Over the week, my husband and I went on a camping trip before summer season with its glorious warm weather was officially over. We weren't at home and had no cell reception where we were. We left Thursday Sep 7 and returned on Monday Sep 11.

While we were away, my cousin left my neice still strapped to her car seat outside my house door on Friday Sep 8 and sent me some text messages. Remember, I had no cell reception where I was camping. I would never have known while I was gone.

I saw the missed messages after I returned home. It wasn't a request to ask if I can help her. It was simply a message notifying me that she left my niece in front of my door along with a bag with her stuff for the weekend.

She did not ask me beforehand if I could help her babysit. There was no possible way for me to know. Even if I knew, I would have still declined unless it was a medical emergency in the family and they had no other choice.

I live in a rural area where everyone is on 30 acre plots of land, so no one knew my niece was there. I had no clue. The neighbours had no clue.

My niece was literally abandoned in front of my door until Saturday noon when my parents came by to drop off my parcels that were delivered to their house. That's when they saw my niece.

My parents called my aunt and had her come pick her up. I can only assume that my parents, my aunt and my grandmother scolded my cousin for leaving my niece at my door.

When I got home, all I saw was the initial text message telling me that my niece was dropped off at my place. Then a string of very rude text messages and voice messages from my cousin calling me irresponsible for leaving my niece outside and endangering her. Because what if the coyotes in my area attacked the helpless infant.

I'm just so frustrated.

I(33F) going to pre-face this by saying my six years old daughter's father(37M), I'm going to call him Jeff, has never been my romantic partner. We had a one night stand. I don't like people calling him my ex, since it makes it seem we had some kind of emotional attachement. He was never involved after I told him I was pregnant, and actually wanted me to terminate the pregnancy, but I decided to raise my child alone since I have enough money to raise her without child support.

For the whole pregnancy and the first four years, Jeff was not in the picture. On my mother's recommendation, I did send him pictures and invited him to special events, but he always replied he had no interest in my daughter. Two years ago he reappeared and began demanding parental rights. When I didn't do what he wanted, he sued, and was told no, he was not getting parental rights. He was given the offer to pay child support and then we can revisit giving him actual rights, but he has refused. He has the money, much more than me, but he refuses.

I still offered to let him see my daughter in a casual manner, no child support needed, with the agreement anything legal, medical, or educational will not involve him. He pushed the boundaries and we had a fallout. After that, we didn't hear from him for almost 6 weeks before he called to meet for Christmas.

After much discussion, I agreed to bring my daughter over on the condition my daughter's godparents could come. Thus we went over for christmas dinner. And finding out Jeff is married and had never told his family he had a child. It was great to be judged by a bunch of strangers.

It was uncomfortable the whole time. I'm going to use fake names, but let's say my daughter's name is Katie. His wife kept calling my daughter Gabrielle. Not the actual name she used, but it was that different to my daughter's name. The wife was also very physical, trying to pick up my daughter or parent her. I would block her or tell her to please let me deal with my child. The whole time she pretty much ignore me, but Katie didn't seem nervous so I decided to just bid my time.

I hit my limit when my daughter said she needed the bathroom and this stranger went: "Oh Gaby you need pottie? Let mommy change you."

My daughter hasn't worn diapers in a while now and she's more than capable of going alone to the bathroom. I immediately told her to stay away from my daughter and that we were leaving. The woman starting wailing that I was kidnapping her 'baby girl' and tried to lunge at me. Her in-laws got in the middle and hold her, consoling her and saying that we weren't leaving and for her to calm down like she was the victim.

At that point I just glared at Jeff and told him he better explain or I would be calling the police. He asked me to speak in private in another room and that I could just leave my daughter with his parents. No way that would ever happen. Katie's godparents took her with them despite the wife having a full meltdown.

Jeff and I spoke outside and he explained that he and his wife recently lost a daughter. I'm not going to give specific details on that, all I'll say it was sudden and nobody's fault. And as I can only imagine it had caused some psychological issues to his wife. Apparently he had the brilliant idea that having Katie pass as their lost child would help his wife. Without telling me. And that's why he wanted visitations and parental rights. He pleaded for me to leave my daughter with him for 'a little bit'. I asked him what was his plan when his wife 'heals'.

His response was disgusting: "Well, I'll just send Katie back with you and it will be just like before."

I told him he was insane if he thought I would let him use my daughter like that. What his wife needs is therapy with a professional, not feeding her delusions. And I would not let that woman within miles from my daughter. He told me I was being cruel and didn't know the pain of losing a child. I agreed with him, but reminded Jeff that my priority is not his family; it's my child. What he and his family do to work through their grief has nothing to do with us. I also told him to call his lawyer because I am making sure he never has contact with my child.

So that's what I'm bracing for. He's been blasting my phone since Christmas, but I can easily ignore him. My daughter and I are doing a small travel vacation.

This isn't an update, just something I feel needs to be said: My daughter is set for life monetarily. She has a trust and I make really good money in my position. If she was 18 right now, I could put her through college without a loan. She doesn't need child support for quality of life. If I could get child support and never worry about her father trying something, I would be suing him in a heartbeat. But after talking to a lawyer and realizing the risk, I've taken the decision that child support, or possible inheritance, is not worth my child's safety. SAFETY is always first.

1/6/2024 Hey Everyone. Happy New's Years. This isn't so much a real update as just letting people know we are home and safe. My daughter is spending the rest of her vacation with her godparents on another trip while I work on things. Moving might be something I'll be looking into, though that is a long term plan considering all it takes. I won't share too many details on what my lawyer is going to be doing but we are absolutely going to push for an RO. I might not post for some time. At least not until things settled. I do appreciate all the support and good advice. I'm taking a lot of it into account as I plan how to move forward.

So me (34M) and my husband (30M) do our damndest to not spend an abundance of time with my FIL. He's a cowardly narcissist who says "hot dog" unironically. Ever since I came into the picture almost seven years ago, we have simply not meshed. A great deal of that is due to the fact that I've spent those years instilling confidence and boundary setting in husband. FIL does not like being told "no". We literally got kicked out of a restaurant one time because he couldn't accept that they wouldn't give him a discount. So needless to say our interactions are nothing more than the exchanging of fake pleasantries.

So last week we're over there for our quarterly visit. The way these evenings typically go is that my husband occupies my FIL while my MIL tests out her new English vocabulary on me. This time, my husband is doing the bulk of the talking to both of them because he's excited about the new organization he's working with. FIL keeps trying to change the subject because it's been two seconds since the subject of the conversation was about him. My husband and my MIL both snap. I'm not entirely sure what they said as my Spanish is still terrible but it amounted to them telling FIL to stfu and listen. FIL gets obstinate and essentially tells my husband that no matter what the organization is, it'll never compare to the work he did in his youth. (FIL literally just hiked through Central America with a white savior complex until things got violent and he came back home). My husband understandably storms out with my MIL hot on his tail.

Awkwardness ensues because I'm chuckling at FIL.

FIL: He never spoke to me like that until you came along.
Me: I know. I'm so proud.
FIL: You've changed him.
Me: No. This is who he's always been. You just never noticed it before.
FIL: I know my son!
Me: What's his favorite color?
FIL: What
Me: What's his favorite color? It's the same one he had as a kid.
FIL:...
Me: Name two of his interests
FIL: They don't make any sense!
Me: Name 'em
FIL:...
Me: Here's an easy one. What's the name of the organization he's working with?
FIL...

This wanna be Bob Ross, granola eating mofo couldn't answer! My husband said the name of the organization like 5 times that night!

Me: You wanna know the sad part? My parents can answer each and every one of those questions. And they've known your son a fraction of the time you have.

Cue the screeching in Spanish. Being yelled at in a foreign language by a non-native speaker is a surreal experience. Obviously my husband comes in and yells back and it blows up even more. But the part that stands out is the fact that FIL still refused to admit that he just hadn't taken a genuine interest in my husband in years. Like bruh, you don't even know your kid's favorite color. Hello? Now my husband is contemplating going no contact and I can't blame him.

My dad passed away recently and it came to light that he named me as one of the beneficiaries on his life insurance policy.

My mom says that it was a mistake and that I am not supposed to be a beneficiary, just my mom. She wants me to file for the money and sign the check over to her.

I’m going to go through with it, because she is my mom and blah blah whatever.

But the insulting part is that my mom says I can keep $5000 from it to throw my wedding. I only have $2000 from my own money cause my partner and I are kinda broke.

Is she being entitled? Or am I? Or both of us lol.

Edit * the reason why I think it is a mistake is because my younger sister is not listed as a beneficiary.

Some updates: first of all thank you for the advice!! This has really given me different perspective on this money. I still have a lot to think about. At this point I’m thinking about investing the money in my name and then sending my mom and sister a portion the yearly dividends that I do not reinvest. Hopefully this will keep everyone happy .

To answer a few questions

1. my mom, brother, and I are all receiving a third of the payout

2. I think the policy was drafted before my sister was born, which is why she is not a beneficiary

3. my mom is also receiving his social security, the house, and savings etc. I did not realize that I was going to receive any sort of inheritance in the first place.

4. my mom is a good person and a good mom and we have a good relationship. I am worried this money will ruin that

I posted this in another forum but received a lot of comments telling me to post it here as well.

