Q&As

I had to speed up the process of actually talking to her since the story spread quickly around on the internet, inevitably reaching someone involved with friends or family and now way more people i personally know are getting the details than I'm comfortable with

Oh well my bad lol

Before I ended up chatting with her, I opened up to my parents and sister about what was happening in detail. My parents were flustered at me hiding the more unsavory details to say the least and are probably going to be checking up on me daily for the rest of the year to make sure I'm ok. My sister would probably have to be held back from thrashing her, so I had to get a friend to help with the chat since my sister would not be able to contain herself

So basically, within hours of the story going into the digital stratosphere I called my wife back as quickly as I could to finally sit down and talk. We chose a local park this morning and I had a friend of mine record the conversation from beginning to end. I was bacially ready to hear the generic affair story and get out of dodge

But of course it got complicated.

We met at a section with picnic tables and picked one as far away from other people to avoid them getting wrapped up in any awkwardness. She looked terrible. Haggard, stressed, and thankfully without the baby. She tried to have the big emotional chat and what not. I wasn't tearing up or acting like the hardened badass. I frankly was just wanting to figure out what this was all for

I didn't even get to ask the question before the floodgates spilled. I'm going to attempt to relay this story as best as I can because even looking back on the recording it's a mess, but also, it's because I don't 100% believe it, so fair warning, it could all be fake

This all started with her mother. As I said before my wife's father was absent. He sarted off well, having 2 sons with her mother before herm l. When her mother got pregnant with her, her father went from being the picture perfect guy he was at first and slowly changed into a negligent, abusive, unfaithful, and unsupportive jackass, ending with him disappearing when her mother was delivering. He's been in and out of prison since. No one knows why he did it. The impression her mother always gave was a strong resilient woman who withstood anything life threw at her and did anything for her kids. She has claimed to be in therapy for years. In reality, she has managed to conceal a deep hatred for men outside of her sons, but according to my wife there was favoritism towards her. My wife also found out she stopped therapy almost a decade ago but never told anyone.

Her mother seemed to always have some slight against me and now i know why. She was never hostile, but certainly wasn't warm to me, and hearing about her secret hatred, I kinda knew where this was going. Roughly about half a year before she got pregnant, my MIL slowly began sowing seeds of doubt and bitterness into my wife. Apparently she had a full mental break. She told her about me staying late at work possibly hiding an affair. Or that myself providing majority on the income setting her up for a hard divorce. Everything my MILs husband did to her, she convinced my wife I would do to her, and she pumped this poison into her for months. My wife always idolized her mother, and compounding that with anxiety she's suffered from for years, she dove in deep.

As soon as she got pregnant, like on the dot, she fell into a mental hole within days. And that's when her mother got hold of her again. Hearing about her pregnancy apparently triggered something fierce in my MIL and it spiraled from there. She had my wife fully convinced it was happening again

Every single thing my wife did to hurt me was at the behest of my MIL. Combined with pregnancy hormones, an undiagnosed mental illness she claims to have (no confirmation), and stress, she completely lost her mind. She 100% believed I would bail, so she was punishing me first, culminating in her moving in with her mother and leaving me out of the birth

While I was sending the papers and started the divorce proceedings, she kicked into full blown post partum depression. And when her mother finally got her, when she finally beat me, which I guess was her victory over her ex (did I mention she's fucking crazy), she had no more use of my wife. The family involved in the birth included my MILs sister and my wife's brothers. While my MIL and her sister knew what was going on, my BILs got fed the bs narrative my MIL spun. When my MIL was done with her plan, the entire facade came down and my BILs found out everything upon questioning my wife. They were horrified.

Needless to say, postpartum, facing a very grueling divorce on her side, no longer welcome in our home, and having done everything to alienate me from my son at the behest of a broken lunatic, reality hit her like a truck. She torched her entire life because her mother is a broken shell of a human who used her to enact her own sense of justice. The very mother who washed her hands of her after she got what she wanted

Or at least this is the story she gave me

Frankly, there are many holes in her story. The starting point of the pattern of abuse, the claims of who was involved in the delivery, me being absent from appointments, the friend (who she confirmed is female) she's staying with, and of course, my alleged sons paternity.

