Q&As

We went to Subway where my husband and I each ordered a pretzel and my two nieces each ordered a footlong sub sandwich. I am the only one who got a drink, which they promptly handed me an empty cup and a straw to fill myself. When we checked out they added an automatic 20% tip which equaled $8.51. I was indignant and made them remove the tip. I said I do not tip where I have to stand to order my food, get my own drink, and clean up after myself. I should add that I live in Washington State, minimum wage is $16.28 an hour, the tipping pressure is real here, and there are more than one place that has the automatic tip set to 20% unless you see to change it. Which may have been the case, but I did not see where I could have changed it before they charged me. Tell me, am I the asshole?

So I'm (22m) my wife is (21f) we have been together since childhood, we have been dating since I was 17, problem is she met with an accident when she was 11 and since then she couldn't walk, we are working on it but it isn't promising at all.

So we got married 8 months ago, my family and hers and our friends all joined us, my family criticised me for marrying so early and being rash, I have 2 elder brothers they are 2 years apart, and one elder sister who's 4 years older than me.

They attended my wedding and I thought they accepted her, but a few days ago, we had a family dinner cause finally my eldest sister was going to get married, everything eas going good, we joked around, drank, ate, danced etc etc.

My wife was sleepy, so I took her upstairs and put her to sleep, she can't handle alcohol at all, I came downstairs and after a while,Out of nowhere my sister said that it's better if my wife is not present in her wedding, I thought it was a joke so I laughed, she said she was serious, I asked her why, she simply said that 'she want me to be beside her and not carry my wife around'

I was like what?? She's not a burden she's family, and I told her that, she said after that, she accepts my wife, but I will end up paying too much attention my wife instead of being with her, and it's only reasonable that a brother should always be with her sister during her wedding

I just said I will always be with her, she doesn't have to worry about my wife, that's when my brothers came in, they said that I have done 'enough' for my wife, and it's time for me to do something for my sister, they said I should've married another woman, instead of a 'burden'

I looked at my dad and he just gave me a sign to calm down, but my mother joined as well and told me that my siblings are right, my wife shouldn't join the wedding cause I won't pay attention to my siblings and wedding and keep taking care of my wife.

I finally lost my cool, after hearing all this I went sober, I said if my wife is not invited, then I'm not invited either, I said I'm leaving, as I was going upstairs, to wake my wife up and leaving, my family stopped me and said I'm being unreasonable, I said I'm not in the mood rn, if I hear another offensive word, I'll do something we all will regret.

So I just grabbed my wife and went back to home, she asked why we left, I said I got urgent work in the morning, my boss called me on short notice, she bought it, but my family keeps saying I was in the wrong for threatening them.

So aita for the way I reacted??

I’m (20F) abroad for a summer program, and we’re living in student apartments. Several of us went out to eat, and started discussing dating apps.

My friend’s (20M) roommate started talking about how people should have to post their weight on dating apps, because guys are expected to say their height. He then said there’s no reason a woman should ever weigh over 150 lbs.

As a 6-foot-tall girl signed with a modeling agency, I weigh 175 lbs and I’m skinny. It infuriates me when men said women should weigh 130 lbs or whatever, and be anorexic. Especially when they think it’s okay for them to weigh more because they’re a man.

This man is definitely over 150 lbs, more like 200 lbs, and he isn’t even as tall as me. I guess he thinks only men care about weight when dating and that women don’t or something. I asked him, “How will that help you on Tinder, as a fat man?”

Then him and my friend acted like I said some great offensive insult, as if he didn’t unknowingly call me obese.

about calling my coworker Mary my work-sister after she tried to call me her work-husband in front of the entire office. A lot of you are asking for update, but that sub does not allow me to post update, so I am writing it here. Thanks everyone for your comments and giving me confidence that I did not do anything wrong or inappropriate.

