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This is a subreddit about "The Grand Tour", Amazon's car show hosted by former BBC Top Gear presenters: Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond and James May.


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The Grand Tour S03E04 "Pick Up Put Downs" - Discussion thread

S03E04 Pick Up, Put Downs

In this episode Jeremy Clarkson drives the Volkswagen Amarok, Richard Hammond tries a Ford Ranger and James May is in a Mercedes X-class as they attempt to find the best of the new breed of European pick-up trucks with a series of tests based on life in the developing world. Also in the show, Jeremy is at the Eboladrome to try out the snorting, swollen, near-600 horsepower Jaguar XE Project 8.

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I’m not sure if I’m happy that they weren’t actually practicing atrocious gun safety or disappointed that they were shooting blanks

Both

Well the AKs appeared to be airsoft anyway..

Do they even make blanks for a Browning?

Well movie studios use 50’s in war movies all the time and it isn’t like blanks are difficult to manufacture

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Yes - .50 BMG blanks are very common

They weren't airsoft guns. They were firearms converted to fire blanks.

That's airsoft for sure

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I didn't catch that while watching but you are right. The bore is way too small.

Source: this "real" AK in my hands I'm looking at. Real as in its US legal and does not have select fire.

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Likely had just a muzzle at the end to work with blanks. Similar to militaries all around the world when they play war.

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Also i think the AK they gave James had a wire under folding stock, but the one he shot had a wood one.

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Where did you see they were shooting blanks?

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I could listen to May talking about WW2 airplanes for hours.

Check out his Reassembler series on YouTube. Its just May putting things together and talking

Loved that series, is he still doing it?

You can also watch James May's Cars Of The People

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James was wrong though as while it is true the Hurricane shot down more planes the reason for it was because the Hurricane was targetting the bombers, which are easier to shoot down, while the Spitfires were going after the 109's.

Yeah, it's almost as if it's not an either-or Spitfires or Hurricanes won the war, but that they had different roles to fill, and relied upon each other

They really did. There is no way the Spitfire alone could have won the battle as they did not have enough of them, but also if the Spitfire did not exist then it would have been a lot harder for the Hurricane's as well since they would have to fight against ME109's, and the Hurricane was not as good a fighter as the ME109.

The Hurricane was excellent at shooting down German dive bombers and bombers though while the Spitfire gave them space to do so, keeping the ME109 busy and distracted.

Its like when people try to compare modern jet fighters.

The F-22, F-35, F-16, and F-18 all have different roles. (Although as my Airforce family says "The F-35 is a really great plane that doesn't know what it wants to be when it grows up".

That description of the f35 is just perfect

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I can listen to him talk about anything for hours. Thankfully there's many hours of content on YouTube and various shows of him talking about things.

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That was literally my first raction too when Clarkson said the Spitfire won the Battle of Britain. I was so excited when May actually bought it up that it was in fact the Hurricaine that had the most kills!

Thanks to War Thunder I learned the difference between all those WW2 fighters!

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Bit of a downer with how fake the race & gun sections were

Jag was a sexy beast though

What gave the fake gun segments away was the fact that everyone single one of them was shooting in the direction of the cameras/camera cars. The thought of Jeremy on a 50 Cal shooting in your direction is very terrifying.

I suspect you'd have have a hard time finding anywhere in England remote enough to get safely fire rifles up in the air like that. Anyone have any idea how far a 50 cal bullet would fly?

I struggle to remember from the tiny amount of training I had exact distances but something like 3-5 miles for a larger hunting rifles like .303 rings a bell. I believe largely for that reason you have to go a bit further north in Ontario than I am order to shoot a rifle larger than .22.

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I have a theory that the 3 basically used Season 1 to fulfill some male power fantasies that they had brewing. Lots of guns, explosions, and running around like over the hill and out of shape James Bond. I don't hate this season as much as others do, but I'm glad they were wrangled in.

Since this is supposedly from Season 1, I'm ok with that and am looking forward to seeing if they can keep the same momentum from episode 1.

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Lol the Oxfam joke. So questionable but so good,

I didn't get it...

Holy fuck

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How old was the footage in this, as those heads were made for S1 and the pickups were all 17/67 plates.

Looks like season 1 rejected footage

That would explain why that truck segment felt very season 1-ish to me.