It seems way too fucking crazy to be made up. Who the hell would go to the effort to make this up facing what she's facing?

As soon as she finished, she said she's setting up a paternity test and gave me the info I need. Within luck it should be done in roughly a week or so once i do my part. She gave the most sincere apologies any human being has ever given. She's begged for another chance. I was frankly, to stunned to say anything, so she left and promised to call soon

I don't think I can give her another chance. I don't think I can ever risk anything like this again.

God I'm still hoping she's just being a cheating psycho and spinning a sympathy story to try and throw me off, because this got way too complicated

Me and my husband have been together for over nine years and separating our finances never occurred to me until this past year.

I'm the saver and he's the spender. In the beginning it didn't bother me because we had two incomes and wasn't rich but lived comfortably.

His family has always "borrowed" money from us but rarely ever pay that money back. I personally don't lend money not even to family but I do not stop him from lending to his.

A few years ago my husband was in a bad car wreck and can no longer work so I became the sole breadwinner. He now gets disability but that was a four year process. In that time we dwindled our savings to nothing and came close to losing everything. Our debt mounted and there was nothing I could do.

When he received his back pay I only asked him to pay off his vehicle a loan in which I've paid over 50 grand on in the last few years and put some in savings.

He did neither. Instead he blew the money. Loaning over 10 grand to his family and paying nothing towards the debt we created.

During this time I was able to save some money from my paycheck but not much and had plans to pay some debts off once I have enough saved. He knew I was saving to do this.

About a month ago I noticed over 700 missing out our savings and I asked him what happened!?! He replied with I loaned it to my parents. I asked when he was going to receive it back because that money was already spent and I needed it. He said I don't know when they can afford to.

I blew up an lost my shit. He didn't ask me, we didn't speak about it. He did it behind my back because he knew it would piss me off and I would say no if he asked. We had a huge fight. I figured after that fight he would stop. But no...

Yesterday I checked my account and another thousand dollars was gone. Gone where u ask? He gave it his parents. I'm so mad I see red.

I flat out told him that as of today I'm done with his parents. I'll pay half the household bills buy our food and that's it. If he wants to lend all his disability to them fine but I'm not gonna go bust my ass 60 hours a week so he can keep giving our money away.

So AITA for going to the bank and withdrawing all the money I put there and opening a new account he don't have access to? He seems to think I am and says that I should want to make his parents happy. I would like to see them happy I just don't want to pay for that happiness.

One of my boyfriend's close colleagues had their baby shower today and he asked if I wanted to tag along. I got there, everything was pretty, and there were some good vibes. It was mostly the colleague's family and three of his other coworkers that were there, who ended up meeting (one male, two females).

When my boyfriend went to introduce me to one of the women, his male coworker jumped in saying, "That's his work wife!" And they all laughed. My boyfriend didn't really laugh genuinely but more coyly with his head down like he knew it wasn't right. I did not laugh at all and looked at both of them. The guy continued, "Yeah, everyone knows they're practically married. You should see their faces whenever one is missing out of work... they act so depressed. I asked if I could join them so I can get free food too!" (Not verbatim but that’s basically what he said)

I had no words. The "work wife" tried to make light of the situation by tapping my shoulder and joking, "Don't worry, he's in good hands!" And then she started telling my boyfriend that I was beautiful and he was lucky to have me. I didn't know what to say. I smiled politely and whispered to my boyfriend that I was leaving. He tried gripping my hip harder as an indirect way of saying no, but I pulled it off and called an Uber to go home because I was distraught.

He never mentioned having a "work wife" to me and I don't like the thought of it at all. I guess people were asking where I went and my boyfriend felt awkward because he had to make up a lie for me leaving early when they could already tell the real reason why I left so abruptly. He wanted me to wait and talk it out later. I knew I was only going to get angrier if I did.

AITA?

