This is a subreddit about "The Grand Tour", Amazon's car show hosted by former BBC Top Gear presenters: Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond and James May.
The Grand Tour S03E03 "Colombia Special Part 2" - Discussion thread
S03E03 Colombia Special Part 2
In a special episode, Clarkson, Hammond and May clatter across Colombia in a Jeep Wrangler, a Chevrolet Silverado pick-up and a Fiat Panda 4x4 as they attempt to capture high quality images of interesting animals to be used as Amazon’s new screensavers, encountering epic scenery, extreme peril, weird hobbies and even some actual animals along the way.
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“You look like something found in a pyramid” hahaha
Completely lost it there.
“Open the sarcophagus an- AHHHHHHH!!!!!!”
"I'm not putting that in the British Museum"
That was the best. Thats why they keep James May around.
You could see it was completely unscripted and original James May from the fact how it slowly set into the others heads what james just said :D
You can always tell by his smile when he thinks of a joke mid conversation. May is the best.
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His line cracked me up, but then the others' gradual realization and their own slow cracking-up absolutely killed me.
James May is low key the funniest of all three of them.
Good to see genuine laughter from the boys there. You could tell is was 100% not scripted.
The footnotes, or whatever Amazon calls them, are awesome. Definitely move your mouse often to see them. "As he drives slightly back and forth in the big hole, Richard is using an off-roading technique called 'making things worse.'"
I couldn't stop laughing at those. I love the fact they refer to 3 idiots through out the commentary.
What are those footnotes? Something you can activate and see through the episode?
look for a thing on your screen called "X-Ray"
The crew lost 6 Toyota Land Cruisers?! I want to see that documentary!
I noticed that too! Am I the only one who really loves the crew interaction? I’d be down for a behind the scenes style video of all the things they screw up!
I really want to know how the camera cars and support truck cross the obstacles they come across, like the the bridges and ferries they've built over the years.
I've always been curious about this, I'd love a bonus episode every year showing the crew. We kinda had one the time Clarkson did the drift challenge.
I'm guessing that in order to get all the cool shots the camera crew has to travel more, and into more precarious situations, than the stars.
I’ve always guessed that they shoot the route once with the main guys. Then shoot it again (kinda-backwards) with stand-in drivers for the really wide shots.
Yea for real. Like to know what killed a few LC200s.
Cocai...no wait. Damnit.
Nearly got to the end of the comments without mentioning cocaine
You know that Nun who saw Clarkson in short shorts knew instantly she made the correct decision to stay celibate.
And don't forget that moment, when you're somewhere in Colombia and some small city and you meet one of your fans there.
Top Gear once had almost 300 Million Viewers accross the globe, so i guess you can't really hide when you're Jeremy Clarkson.
Is it just me or does Clarkson sometimes say “aminal” instead of animal ?
I heard it too. That aminal.
He has since top gear
"any aminal that comes, it will become a veneer"
“Un Aminal”
He puts incorrect emphasis on certain words and it’s so childish but I find it hilarious. Almost as hilarious as him trying to pronounce welsh or Romanian place names
Like when he says "bebby"
Anytime he says “Bebby Jesus” I crack up. I don’t know what I find so funny about it but it really makes me laugh.
I remember in the Africa special, he said "That is... an river."
He uses “a” and “an” incorrectly on purpose as well.
Loved the handball call on Kiff the one armed sound guy. Glad to see him again!
I think he also appeared in an ep of TG where they drove cars on top of each other. Bottom car was doing the accelerating/breaking, top one doing the steering.
He did! The German “Top Gear” vs Top Gear UK event (Series 11, Episode 6). That was a funny one where he lost his arm while steering
Thanks, was wondering how he lost his arm.
And wilman made a rare on camera appearance as well!
Only they would have a one-armed sound guy.
"Jeremy! My arm's come off!"
"No one's every said that in a car race before!"
He fought a shark once. He lost, but still he's very brave.
“It’s raining men” blaring from an American made car that has a radio unit that only displays Japanese while being driven through Colombia by a Brit.
What a rich, diverse tapestry this show weaves.
That bit had me bawling.
That stereo head unit screen was on gps with some Japanese location when he tried to turn it off
And they got through the whole program without once mentioning cocaine.
Gak is literally what coke was referred to in London. Gak being the acronym of the shipping company in the packaging of Hammond's truck in the ocean.
These guys are like onions.
They have a strong odor?
No they make you cry
I really like they they’re including the more candid moments. Jeremy laughing at the others quick remarks, they really seem to genuinely have fun in there shared misery. These two episodes are probably my favorite of TGT and might only be behind a couple other Top Gear episodes.
