r/socialanxiety

Last night, I (F 23) went to a concert with my friends. The general audience population was a little older as this band was big in the disco era of the 70s/80s. Growing up listening to them, I was so excited to go to this concert and see this band in person. I got some really cheap nosebleed tickets (~$30) and me and my four friends sat in the second row behind this older couple. I am generally socially awkward, and I tend to miss social cues when I’m excited. Throughout the concert, I was very loudly cheering and singing along, as well as chatting with my friends and laughing. In the middle of a slower song, this older lady (70s?) turns around, smacks me on the leg, and says “Can you be quiet?” I know that I can be loud and not notice and fail to realize when people around me get upset. (I think I might have some hearing damage?) I just said, “yeah, okay” and turned back not knowing what else to say. I can see how this may have come off as disrespectful. She stared at me for a few more seconds before turning back. I really felt like crying and shut down immediately, but my friends comforted me. I’m just at a loss. I truly was being myself and enjoying my time, but I can’t help but feel super guilty and like an asshole for ruining this couples night. The couple left early and I truly enjoyed the finale, but this is all I can think about. Did they leave early because of me? Did I ruin their night? I tend to find it hard to let go of things like this. Should I sacrifice my true self for the comfort of others?

I bought tickets to see this band alone compulsively because I really wanted to see them even though none of my friends listen to them or could go to the concert. Days/weeks leading up to the concert I would get random spurts of anxiety whether I should go to the concert by myself or sell my ticket. I flipped a coin twice to see if I should go or not and BOTH times it said I should go. So I just said fuck it and went alone. But not without some help from alcohol (Ik that’s not the best, but I was trying to let loose and not think about other people).

If any of you are contemplating going to a concert or to any event by yourself, just go!!!! It truly changed my perspective on my life and what I’m capable of. If you feel anxious or anything, you have the power to leave the situation. I’m so glad I went to the concert by myself. I had the most amazing time seeing a truly nostalgic band. Met some cool people in line/around me (one girl gave me a bracelet <3).

I’ve been so scared of doing things alone and being uncomfortable, but I need to embrace being with myself and being comfortable with being uncomfortable. A few years ago or even a year ago, I would never think that I would go to a concert by myself knowing no one and having a good time, but I did!!!! I’m really proud of myself and I hope this inspires people to bite the bullet and go for it! Experience life and don’t let the stupid voices in your head hold you back (they’re not real !!!)

I'm in the same place I was 3 or 4 years ago, and it's distressful. Seeing people my age, people who studied with me getting their jobs, working and studying, building a future for themselves while I'm stuck at home. It hurts, and I can't help but think I'm a failure, and I'm wasting my time on this earth.

Why is so hard for me? I just wanted to be a normal human being.

English is not my first language, and I learned all by myself. And What for? I'll never use it in real life, I can barely speak my native language without stuttering, I can't even take the subway to go to a museum I was willing to go, because I'm too scared to get lost.

I'm going to a group therapy session, but my therapist doesn't understand me. I tried everything.

I worked as a young apprentice in 2022, it was really hard for me, but I stayed until the contract was over. I did another interview in the same company and I got the job, I was full employee. I was so happy.

I had some ''friends'' who got the job too, but I quit after ONE WEEK. I cried every day my anxiety was so high, I didn't have a choice, one more time social anxiety made me quit my job.

I saw a photo of this ''friend'' today in his work, I got really sad.

I don't know what to do anymore.

Yep you read that correctly, was in an abusive relationship for sometime and after settled with the fact i didn’t want a relationship for a very long time, today i locked eyes with stranger who was very pretty and usually i’d just say damn shes pretty to myself and keep it pushing since i somewhat struggle talking to random women when i am attracted to them but decided i gotta buck up or shut up so through the gut churning feeling i mustered up enough courage to tell her she was pretty hahaha. Felt good and her reaction gave me a good confidence boost, pushing through that anxiety felt liberating too. Although i think thats enough human interaction for the day lol,

I’m honestly more curious than anything. I’m a 25 year old gay woman and have never done anything remotely romantic. Sometimes I really do want to but I’m also terrified of it and feel like I have 0 social skills. Apps intimidate me, but so does going out to meet people. I feel like I just don’t know what to say and how to behave and I’ll make a fool out of myself.

How do people with our condition date at all ? Does anyone have any success stories?

Wish me luck!! I have a speeding ticket and if the officer shows up I get a ticket which is fine I’m just scared cuz it’s court :(. I HATE IT HERE

(19M)My anxiety gets bad about certain stuff, mostly to do with my health and other medical problems. I watch Love Island with my sister and I was noting how some of the guys were just attractive and I noticed myself staring at certain features like their hairlines, how symmetrical their faces were and over all how good looking these guys are. Anyways I realized I was being sus and I got it in my head that this was how I found out I was gay and staring at these dudes meant that I was turning gay. I definitely freaked out, I realize I’m not gay because I’ve never been horny towards a dude or wanted to be physically close to one, and this makes sense in my head and calms me down momentarily. However, whenever I think about how badly I was freaking out about it, it causes me to have some doubt and feel like something is going on that I don’t know about. My anxiety does this with my medical issues(few that I’ve had) and makes me feel completely insane regarding rare and scary issues such as rabies, mad cow, cancer and what not. Any tips and have any of y’all gone through something like this?