As I was sitting in office the next day, I knew things would be a bit awkward between Mary and me. Mary ignored me the whole morning. Initially, I was planning to go and apologize to her, but after the post, I decided that I do not need to do that as I should be the one who was offended. Everyone in the office could see that we were acting weird, and I heard some people gossiping about us. One of the ladies also came to me and asked me if I want to talk about Mary and me.

Around 3pm in the afternoon, I was sitting in my office working. Mary came into my office and closed the door behind her. She was angry at me and started saying that I need to stop being an asshole and stop ignoring her. I told her to sit and to talk about what is going on. She told me that she feels humiliated, and everyone has been starting at her the whole morning because of what I did. I also stood my ground and told her that I was ok with her making fun of me but calling me her work-husband and hugging me in front of everyone for a long time made the situation awkward. She told me to get over myself and that I should know exactly what she meant.

Mary said that I made a big deal of what was supposed to be a joke and made it awkward for everyone. She said calling someone work-husband is a normal thing and just means that she knows me intimately like a spouse would. She said that because we spend so much time travelling together, she knows all the intimate details of how I behave outside work. I stopped her and told her that I felt offended by the term "work-husband" because I have a wife and I do not want people to use that term to describe our relationship. I told her that she would not understand as she is single, but as a married man, I really do not want anyone to describe me as a husband in any capacity.

She said that I am again misinterpreting what she was saying. She felt that as we have known each other more time than I have been married, she knows me more intimately than even my wife (I have no idea why she feels that way) and I also behave like her husband when we travel together. She went on about how we go out to dinners together after work, how I always insist on having breakfast together in morning (to plan our actions of the day), and I walk around in my underwear (referring to my gym shorts) around her in mornings. She also talked about how we spend hours talking to each other during road trips and how I am the only man she can trust with any secret in her life. She said that I am the definition of work-husband, and I am just in denial. I was a bit angry at this point. I told her that I do all that because I consider her my friend and she is delusional if she feels she knows me more intimately than my wife. I told her I do not want to hear that term again and it is extremely disrespectful to my marriage. Only one woman gets to call me her husband and that is my wife. Moreover, if my actions are giving her such ideas, maybe we need to stop being friends.

She became apologetic afterwards and told me that she did not mean to disrespect my wife, and it was not her intention. She apologized to me and told me to just let it go. She said that she loves travelling with me and she does not want anything to change between us. She again said that I am misinterpreting her statement and just wants to move on. She came to hug me again, but I just told her it was ok and stepped back.

I also talked to my wife about the incident that night. As expected, my wife was angry at Mary and told me that she hates the term work-husband. She asked me if Mary has ever flirted with me during our trips or has a crush on me. I truthfully told her that I really have not felt that way and she may have just said that because she was a bit drunk and is now being stubborn about it. My wife said that she feels a bit uncomfortable about Mary now and says that it's strike one for Mary and I need to try and put more distance between us while travelling. If she every repeat the same behavior again, I should report her to HR. I promised my wife that I would try to reduce my interactions with Mary outside work hours and be more guarded around her.

My dad dropped the kids off last night and while I was giving the youngest a bath I started to get dizzy and nauseous so I called my fiance to get her out of the bath and in bed. He got her out of the bath and gave her a towel then focused on me. That set her off so she started her hitting/kicking/pushing and when my fiance let go of me to grab her, she was able to push me over and I cracked my head on the edge of the bathtub. It was a mess. My fiance called 911 on his phone while using mine to call my dad to get the kids. I hurt my head and neck and will be in the hospital for the next few days. My when my dad picked the kids up my fiance told him we won’t be watching them anymore unless we become their guardians.

I (16m) have two dad's. One died before I was born; daddy. He was my non-bio father and his best friend was my parents surrogate. She's my Aunty Giga. My dad is my bio parent and my daddy's widower. And yeah, I say dad and daddy, and still say daddy as a 16 year old guy. Dad always referred to daddy as... daddy to me so I use it.

A month before I was born daddy died. My dad changed completely that day. Because of where we live, even back then, my daddy was still able to be recognized on my birth certificate. It was a fight and involved the courts. But it happened. It was really uncommon back then but he won the case thanks to Aunty Giga and other family members recognizing my two dads.