I(26f) live in a rented house with a single mother(30f) and her son(6m). I had another person living with me but they moved out and the mother moved in. I don't mind living with her and her kid. It's fine and we kind of do our own thing. I spend a lot of time at my boyfriend's place or working. Our work schedules collide so we really don't interact much but when we do it's fine. No issue there.

I want to start with saying that she clearly struggles financially but I don't think it's an excuse. I don't make lots of money either.

However I've noticed that my food would go missing or portions would be taken from it. I assumed it was her kid so I asked her if she'd stop him from eating my food. I was calm about it and she just said she would. It didn't really upset me when it first started. It started getting annoying when I'd get home from work and expect to have a meal's worth of leftovers in the fridge only to see it picked through or just gone. I kept bringing it up and she started getting annoyed with me bringing it up.

Just from observing them I realized that neither of them ever eat vegetables. And judging by the food that would get picked through and the food that would be untouched. Anything with green in it was avoided. Orange chicken would be gone but chicken and broccoli would be untouched. So I started putting vegetables in EVERYTHING. I find vegetables to be delicious. And anything green or not a potato does not get eaten. So I could mix some bell peppers into the food and it would be fine. I make a big portion of vegetables pretty frequently anyway so I just started putting it in everything I eat. If I had leftover mashed potatoes i'd pour green beans in and mix it up. If I had leftover cheesy/bacon fries I'd pour broccoli all over it and mix it in.

Usually my homemade stuff has vegetables in it but I started making sure everything did. I made a pot of mac n cheese(the kid's favorite thing) and poured in roasted brussel sprouts. Which is actually delicious to me and I'm eating more vegetables so it's a win win. She had been seeming annoyed but we were all home when I made the pot of mac n cheese. She was in the living room and saw me get out the brussel sprouts and was like "what are you going to do with that?" and I poured them in. She said I was being greedy and annoying. I just said "I like brussel sprouts" and that was it. She said "we need food" and I told her to go get some. Or stop buying only prepackaged things and your money will go further.

I think she sees this as some big act of revenge but I just simply want to be able to eat my food.

Also want to add that the sharing is not the issue. It's expecting to have food there and it's not. So often I'd be working a long day and get home expecting to have a meal's worth of food and it all be gone. Or I wake up in a rush and had my food ready to eat in the morning only to find it gone. So now I have to skip breakfast. If she would simply text sometimes "hey is it okay if we eat *food item*" I would know and know to make other plans. I would stop for food or know I have to whip something up when I get home. Also I think eating the LAST of someone else's food is crazy and rude. If someone makes a big pot of something and you ask for a serving, sure. But if someone made something and there is one serving left and you eat it without permission that is evil as hell.

Hello everyone. First thing is that this issue just happened this week and I am so mad that I am shaking as I type this. I am going to apologize up front if I ramble but I honestly can’t believe this actually happened. I’ve tried to condense this weeks activity into a single story but sadly, it turned out to be super long – sorry in advance. I think I have to put TLDR?

Backstory: I’m a single mother of 2 teenage boys and I live in a nice, quiet neighborhood at the end of a cul-de-sac. Every house on this street has a garage and I’m the only one that has a single car and parks in my garage. Almost every house on this street is a family home with at least 3 cars, but most have more. Some will park in their drive-way and some will park on the street. It’s never been a problem since everyone is considerate on how they park and no one has ever had an issue with getting in and out of the street. In addition, I tend to keep to myself. I’m not antisocial and I wave and say hello to my neighbors when I come and go from my home but usually when I get home – I stay home. So, I say all of this to give you an idea that I’m a homebody and my neighbors pretty much know that when I get home – I stay home. About 6 months ago, the house to my right was sold to a larger family that consisted of Dad, Mom, and 3 teenagers. The day they started moving in, I made a point to go over to the edge of the property to wave and greet them in order to welcome them to the neighborhood. They were friendly and I was happy to have such nice people to move in next door. Also note, this family used their garage for storage and thus parked their 4 cars in their driveway. I didn’t know it at the time, but their youngest son was just months away from his 16th birthday. Now that you have a little information, onto the story.

The players: Me is me, ND is entitled Neighbor Dad, NS is entitled neighbor son, and NM is entitled Neighbor Mom, and NP is the poor nice police officer.

Today is Monday afternoon and this story began last Tuesday. Around 6PM on Tuesday, I received a knock on the door and it was ND. Following is our conversation:

ND: Good evening, how are you?

Me (talking through the screen door): We’re okay. I’m sorry I can’t open the door but my youngest came home from school with a sore throat today and so I’m not sure what’s going on with him. How are you and how can I help?

ND: I’m sorry to hear that – I hope it isn’t anything serious. We are okay. My son just turned 16 a few weeks ago and I’m sure you saw the new truck we bought him.

Me: Yes, I did. It’s such a pretty truck and big! Does he like it?

ND: Yes, he does! It’s what he wanted so we got it for him. It is very big and that’s what I wanted to talk to you about

(Let’s take a brief pause here and understand that when I say this truck is very big – it is VERY big. It is an F350! I personally think its too much of a vehicle for a kid learning to drive, but it’s not my money so to each their own)

Me: I don’t understand?

ND: We have been having complaints from some of the other neighbors that his truck is so big that they can’t get around it when they are driving through and we’re afraid that it might get side swiped if he continues to park it in the street.

Me: Yeah, I’ve had some intense moments trying to get around it myself, but I’m sure he will get better at parking as he gets more experienced. I’m not sure what this has to do with me – I haven’t complained.

ND: Oh, I know you haven’t complained, which is why I was going to ask if he could use your drive-way to park since you don’t use it.

Me (very stunned at this): Um, I do use my driveway when I leave and come home. I can’t get to my garage without using my driveway. Besides, I have issues with depth perception and your son’s truck is so big it will take up most of my driveway and I don’t want to be responsible for any damage that might happen while it is on my property.

ND: Well, we will make sure that he parks so that it will allow you to come and go without any issues.

Me: That isn’t possible. The only way he can park to allow me to get around him is if he parks halfway on my lawn and that wouldn’t work because then he would damage my lawn. If you are concerned about his truck getting damaged then why don’t you let him park in your drive-way and then one of your other smaller cars can park in the street.

ND: We’ve already discussed that and we would have to park 2 cars in the street in order for him to use the driveway. It would be very easy for him to park in your driveway and I can assure you that it will not be an inconvenience to you. You don’t even use your driveway.

Me: I’m sorry, but the answer is no. I’m not going to be responsible for his vehicle on my property and I need to be able to come and go without worrying about someone else’s property.

ND (very upset at this point): You are not being very neighborly. I thought you were a nice woman. You don’t use your driveway and this would benefit the whole neighborhood.

Me (losing my temper at this point): Listen, I told you no and I DO use my driveway every time I pull into my garage and every time I leave. I’m sorry you don’t have enough parking for all your vehicles, I’m sure its frustrating, but its not my problem that you decided to buy a vehicle that didn’t fit your property. Now, while I also find it irritating to try to navigate the road with that truck in the way, it is public parking and so I deal with it. I will not have anyone else’s vehicle parking on my property. Now, if you don’t mind, I have a sick kid and need to get back to him! Have a good day.

With that I closed the door and then looked out the peep hole and saw him give me the bird before he turned to leave. I just shook my head and had to take a moment to understand that I actually just had that conversation. I then loaded my son up in the car and left to take him to minor emergency to get him checked out. All tests came back negative and I was told he probably had a run of the mill virus and to keep him home and do self-care. Was told to bring him in if he got worse but not to worry.

I went to work the next day and told my co-workers the story of my neighbor’s request and they were shocked. I had one co-worker suggest that I send an email to my HOA to explain what happened just to get it on record because it was such an odd request. I took her advice and typed up an email that day when I was at lunch and sent it. For those who want to know, it was just an FYI email – not a complaint email. It basically stated that my neighbor made a request to park on my property and when I declined, he got mad at me and I wanted it on record just in case anything ever happens. (so very glad I did!)

So, Friday comes and my youngest son has been home sick since Tuesday afternoon. When I got home Friday evening, I checked him and he had begun to run a fever and was complaining of several other things. I had been doing self-care with him since Tuesday and he didn’t appear to be getting any better. Around 7 PM, I decided to take him back to minor emergency and loaded him up in the car. I opened my garage door and I was absolutely shocked to see that very big F350 sitting in my driveway – BLOCKING me! I can’t describe to you how angry I was to see that vehicle sitting there.

(Now before anyone starts asking me how I didn’t know it was in my driveway, its because my street is very busy and cars are coming and going all the time and unless someone knocks on my door – I don’t bother watching every vehicle that drives up and down the street. The only window that can see my driveway are the ones in my Kitchen and I keep those curtains drawn and never look out of them).

So, I get out of my car and stomp over to my neighbor’s house and bang on their door. NM answers the door and this is the conversation:

NM (irritated and kind of angry): Can I help you? You are interrupting our dinner!

Me: Your son is parked in my driveway after I told your husband he couldn’t. I need to take my son to minor emergency and that truck is blocking me in!

[Its at this time that ND walks up behind NM and proceeds to talk]

ND: He isn’t blocking you in, you can get around him.

Me: No I can’t. You need to move that truck or I’m going to call the police AND a tow truck! I need to get my son in to see a doctor!

ND (turning to call for his son and then turning back to me): He’s not blocking you but I will have him move it.

Me: It doesn’t matter whether you believe he is blocking me in or not. He is not allowed to park in my driveway. No one is allowed to park in my driveway and if I find an unauthorized vehicle parked in my drive-way again – I’m not going to bother to knock on your door – I’m going to have it towed!