Sometimes I'm scared to come off as fake to a friend, I don't know where it comes from.

I think sometimes I just don't want to talk at all but then I don't want to ghost my friend. I still don't say anything and don't force myself because I'm afraid to come off as fake.

I don't really know what's my issue.

I couldn’t fall asleep last night and only got 4 hours after a also having a physically hard weekend. At work on Monday I noticed my anxiety was so much less than usual. Even though I was tired it felt good like my brain was too tired to overthink. Anyone ever deliberately do this ?

Hello! I love watching movies. However, my social anxiety often makes it difficult to enjoy movie theaters because I'm afraid of being judged for my reactions. How do you cope with social anxiety in public entertainment spaces?

I am extremely scared of people. I feel terribly anxious even while walking on the street. I interact very little in my class. I don't talk even to my friends. The worst thing is that i am scared even of making eye contacts. Whenever i look into someone's eyes even by mistake it make me very anxious, my heart starts racing, i start feeling uncomfortable, lose my peace and calmness of mind and i withdraw from the situation as soon as possible. In fact even when i am not looking into anyone's eye, i constantly keep side-watching to ensure no one is looking at me. I am scared even of being looked at. My reactions to such situations are so intense that anyone can notice them. This has been creating a lot of inconvenience for people around me. They hate me for behaving this way. I don't do anything voluntarily. In fact i try very hard to stop this but the harder i try the worse it gets. I did not have this problem until 2 years ago. It developed after i had a depression episode. I am in therapy and it helped me with depression. I feel so alone, no one in this world would have ever had such a problem.

In person, I feel like I don’t know anyone with social anxiety. I see multiple people who are depressed but I don’t know anyone with social anxiety. I see shy people but a lot of them are fine communicating with friends or family. Like my dad wants me to call & talk more but I cry if he says something that triggers me. I avoid calls but aunts or uncles don’t wanna accept it. I’m fine with text but they prefer call. A friend I had is distant because she prefers in person & I have to deal with that because I just prefer text. Most people around have friends as well. I struggle to communicate with anyone whether I’m used to them, close to them or not. I find others online with SAD but not in person. Anyone can relate? Is this disorder rare? I feel alone & like no one understands/empathizes with why I struggle to make friends or communicate with family :( They might be shy but they don’t have SAD. I’m so triggered by people, although I like people the triggers makes me isolate & withdraw. I feel judged all the time & overthink every single social interaction (including with family). It doesn’t help that my sister is naturally friendly compared to me. Also, I hate most jokes. I just don’t find them funny.

I want friends & to be more social but therapy is hard (because of the social anxiety). I did a few sessions & didn’t wanna return :( also I tried various meds & had headaches/diarrhea, I feel like because of my social issues I have depression. I do not want to be alive because almost everything requires socializing. Work, shopping, travel, sports, driving, school, church & (certain hobbies).

I’ve been meditating & journaling for a few years now, it helps a little �?�

would share your depression or anxiety to your manager, or boss, or any work teamate

I finished my first year of college without making any real friends. I've identified other issues, but the one I need the most help with is what to do when everyone around me has a group of friends already.

I've tried going to some campus events in hopes of making friends, but everyone I see is usually at the event with a group of friends, so I feel really uncomfortable aroudn them and don't really know what to do. I usually just end up quietly leaving or sitting alone. I'm usually ok with talking to someone one-on-one, and I'm also fine approaching a group of people if I know someone in that group (but I often feel like I'm intruding if I stay with that group for too long). It's just when there are groups of complete strangers when I start to shut down.

My main problem is that I want to make friends with people to hang out with outside of class, but it's very difficult to talk to people without feeling like I'm intruding if they already have their groups of friends. I was pretty lonely last year, and I really hope to fix that this upcoming year. I just have no idea where to go to actually meet people.

If anyone has any advice on what to do in these situations please let me know!

Not really sure what to call it instead of fired since its not actually a job. I've been volunteering at a charity shop for like 4 or 5 months now. I specifically applied to be in the back because I wouldnt have to talk to customers. Well, I thought I wouldnt.