I grew up always knowing about daddy and I always cherished the connection to him. I was always glad my dad won the right for both of them to be legally my parents. I was also always treated like their son, not just dad's or not dad's and Aunty Giga's.

When I was 4 my dad tried to date again and he met Sam. They dated for about 3 months but dad wasn't ready and Sam didn't like what he saw. He felt jealous and insecure that he wasn't being brought in as another dad for me.

They reconnected when I was 8 and got married when I was 12. My relationship with Sam is complicated and weird and he wants to adopt me. But I don't want him to be my dad, I don't want to be adopted by him or to have him take care of me if I become an orphan. He has always made it a point to bring up the fact daddy wasn't my bio father in the first place and how legally it was a miracle he's even on my birth certificate. I hate it. It feels so gross. He has told me at least I'll know him while daddy is someone who's just saintly in my mind because I wasn't allowed to process only having one parent. Even though I know I was raised by one parent. But I still had two. He just wasn't here. But I read the book he was putting together for me. He documented a lot of the parenting journey and surrogacy stuff and the pregnancy until his death. He was so excited. He loved me so much. He wanted me so badly.

On Father's Day we had a big fight over adoption. Dad was out and Sam brought up the adoption to me. He told me he's tired of feeling like an outsider because I always treat him like dad's spouse instead of my stepdad or my parent. I told him because that's what he is and he has to learn to accept that. I told him nothing changed for me. He told me it's stupid because I love one stepdad so much more. I told him daddy is more than just a stepdad and then I told him I don't want him to adopt me ever and bringing up daddy isn't winning me over. I told him if anything he's making me wish dad had found someone better. Dad doesn't know what happened but things have been tense since and Sam said I went too far.

AITA?

So my mom and my sister live a state over, around a year ago my moms home flooded and she needed a place to stay until the insurance fixed it all. My sister lives near mom (30 minutes away) and mom went to her first for a place to stay. She refused and basically told her to kick rocks. They had a good relationship before this. She won't even let mom stay for a few days so one of us could pick her up.

I drove 7 hours to pick mom up and she stayed with me for two months until her home was good. The family was pissed at my sister and it resulted in a discussion about how she never helps anyone out. Everyone has experience it at some point where she didn't care enough to help out. My biggest example that pertains to me is when my car broke down and my sister refused to pick me up so I had to walk home and hitch a ride home ( this was before Uber took off). I got home and she was on phone deadscrolling. Everyone in the family has examples.

We all decided to not help my sister anymore. This is the issue now, she needs a place to stay since she is moving to a new city and her lease on her home ended. So about a month to stay with someone beofre she can move into her new apartment in the city. Everyone has turned her down.

She called me and asked if she could stay with me. I told her no and she started crying why the family won't help her out. I told her that their are consequences to not helping out our mom when she needed it.

She called me heartless and hung up

I (34F) told my cousin (22F) I wasn't interested in attending her wedding as she revoked my +1 because I'm getting divorced.

Some additional context, this is my first time seeing my extended family since I left my cheating husband 7 months ago as we lived overseas.

Last year at around the same time as the wedding, we visited my family in the U.S. because my dad died unexpectedly and we were very much together and he appeared to be a loving, supportive partner.

We're now very much in the divorce process and it's pretty brutal.

When my cousin reached out 6 months ago to tell us her date and informally invite us, I informed her we were getting divorced and explained his infidelity and betrayal, she supported me and was a lovely supportive person.

I asked her to bring my best friend of 15+ years as my +1 instead since my soon to be ex-husband was invited. My cousin and ex met once or twice in total and my cousin and her partner didn't know my ex that well and likely just received an invite as my spouse.

Several months later, I reminded my cousin again about bringing my best friend instead of my ex when some wedding event was happening but she didn't answer about replacing my ex for my best friend for 5-6 weeks, I told my best friend and we made plans for a really fun weekend where I was now looking forward to the wedding versus dreading it.

