talking about wedding planning (she's getting married to our pastor's son (19M), so it's kinda a big deal). We were bantering and debating floral arrangements (she was having one of her better mental health days), when all of a sudden we heard the twins start crying. They screamed and cried, and I just sat flipping through magazines before I noticed my sister staring at me. The interaction went something like this:

Me: "What, Neveah?"

Neveah, a bit annoyed: "Aren't you gonna get that?"

Me: "Get what?"

Neveah: "The twins. Duh."

I don't know what came over me, but I groaned and yelled that I hated being the boys' live-in nanny instead of their sister, and that I couldn't understand why Mom can't take care of them herself. I ranted for a while. I said I hated not being able to get sleep, or even take care of my own needs because I had to watch out for the boys first. Neveah got a nasty look on her face and told me I was an ass for trying to make Mom's life harder than it needs to be, and that I should be overjoyed that our parents have bestowed me the "blessing" of taking care of our brothers and being able to bond with them while they're still young. I asked her that if it was such a blessing, why couldn't she help out? This made her just get pissy with me and walk away.

It's been a few hours, and my sister still hasn't talked to me. It's very clear to me that she's been avoiding me, so am I really that much of an asshole for not wanting to take care of my brothers?