It was at this time I saw the son arrive at the door with his keys in his hands and I turned to leave and head to my car to wait for him to move it and I heard him call me that famous “B” word every woman has heard at least once in her life! I ignored him and headed to my car and watched as he got in and after some effort finally was able to back out of my driveway and parked his truck in the street a little way down the road. I was able to leave and take my son to minor emergency where, as we waited for several hours to be seen, I shot off another email to my HOA about what had just happened.

I want to advise, the HOA had already responded the day before that they received my email, made a note of it, and advised my property was my own and I could give or deny access to it as I wish. It was this email string that I responded to while waiting for my kid to be seen. Again, all tests administered to my son came back negative and I was told it was a run of the mill virus and he would be fine, the virus just had to run its course. I took him home and called it a day.

Saturday evening, my oldest started complaining of a soar throat and I was starting to feel poorly myself. My youngest appeared to be getting better so I figured that whatever he had, that we were getting so we stayed in all day Saturday and Sunday. Sunday evening at about 5:30 my oldest son spiked a fever and while it came down a little, it didn’t come down enough so I loaded him in the car and off to minor emergency we went. The only one I could find that was open on Sunday at this time was on the other side of town so I had to drive 20 minutes just to get there and we ended up waiting for 3 hours to just get in the door and then another 45 minutes till we saw the doctor. After a few more hours and all of his tests come back negative the doctor did state that she could hear some wheezing in his lungs and so she prescribed an inhaler for him to help him but basically told me the same thing that he has a run of the mill virus and to let it run it course. I had to drive even further to the only 24-hour pharmacy available to pick up the inhaler and we did not get back to the house until almost midnight.

Let me set the scene for you. My son is half asleep in the passenger seat and complaining that he just wants to go home and I am exhausted and feeling drained and having coughing fits myself and I’m just looking forward to going to bed when I rounded the corner and saw that truck sitting in my driveway. I couldn’t even pull in because he was blocking me and I also noticed that he was parked partially on my lawn. I was so mad I could hardly see straight. I googled and found a 24-hour tow truck service and explained that I had an unauthorized vehicle on my property that I needed towing. The woman said it would be about 30 minutes before they could get a truck there and I said that was fine. In the meantime, I walked my kid to the house and put him to bed and then quickly went outside and took a picture from the street to show how much of the driveway he was taking and that he was also parked on my lawn. I couldn’t understand why they would park in my driveway again after I had told them no and the only thing I could come up with is that since there had been no activity at my house for hours that my neighbors probably assumed I was in for the night and wouldn’t notice the truck in my driveway (this is pure speculation but its normal for me to be in for the night especially after 6PM). I don’t know if they missed me leaving or just saw me leave but figured I was home but it really doesn’t matter because I told them they couldn’t park on my property. It was about 12:30 AM when the tow truck arrived and I half expected my neighbors to come running but there wasn’t any activity from them and the driver left with the truck without incident. I went in, shot off another email to my HOA along with pictures and an explanation that I had towed the vehicle and then went to bed.

At 6:00 AM, this morning I woke up to someone banging loudly and rapidly on my door. I didn’t have to look; I knew who it was. I grabbed my phone, hit the video record button. Before I opened the door, I looked through the peep hole and saw ND and his son at my door. I opened the door and following is the conversation:

ND(very angry and yelling): Where is the truck?!!!

Me (as calmly as I could state while coughing). It was towed. You can call Such and Such Company to make arrangements to get it back.

ND: You didn’t have the right to tow it. You’re going to pay to get it back!

Me: I had every right to tow an unauthorized vehicle on my property. I told you not to park on my property and you did it anyways. It blocked me from getting in my driveway last night. I told you I was going to have it towed after the last time you parked without my permission. And I won’t be paying anything to get it back.

ND: You stole my truck “you f’n B” and I’m calling the police. I’m going to sue you!

Me (having enough of this): Go ahead. In the meantime, I’m sick and I’m going back to bed.

I closed the door and stood there for a moment. I looked out the peep hole and they were still there. ND started banging and was also ringing my doorbell non-stop. He knocked and rang my doorbell for another 4 minutes before he gave up. I am still recording all of this and I didn’t turn off the video he was gone. I turned and saw my kids standing there. The noise had gotten them up and I just advised that if they were still feeling ill, to just go back to bed because that was where I was going. Now I will honestly say that I didn’t think he would call the police, but he DID! It was about a half hour (I really wasn’t looking at the clock) that I heard the doorbell ring. I got up and looked through the peep hole and a police officer was there. I opened the door and had the following conversation.

NP: Good morning ma’am. Sorry to bother you, but we had a report from your neighbor. He is stating that you “stole” his son’s truck by having it towed from the street and we need to talk to you about this issue.

Me: Good morning officer. My neighbor is only telling you half the story. I had his truck towed this morning from MY driveway when I returned home from minor emergency. I couldn’t get into my driveway and I have already told him twice that him and his family can’t park on my property. This issue started last week and I have emails to my HOA, pictures of his truck parked in my driveway this morning, and a video of my neighbor’s visit this morning where he called me names and told me he was going to sue me and call the police. I can show you if you would like?

NP: Yes. So, you are saying that the truck in question was on your property without your permission and that you had it towed?

Me: Yes. Last Tuesday he asked if I would allow his son to park in my driveway. I told him no and he got mad at me and flipped me off before leaving. Then Friday evening, when I was leaving, I discovered his son had parked in my driveway and I couldn’t leave my garage. I went over and demanded they remove the vehicle and I told them at that time that I would have the truck towed if they parked on my property again. I came home late this morning and the truck was in my driveway – so I had it towed.

NP: I just want to confirm, you are saying that it wasn’t parked on the street but in your driveway. And you have proof of this?

Me: Yes sir. If you will give me a minute, I will print off the emails that I sent to the HOA that documents the issues and I will also show you the picture and video as well.

With this, the police officer said that he would wait for me to print everything off. Once I got the emails printed, I then returned to the door. Opened my photos app to the officer to show the truck in my driveway, timestamped. Handed my phone and printed emails to him. After looking at the photo where you could clearly see my house in the background, the truck blocking the entrance and that it was partially on the lawn, the officer then read the printouts. He handed my phone back to me and asked me to open the video that I had referenced while he went over to the lawn to look. I watched him look at the area and then take a few photos. I could see my neighbor and his whole family standing in their driveway watching me and the NP. NP returned and I handed him back my phone with the video ready and he watched it. After he finished watching the video, we had the following exchange:

NP: I am going to need a copy of that photo and video for my file. If I provided you with an email, would you be able to send it to me?

Me : Yes sir. No problem.

NP: I have enough information for my files to determine that the vehicle was not on public property and was in fact on your property. I’ve made a note that you did not give permission for the vehicle to be parked on the property. Based on the emails you gave me with dates and time, it appears you did in fact advise your neighbor not to park on your property. Would you like to file a trespassing report for this incident?

Me: Oh, absolutely.

NP: I can see you are not feeling well. You can either file with me now or you can go online. [getting business card out, writing on it, and then handing it to me]. Here is my business card with my email address that you need to use to send me your photo and video and the case # is on the card as well. Do you want to file with me now?

Me: Honestly, I’m exhausted and would prefer to file online later.

NP: Okay. Reference this case # when you email your evidence and file the online report. Also reference my name in the report. One more thing - I saw in the video where ND stated he was going to sue you for having the truck towed. He can sue you if he wants and I would advise that you keep all of the evidence you provided me with today along with the case # I just gave you. Give it a few days and you can request a copy of the report and you will want to keep that as well. If you decide to file an online report, you will need to keep a copy of that as well. I’m going to go talk to ND now and sorry to have bothered you.

Me: Thank you officer. I’m sorry you had to come out.

NP: Have a good day ma’am. Get some rest.

With that, I closed the door and went back to bed. However, I am so mad that I didn’t get any sleep. A few hours ago, I sent off my photo, video, and another copy of the HOA emails to the email address the police officer gave me and then saved all of that information just in case. I also filed a trespassing report online. I then sat down and started typing this story. Not sure where this is going to go, but I am going to see it through.

I know that I’m going to get a lot of pushback from people saying that I should have just knocked on their door and had them move the truck but I feel that I was right to have the truck towed. I had already told them twice not to park on my property and it didn’t stop – so this was the consequence. I will post an update later if there is anything that comes of my report or if ND does actually follow up on his threat and sue me.

If you read all of this, thank you and again, I’m sorry for the length.

Update: OMG, this thing blew up and I'm just amazed. Thank you everyone for your comments and awards. I had posted this because I was second guessing myself and thought maybe I had let my sickness and anger outweigh my judgement but your comments have made me feel more secure with the decision I made. I have so many comments that I can't respond to everyone so I wanted to address a few repeating comments that I saw:

#1. This is a real story and if you don't believe it, then that's on you.

#2. Yes, I live in a quiet neighborhood and my specific road is busy. There are 12 houses on my street. Busy road doesn't mean noisy. I guess I caused confusion when I said I was at the end of the the Cul-de-sac. I'm the last house right before the cul-de-sac starts, so I consider myself at the end. Cul-de-sac doesn't mean no traffic, I still have neighbors and guests drive by and the cul-de-sac is used as a place to turn around. As I previously stated, I'm the only one on with a single car. This is a family neighborhood and there are lots of cars that drive in our area and on our street. They are residents and guests.