Wedding invitations were mailed last week, I RSVPed on the website and added a note to remind my cousin of my best friend coming as my +1.

Today, about 6-7 weeks out from the wedding, my cousin informed me that I could not bring my friend as my +1 instead of my ex as the list was tight and there were no longer extra spaces. I respectfully expressed my discomfort about coming alone considering how it's my first time seeing my family since my ex and I separated and that she had already accounted for my ex in the number count with the initial invite. The ceremony and reception is in a larger venue and is not a sit down dinner. It's pretty casual, all things considering.

When she stood firm, I said I was no longer interested in attending, not out of spite, but out of protecting myself and my mental health and wished her well, couldn't wait to hear about it on another day and to let us know if plans changed.

I spent a bit of effort and money to fly from Europe, cutting my European trip early to come back and attend and arranged my whole schedule to be there. Everyone else attending lives local. And several likely won't attend the wedding knowing how flaky people can be and it's over a popular holiday weekend.

I was pretty proud of myself for having that difficult but respectful conversation but when I informed my mother, she expressed disappointment with my decision but I thought it was a mature decision to respectfully remove myself and not add any additional stress to my cousin so I'm wondering if I'm the asshole here?

I (28F) planned a family trip with my parents and my brother (25M). Before I officially booked the Air B&B that we would all be splitting the price on, I sent each of them the listing, showing how many bedrooms, what accommodations, etc. I made sure to double check with my brother as the house is only 2 bedrooms. One room has 2 full size beds, the other a king bed. I asked if he would mind sharing a room with me as 3 bedrooms in this area were harder to find. He said it was fine because we’d each have our own bed and asked me to book it. Once our parents signed off on it, I booked it.

When we arrive, before we even have our first night’s sleep, my brother declares he thinks he and I should alternate sleeping on the pull out couch in the living room. I say I’m not going to do that. If he doesn’t want to sleep in the room designated for us, that’s fine. But I’m not sleeping on a pull out on vacation when there’s 2 beds. I asked why he doesn’t want to share a room and why this didn’t come up sooner. He said we were adults and he was “too old” to share a room. I asked why he didn’t bring this up sooner. He said he figured I’d agree to the pull out situation. I said he shouldn’t have assumed or at least had a conversation with me. He kept insisting and I said no. If he wants to sleep out there our whole vacation, fine. But I’m not alternating when I paid for a bed.

Him sleeping on the pull out lead to several conflicts with our parents as he’d get mad if they came into the living room in the morning while he was still sleeping but as they pointed out, it’s the living room, a public space. If people wanted to hang out in the living room at night, he’d start bugging us to go into our rooms so he could sleep, as early as 8 PM. We’re on vacation, we’re going to stay up a little later and hang out. I always offered to let him sleep in the extra bed in the room but he refused unless I promised that I would sleep on the pull out that night. Which I didn’t do.

By the end of the (7 day, 6 night) trip, he was irritated with all of us over this. My parents and I feel that he’s the one who put himself in the situation and that there was an alternative to him sleeping on the couch but he chose not to. However, my brother is insisting that I should’ve swapped with him.

AITA for not sleeping on the pull out?

I told my boyfriend that I might be going to Thailand with my parents, and asked his opinion on certain swimsuits I should buy. He said that I cannot buy either of them because my breasts would "fall out" of them and that because I have an hourglass figure, I cannot wear it. He then said that he cannot give me "permission", to which I replied that I don't need anybody's permission if my parents are fine with it. He then told me not to disrespect him and that some things need to be approved by the partner. He's also said that I can only wear bikinis nd all when I'm with him, not when I'm with my friends or parents. AITA for telling him I don't need his permission?

I'll try to keep this short and to the point.

My son died in November.

He had epilepsy and was taking Lacosamide twice daily. His seizures started when he was around 8 months old.

The morning he had his last seizure, he was getting over a cold.

He went into the seizure while I was driving him to the store with me to get orange juice. After, we got back on the road, his head turned to the upper right(clear sign of seizure for him).