I did enjoy it, but I thought the test premise they used was fairly unnecessary and forced. It felt like a step backwards.

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the trucks were teased on twitter/facebook shortly after season 1 ended, but for some reason they never showed it till now....i think they needed to pad out season length.

Definitely appears that way. No season can be all gold and a bad Grand Tour is still leagues ahead of new Top Gear.

Last seasons top gear was excellent. Much better than evans ones

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Honestly seems like the only people still bashing new TG are the ones who haven't watched a second of it. Chris Harris is excellent as always and the chemistry with Rory and Matt has only gotten better with each episode.

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Probably, it felt like a season 1 episode.

If that's the case, rejecting it was the right call. I wish they stuck with that decision.

Idk, I really liked this episode.

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Look at the length of James hair length when they are taking the statues down compared to when they are talking later in the episode. His hair is longer. It's an old episode

You’re probably right that this is from S1. They had the picture of Jeremy on the horse, shirtless. I think it was supposed to be a reference to how they blew up his house in season 1, but it became an Easter Egg in this season. They probably needed to pad the runtime or something.

Also the reference to how they went to Jordan. It would’ve been more apt in S1, since they went to Jordan then and more people watching would’ve remembered it right away.

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My lego!

Everything you need in life.

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May 'Beef Torpedo' Zedong

"You are a man of modest statue"

Best laugh I've had in a while.

"You shouldn't have built a life-size one."

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"Enough room for a borrowed oil painting.."

I died.

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I’m not English. What’s with all the jokes about Jags and thieves? They built a whole episode around it last season. It’s hilarious, but I’m definitely missing something here.

It's a recurring bit from Top Gear, beginning with this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7eWIrBOc3zE

Jaaaag owners are polite, proper gentlemen, but also scam artists.

It's so nice Clarkson and May let that 12 year old Make A Wish kid host with them for that episode.

But that's okay, because you've got a Jaaaaaaag.

Actually that's a critical point I didn't mention - you're given a pass for your scamming becasue you have a cool car and people expect it.

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Small bit of Grand Tour nonsense from previous seasons, but still better than the most nonsensical episodes from S1 & S2. The important thing is that the laughs are still genuine in parts.

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Yeah I love the three just racing in the countryside in pickup trucks but every single movement they made felt scripted.

They should just have gone with three cheap used pickups and benchmarked them against a new one. I miss the good old Cheap Car Challenges.

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Of course Jeremy can’t handle his hose properly.

If only Hammond had delivered that “Run Away” in proper Monty Python fashion.

Not gonna lie, I didn't care much for this episode, but the look on Hammond's face when bouncing uphill was glorious.

"Careful. A bit of a bump."

Yeah... a bit 😂

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I think the problem with the pick-up truck segment was that didn’t truly care about them, their best segments of a similar type are when they genuinely like the cars they are driving. If you think back to the top gear days when they did those challenges they were funny because they genuinely wanted their car to win. When they arnt personally invested in the vehicle it becomes very forced and silly.

I still enjoyed the episode because they still manage to crack a few good laughs but definitely not a strong episode, hopefully next week is a good 1. Still love the show tho!

That's because only Hammond appreciates a good pickup.

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The Amarok is a fine looking truck but Clarkson spinning his tires on that hill looks like a damning indictment of it

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No LSD

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Idk, it might improve the driver's experience, at least

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As an American, I have never wanted a "British" car more than I want a Project 8 Jag...it's up there with the VXR8 Bathurst for me.

VXR8 was an Australian Holden VE Commodore SS rebadged in the uk as Vauxhall ( hence the name Bathurst), you Americans got a variant of the same car as the Pontiac G8 with a detuned engine

Oh I know the G8 is basically the same car but the style of the Bathurst and that supercharger whine gives me the fizz.

And I'm aware I could get a G8 and swap some body panels and add a supercharger, but it wouldn't be the same IMO.

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"There's no such thing as a cheap helicopter...

...well - except that one now."

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The Project 8 film and Conversation Street were great, in fact one of the best Conversation Streets, but the pick up bit and the repeated celebrity segment joke is just like series 1 at its lowest points.

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Conversation street for the FIRST TIME in years has felt like I was watching The Neeeews

The Neeeews

The Nyeewwws.