#3. Cameras. I don't have any cameras and I will have to save up to get some and based on the comments I will make that a priority. I have to budget to get extra stuff. My neighbor across the street have cameras and I'm almost certain the front of my house is covered by them. There is no way they can cover the front of their property without getting the street and my front yard covered. This doesn't bother me and when I'm feeling better, I will go ask them about the coverage.

#4. I did take a look at my HOA paperwork and it does mention that street parking is acceptable but only if it doesn't impede traffic. I'm assuming that since some of the neighbors made a complaint about the truck, that the HOA must have said something to him which is why he was trying to use my driveway. This is purely an assumption.

#5. For those telling me I should have damaged the truck in some way - I just can't do that. Was it wrong for them to park on my property - yes, but that doesn't mean I have to be like them. I'm satisfied with just towing the truck and the report I filed. If things don't escalate then I will call it a win. If they do, then I will certainly respond. Don't misunderstand me, I'm not a push-over. I will not start anything or escalate anything unnecessarily - but if they escalate I will stand my ground.

#6. Yes, myself and my oldest are still sick but getting better every day. My youngest was able to return to school this morning.

Thank you all again for your support and I will certainly update you when I know anything else.

Update 2: So I know a lot of you have been wanting an update, but I wanted to wait until I got a copy of the police report before I did, which I got this afternoon. Sadly, it didn't go anywhere. I was kind of hoping that he would have a false report charged against him, but the report states that NS told ND that he parked it in the street in front of my house and that is why ND called the police. The NP had questioned both of them after he spoke to me and that is when NS said he had lied to his dad and had actually parked in my driveway. I guess they don't believe he did it intentionally, so no charges were filed and the report was closed. I don't believe it but that's how it goes. The trespassing report I filed has not been closed yet. I was told that if he is convicted that it is just a misdemeanor and he would have to pay a fine, maybe 10 days of jail, and/or community service. Also, it would be the son who would be listed as the trespasser and since he is a minor, I'm not sure where that will go. But, I discovered that if he is convicted then I could use that to have a protective order done. Will have to follow up later on the trespassing.

So, I am getting a lot of messages asking about the truck and if there has been any retaliation. Yes, the neighbors got the truck back and no, I don't know how much it cost them to do so, and yes he is still parking in the street but he is parking it further down next to the entrance of the road. As far as I can tell, they haven't done anything to my property and they haven't said anything to me since that day; although, I have gotten some pretty nasty glares and looks from them when I see anyone from their family.

I was amazed by how many offers I received from all of you to help me get some cameras. This has touched me greatly. I would like to say thank you for the offers, but I am okay. I was able to talk to several of my neighbors and I found out that my neighbors that are 3 houses from me may have been the reason that he asked to use my property. I discovered that the man who lives in that house tried to leave for work one morning (he leaves at like 4 AM) and he couldn't get around NS truck. So he bangs on ND's door until ND finally got up and went out and moved his son's vehicle. I don't know the details of the conversation but I know there were angry words and a veiled threat if NS truck kept being a problem. Other neighbors confirmed they had made complaints to HOA, but HOA wasn't really helping. Apparently, some other people on the block have had other issues besides the truck since he has moved in and so this family isn't well liked before this whole issue. Word has spread about what happened and now there is a "watch" going on. I have told everyone that I would just like for things to die down and have asked that no one instigate or does anything on my behalf.I told a couple of my neighbors about this post and one of them has a reddit account, so she said she was going to follow the post. And no, I'm not going to post a photo or video because I don't want to risk starting anything. If there is a chance that I can go back to my peaceful existence then that is what I want to do. If you need that information to prove this story is true then you are free to not believe it.

Also, I wasn't clear when I was talking about emailing my HOA. My HOA didn't do anything but log the complaints I was making and tell me that my property is mine and that they can't do anything about what they consider a "civil" matter. The reason my emails to the HOA were so important was because they contained date/time of the the information and that matched what I had told the officer. My HOA really isn't very good.

In addition, some of my neighbors have cameras. I spoke to the lady across the street and her cameras weren't very helpful. They are at an angle and zoomed in on a bird bath in her yard (I guess she likes to watch them) and wasn't meant for security. However, the neighbor beside her went out and adjusted his cameras (he has a lot of them) and was able to cover most of my front yard and part of the side that faces him without sacrificing coverage of his property. It doesn't get my whole yard but he was able to get the driveway. So anything going forward should be caught. I still plan to save up for some of my own, but now it isn't such a big priority. And the retired man down the street knocked on my door yesterday and gave me his phone number. Told me if I got a visit from anyone from that house again to call him and he would come take care of it. and that he would make sure to keep an eye out. So I am feeling very blessed to have these neighbors.

I again want to thank everyone for their support and I don't really have much else to update except for when the trespassing report plays out, which I don't know how long that will take, but I will certainly update once I do. I wish you all the best of everything and again - thank you!

Final Update: So first off, I want to apologize for taking so long to update. I've been waiting for the court date to be over before updating and for some reason it got postponed twice before finally getting settled yesterday. I'm going to try and make this a short update, but no promises, LOL!

While waiting for things to progress, I discovered from the neighbor across the street that NS had been caught parking in one of the neighbors down the street's house and I was able to get a notarized statement from that neighbor about the incident and was able to include it as supporting documents on my report. Sadly, I was disappointed with the outcome at court because it ended up that he got a fine of $150 and that was it. Judge did stress that he can't just park where he wants and to be kind to his neighbors. I would also like to add that I personally haven't been bothered by that family - other than dirty looks when we're both out at the same time. Furthermore, I found out that he and his family either found this post or was told about this post and are very angry about it and have mentioned that I am slandering him and that I lied, but he hasn't said anything directly to me. I also have been able to save up for a camera system and my ex-husband came over and installed them on my house and he made a very big show of doing it - so I now have eyes on my property when I'm not looking.

There are two good things that have happened. The first is that, after NS was caught parking in the other neighbor's driveway, the family started playing "musical cars" with all their vehicles. They had been constantly moving cars in and out of the driveway in order to accommodate that huge truck and it has been watched with delight from the entire street. I think it finally broke ND because about 2 weeks ago, they got rid of NS truck and replaced it with a much smaller truck that can easily be parked in the street. So I feel like this is some kind of victory in itself.

But the BEST thing that has come of this whole thing has been the older man down the street. He's the one that I mentioned in my last update that he gave me his phone number and told me to call him if I had any issues. I never called him but I came home one day and I noticed that my yard had been mowed, weeded (is that the correct word?) and edged. I've never seen my yard look this good - I certainly don't have the skills to do that! I was shocked and I was thinking that maybe my ex-husband had taken pity on my and did it - even though I knew that was far fetched (I had to beg him for weeks to do the cameras!). Before I could get settled in, someone knocked on my door and when I answered the door - it was the older man. He said he had seen me out pushing the lawn mower around and lugging around a weedeater that was bigger than me and since he had a riding mower, he decided he would save me some trouble and mowed my yard. I thank him profusely and tried to pay him and he declined the money and told me he liked doing yard work and he didn't mind helping me out. So I took him over some Chicken Spaghetti that night and he tried to refuse the meal and I told him I enjoyed cooking (I don't really) and that I wanted to show him my appreciation. This man is a widower and doesn't have family in the state so he's mowed my yard regularly until it turned cold and I take him over meals at least 3 times a week and he has even come over for dinner a few times. I've talked to him in some form almost every day. I had a leaky sink and he fixed it over my protests. I lost my grandfather several years back and I have missed him greatly and this man reminds me of my grandfather. He tells my boys stories of his time in the Military, about his kids and late wife, and gives them advise (he regularly used ND and his family as a "not what to do"), and he has become almost like my 2nd grandpa. Thanksgiving is just going to be me and my boys this year and so I invited him over for Thanksgiving and after much begging and persuading - he has agreed. I'm going to invite him for Christmas as well and I have socked away some extra money and we are going to make sure that he has a present under our tree this year. I guess I should go thank ND and his family cause their entitlement made it possible for us to have some "family" for the holidays. Thank you all for your support and concern and don't worry about me anymore - I got my 2nd grandpa looking after me!

Looking for experience and opinions. All are welcome.

I’ll try to make a long story short. I am an only child and My current boyfriend and I have been dating for 6 years, starting when I was 19 and he was 20. We met at junior college where we started dating and after that we went to different UCs but within an hour of each other.

My parents met him early on by joining us at dinner, everything seemed to go well. Then soon after, we went to his parents house who live about 2 hours from my parents so I could meet his family, and after learning this my mom told me how hurt she was that we didn’t come to see them too. I expressed that this weekend was for me to meet his family, but it was clear that she felt almost betrayed.

Fast forward, my parents invite me up to our cabin and my boyfriend joins, we take my car because it was already loaded with laundry etc. After we arrive, my dad pulls me aside and pretty much quietly yells at me how wrong it is that I drove and that we took my car. “He’s the man, he should be driving” blah blah blah. This started everything going forward on a sour note. The cabin is in Tahoe, (it gets cold in the winter) so my boyfriend wore a sweatshirt with his hood up during some of the time at the cabin. My parents to this day, cite this as weird and rude as well as a reason they don’t like him.