This is when I rushed to the nearest Clinic in town that was thankfully 1 min from us.

He was blue, they got him inside, and he began to talk again.

They were getting him an IV and he went into another

Mind you, we have had him go into to seizures multiple times in his short life and he always came out.

The only thing different this time was that he would go back into one after a min or so.

The ambulance arrives.

It's me, the two EMT's , and my son.

He goes into another and the EMT administers Versed to stop the seizure.

It immediately closed my sons airways and stopped his heart RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME.

They stared and let it all happen. They never moved.

No one on this ambulance was trained to intubate.

I've tried and tried to get lawyers to take this case to no avail.

I'm so lost right now and have proof they also lied on their documents.

Has anyone had an experience like this and successfully sued for wrongful death?

I(28M) was together with my ex-girlfriend(28F) for almost 2 years. Our intimate life was okay though I always wanted more. I wanted to be more aggressive, more adventurous with costumes and toy plays. On the other hand, she was fine with vanilla intimacy. I had a discussion with her about it once and once she refused, I respected her decision and did not ask again.

Last week, I was on her phone and searching for home appliances on her browser. I saw a local women forum on the open tab. It was this question: "those who are together with a good guy, do you regret it?". My girlfriend answered stability is good though she sometimes miss wild times and intimacy. I was baffled. She did not want to do these things with me even though she misses it. I confronted her and asked if she wants out to try new things without mentioning the forum. She answered no again and I told her about what I saw. She told me she certainly misses those things but will not do them with me. She could do them with a hookup, FWB or someone else but not me because I am a boyfriend material. I told her I am open to do these things if she misses it and she rejected.

I tried to understand her reasoning for days but could not in the end. I also came to conclusion that we are incompatible and part of me wanted to do these things. She was my first while she had many partners before me and I did not get to experience these things like she did. Aftermath was not pretty but it's too much drama, I do not want to talk about it here.

AITAH?

My MIL and I don't get along. I know she doesn't approve but thankfully my husband is on my side. We recently saw his side of the family for an outing and ended up eating at a hot chicken place. MIL likes food really hot. She usually gets things as hot as they can make them and then says they could be hotter. Her fave meals are ones she seems to be struggling to swallow. you get the picture.

I'm a baby when it comes to spice and MIL seems to judge me as being picky. At the restaurant you had the option of picking your spice level, so I picked "lite mild" and she picked "reaper" While we were eating I bit into a tender and my mouth exploded. It was one of the worst pains of my life and i began yelling for water, which was embarrassing since we were in public.

My husband couldn't figure out what was wrong but I saw his stepdad and aunt smirking at each other and MIL looking pleased with herself. When I could finally speak I said I know you did it, and she admitted to switching one of our tenders.

My husband began screaming at her and I saw red. I said what she did was assault and if she ever fucked with me again I'd call the cops. I said I'm not here for her amusement but because her son loves me, and then I was like oh so you like pranks and poured a vanilla milkshake on her.

MIL had no reaction to getting doused in a milkshake, but to be fair she has almost no reaction to anything ever. I probably could have socked her and she wouldn't have reacted. There was a lot of laughter from the table, but after the fact I heard some people felt I went too far or that I'm crazy.

I (17m) might be TA and I might be a big one but I wanted to get people's insight.

So my dad left my mom when I was 14 to be with his wife/the woman he was cheating on my mom with. My dad didn't want me to think badly of him but I did. He knew I did and he knew he couldn't change my mind easily. We always knew my parents would end up with shared custody until I was 17 at least (from experience the judges in family court will only stop enforcing shared custody when a kid turns 17 and speaks out, any younger and they insist on 50/50). I also knew mom would struggle on her own because while she did work, she never made as much as my dad. She also wouldn't get child support because of the 50/50 and it wasn't ordered even with the difference in income. So when dad pleaded with me to give him a chance to show he could still be a good dad and he said he would do anything for me, I told him to keep supporting mom and make sure she wasn't going to end up struggling while he got off easy. I told him she deserved that at least, after what he did, and that I deserved to see my mom doing well.