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I've noticed a pattern. I watch the episode and think "well, that was quite entertaining!", then go to Reddit, see it immediately torn to shreds and my opinion instantly changes. Happened with Doctor Who this entire last season (which I thought was rather good, public opinion be damned), and now with this too.

I seriously ought to stay out of these threads, at least not until the full season's done and the complete picture is formed.

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I had fun watching it and liked the episode. It was like the usual Top Gear silliness, just a fun episode which wasn't too hung up on reviewing the cars. People on the internet need to calm down. It's Grand Tour, not Game of Thrones, not every episode needs to be able to one up the previous one in terms of quality.

I come here to share and laugh at the jokes from the episode, not to complain about how I didn't like this one thing and now I'm pissed off....

Reddit has a tendency to expect unachievable standards

Exactly. I enjoyed the episode wasn't the best but wasn't bad. People expect the un-doable

especially with them being at this for ages. you can't expect every episode to be amazing.

i was happier watching when i didn't know it was scripted/faked. seeing the can of fuel fall, ok that's going to be an incredibly fake explosion. the pickups loaded with crap, ok jeremy's going to go really fast and lose most of it. may will go slow and keep most of it.

the guns you can just tell there's nothing actually getting hit and jeremy's was incredibly clear they're detonations going off and not bullet hits.

especially with them being at this for ages. you can't expect every episode to be amazing.

i was happier watching when i didn't know it was scripted/faked.

It actually was also just less scripted/faked in the past.

Watch some cheap car challenges from series 7-13. You can tell they didn't know about all the challenges before they happened. Sometimes they knew, but a lot of times they didn't. And it showed.

Once you've heard someone's genuine laugh... It's so easy to tell the fake laugh... And this episode had a lot of them fake laughing.

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Exactly. I enjoyed the episode wasn't the best but wasn't bad. People expect the un-doable

Watch Top Gear in seasons 7-13. It is absolutely doable to have this stuff not feel so blatantly staged. All you have to do is not blatantly stage it.

Watch the British Leyland challenge. It's clear they knew they were going to the Mira test track to test the cars... But it's also clear they didn't know exactly what the tests would be.

They need to stop creating set pieces and just put the boys in a genuinely unknown situation then film their reactions.

And people always wanna compare great episodes to the old top gear days. When in reality there are soo many forgettable episodes from those seasons too. We just remember the best ones and set the standard there.

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It's not unacheivable, when the same people have achieved it many times.

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That's wise. I often go to episode discussions and leave thinking my own taste in entertainment is shit, but don't let others dictate what you like or don't like. If you like it, that's all that matters.

I thought it was one of the funniest TGT episodes, reminds of me of that TG episode Clarkson and May did, where they drove around in affordable SUVs and throw junks away in the "tip"

You know how you can tell it's not? The guys aren't laughing at each other genuinely in this episode, except maybe for a moment when clarkson's statue falls. Even in the silliest episodes, you can tell when the guys are having fun vs. just going through the motions and this was the latter. That joy and humor is the magic of the show, whether in epic adventures or small silly moments. They don't fall over laughing at each other for missing all the targets because they know that was super fake and planned and they aren't good enough actors to fake genuine laughter (which is a good thing).

I was just writing this to another person: once you've heard someone's genuine laugh... You can tell from then on when a laugh is fake.

If people don't know what I'm on about, watch the TG episode where they use tanks to demolish houses. Clarkson says about his mine clearer "princess Diana had one of these" and all three of them - and the crew - burst out laughing. You can especially hear Hammond. That's real.

Hammond when the statues were falling over in this episode? Fake.

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It was fun and entertaining. It’s not one of their better episodes but it isn’t as awful as some here would have you believe.

whole last season of doctor who was just so unbelievably boring to me =/

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Kim Jong-Clarkson will have staying power

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Why does Jeremy have to win all the time? Is that supposed to be some running joke that i'm not finding funny, or is he really that needy? Every time there's a challenge that's obviously staged and scripted and we don't get to see any real outcome from, it's always so Jeremy can win.

I get that the joke challenges are part of the show, but it's really bothering me how patronizing the show seems towards Jeremy. Especially when all the challenges in an episode turn out to be jokes.