So when my parents were expecting me my mom decided to name me Catherine Elizabeth. My mom felt strongly about the name Catherine and Elizabeth was a family name on both sides so it was a kind of compromise name. Neither loved it but mom didn't like any of my dad's choices for middle name and my dad didn't like Catherine and with mom saying no to the middle name they decided to use a mutual family name. During my birth my mom suffered many complications. She was rushed for an emergency c-section and ended up needing multiple blood transfusions and was out of it for a couple of weeks. During that time dad decided he was going to name me what he wanted since my mom cut him out of choosing my first name. And I ended up with a name my dad loved but my mom hated it. She had no say in the name. By the time she was healthy enough, they were told they would need to pay to change it. Mom was bitter. My parents are still married but never recovered from it and I 100% get it. My mom was betrayed and is angry that he went against what she wanted while she was at her lowest point.

The thing in all of this is I love my first name. I got the middle name Elizabeth still. I don't care for that either way. But I love my first name. Even though my mom hates it. She always wanted me to be Catherine. And after I turned 18 a few weeks ago she asked me to let her pay now for me to change my name. She said she regrets not doing it when I was a baby. But she admitted my name makes her so angry and brings the betrayal up to the front of her memory. So she would love for me to wear the name she chose now... But I hate Catherine. I don't want to be Catherine.

This really upset my mom. She thinks my name is dumb. It's unique and not common in the US as a name. And I admit it's not for everyone but it is for me. I'm glad I ended up with my name over Catherine. But I know my mom is struggling with that realization. She really thought I would want to be Catherine when I turned 18 and would be glad to do it with her offer to pay. And she told me how disappointed she was and she asked me if I would consider it for her. I told her if I did it would make me unhappy. She got kinda mad at me and she implied she felt betrayed all over again.

AITA?

I’ve recently visited the US for the first time. I saw lots and lots of really big cars on the streets (like Ford Ranger, Chevrolet Silverado and so on), even in big cities! Their trunks were empty in 99% of cases, so it’s not like people are hauling cargo all the time. And there was only one person in the car most of the time.

I checked that the engines on those things are enormous, I can’t imagine how much the gas must cost.

What do Americans need such huge cars for, especially in the cities?

EDIT: well, that was enlightening! So from your responses I gather that the primary reasons are:

• small dicks

• arms race on the road, getting bigger vehicles to be safer

• freedom

• chickens

• cheap gas

• comfort while driving long distances

• some people actually need such large car for work or they have big families

• regulations which make a big car the best choice

• some people live in places where the conditions require this

EDIT2: with Ford Ranger I meant something like

My brother was married to Katrina for 8 years. He has a 10 year old daughter from a one night stand. Bio mom is not in the picture.

Katrina is the only mom my niece, Elise, has ever known. She became a stay at home mom when Elise was 2 and they’ve been inseparable since. She wanted to adopt Elise and Elise’s bio mom wanted the adoption to happen but her dad refused.

When Elise was around 4, my brother started using her to control Katrina. If they’d argue or she wouldn’t do what he wanted he’d either hurt Elise or leave with her for weeks/months at a time, telling her she was never going to see Katrina again. Katrina wasn’t able to do anything about it because she didn’t have any rights to Elise.

Katrina finally filed for divorce last year and my brother took Elise again. After a few months cps got involved and Elise was removed from his custody. Elise is temporarily staying with me while Katrina fights for custody.

She refuses to talk about what happens when her dad takes her but she’s terrified of men, including my husband, wakes up screaming, and she even had to spend some time in an inpatient facility. She’s doing intensive outpatient treatment now and is slowly improving. Katrina and I have been in contact and I’ve been letting her visit Elise. These visits are usually 4ish hours at a time, maybe 4 days a week. She makes food for Elise, they lay on the couch and watch her favorite movies, she gets Elise to do some schoolwork. She kind of goes back to being Elise’s mom during these visits.

Extended family has been asking why Elise is staying with me and not her dad. My brother said it’s because he travels a lot for work but I wasn’t going to lie to protect him so I told the truth, he’s an abusive piece of shit that hurt his daughter to control his wife. Then word spread that Katrina gets to visit as much as she and Elise can handle while he isn’t allowed to see his kid.

Now immediate family (parents, grandparents, brother) are mad at me for airing his dirty laundry, spreading rumors, and taking his ex’s side in all of this. AITA?