As we continue our relationship it’s clear that my parents don’t like him, but they can’t really give up what I would call good or justifiable reasons. They’ll say he’s just not a good “fit for the family”. They don’t tell me to stop dating him (because they can’t, I’m an adult) but they do tell me that I need to keep them and him separate. They don’t want to really hear about him and he’s not welcome at their house or cabin. he’s never cheated on me, abused me, he has no drug problems etc. nothing that a normal parent would cite as a problem.

Eventually it became an ultimatum given to me by my parents. They’d tell me that if you continue to date him, eventually it will be either him or us and you’ll have to choose. Among other things they would tell me that he’d never be an attorney, which is what he wanted to do, and insinuating that he probably wouldn’t be much of anything at all.

After undergrad I started working at a financial firm. He graduated from undergrad at UC Berkeley and was accepted to law school across the country. We were always very serious about each other and made the decision to do long distance until he graduated and moved back to Ca.

My boyfriend has since graduated from and Law School, moved home, and took the bar last month. He starts work this October, and had a contract since last year. They have known about this as well.

Now, 6 years into our relationship I call my parents and tell them that we are going to be moving in together. About 20 minutes later I get a text, from my mom, saying that she doesn’t want to rain on my parade but that this “path” excludes her and my dad from my future. That they love me but they can’t be in my life if I choose to be with my boyfriend. I told them I would never understand. Since then, they have sent me more and more text messages saying stuff like “we feel like we’re losing our daughter” “this is heartbreaking” etc. and all at the same time including that this is “my choice” and my fault. I texted my parents that I thought my boyfriend and I should come over and talk, that texting about this kind of thing is stupid, but not to be patronized or belittled and if it turned to screaming that we would leave. My parents then replied that they wanted to see me face to face to talk but that my boyfriend isn’t allowed. My boyfriend even called my father the night of the initial “we can’t be part of your life” text to try and talk or meet up and see if there was a way to talk through any legitimate concerns. My dad did not answer and responded until a week plus later, only to text him that they haven’t really ever liked him, that he wants to work through it with me alone, and it’s mine and my boyfriends fault for not trying to address things earlier.

Among other ridiculous “reasons” to not like my boyfriend were “Berkeley isn’t a ‘man’s’ college.” - my dad. One time in college, my professor lost my final exam, and when I found out via my final grades and was frantically calling her to figure out what happened, my parents told my boyfriend “see this is why we didn’t want her to have a boyfriend in college”, they’ve found ways to blame him for everything. The only thing that ever had any merit was that he wasn’t working yet. Well, this was because he was going to school to be a lawyer. (apparently marrying someone who will make a lot of money is a bad thing?) My boyfriend is the nicest, most calm and peaceful person ever and he loves me more than anything. But apparently their pride is more important than being wrong and accepting him.

I guess I’m just trying to figure out if this is normal? Or if it’s as wrong as it feels to my boyfriend and I.

**boyfriend as well as my parents and myself are of the same race. Somewhat similar financial status as well. **no important details left out, I promise. I wanted objective feedback. Believe me, if there was more, my parents would make it known to me and I would have included it in this post.

Every November I (24 F) receive a dreaded text in our extended family group chat from my cousin (35 F). The text includes a highly detailed Christmas list from her 5 year old, who we’ll call Penny. The items are ALWAYS expensive, obscure, and very hard to find. Additionally, she expects us to reply with the item we have purchased then sends back the updated list with that item checked off. Each year there’s exactly the number of items for people in the chat, and once people hurry to claim the cheapest ones you’re left with $100-$300 items to choose from. My cousin is an only child and her mom caters to this, as well as her dad, but the rest of us are getting pretty sick of it. Last year someone didn’t follow the list and said they’d already bought something else in the group chat and she responded that “isn’t what Penny wants this year” which made them feel guilty for not adhering to this insanity.

Now some backstory.

Penny has autism, is non-verbal, and the sweetest child ever. My cousin and her husband are good parents for the most part, but they are a little self focussed. For example, they are both collectors of things like manga and toys and lose their minds if Penny touches their things (and the home is FULL of their collections). They have an entire room dedicated to this, which they call the ‘fun room’ and their daughter isn’t allowed in. Not so fun.

Now here’s the kicker. The items on the list are almost always part of a collection. Either vintage certain edition this or that, and tons and tons of Beanie babies. They have started a toy collection similar to their own for Penny, but it’s a lot of things I’ve never seen her enjoy or show much interest in. One year the most excitement she showed was for the box, and she LOVES Disney movies and paw patrol but never has she gotten gifts related to these things. Also, we suggested some gifts like a toy kitchen or something interactive and sensory and they shut that down in favor of expensive Lego. Star Wars Lego? She’s five. I know damn well that’s going straight to daddy’s ‘fun room’.

This year I’m getting her an Ariel doll and matching dress. I’m stopping the madness.

I am a full-time, stay-at-home mom, not by choice. We've moved three times in one year and spent the last two years renovating our own house. Again, not by choice. My days went from being 24 hours long to 16 hours long after 3.5 years.

My kid gets 1 hour of screen time a week. I make all her meals from scratch.

I have no village.

This weekend, my husband went out of town on a boy's trip. My mom called and asked how I was doing with the "extra work" and I've come to find that with my husband gone, my day is actually easier. The only difference is that my kid doesn't have someone to play with during the 45 minutes while I make dinner. That's literally it. I also have to cook one less meal because kiddo and I eat the same thing, but my husband ALWAYS requests something different. So without him, the only difference is that I save time by only making one dish for dinner.

Last night he mentioned that he's been watching our kid "extra" the last two weekends so I could have time for myself (as a "special treat" for mother's day and my birthday). Buddy, that's not doing anything extra. That's being a parent. And 45 minutes of playtime a day does not a parent make.

I used to think I was wildly unhappy because of the constant demands from motherhood but it turns out, I'm much happier doing this by myself. I thought my child was the reason I was struggling, but turns out, it's my husband.

Mind blown.

I just moved into a new place with a pool out back. Neighbor lady comes up to the fence the other day while I'm having a beer and doing some yard work. After the greetings and whatever the rest goes like this:

EM: The people who lived here before would let my kids use the pool in the summer time, they're really sad about not being able to anymore.

(Why guilt trip me? Just ask.)

Me: oh, well I don't mind, as long as you're there, I can't watch them.

EM: Well the last people would watch them because their own kids were there too. They'd just sit out back.

Me: ...okay, but I can't watch your kids, if they're going to be in my pool you have to be there.

EM: I don't have time! I don't know why you can't just sit there and watch them so they can swim..

I had no idea how to respond to this, she caught me so off guard.

Now I think I need to change the lock on the gate because I'm afraid she has a key and will send her kids over alone. I don't have a problem with the kids using the pool, but I don't want to babysit the kids of someone I don't know around water.

I (F 28) have a very overprotective mother. I also travel a lot for work.

Well my job had me coming into town so my mom could see me. I had a meeting after at the time I said I was done and texted her. She kept calling me during the whole meeting, despite me sending a message that I couldn't talk because I was in a meeting.

When I'm finally done and about to call her another coworker tells me that my mom is looking for me. She had came down to the place I was working wandering the outside looking for me.

When I called her she said she was in tears and worried over me.

The next day she asks if she can install an app to track my cellphone. I told her that I didn't feel comfortable with that and had hoped she would leave it at but she kept pushing it until I said no.

She keeps trying to coax me into getting it saying things like "I'll use it for emergencies." I said that was a slippery slope and I know her and it's going to reach a point where "Just emergencies" turn into full blown tracking my every movement.

She also argued that she's getting better at not being so protective because she's going to therapy, and I told her how about she asks her therapist what they think about her tracking me.

At this point she keeps bringing it up and I'm growing tired, I'm wondering I should give in and put an end to harassment. But at the same time I feel like that's enabling her.

I don't know what to do anymore to put an end to this.

I'm 20m, and his happened when I was 14. I have a brother that's about six years younger than me. And he was extra coddled by my parents for having been diagnosed with high functioning autism when he was 4. But other than that he seems very normal, just unbelievably spoiled. And he used that to get his way a lot. And by a lot I mean nearly all the time. Anything I had, he also had to have. So that meant we had doubles of almost everything that wasn't shared items. And anything he had that I didn't, he'd rub in my face any way he could. When I was 11 I begged my parents for a 3DS for my 12th birthday. I got one, but then was told to lend it to my brother whenever he wanted it, or else I'd have it taken away. Which it was, a lot. When my aunt found out after seeing my parents forcibly take my 3DS out of my hands to give to my brother on one of her visits, she let loose on them for such blatant favoritism. They returned my 3DS immediately, then blamed me for the situation after my aunt left. But they didn't make me give it to my brother again. Instead my parents went out out a few days later and bought another 3DS as a surprise gift for my brother.

On several of mine and other people's birthdays my brother made a huge fuss because the party wasn't all about him. Even going so far as to outright state that he was upset because he wasn't getting any gifts or getting to blow out the candles on the cake. My parents learned the hard way that they couldn't enable my brother the way they'd have liked at those parties. And were actually kicked out of a few for trying. And because of that, other kids at his school stopped inviting him to birthday parties altogether. For me, my birthdays were some of the only days I had that I got to have about me because otherwise my parents forced my life to revolve around my little brother. And the year prior to when this story took place, my parents ended up paying more attention to him the entire time of my 13th birthday. And even asked me if I'd let my brother blow out my candles for me because he was upset and pouting. I refused that because I wanted to blow out my own candles. They called me a spoiled brat at first, till my aunt intervened and chastised them on their favoritism yet again. And stated how much she had noticed how my brother gets nearly everything between the two of us just because he's autistic. My parents got no support from anyone else there other than my brother, who was still crying because he wasn't getting to blow out my candles. And because he didn't get his way, he tried to outright spit on my cake out of spite. But my awesome aunt thankfully blocked him before he got the chance. Then scolded him till he ran to my mom in tears. My parents took a lot of heat from the other adults there, and then promised to never ask me to let my brother blow out my candles again. But they pretty much just went through the motions for rest of the party. My aunt pretty much took over coordinating everything from that point.