Same. Was laughing my ass off the whole time. I actually wouldn't mind if they did like a 5 or even 10-part version of these specials. When they cover super long distances in a 2-second shot of the map, you just know there's got to be a ton of banter and beautiful shots that are unceremoniously thrown on the cutting room floor, locked in an amazon vault, never to be seen again. They could even have a quick studio session at the end discussing the whole thing.
I'd bet that this reaction is why they've done away with the tent in future seasons. Just go straight to the stuff that's getting the best responses. That said, you'd think a bloopers/directors cut reel would be a gold mine.
“I’m very close to coming out.”
“We know that, you’ve bought a Jeep.”
I laughed so hard. 😂😂
"I'll give you a small tug."
was it a gentle tug?
Am LGBT. Owned Jeep. It's all true.
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FTFY
FTFY
"The king of spades, Edgar Hussein. Paddington."
never heard these words next to eachother
Quite funny actually because Jeremy's parents sent him to university by being the first to create a Paddington toy(they made one for Jeremy as a child and decided to sell them).
Hammond's just been on point with the jokes lately. The James' cold "camera" on part one, the sarcophagus one, the coming out one in this part two hahahahahaha
Will amazon actually use these pictures? It’d be funny if they did ... they could probably use stills from this episode though, seeing as how good the camera work is
In part one there is a function where you can see pictures from the show. Not ones they took, but who knows.
edit: Those end credit pictures, there is some gold in there..
Happy James with the donkey was concerning.
I better see this award winner on my Fire's home screen https://imgur.com/a/d5zTtt0
There is some in the credits
The one of Hammond!
I've got cramps laughing at the humming bird scene
Why was James’ car on its side there?
It was the running gag of Jeremy and Richard moving his car when he slept, this time they tipped it over.
I loved when they moved it just slightly too close to the wall for James to get in properly
I really love how they're doing this stuff now and not over-explaining/reacting to the gag. Instead, they just let it sit there and smolder in the background.
Ah, thanks!
Because.... Claaarksoooon! you son of a b.... or Hammooooonnndd!
Were the hummingbirds CGI?
No but Clarkson looked like a blow-up doll with that lipstick.
That fist bump
They straight fucking punched each other's fists, lol
Exactly what I would have thought two 55 year old British men would do when fist bumping.
James' selfie with the donkey was genuinely good though
"The Famous James"
I'm glad that the pictures were included in the end. Would have been disappointing to not see the final results
That roadkill was brutal! Haha
Yeah i was suprised that they bleeped out all the "fucks" and then they show the animal corpse haha
Maybe it's my mind playing games but I swear they bleep out the fucks but leave the start of the f for a split second, which makes it so much better.
Does a bear shit in the woods?
Hammond does.
But does the pope?
Love that they caught Hammond taking a shit on the trap cam
i knew that was gonna be a thing from the moment he said he was going for one!
Clarkson's trousers....
Imagine being the guy who recognised him
I wonder how many places they could go around the world and not be recognized by at least one person.
The moon and... well... that's probably about it.
The boys have to be some of the best known faces... in the world...
Imagine being in some small town somewhere in Colombia, just doing what you're doing there.
And then you come across Jeremy in hotpants.
The guy looked like a backpacker
Have you ever seen pastier white legs before?
I had to pause it, I was laughing so hard.
I honestly thought that adding medical grade oxygen to the Jeep would cause the engine to explode
It's gonna take a lot more than that to kill one of those 4.0 I6's. Those do not die no matter what you throw at it.
They run badly longer than most engines run.
There’s always something to fiddle with or repair, but they really are workhorses and you can repair them with some bubblegum, a ballpoint pen, some wire, and a little ingenuity. There’s very little that will keep it from driving.
The last one I messed with had spent the last six years parked in someone’s back yard, having been towed there after breaking down (overheated). The city noticed it back there and said it needed to move, so I told them I’d get it out of there one way or the other.
Repaired the pressure bottle (a crack caused the overheating issue that caused it to be parked in the first place), fixed the fuel pump (it had crystallized and frozen in the bad gas), drained the leftover crud out of the gas tank, yanked one of the relays that wasn’t sending electricity to the fuel pump, and wired the pump to a different wire under-hood that lit up when you turned the key on and filled her up with gas.
She fired right up. Put her front end up on ramps and bled the air out of the pressurized coolant system (hate those old closed-loop coolant systems), and drove it away. It passed emissions the next day and its new owner has been daily driving it ever since.