My dad agreed and he paid it as child support instead of spousal support or whatever it's called. It really helped mom and she actually went back to school so she could get a better job. Dad is still paying that money. He knows I appreciate him doing it and he also knows it's one of the only reasons I didn't just decide to say fuck him and never want a relationship again. My mom is also less stressed. She has mixed feelings about my dad giving her money when legally he doesn't need to. But she also knows this is the only way for me not to feel the need to help support her.

Where my dad's wife comes into it is this. She never liked that my dad paid this "child support". She never liked that I insisted on it for my dad and I to have a relationship. But now my dad's house is struggling a bit and some changes needed to be made. His wife's son and daughter were in dance, football, softball, karate, music lessons and an art class as paid extra curricular's. My dad and his wife also have a baby together. The wife's kids had to cut two activities because they can't afford it anymore. It pisses his wife off because if dad wasn't paying the money they could still afford those things. She told me I should stop obligating my dad to support mom because they need it more and my mom isn't their problem. I told her she and her kids are not my problem. She told me they're my family while mom is not her or her kids' family or my dad's anymore. I told her she and her kids are dad's family but not mine. She told me they need all of dad's money right now before more things need to be cut back on. I shrugged in response. She told me I was so callously flippant and it wasn't a good look to care so little about my siblings lives (only one of her kids, the baby, is technically my half sibling).

AITA?

I'm (22m) a twin and I have a twin sister Wren. When Wren and I were 4 our mom died from liver cancer. She was 30. I know that would be difficult for dad. Going from a happily married father of two to a widowered father of two with no family close enough (emotionally) for support would be a lot. But he was a better dad to my sister than to me and that started before mom died. It just stood out more after.

My dad was an affectionate and caring father to Wren. She was his little girl and her cherished her. If she fell he would pick her up, kiss her tears and clean her cuts. He was gentle and compassionate with her. When she was upset she could sleep in bed with him. He'd snuggle with her on the couch. He'd pull her out of school sometimes and take her for father-daughter dates. When she was bullied, he was riding the school hard to deal with it and he fought so hard for her. He went out of his way to make sure she was loved and supported.

Growing up I heard the words tough and strong a lot. I heard the word man a lot and I was still so young. He never cuddled me or kissed away my tears or carried me. He never even said I love you to me. There was nothing gentle about him when it came to me. He was rougher, harsher, he expected me to be tough, to be a man, to be strong. If I had a nightmare I was sent right back to bed. When I got bullied horrifically in high school my dad didn't want to know. There were times Wren and I would both fall. We'd both be young too. And even if I was bleeding more, she was the kid he comforted. It was never me. Not if it was both of us falling and not if it was just me. He never did father-son dates. The most interest he ever showed in me was when I could help him do guy chores, like moving stuff.

I tried to approach this with him on a few different occasions but I never got to finish. He always cut me off for one reason or another. It got to a point where I expected it if I tried. I moved in with my best friends family after I finished high school (at home). Wren lived at home for two more years. Dad only called me when he wanted something.

He did it again the other day and I decided this shit had to end. I told him I'm not a toy he can take out when he needs me and then discard me once I've served my purpose. I told him I'm his son, not his helper. And I brought up how he never says he misses me, or says I love you, he never ever showed me love or affection and I wasn't going to tolerate it anymore. Dad sent me an email in response (he emails better than he texts) saying I was being very harsh. He said I was never his little girl and boys are raised different. I replied I was never trying to be his little girl but I was his little boy and he should have shown me love too. He responded again that I accused him of discarding me like a possession which was unjustified.

AITA?

When I (25f) was 10 my mom died. When I was 12 my dad remarried. Dad's wife had an 11 year old daughter. Her dad had abandoned her. Dad went from being an okay but not great dad to me, to focusing so much on his stepdaughter that there were times he forgot about me. After one incident where he literally left me behind in a mall in another state, he acted like he felt so bad that he took me out as a sorry on his stepdaughter's birthday. From that day onward she and I could not stand each other and we really don't wish the other well, we both want the other to go away and we stay away from each other where possible. She told me I hadn't deserved an apology because she needed his attention and love more than I did. This happened twice more where dad would apologize and it would hurt his stepdaughter. But generally I got used to being the one he put last.