The following year a couple of weeks before my birthday my parents sat me down and told me they were still gonna get me some gifts and a small cake, but my birthday party was effectively canceled to avoid my brother having another meltdown. I told them I couldn't believe they were doing this to me, and they just seemed to shrug it off without a care. So at school over the next week I told my friends, my teachers, and even my school counselor. All of them were appalled by my parents' lack of consideration or empathy. The vice principal even found out and consoled me. And all of this got back to my parents through social media. My parents ended up grounding and gaslighting me for telling so many people. But that didn't stop me from still telling everyone at school that I was grounded for just being upset my birthday was canceled for no good reason. I guess that made it a lot worse because several of my parents' own friends along with parents to other kids in my school called them up or sent them FB messages basically saying "What the hell is wrong with you!". And suddenly I was un-grounded. I didn't get an apology either. My dad just walked into my room with his arms crossed, told me my grounding was over early, and then walked out. That was it.

I thought my party was still canceled because nobody said anything about it. And my brother thought it hilarious and rubbed it in my face that I wasn't going to get to celebrate. But by the end of the two weeks my parents held a surprise party for me at my favorite restaurant. And then started claiming that was their intent all along. I knew it wasn't. From what I'd seen everyone was incredibly unhappy with them for what they did. And it showed with any interactions family members had with my parents. So they ended up doing the surprise party to try and save what little of their reputations they had left. But I'm pretty sure they had to pay through the nose that day to just accommodate me. I got dinner with all my friends at my favorite restaurant that had a small arcade. And even got the PS4 game system I'd been jonesing for at the time. I could tell it was all pretty much planned and bought last minute, because my dad had a look about him that my aunt comically described as looking like a moth had flown out of his wallet.

My brother of course made a huge fuss that I got that surprise party. But with so many of my friends and their parents there, my mom and dad finally put their feet down on my brother to stop his tantrum when he wanted to push my cake off the table. My brother ended up getting a time out for the first time since he was a toddler, and my mom had to stay with him to make sure he didn't do anything crazy. And he did try several times to run to the cake or stack of presents. Who knows what he would have done were it not for the fact at least one adult was always on guard. Even my dad stood guard to keep him away. My mom ended up having to remove my brother and herself from the party entirely and took my little bro to a McDonalds nearby so he could have fun in their play area. And I heard later she spent at least an hour trying to get him to come out of the playplace tube structure. And he only did so because he had to use the bathroom, then tried to run right back in again.

My parents never tried to cancel my birthday again while still I lived with them. Though they never again tried as hard or spent as much. For the remaining four years I was under their roof, my birthday parties consisted of a local pizza parlor, a cake without even my name written on it, and never again anything as expensive as a new gaming system. I don't mean to sound spoiled. But I was a bit disappointed I never got a cake with my name on it again. My aunt called my parents out on that each year, and each year they claimed they forgot to get the cake decorated. I'm pretty sure that the reason my name was never written on another cake was because my brother always refused to eat pieces of cake that had writing of someone else's name on it at any party. And they couldn't put his name on any of my cakes, or it would have looked very bad for them. But the fact that I still got a day that was just about me at all and not my brother was still fantastic in my book. Especially because just about everything else revolved around him. During each of my remaining birthday parties while still living at home my brother made a fuss, and my mom took him somewhere else to calm him down. I was still required to share my PS4 with my brother. But it was still mine. And I took it with me when I moved out at 18. Little bro did not like that, and had a huge fit till my parents went out and bought another PS4 for him.

When I moved out they finally had to deal with how they'd raised my brother so spoiled because I wasn't there to help them with him anymore. On his recent 14th birthday he went mental on our parents for not getting him a PS5. He is now currently grounded for I don't know how long after causing hundreds or maybe even thousands in collateral damage during his rampage. He picked up a chair and just started destroying anything that was in front of him with it. And my parents just looked mentally checked out when I saw them last. My aunt has also told me they confided in her that they wish they could send my brother to military or boarding school in the future because they can't handle the monster they created anymore. But there's no way they can afford that. I'd be lying if I said I didn't find it ironically funny.

Edit: Holy cow this blew up! I'd like to thank everyone who's commented and given me awards. It really means a lot to me. Thank you all so much!

Our household always revolved around money, even though my mom made more than enough money and we were not struggling by any means. She complained about every single thing she had to buy for us. Everything. Food, clothes, medical expenses, toys, laptops and phones, school costs, everything. We always knew exactly how much we were costing her. We didn't dare ask for unnecessary things like leisure activities or expensive toys or hobby supplies. We started working very young and she manipulated and guilted us to give her all the money we earned to "pay off what we owed".

When I turned 18 she completely cut me off financially (but kindly offered to let me rent my bedroom out from her) and sent me an invoice of every cent I've ever cost her, totalling over $700 000. She billed me for Christmas and birthday presents. She even billed me for her medical expenses for the pregnancy and delivery, and wanted me to backpay rent to live in the house from birth. She did the same to my sister 2 years later when she turned 18. We were supposed to pay her back over time starting the day we turned 18.

Both of us were still dealing with a lot of internalized guilt from her constant manipulation so we actually did pay for a while. Aside from necessary expenses, our entire paychecks were going to her. We rented our bedrooms in her house and she separated her food, cleaning supplies, cookware and tableware, etc from ours and charged us to use them. She generously included the use of the household appliances in our rent. It wasn't until I was 21 and my sister was 19 that enough people had told us this whole arrangement was unhinged that we finally snapped out of it. We moved out together and have stopped paying our mom, or even contacting her at all.

Here's an update -

I had posted this originally on "am I the asshole" and have been told that this would fit perfectly here, since my aunt is the entitled parent.

My husband and I are finally expecting our rainbow baby after years of infertility and multiple miscarriages. It's safe to say we and our family are very freaking excited! My mother is probably the most excited. She's been planning our baby shower and making decorations for months. She's been the biggest help during this exciting, yet scary pregnancy.

A few weeks ago, my aunt told my mother and I that my cousin is pregnant. We are very happy for her. However, my aunt said their plan is to announce her pregnancy at my baby shower, since we are having a big party anyways. She said it's not a big deal and we both can share the day. I said absolutely not because we have been waiting for this day forever, and it should be all about me and my rainbow baby. My mother is on my side and told my aunt that they better not announce anything at the party. My aunt dropped it, and nothing else was ever said.

Last Saturday was my baby shower! It was everything I've waited for. Everything is going good, no one has announced my cousins pregnancy. When it was time for us to eat my cake, my aunt said, "hold on, hold on everyone." and went outside to her car to grab something. That was the moment I knew something was up. My mother and I follow her outside, and my aunt decided to bring a cake announcing my cousins pregnancy, and some presents for my cousin. My mother immediately told my aunt that she will not be bringing those back into the rec center, and they will not be ruining my day. My aunt started throwing a fit, screaming "this is a baby shower, it's for babies. Cousin is having a baby too, so this day is about her too!" My cousin now joins the screaming and says how pissed off she is that everything is always about me and why do we always have to be happy for me.

They would not stop screaming, so they were kicked out by the rec centers security, and half our family was upset that I wouldn't let her have a moment at my shower so they left too. Now everyone is bashing my mother, myself, and rainbow baby on facebook, group family texts, anything at all.

edit: for those asking - A rainbow baby is a baby born after a miscarriage or stillborn. It's a term used to describe the joy/hope after the "storm" of losing a baby!

I was forced to have very long hair. I was told it was because my mother said her mother forced her to keep her hair short and she said it traumatized her.

I honestly felt like Rapunzel with my long ass blonde hair and not being allowed to change it.

I told my mom when I was a teenager that I was sick of my long hair and I wanted a change. She said absolutely not.

I decided to get my hair cut and donate the hair to charity. My mom crapped all over the idea, saying I was going to regret it and have a mental breakdown over the change.

I was an adult but I didn't have enough money for a car so I needed a ride. I asked my mom for a ride and my mom refused. So I got my dad to drive me.

She acted like I was going to get an abortion. She was so unhappy.

When I got home with my new hair, she never once gave me a compliment. She barely looked at me.

I loved my new hair too much to care what she thought, but it was shocking for a women in her 60s to get petty because I chose to do something for myself.

She thinks she owns my hair.

I wonder if she never said anything about my hair because she was mad she was wrong and that I had no regrets :)

Everyone else liked my hair. My dad wasn't happy with the idea but grew to accept it.

I just got a nice some of money from a lawsuit (i got hit by a car) and now my mom wants to keep all of it because she doesn’t trust me.

I’m 18, I’ve been saving up to move out and I want to use the 20,000 dollars to pay rent in a new city. My mother is trying every trick in the book to make sure that money goes to her and not to me. Calling the lawyer, questioning my competence, explaining she has the better bank, etc. She keeps insisting I’m going to go on a shopping spree with it all, even thought that’s what I’m sure she’ll do with it.