Not enough credit is given to the audio guys. Loving the classic rock covers in Spanish.
Yeah, someone should give the audio guy a hand.
Kiff!
Just watched the "Top Gear vs the Germans" yesterday. They're doing a challenge with double decker cars. Kiff was driving one with Jeremy.
Really cool to see that the Top Gear crew came with them.
The Fiat Panda could become James May's "Oliver"
He had a Panda in the past, and I wouldn't be surprised if he brought this one back to the UK and fixed it up. It's a pretty cool little car.
The whole special was super wholesome and not offensive in any way to Colombia - they did a really good job of capturing how beautiful and diverse this country is. Argentina is probably pissed about such a marketable portrayal.
well, showing people talking about their sexual intercourses with donkeys isn't particularly wholesome
That's not really the guys fault that these people choose to fuck donkeys, now is it?
But certainly educational
tbf argentina ruined it for themselves for trying to kill the crew over a numberplate
Not even the whole country, some idiots in Tierra del Fuego. They rode through most of Argentinia before and had a great time.
I noticed James was smiling for half the special in his Panda. I think he fell for it quite quickly. I really do wish the special spent more time with the car bonds they formed though.
He was always fond of simple, honest cars and the Panda is just one excellent example.
I think you meant “I, I love...ya!”
That car is still actually a legend in Italy, beloved by everyone used a lot also in the new versions in countryside and mountains... Was a recurring joke moving them when the owner was away, one time my friends moved mine on the parvise of a church 4 steps high...
Honestly. The Panda was really special.
I like the James -Jeremy “friendship” that fist bump was hilarious.
Later when they said we don't do fist bump. I laughed so hard.
Holy crap, have Jeremy’s legs seen the sun any time in the last 30 years?
That shot of Clarkson walking with the very short shorts was more disturbing than the shots of a man fucking a donkey or Hammond taking a shit.
Sun can't get through denim
That football match
The man with the hook hand also appeared during the Germany vs Uk top gear episode as a driver in the stacked cars. And it’s nice to see Wilman on camera.
"Kiff the one-armed sound man"
“He once fought a shark! He lost, but anyway!”
They managed to play a game of football without more than one rock being thrown at them at any given point!
Legit question: What was the deal with Jeremy at the end? Did his car break down or was there something else?
It seemed like the camera was just a lame excuse
His car obviously broke down, that's the joke about them saying it didn't.
I doubt it. That was a short road. That was just a set up bit to end the show. Jeremy parks, Richard and James get the hippos, Jeremy arrives, "oh. Well I guess we're done here."
It was a lame excuse, and that was the joke. The car obviously broken down or even falling over the bridge thingy May mentioned... they just joked over it, pretending nothing happened. Hammond said “first time all cars arrive without any problem” as a joke
First time one of the cars hasn't broken down.
That Vote Brexit sticker on the Panda
I wonder if the people they buy the cars from for these trips ever see the episode with their car.
Yes, not the owner of the truck but a guy in Ohio said he saw it all the time.
I always wonder about the guy who got his mitsubishi shot to shit by the british army in that one episode of top gear
He's probably still in jail.
"Ever since your last accident, you've lost your bottle."
Damnn
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Definitely. That was one of their best episodes.
I dunno. I thought the dune buggy special was pretty damn good, especially racing along the beach.
Dune Buggies in South Africa. Who says no?
It was Namibia, not South Africa
the dune buggy special got bogged down with so much filler in the first part all they did was drive up and down and get wet. maybe the jokes have ran a bit dry for me because this didn't feel all that good part 2 seemed a bit better and less forced.
that fucking bear, man
damn that hail was crazy, i don’t think we give them enough credit for the dangerous stuff they deal with to entertain us
Clarkson on that scissor lift looked super dangerous too. Seemed like the whole thing could tip over any minute.
Jeep fans will be happy
LGBJEEP community.
Had some slower bits, but overall probably one of their best specials ever. I get why they did the soccer game, just wish it was shortened up some since the hippo part felt rushed. Was great them not showing the Jeep breaking down whist they were talking about it.
As a professional photographer that uses much of the same gear the guys used in this episode, this special was an absolute joy to watch, even more so than usual.
The amount of cringe from Hammond switching lenses was off the charts here!
AFAIK he's actually a decent Photographer. He had his camera with him on the Botswana trip IIRC.
Jeremy carved a cock into Hammond’s tailgate!
OMG the bird caller. 😂😂😂
That feeling when pt. 2 of a 2-part special drops while you're watching pt. 1.