My (33F) MIL (67F) lives in another country with her husband. We never got along because she always insists on being the one to make the rules and is overall very controlling. She also disliked me from the start for merely existing. We don't see her very often thankfully but whenever we do it's always pretty stressful.

She is visiting now and staying with us. It's been a week. Normally my husband deals with her shit but he's currently travelling for work and won't be back until tonight. Since my husband left she's been HORRIBLE. It's like she's trying to get on my nerves on purpose. I try to keep calm because I know she'll leave in 2 weeks and I won't see her for months again. However, there's been an incident that me and my husband are now fighting about.

My toddler brought a large toy truck to the table. I reminded him 'no toys when we're eating, please put it back in the toy box and you can play with it when you're done eating'. My toddler was compliant but as he was getting off the chair MIL said 'it's ok honey, grandma allows it, your mommy is no fun, isn't she?'. This is not an isolated incident, she's been trying to undermine my parenting ever since my husband left for work (trying to let the kids eat sweets instead of dinner, telling them they can do things I just told them they were not allowed and so on).

I could not take it anymore and said 'let's not forget grandma is but a guest here. Guests don't make the rules, do they? I'm sure grandma knows who this apartment belongs to. And hotels are so expensive in this area'. I admit my tone was mocking and I was referring to the fact that I alone own our home (I inherited it from grandpa). She was red and called me disrespectful but did not escalate it any further.

The same evening my husband is calling me furious, asking how dare I tell his mother she's not welcome here. I told him full story and he was still pissed, claiming I should have handled it better and keep peace. He said he can't even leave for a few days without us getting in a fight in front of the kids. I told him why don't you say that to your mother. I also told him this is the last time I'm allowing her to stay over. She can live in a hotel or not come at all for all I care if she has to act like this. I refuse to feel so uncomfortable in my own home.

I also told him I'm going to my parents' lake house this weekend because the weather is so nice and I want to relax. However, MIL is not welcome to join. He has 3 options: go with us, try to convince the kids to stay home with him and MIL so that I could go alone or I go with the kids and he stays with MIL. He told me it's very rude not to invite MIL. She would love to go to the lake. I said maybe but she's the one I need a break from. He called me a petty asshole. I sure am petty but I don't think I'm the asshole here. Never in my life have I started an argument with MIL first. But just in case, AITA?

I've (32 M) been married to my wife Jen (32 f) for a little over 7 years now. Up until about two years ago, things were great. However, a disastrous move, a few family emergencies, and a totaled car have left us in a terrible financial situation. All our savings are pretty much gone, 401k's empty, and we're hemorrhaging money.

Before we bought our house 2 years ago, things were amazing financially. We made the mistake of buying a nice 3-bedroom house because we planned on having kids. Those plans, thankfully, got put on the back burner because adding a kid into this mess right now would kill us. It's not really a mystery why things are like this. Jen and I are both underpaid at our jobs, and we moved into a high-cost-of-living area like morons.

Last December, I told Jen one of two things needed to happen: We either sell the house or start making more money. The latter would most definitely mean finding new jobs that would pay us a market rate. Jen pushed back on this because she loved the house and her current job. I told her she had to choose one and couldn't have it both ways and after a week of arguing, she agreed we would look for new jobs.

It's been almost six months now. Last Friday, I signed an offer for a new job. It's over a 35k raise for me. Jen, however, has done nothing. In January, she asked for a raise in the market rate and was very disrespectfully told by her manager that she was not worth that. She was shown the door to leave if she wasn't happy. Jen has taken this as her putting in the effort and done nothing else. Telling me we should wait and see what happens with my job search.

I'm not happy about this, when I came home Friday and told her I got the job, she got pissy because I clarified this does not mean she can stay at her job. We fought again, and I told her that this would mean we only stop hemorrhaging money on the house. We will be able to save only a little and would still not be close to refilling our 401k's. Kids, the whole reason we got this damn house would be entirely off the table.

We haven't talked much since then. yesterday, her parents visited for dinner. Despite my best efforts to keep them out of it, Jen announced my new job to her parents by saying maybe I'll stop "complaining about money" once I start. I don't know why I said it, but I replied with, "Oh, don't worry, Jen. I won't have to worry about money a year from now because we'll be divorced by then." Things got quiet real quick after, and I excused myself. Her parents left shortly after, and she slept on the couch to avoid talking to me.