It’s so frustrating because she won’t let up and I just need to know how to get her to leave me alone. Should I just let her take some of the money and hope she’s honest about putting it in savings?

EDIT: Thanks for the advice everyone! So I’ve decided to go to a financial advisor on how best to save and invest it. I will not be touching the money for rent or anything.

I told my mother her plan and she was PISSED. I told her I wasn’t giving any to her and she said “we’ll see about that” don’t worry though I have no fears about her getting to it. She was never attached to my bank in the first place, not to the account and she goes to a different bank. (she used to steal my checks facepalm)

While I wanted to get out of this house as soon as possible and I had hoped the money would be my golden ticket out of here, I will be saving up till school starts in the fall. You guys were right about how if I used it for rent it’ll be gone and I might be fucked. Thank you all!

So I 27F am no contact with my dad and have been for about 5 years. I had him blocked on everything except email until a few weeks ago. I never check my email but on a whim I was looking through and stumbled on an email he sent me I little over a month ago. In the email he basically demanded that I talk to him and work out our differences...he essentially talked to me like I was 10 and he can just order his way back into my life. Then in the same email he threatened me saying if I don't speak to him he's going to take me to court for grandparents right to get access to my kids. On one hand I'm floored and so shocked that he thinks talking to me that way will make me want him back in my life. But on the other hand it's hilarious because I DONT HAVE ANY KIDS. Nor do I want them. What a clueless, useless, garbage person.

Edit to add. I'm thinking he's assuming I have kids because I was engaged when I cut contact.

Edit 2 Thanks everyone for the support. Yall rock. I decided not to reply but I'm saving the email incase I ever need it. I'm not going to encourage him to take me to court but if he does I'll absolutely update.

I had no intentions to do a new post, but today absolutely took the cake.

To those that don't know, my daughter (6yo) was born from a one night stand with Jeff. We were never romantically involved. It was a simple one night stand and we did use contraceptives, but they failed. It happens. A few months ago Jeff went full psycho and tried to convince me to leave my daughter with him so she could serve as a replacement child for his wife who recently lost their infant daughter. I refused and right now we're in the middle of some legal issues.

Now for today, I thankfully didn't deal with Jeff. Instead he sent a priest to harrass me at work.

I'm going to be very blunt, I am completely detached from religion. I'm not an atheist, just don't really like the idea of the Catholic Church (that's the leading religion in my home country). I respect it and most of my family is Catholic so I have a detached respect for church officials.

Today I was doing some paperwork when I got a call about a priest asking for me. I didn't have any meetings scheduled and a lot of times we get visits from clergy asking for donations or participation in events, so I figured that was it. I told the secretary to let him in and things at first seemed rather polite. Shake hands, asking how things were. The usual chit chat.

Then the priest began talking about how it had come to his attention that I was a single woman with a child, and that apparently I lived a life of debauchery and hate. His words.

I was taken aback and agreed I was a single mother, but that I didn't see how I lived in debauchery and hate.

The priest then went on about how he knew my daughter is prohibit from spending time with her father and that I'm constantly sleeping around with men instead of living a 'godly' life. How he was worried and thought it would be best I considered giving my daughter a chance to live with a proper family rather than see me sell myself.

Angry was an understatement. I did keep it civil simply because I was at work and I had no intentions of screaming to a religious man at work. I simply told him that my daughter was fine with me, she lived a safe and happy life, my personal affairs were my own, and that I had no intentions of sending her to another household. I told him that if there was nothing else, he should probably leave as I had other things to attend to.

He then show his hand and that's how I know it was Jeff's doing. The priest told me he didn't think my daughter would be a happy child with me, but her FATHER was well respected in his church and he knew he would raise a proper Christian lady. At that I laugh, and simply said 'no'. I once again recommended he left and if he didn't, I would be calling security.

He left saying he would try to speak to me again when I'm not being 'hysterical'. I told my secretary and our security not to let him into my office again. And I called my lawyer. I don't have audio, but we do have security feed from him walking into my office.

Thank you again to everyone sending well wishes in my previous post. We are still working on that move, but school is back and she's loving it. We still have that temporary restraining order against Jeff and his wife. And school officials know it.

Small update: I had a lovely talk with our local Bishop. This priest was indeed a real one, but the Bishop assured me I won't hear from him again. He was very apologetic and I am comfortable with how our conversation went.

Hi guys I posted this over at relationship advice. My update got removed so I will post the original story, as well as the two updates here as a big all in one story. Sorry for any gramatical and spelling errors. I had uploaded this story one time but it was removed due to my account being "younger" than 120 hours.

Edit : people have asked why I post this so much. The reason I just that I want to keep you updated. This is just a comprimed story of all what happened. The story on AITA was removed because it violated rule 8. And the mods on RA informed me that they had to remove it unless I can verify myself with some sort of social media. I just looked for a sub where I can keep all the beautiful people that supported me so much in the loop.

Edit 2: Guys i really appreciate you wanting to support us . But we don't need donations! We are luckily good off and have a support net around us. I appreciate the sentiment and am very touched by your support and that all I really need.

Also here is

Part 1

My fiancee and I have been together for 8 years and engaged for 3. I was doing my PhD program and was juggling planning the wedding. My fiancee took much of that work, but it was perfect because our dream venue was booked till after my graduation. So what we did is book our dream venue 3 years in advance. It is really a beautiful venue. The only slot we got was September of this year. My sister got engaged a few months ago to her fiancee. They were planning on having a spring wedding next year. They had no venue lined up, but had a few vendors lined up as well as a set date. 

Yesterday our parents invited us and our SO\`s to a family bbq, where my sister announced to our extended family, that she is expecting . Everyone was so happy for her and my BIL ( who is a great guy).My Nan asked my sister if the wedding was still on the set date or if they were going to wait, because of the baby She said no that she hoped to move it to September.NBD. We don't have many out of town guest so they could attend to both weddings no problem.Nan was happy and asked sister if she needed help planning such a short notice wedding .

My sister then turns around and said*"Thats what i wanted to talk to you about. I was really really hoping we could kinda like take your venue ? I really can not stress myself too much with planing a wedding while going to maternity classes. And i think it is so beautiful! It would really mean a lot to me"*.

It went silent. But everyone was looking at me expecting me to say

"yes of course everything for my little sister !". My BIL looked very uncomfortable and told her that they had talked about this and that it was not okay to put me on the spot . But my sister just said " *Don't be like that! My sister wants to do whats best for me so its no big deal right?"*I just said " well it kind of is. I don't know . I have my heart really set on the venue"Cue the crying. She stormed off.Nan told me that i was being selfish because she needed the venue more than I did.

I tried to defend myself and my mother said " you waited 3 years. Would it have killed you to wait a few more moths? When has your sister ever asked you for something?"A few comments later my fiance got really mad and we left. My sister called me crying and said that it was unfair that I always get what I want and that i could have done this one thing for her. Dad said it is just a venue and what matters is the person who you are marrying. He is kid of right... but we have been planing for so long .

My fiance is furious with my family and doesn't even want my sister to come. Now my family is threatening not to come because I am being selfish and my sister needs it more than me because having a baby is too stressful.

Part 2

My BIL called me and apologized for the inconvenience. He told me he had discussed it with my sister and she had told him she would not ask. He is properly mad with her now and warned me that my sister is blaming me for "potentially ruining her marriage".

My father has sent me about 5 text along the lines of"I hope you are happy your sister hasn't stopped crying since yesterday"And so on and so on. My fiance and I have decided to boot my sister from the bridal party and replace her with my aunt who is the only family member that took my side. We have not decided whether or not we will invite my family as a whole.Furthermore my mom took it upon her to tell on us. She called fiancés parents and told them, that it would be best if my sister gets it because she is pregnant and pre-eclampsia runs in the family. Whatever that means.

My future father in law told them to fuck off and basically ripped my Mom a new one for expecting something so ridiculous and that they were going to lose me if they keept playing favorites.So my mom is now crying too and saying that my father in law is an ass.This is just getting so pathetic. It seems straight out of a bad soap opera.My in laws are driving to us currently with some supper and wine and basically told me to not worry and that no matter what happens that they will be my safety net. I cried of happiness

Part 3

So it hasn't been that long. But this post blew the hell up. I was expecting only a few answers but the support was overwhelming.What boggled my mind is that this story flooded over to mainstream media.But let's get to the story.So since this went viral a lot happened.

My Sister

My sister saw this story while browsing on her reddit acc. She lost her mind. She accused me of painting her like a looney and misinterpreting facts. ^{(Info: My sister got wind of the situation due to various Media outlets and went on reddit} )

She said that I was being unfair. That she is family and that she asked it nicely because she loves me.She also underlines the fact that the opinion of internet strangers doesn't count because family is more important and I should focus on making my family happy.The only text I sent back was this.

I am sorry that you percived it that way. I did not in any matter distort what happened. As you might notice I didn't describe your tone nor exaggerated anything. Perhaps you have that night different in your mind than I do, but I digress.

I am sick and tired to bending to your will. My whole life I have been your servant and your doormat. Remember all the birthdays I had to share with you because you would throw a tantrum because you didn't get presents? Or when you cried so that I would fill out job applications for you? But the thing that has hurt me most till now is when you ruined my graduation.