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Totally agree with you there. It started back in Top Gear, but at least it was funny when he came up with some ridiculous way of winning "James tell everyone to buy a car built by an ideology you hate" now it just seems unnecessary.

Also ever since the Patagonia special I have been really sick of the "lets pick on Hammond cause he's young and short LOL" it just gets irritating when you can see they wrote it for a low hanging joke.

Was it a low hanging joke so Hammond could reach it?

hah

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“Don’t clap, he killed a man!”

Jeremy Clarkson firing a .50 cal slo-mo out of the bed of a pickup truck just might be the most American thing I've ever seen.

Too bad they were blank rounds...

Oh no, you've ruined the illusion that Amazon let them fire rounds willy nilly in the UK countryside with no regard for safety.

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Is it a bad time to tell you that wrestling is also fake?

This was originally going to be done for real. 4 weeks before filming a decision was made to do this in the UK and swap a live .50 Cal for a blank firing one.

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Weak episode imo. Felt closer to Season 1 in terms of how obviously staged everything was. Pretty much the whole pickup test section was a waste of time.

because it was filmed before season 2.

Wait really? That explains a lot.

Remember when we used to get pictures of these statues being transported around? That was around Season 1 if I'm not mistaken.

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Sooo scripted. I get it, a lot of scenarios have been over the years, but the more obvious the scripting (or bad the writing the worse). We get it, they missed all their shots... ha. ha. /s Same for the barrel rolling into the chopper or the hose flying all over. I get it's supposed to be slapstick, but when the guys are put in a genuinely challenging situation and you get their genuine reactions instead, the show is sooooo much better. They aren't very good actors, they are presenters.

Exactly! They are good presenters who happened to have great chemistry between them. So just drop them in a scenario without giving them a script and roll the cameras. I mean it's a very simple formula, one they've used for years. I guess "trying not to repeat yourself" is the greatest problem here. The signs were there with the last 1 or 2 seasons of Top Gear as well.

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They could have been more authentic and still used comedy to test the trucks. The race to the helicopter was the best part, aside from the end.

Yeah and it was GREATLY amplified by following the Colombia specials.

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Felt like that one episode with a plane hostage escape. It was so bad I couldn’t watch it again, but this was similar.

The hostage episode is the only episode of Top Gear/Grand Tour that I have never finished. I couldn't get through that segment.

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I agree. It was.... cringe inducing.

they cant all be good

There’s been pretty much one episode per season that’s felt too scripted and has been bad in general.

The Jordan episode in season 1, the “Unscripted” episode in season 2, and now this episode. The first season appeared more scripted than the other seasons, but I still think the hostage segment indeed stuck out as the worst.

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Look at the length of James hair length when they are taking the statues down compared to when they are talking later in the episode. His hair is longer. It's an old episode

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Now hold on, what if you needed to haul a load of dirt or gravel in that Nissan Mercedes??? You'd bow out the bed, drop the tailgate and lose your load.

To be fair, all trucks do this. Quite a few of my Raptor buddies that have a lot of offroad miles on their Gen 1s actually had to provide reinforcement to fix this problem. You see it with any truck used hard over time.

Ya that's fine with proper wear and tear. James' truck was brand new. I don't care what was in those barrels, they shouldn't be able to produce the metal fatigue or weld fractures that would be needed for that amount of warp. My guess is their alignment was "good enough" for someone buying a Mercedes...as in they didn't expect anyone to put it through any rigorous work with that kind of price tag

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Eh. My dad's 97 f350 has been hauling literal tons of class 5 for 15 years and it may be a bit rusty the bed hasn't "bowed"

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It wasn't a great episode, and then they did the super fake gun section and it became quite a poor one.

Yeah, that whole segment landed with a thud. Is it funny that they missed everything when it was obvious they weren't the ones actually shooting anything? No. It's not.

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Do you mind if I charge my Jaaaaaaaag at your house?

This episode was pure garbage. Plain and simple.

I don’t understand why they think all these theatrics are necessary. That’s not what we’re watching the show for.

Couldn't agree more. The show has absolutely no need for this action movie crap. It lives off the illusion that the jokes and incidents are genuine. These out-of-place stunts are destroying that illusion, thus taking the fun out of it.

Their best moments are the ones where they simply drive from A to B in odd places and odd cars while taking the vehicles and presenters a bit out of their comfort zone. The specials (apart from India), the old car trips, the amphibious attempts, that's where the trio really shines.