I've not talked to Jen or her parents since last night. Things are very cold between us right now, and I genuinely wonder if I did something last night that probably ruined my marriage.

Update:

Yeah, I messed up. People are rightfully tearing into me for wondering if this marriage didn't end when those words came from my mouth. I went to Jen last night to talk, and she refused to even say a word to me. She ended up locking herself in our bedroom and finally told me to go away. I'm scheduling some consultations with divorce attorneys today.

Some people are asking about car accidents and family emergencies, mostly blaming me for them. The car was neither of our faults. An uninsured driver hit my wife's fully paid-off car. Insurance gave us peanuts. The family emergencies were a handful of things that were just unluckily close to each other. I don't think you can really assign blame to these kinds of things. People will probably say I'm covering my ass or something and still blame me. Whatever. The big fuck up was the house, which I was 50% responsible for.

Before I wrote this post, I probably should have admitted to myself that I spoke my feelings at dinner and got my wish.

I have been dating my boyfriend Logan (25M) for almost a year now and our sex life up until recently used to be great. He's slowly started watching more and more porn to the point where he can't even finish during sex without watching something. Our main position now is him on top with his phone right beside my head so he can watch it to help him finish, at first i didn't have a problem with this but as it's gotten worse i had to tell him it needs to stop.

Keep in mind we've experimented with lots of things to spice things up and I always ask for feedback on what he likes to make him feel better. He tells me everything I do is great he just needs visual stimulus.

I miss that intimacy we used to have during sex and really feeling that connection, now all he does is stare at his screen like a crack addict trying to cum while fucking me. It feels so fake. I told him this needs to stop and I let it go on far too long but he's telling me to stop overthinking and that it's no big deal...

For the past month, my husband (27 M) and I (28 F) have been in a rut. We’ve been arguing about so many trivial things. Last week, he randomly asked me if I liked eating s’mores. I said I don’t care for them and rarely do I ever crave them. He then asked me what I thought of cabins and camping. I told him I don’t care for either to be honest and the only way I would go camping is if it was a glamping experience. He nodded and said noted.

Today he tells me to be ready and dressed by 4 pm because we have a date planned. I put on a cute outfit because all he told me was we have a special date planned. Any other time he’s said that, the date usually involves us going out to a fancy restaurant. So I put on a skirt, some heels, and a top. He sees my outfit, doesn’t say anything. The only thing I noticed that was odd was that he brought his backpack with him. I asked him why, and he said that he just wanted to put his hoodie somewhere in case it got cold later.

We get into the car and 20 minutes into the drive I ask him how far is the restaurant we’re going to. He smiles and says, “about an hour”. I pull up my phone and start responding to some work emails to kill time. And then when we arrived to our destination I honestly got so upset. It was a super tiny trailer in the middle of the West Virginia woods. There was a small picnic table outside and just woods. I ask him what we were doing there and he turns to me and says, “surprise! we’re having a couple’s retreat. Do you like it?” I walk inside the trailer and mind you, my husband knows I am extremely claustrophobic. There is no room inside this trailer. I start panicking because a. I need physical space b. I’m in HEELS AND A SKIRT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE WOODS c. HE PACKED PJS, his toothbrush, AND A CHANGE OF CLOTHES BUT DIDNT THINK TO TELL ME ID BE NEEDING ANYTHING FOR THIS DATE.

At that point I just blatantly ask him, “have I ever expressed any interest in camping to you?” He said, “no.” And then I followed up with, “you know how much I hate small spaces, what made you think I’d enjoy this, I just really want to understand?” He didn’t say anything. I told him I appreciated the gesture but I could not for the life of me figure out how he thought planning this in the way he did was going to help get us out of a rut.

This isn’t the first time he’s planned something for me that I hated. And the worst thing, I’ve told him before if I’ve never expressed interest in something to please not gift it to me or plan a date around it. I do a very good job at giving him extremely thoughtful gifts and planning him very thoughtful dates/experiences. And today I told him that it just seems like there isn’t any consideration for me in that regard. Am I the asshole for reacting the way that I did?