I put distance between us after I left for college and after a couple of years he realized it was happening and he begged and pleaded with me to try and forgive him. I told him how much it hurt for him to prioritize his stepdaughter so much. I brought up being left behind. The fact that he would promise me a certain gift and then get it for his stepdaughter instead. All the times he took off work to support her and would miss all of mine. I told him how it made me feel and that it made me not want him around after a while.

He made a big effort to be there for me in the last three years especially. And he was doing a lot better. He showed up a little more and took a more active role again.

Then during a lunch where he surprised me by bringing his wife and stepdaughter, we were talking about my upcoming wedding and he asked me to change the date, because his stepdaughter wants to book her wedding for this year and the only date is the same as mine. He told me I was willing to get married next year so I could still change it now and have time (my wedding is scheduled for December). I asked what he was talking about. His stepdaughter said dad needs to be at her wedding because he's giving her away and if I want him to do the same, which he already agreed, to, I need to change or he'll be going to hers. I asked dad if it was true and he said it doesn't have to be. I asked him if he would choose her wedding over mine and he said yes. So I told him to fuck off and forget about coming to my wedding. Then I looked into his stepdaughter's stupid smug face and told her to enjoy my dad since her own never wanted her and never loved her but at least mine had been good to me before her. I also told that that I hope my stepsister's dad came back and she dumped him for the real one since he dumped me for a fake.

Dad texted me dozens of times after the lunch saying I reacted too spitefully and his stepdaughter did nothing wrong and I made her cry in a cafe full of people.

AITA?

ETA: I booked my wedding date over a year ago.

My (25F) sister (26F) has always been the golden child. Our parents have always favored her and it drove me crazy growing up. Everything she did was perfect, and I was always in her shadow. Fast forward to today, she's getting married in a few weeks, and of course, it's this grand, expensive affair that my parents and I are paying for.

Here's the thing: my sister is a total bridezilla. She demanded that I, her own sister, lose 20 pounds to fit into the dress she picked for me. She gave me a list of demands, including quitting my job a month before the wedding to help her with preparations. I work in a law office and can't afford to take that much time off because we have a big court date coming up, but she wouldn't hear any of it.

To make things worse, she made fun of my boyfriend (27M) for not making enough money as a doctor and said he couldn't come to the wedding unless he got her an expensive gift. My boyfriend is in his last year of residency and is debt free, I'm super proud of him. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 4 years, and we don't have a lot of extra money for the things on her registry. Things including: A Hermes teapot worth almost $900 and a set of six Lobmeyr glasses that cost $1,125.

She and my parents also coerced me in to spending my savings, almost $20,000 from my high school job on her wedding, because it was a joint account with my parents and they said they would just take the money if I didn't pay for what my sister wanted. I paid the deposit on the venue, the deposit for the catering, half of the flowers, the DJ, the down payment for the band and I bought her wedding dress. I have less than $200 left in that account.

After one particularly nasty argument, over my sister wanting to change her wedding dress, worth 3k to one worth almost 8k, I reached my breaking point. I logged into her wedding planning account (I know her password because I had to log in to pay for the down payments and deposits) and canceled all the bookings – the venue, the caterer, the flowers, everything. I figured she needed a reality check and maybe this would make her see how awful she's been acting. I only canceled stuff I paid for.

Well, she found out a few days later when the venue called to confirm the cancellation. She exploded on me, called me every name in the book, and now my parents are furious too. They’re saying I ruined everything and that I need to fix it, but there's no way everything can be rebooked in time for the original date.

Honestly, I feel a bit guilty, but I also feel like she had it coming. My parents are saying I went too far and that I owe her a huge apology and should pay for the damages again, but I think they’re just as much to blame for spoiling her all these years. AITA?