Dead on analysis.

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Very season 1-esque. Far too obviously scripted, would have preferred an actual review of the trucks.

BUFFETING

I was slightly disappointed with this episode as they did not need the premise of "civil war" to test the cars. Also it was pointless having the last test since it was obviously staged and they were clearly not firing live rounds, which sort of spoiled the fun.

I did however enjoy the race to the helicopter though as that felt much less scripted.

The helicopter race was alright, conversation street was good, and the Jag bit was pretty much great. The rest I didn't care for one bit, but you know... it is what it is. There's always the next episode I guess.

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The helicopter race was alright, but it honestly felt exactly like the SUV race in Oh, Canada. The only other fair test was the toppling of the stone heads, but since Jeremy's test copped out with the tiny Hammond head, it was tainted. It's fine when Jeremy cheats, but not in such an obvious way.

The helicopter race was alright, but it honestly felt exactly like the SUV race in Oh, Canada.

I see what you mean and agree they are very similar. I personally think the Canada episode was a lot better and had more "depth" to its content, however.

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Oh, yeah. The Canada episode was much better. It was actually one of my favorite episodes in S2, and I liked how they broke the tests down into the relevant Sportiness, Utility, and Vehicle categories. It just made more sense than the civil war theme of this episode, which just makes me more disappointed in this episode as I have a soft spot for pick up trucks.

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After 20+ seasons the magic is fading. But I liked the Jag bit a lot, the car porn segments are always some of my favorites.

the car porn segments are always some of my favorites.

They do seem to work well very consistently. The car segments and the history segments are really good.

I'm not sure about magic fading (or depends on from what perspective I suppose). The good bits still work, even the good funny bits and the good obviously set up bits. But I don't think the overall writing and ideas are very good very often. As an example, I actually enjoyed the latest special (though the beginning was very slow), but because it was based on an ongoing "gimmick", i.e. photographing animals, it meant that it wasn't as much focused on the journey and whatever happened during it, and the on screen time was more often distracted by the gimmick itself. Also, they tend to write towards their fake characters a bit more than they used to. Still, it wasn't bad, because a lot still worked. I guess my point is, if they just did it a bit better it would be better than ever, because the technology and budget give ever better opportunities.

Agreed. They took the mick out of people who say its scripted but either their acting has got worse, or the production team are managing every single peice of it they arent allowing set ups which bring their natural wit and comedy value. They are trying ro be too clever imo and the production execution is poor.

These episodes are filler and a bit shite but the 3 are still worth watching.

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They’re the party poppers of the developing world!

This was kind of a crap episode. Almost everything was staged. But I'd assume these episodes help fund the well produced specials and road trips that we love. VW, Ford, and Merc probably give Amazon some real $$$ in order to feature their cars in these filler episodes.

Way too much unfunny scripted garbage during the pick-up test.

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Definitely weaker. It seems straight out of season 1 or 2 compared to the S3E1. I'm now curious as to see what next week's episode is like, anyone know what is up next?

“One extra cylinder, TODAY ONLY!” - Things Americans will hear at their Ford dealer when they inquire about the new Ranger

The American version uses a turbocharged 4-cylinder

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I feel like the thing that made Top gear so good is how unscripted it seemed. I didn't enjoy this episode as much as the past few as you could tell it was scripted a lot of the time.

For example the first scene was hilarious when Jeremy dropped the hose until they started sensationalising the situation by throwing stuff at James or the peasants and going full Michael bay and blowing up the lights. This completely pulled me out of it and made it not funny.

The episode is also really random and it seemed like every challenge was put there solely for easy laughs rather than testing the cars abilities.

That said, it's still much better than S1 and S2 which I found boring and at times (most of S1) unwatchable.

Edit: just finished it and the helicopter explosion gag just highlights my point. Completely unnecessary and obviously satire but in no way funny to me.

Lucky you mate, you aren't alone. I find the pickup test rather cringy. I only prefer the Jag test drive review, and that's all.

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May falling while trying to shoot a gun was hysterical

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Only just started the episode, but that opening scene with the angry water hose was fucking hilarious.

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The "peasant" getting blasted was clearly planned, but it made me belly laugh.