I am done. I admit that I also spoiled you but I will not any longer. If you want to marry so bad before your baby is born then you could look at [hotel x] that offers last minute weddings. I have spent too much time planing MY wedding to gift it to you.And if you want to ruin our relationship over this then go ahead. I will sleep sound and safe knowing that it wasn't my fault.

She only sent me awow.... You must love me so very much

And blocked me. She unblocked me this morning to sent me this

My ParentsMy parents haven't actually written me since the thing with my father in law.My older brother ^{(yes I have an older brother but he lives in another city and wasn't at the BBQ, that's why I didn't mention him. Plus he initially could not come to the wedding because of work and changed his plans after hearing about all the story})

Contacted me and wanted to know what happened because he got a weird story from mom and dad. Mom had told him that I had offered previous to the BBQ to give up the venue to my sister and that I humiliated her

I told him what really happened and he had no problem believing me. We talked a lot about our parents behavior and he confessed that him moving was partly due to our parents being, and I quote, shit heads to us.He told me that mom had gotten wind from the post and was mad at me for betraying my family.I haven't written my parents what so many of you adviced me to because I have to come to terms with the fact that they love my sister more than me (if they love me at all)

The wedding

We sat together and put passwords with majority of our vendors and also with the venue directly. ^{(we didn't talk to our planner yet which is why the text of my sister worries me so much})

Also we canceled the catering that my parents paid for. So short term we won't be able to get a full catering like we wanted to. But all our friends and my fiancés family will help us prepare a buffet (and everyone is going to chip in). That will be our bachelor party. As we will have to spent more on our food now we canceled our bachelor parties and will have a family and friends cooking session.

Thank you again for helping me see how toxic my family is. I will try to sort it out. If they apologize from the bottom of their heart they will be allowed into my wedding but if not... Then well... I still have my brother (who will be walking me down to the aisle) and my aunt.

Part 4

We called my planner and she was actually really horrified. She told me she never had as much as talked to my mother since the day we went to book the venue. She assured me that even if they were to call and say that I wanted it, I had to be present to make any changes. So we informed everyone that will work for us on our wedding and they offered to hire security for that day at a reduced price

Hey everyone, I decided to post a last update, since I will be going full silent for a long period.

For those that didn't know, I'm right now dealing with my daughter's father and his delusion. He wants to use my daughter as a 'therapy doll' for his wife that recently lost a child.

A lot people were worried for my daughter and me, and I truly appreciate it. We're both safe, she's currently having a great vacation with her godparents, and I'm currently making my own arrangements to move on.

My lawyer is working hard on keeping everything in order. I know a cease and desist was his first action and we are going for no contact. He says we have a solid case and hopefully this will be resolve relatively fast. And by that I mean a year or two. We did get a temporary restraining order. It's only until our first court date, but after it could be extended.

I haven't had direct contact with 'Jeff'. He lawyered up too and tried to send a threat to take full custody. My lawyer laughed at it since his reasoning was 'parental alienation'. Except I have proof I tried for years to have him involved. Apparently turning in a few emails showing my attempts was enough to get them to change 'parental alienation' to a different reasoning. My lawyer is not worried in all honesty.

For now I've decided after much thinking that moving is going to be necessary. It won't be something I can do on a whim, but I'll be looking into new houses within the month to hopefully move some time this year.

School will remain the same, but we will be speaking to the admin to make sure only certain people can pick her up. And part of that decision has been to hire a private driver. He's someone I absolutely trust and has worked for relatives in the past, so I'm very comfortable with the idea and so is my daughter. Now I just have to make sure they don't go for fast food every day after school.

Things in all honesty are not that scary right now. I have a good lawyer, good evidence, and my little girl is happy and healthy, so I'm just going to focus on working things little by little. Because of the legal procedings I don't think I'll be posting any updates any time soon.

And to those sending me PMs telling me I'm horrible for keeping my daughter from her father, or telling me I shouldn't have had her in the first place, please kindly speak to the void. I'm too busy.

2/17/2024

Hey! Doing an unexpected update. My lawyer just called me to let me know Jeff was arrested. I'm not aware what the charges are. Short of being a murder, I'll be realistic, he's probably going to be out as soon as his parents post bail. That said, I have to admit, a petty side of me is rather happy since depending on the circumstances it might help in my bid to get a permanent no contact order.

My daughter is doing great by the way. She's been making her list of new school gear she wants for March (when she goes back to school). I've also been talking to my job about a chance to work in another country. We'll see.

Thank you everyone that has messaged me by PMs. You guys have great recommendations and I read them all. I couldn't keep up with all messages, but the vast amount helped a lot. If anything happens directly on my own case I'll post later on. For now I have a few months before we go into court again.

(I’m a woman not a man) My mom makes me go to bed at 10-11 and if I don’t she takes my laptop away. She already takes my phone away at night. She says it’s disrespectful if I’m up while she’s sleeping. And I she gets mad if I move in my sleep, I can’t even go to the bathroom cause I wake her up 🤦‍♂️ (my room is next to hers) I don’t understand cause I’m not loud and I just want to quietly do my work or watch my show. I don’t feel like an adult and never have. I’m planning to move out soon cause I can’t do anything. I tried talking to her telling her that I’m an adult now and I should be allowed to stay up if I want to and she says it’s her house so. The only option I guess is to move out. I just don’t know if this is a normal thing or if most people my age get to stay up and I’m just not in a normal household

I currently don’t speak to my mother, nor have I for many months now. But somehow she still finds ways to butt into my life and the decisions I make for my child.

My husband and I both come from anti-vaxx families. His side is against it but doesn’t shame us for vaccinating our daughter. My mother, however, really has a lot to say about it. Since we both were raised to not believe in science, it was pretty natural for us to be against vaccinating our daughter when she was born. I had a home birth so it was easy to avoid everything. We would lie to pediatricians about it and just did what our parents did when we were kids. But since the new vaccine for covid was released, I started to consider getting it and decided to do some actual research on vaccines as a whole. My husband and I made the decision to get vaccinated as well as getting a schedule started for our 6 month old baby to catch her up. We went in this morning to get her first shots. Everything went smoothly and so far she seems fine. She has been fussy and sleepier than usual but the pediatrician said that’s normal and will go away in a day or 2.

We left feeling proud that we were able to educate ourselves effectively and set our baby up for success.

Then I get a call. It’s my grandpa. Or so I thought.

I answer and the first thing I hear is “When you wake up and she isn’t breathing, you’ll be sorry!! I can’t believe you did this to MY little girl!”

I hang up immediately and start to panic. I eventually traced it back to a family member that is a doctor. I was asking her questions about vaccines and I told her we were going in today. I guess she told my grandpa how excited she was for us and then he told my mom and then BOOM, end of the world!

My MIL found out later and seemed supportive, given her opinions about vaccines. She told us “it’s your decision, and I trust that whatever you do is what is best for her”. So I’m glad we have her to help reassure us a bit. But now I’ve been getting texts and calls from my mom, through my grandpas phone, absolutely freaking out. Saying that she hopes something happens to her so I will see the consequences of my actions. Also that she is praying for her, whatever that means.

Ultimately, we are confident with our decision and will continue with her schedule. Although, at times we do question if we made the right decision. I’m sure everything will be fine. But my mother seriously needs to chill out!

I (24f) am graduating college this year. I dropped out at 18 for financial reasons and then went to community college. I graduated during the pandemic and transferred, taking 4 years at university since I worked and went as a part time student. I’ll be attending a credential program this fall and working in child development. I am having a small graduation party in June with my friends and family at my parents’ house.
My mom (51f) called me and said that a family friend Amy (24f) suggested that we have a joint party because her oldest kid Lila is graduating from kindergarten and said that Lila looks up to me and wants to share the party with me and we could save money.
I said absolutely not and that my graduation party would be boring for Lila and her friends, I would have to tell my friends not to swear or talk about anything adult, and nobody would want to hear about me or my degree because everyone would be focusing on the baby. My mom told Amy no.
Amy sent me a message saying that I broke Lila’s heart and I’m being ”self involved” and jealous of a 6 year old stealing the spotlight. Amy said that she deserves just as much recognition for raising kids and getting to this milestone as a parent and I said she sure does and she can do that at her own celebration, not at mine. Btw she had a baby shower and a wedding last year. She is not wanting for attention. She said “college isn’t a big deal, get over yourself“ and that I made a child cry because I wanted the attention to myself.

Backstory: i work at an alcoholic bar that essentially turns into a club at night

This man just came in with his toddler-ish kid, ordered a shitload of beers, and essentially let the TODDLER run around my bar to do whatever it wants. It made its way behind the bar (while i was attempting to piss on my break), and hit it’s head on something. Imagine my surprise, when i exit the bathroom and immediately get yelled at by this guy about how the child’s misadventurous accident was my fault. The exact quote is, “This place is not fit for a child, theres too much alcohol and wires behind the bar!” …. Maybe because I run a bar not a daycare?

essentially, i hate kids and incompetent, entitled parents.

edit: this is once again an opportunity to tell americans that cultures other than their own exist. southern european bars are often frequented by adults with their kids, and its considered normal here. however i do wish theyd look after their rats, and not blame me for their misconduct.

My parents started harassing me about voting. I told them I was going to. Then they keep bugging me about who I’m voting for. I shut them down and as we were leaving the restaurant my father yells “If you love us you will vote for Trump!” Of course everyone in the restaurant thought this was hilarious.