:)
Edgar Hussein
I'm kinda bummed that we didn't get to see a real condor
The Condor is extremely rare in that area of South America, I'm surprised they managed to find a dead one, which I think was actually just a vulture. All the other animals were all found at reserves or parks specifically designed for them.
I will forever call lifted pickups “trump trucks” from now on.
Most appropriate name.
“The Bear is shitting in the woods!”
That bear was seriously cute
Technically it's still episode 2.
Stop I can only get so erect
It's listed as ep 3 on Amazon.
“THE BEAR IS SHITTING IN THE WOODS!”
Can Jeremy confirm if the Pope is Catholic?
I feel like ep 1 was just a huge build up to a crazy part 2. It was fun, but there’s so much left for them to do.
It’s raining men.... I’m in tears lol
Can we just recognize that May has bought the best car of the three.
His electrics were out because of Clarkson pulling him into the sea otherwise it did surprisingly good for cheap hatchback.
Fiat Pandas are hard to kill, you still see hundreds of them in Italy
That was gold
That first bump was epic! I hope Hammond brings that step ladder on all their trips
The Pablo story rofl
So apparently this was filmed along with the other episodes of last season. Why is this special so much better than everything else in last season?
It wasn't filmed with the rest of the episodes last season. It was supposed to be for season 2, but between Hammond's accident and Jeremy's pneumonia, they had to delay filming. This episode was filmed last January.
Alcohol induced pneumonia. Definitely not a series of hangovers.
Seems like they refer to Pablo as a “ local businessman “
Thanks captain obvious.
I believe he was in the forest products business
Apparently he was also in the export business too.
I'm actually disappointed the suspension didnt break on the Silverado. I wanted it to have the same catastrophic failure as Hammonds Land Cruiser from the Bolivia special
Excellent special. Honestly, it's up there with the best ones. A lot of genuine moments, beautiful views, hilarious jokes, some cool MacGyver moments (really loved the pickup-turned-bridge scene) and the theme of the show (taking photos) remained consistent throughout the whole thing, with a great payoff showing all of them in the credits.
Sure, some of the jokes were telegraphed since they were mostly reused from previous specials, but.... I laughed, smiled all the same, so I can't really chalk that up as a negative. I was also impressed at the tenacity of the boys for still tackling all these crazy and dangerous challenges. Honestly, considering how much they've already done, their age, their general condition and Hammond's accidents... no one would've blamed them if they just stopped altogether, but the fact that they are still going at it, I think it's extremely respectable, and shows how much they're commited. I think they're well past the point of "doing it for the money", which I recall being a common criticism for Grand Tour initially, since some of the early episodes were still a little clunky, trying to adjust to the new format.
So yeah, top notch entertainment.
I can't believe Jeremy said the crew went through 6 Landcruisers!
Well he did say it
Cracked me up to see the progression of Jeremy and Richard messing with James' Fiat Panda. At one point the car is on it's side and the crew + James tip it back over, without really mentioning it.
We once carried a friend's old Fiat Punto a few parking spots over. You could tell it fucked with his mind all day long until we finally burst out laughing when he mentioned it.
I'll just put my opinion about both parts here cause, well, it's one special for me so...whatever.
The build up was a bit slow, some moments felt pointless (on top of that volcano), I still don't know why they put lipstick on some chubby, middle aged men...but...I enjoyed it.
It was fun, it was entertaining. While it is a car show I still enjoy the panorama and the nature shots and everything...and those shots were outstanding. The humor was on point most of the time...watching those 3 is just so much fun.
I take it. Well done.
The lipstick is apparently the best way to attract Hummingbirds (presumably because they like bright colours), at least according to the locals.
Humming birds are attracted to colors that react to ultraviolet. Like flowers or magenta lipstick.
Colombia looks great. Like, no really, one of the best looking countries they've been to.
Haven't laughed so hard at TGT episode in a while. I love these 3 idiots.
Awesome special, reminded me of peak TG days. I know it gets said often, but these guys are absolutely fearless. You couldn't pay me enough to drive over those shoddy bridges, especially in Hammond's Trump truck. Jeremy also looked badass during the thunder scene when he was standing atop that elevated contraption.
Anyone else think the ending was a bit odd
Hippo segment felt a bit rushed, but it wasn't too odd, knowing them and all.
I lost it with Jeremy’s pants.
I can't do it guys. I'm half way through and I can't keep watching. I'm laughing way too hard. Hammond's pots and pans with his self-facing cameras "That's the most important part" and the fact that it sticks 20 feet higher than a truck that is already monstrously high. I'm just dead with laughter.