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I honestly didn’t enjoy it that much, I enjoyed the flee race, jag review, and helicopter race apart from the end, also had some funny jokes but way too much of it felt scripted, like blatantly obvious scripted, 5/10

Filler episode. Nothing really good in it.

I liked the Jaaaaag review, but the rest was a bit meh

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I laughed hard at “welcome to Richard hammonds usual weekend”

None of the pick up would work in developing country if they can’t eat rubbish diesel, I think.

That's true.

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The Project 8 seems like Jaguar’s version of the AMG Hammer from the 80’s.

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It's basically an all out racing car with number plates and back seats. It's awesome!

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Is it just going to be Clarkson doing the review segments? I liked when they mixed it up

: /

this was disappointing.

The premise of the pickup test was actually good, in my opinion. Great set up for a lot of black humour. However, the execution was lackluster and cringeworthy. I wish they would go with a similar concept for one of their future road trip specials - buy some cheap used pick-ups and do real challenges in some African country. Maybe see if US-American trucks can keep up with the good old indestructible Toyota HiLux. Hammond could just re-use his truck from the Colombia Special and May could drive a Holden Ute since he would never buy a pick-up.

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Not a great episode this week, any time they use a gun it ruins the focus of a test, and the scripted feel of the show felt much more in play this week.

This episode was boring as hell

Mr. Willman lost his damn mind to give Clarkson what amounts to an anti-aircraft gun.

Not like they were firing real rounds.

The visual is terrifying enough

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What was the joke about the word they can't say?

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Yeah watching it again I noticed her really emphasized “CANT say”

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The name of the car (Kona) means Cunt in portuguese. Source: am portuguese

Fleshy cabinets

Kona is slang for vagina.

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Surprise GLA Soundtrack appearance at 11:00

Think it's around this time

Next time we'll get the Chinese soundtrack at this rate.

USA

Chinese

GLA

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Need to get back to genuine challenges.

A great programme for that is the league of their own road tour

the continuity errors in this are just strange. How did James' rope go from being on the bottom of the pillar to above half height?

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I couldn't stop laughing at "no my lego!".

"Stand up!"

"I am standing up!"

"From a beef torpedo to a silk purse" was probably the high point of the episode.

I have never watched an episode of TGT with a more straight face. And whats with all the uncontrollable laughter when they are toppling the statues of supposed 'dictators'? It wasn't funny at all, not even a bit (except of hammond's tiny statue, but lets be honest, we all knew it was gonna be tiny)

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am I the only one who thinks the "Hammond is short" jokes got old in season 9 of Top Gear?

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We dont get a diesel Ranger in the US :(

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Chevrolet has a diesel Colorado though, but it is not anything special.

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"I'm doing winning!!!"

Any LGBT joles that Will Young can get offended about?

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Look at the length of James hair length when they are taking the statues down compared to when they are talking later in the episode. His hair is longer. It's an old episode

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The pick up segment was OK, but I think it lacked structure and sacrificed actual competition for cheap gags too many times. It all seemed random and rushed. I thought it might be similar to the challenge segments in the old TG days, with a proper scoring system, and introducing the cars first, and at least some semblance of an actual competition (but with a fair amount of cheating still). The bit at the start could have made a great final challenge, but was just a throwaway opening gag.

I don't hate the segment, but I think it could have been a lot better than what it was.

Brilliant episode, this made me realize how much I'm going to miss the tent next season

What will they go back to on a disappointing note?

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Wish they went to a real military range and shot live rounds.

Surprised none of them said they would have a Hilux anyways.

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lmao that GLA soundtrack

It's called a Toyota Hilux.

How is the Ford Ranger an european Pick up Truck?

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Turkish Engine.

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Wasn't that place with the gun test the same place where they filmed the police chase in S21E01

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Lukewarm episode with decent amount of laughs but that Jag though.

So Jeremy abusing gardens will be a recurring theme this season? Jeremy show us on the doll where the bad vegetables hurt you.

That Project 8 is a work of art.

Why do they need guns ?

I don't know if anyone else noticed this but during the "chaos" bit they played music from one of my favorite video games from years ago... Command and Conquer: Generals. I'd recognize that music anywhere.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OBm2mz3IHoM&t=187s

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After the special this episode just fell flat. Funny moments but wasn't very interesting