In my interview I said I was autistic and I found out my manager was as well, so I felt more comfortable talking to him thinking he'd be understanding. But after a few months he pulled me aside to say that I don't talk enough and I should say hi and stuff to people when I come in and that its not that difficult. Im told to go out and put stuff in the actual shop a lot, and I was fine with it, I'd just avoid customers and do it as quickly as I could. But apparently moving past people even if you dont bump into them or anything is rude. He made a support plan that was literally just 'talk more'. So I tried to remember to say hi when the people working there would say it to me. They usually dont though, so of course I dont say anything either. I dont have anything to talk to them about. Theyve been working there for years and are like a close knit group and are talking all of the time and I'm just kinda there.

Today he said I wasnt talking enough and that if it kept being like this hed have to reconsider having me here. He brought up how I didnt say hi to the two other people working there that day. They didn't say it to me. After I got home I just texted him saying I probably shouldnt come in anymore.

This was my first experience of being around people again after a year of not leaving the house (which I've also mentioned to him before) and I wish I could just isolate myself again. It sucks already being paranoid 24/7 about people not liking me and stuff only to find out its actually true.

Every Afternoon - 1 tsp poppy powder / sometimes edibles Every Night - 240 ml whisky ( 4 glass ) Im close to heaven �?� I dont care if its gonna damage kidney/liver. Tried ssris/therapy/sober life/gym : nothing worked. Social anxiety >>>> Cancer

i quit my last job as a lab analyst bc all of my coworkers were really rude and mean towards me just bc i was “shy”, but at least it was a job i liked and wasn’t as socially demanding bc u basically work on ur own experiment unless it’s a team project.

i ended up finding a job as a medical representative in a different company and decided to quit the lab and join them on a whim without correctly weighing the pros and cons. the pros of leaving were 1. a better salary (almost a double increase) 2. leaving the toxic environment i was in 3. it’s a more well known company 4. it offers better opportunities for the future. the only con was that it required more social interactions but that’s a BIG con. i really did not think it through, in my head it was 4 pros vs 1 con when it’s more like 4 pros vs a death sentence.

my day to day job is terrible i feel like crying everyday, i have to visit several dermatologists per day to promote skincare products and it just makes my social anxiety worse, everyone said id eventually get used to it but honestly it just made me lose my will to live.

the funniest part is that i found myself in another toxic environment. most of these dermatologists are really rude and egocentric that ive been skipping some of them bc i cant handle it, my coworkers and manager absolutely hate and look down on me, we don’t work as much together bc i mostly make these visits on my own, but sometimes my manager comes with me & some other times i’d run into my coworkers representing other brands under the same company. there are also a lot of events we all attend together.

i really wanna go back to lab work, an office job, or better yet something remote. i’ve been looking for months in VAIN. there are no openings and if there is, i dont get a call. im seriously so suicidal at this point and believe my life is worthless. my social anxiety affects other aspects of my life as well but this is the worst bc it’s 5 times per week, 9 hours a day

She gave me so many chances to meet up. All I had to do was say hi but I became a mute. And now the woman of my dreams is with someone else.

I want to die, but said I’d give myself 4years

It hurts so much because of how stupid it is. I could’ve been with someone who I’ve always loved. I hate myself

I can literally note when I physically have my body turned away from someone just because they are there. I seriously want to get over this social anxiety it affects a lot of aspects in my life. Smoking weed doesn’t help, I know it makes me more anxious.

I want an open body language.

I went over my interactions from the day and notice how much I shy away or laugh everything off. Or a “yeahh haha”. I don’t give my honest responses, but when I’m home I know exactly how to respond.

Also! When I’m at work, I feel the need to get it out the way to say hello to everyone so no one feels a type of way. I want to feel and act natural. I feel like a sore thumb sticking out and really messed with my mood.

Please anyone give any advice or articles that could help.

Can anyone share their experience of using dating apps?

So, I've been isolated for many years now. All I did was going to school and coming back home, repeated for many years. There were only sporadic occasions where I did something alone or met with "friends" irl.

I have kinda finished my education and stretched it as far as I could, I got my master's degree. I've had only worked for like 2 months (as part of an internship). It was supposed to be a 3-month internship but I literally quit after 2 months because I was feeling so overwhelmed, incompetent and generally anxious that I couldn't feel anything other than anxiety.

So now I have to find a job somehow, don't know whether I should just try and yolo it and see how it goes (worst case I'm going to bail out again) OR maybe try some medication (of which I'm scared af --- of their side effects to be precise). Well anyway I was approaching that day for many years, I was being scared of the future at first but now I'm a bit calm in the sense that it either works or I can just get a rope.

How do you do ? I have idea's "dreams" to do things that involve social interaction and I am overly anxious, shy, afraid of judgement guy so I just don't do thing my anxiousness takes over and I am like nah I am good I don't want to do that.

And I see online people doing stuff but they are so much anxious and almost cry but they still do it because it's dream and it's good thing.

Why I don't have that type of culture. I just can't take risk. I know I have to take risk.

I can't even express my feelings or do things in my home because then I feel they gonna judge me. Why I am so afraid?