A little about me: I am 30, and my wife is 29. Before we got married (we knew each other for three years), we decided I would be the sole earner, responsible for finances and taxes, while she would be a housewife, taking care of the kids and household duties. We agreed she would never work, and I wouldn't ask her to either.

In the first two years of our marriage, we didn't have kids. I worked from 8 am-6 pm. Sometimes she'd wake up and make me breakfast, sometimes she wouldn't. I didn't mind because we were early in our marriage. On days she made breakfast, she would also pack me lunch. On days she didn’t wake up early, I would eat both breakfast and lunch at work. She would wake up around 12-2 pm, do household chores, and wait for me to come home. We would have dinner together and spend time going out for movies, dinners, or visiting friends, at least twice a week.

This year, we had a baby. I took one month of leave to help her, which is the maximum my job allows. State leave was an option, because the subsidized pay wouldn't cover our bills. After my leave, her parents stayed with us for two months, helping with the baby. I supported all the household bills during this time. After they left, our baby was three months old, and this is when issues began. My wife was used to her previous routine of waking up late and now found it difficult to manage caring for the baby and household chores.

I offered to help by cleaning the first floor of our house and putting our baby to bed several times a week, despite working from 8 am to 6 pm, handling all immigration paperwork, taxes, bills, and grocery shopping (since she doesn’t drive). However, every day I come home, she seems angry or upset, often taking it out on me. Sometimes it's about the baby, sometimes it's about me not helping enough around the house.

Today, we had an argument where I asked why she was consistently struggling with her responsibilities. I acknowledged that she had an easier life in the first two years of our marriage because she didn’t work, but reminded her that we had planned for this baby and understood it would require more work. We had agreed she would be the primary caretaker and housewife, but now, she would not stop complaining and we can't stop having fights.

Am I the asshole for asking her to fulfill her share of the household responsibilities?

Using a theowaway for obvious reasons. Just a quick background info: My wife (Heather - 36F) and I (35F) have been together for the past 14 years, and married for 10. We have two daughters ( 4 and 6 years old) together.

Heather is a doctor and she works ridiculously long hours, gets tired, etc. Yesterday she came back home after being away all day (she was on call and needed to go in for an emergency surgery), and told me she was going to sleep for a couple of hours and asked me to wake her up by dinner so she could see the girls and I a bit.

She slept around 5 PM. I tried to wake her at 7 PM. I called for her, softly shook her, gave her a kiss on the cheek but she didn't get up. (She is a very light sleeper ans these things wake her up 90% of the time). I thought she needed the rest and let her sleep. Heather slept until the next morning which is when she needed to go to work.

Heather was very upset the following morning saying I should have woken her up, and that I had caused her to miss an entire day of family time. I explained that she didn't get up and she said I just should have tried harder to wake her.

I get that she wants to be present in our family (and she is) and she wants out kids to see both their moms but I just wanted to let her get some much needed sleep to help her be well rested for the next day. Was I genuinely the AH?

I went to a friend’s housewarming party. They live pretty far, approx 1 hour drive. Not only we went all the way there, they also didn’t provide any food. They then decided to order pizzas and then asked for the money back. Is this considered normal? I am Italian, sounds shocking to me that you’d expect people to travel this far to come and see you at your party and then also expect people to pay to eat. Is it a cultural shock or is it stingy of them?

I 31M refused to give my stepsisters any of my inheritance.

MY father began dating a woman when I was 8 years old. He and my mother had already split. The woman he began dating had three other children from another relationship. And me and my SM never got along. I never got along with her or her children and this relationship only seemed to get worse when I moved in with my father when I was 12 years old.

So for context my father is a very emotionless man. He made it very clear to my step mother that she would not parent me, and he would not parent her children. Each will deal with there own children, a rule which he abided by, she did not. To be clear although he was not emotionally there for her children he did but them everything they wanted. They went to private schools, they always had the latest tech and money, when they came of age he bought each of them a car. Spending money was my fathers way of being emotional this was exactly how he was with me.

All the way through my teens she would increasingly try to control my life, what I could do, where I could go, what money I was allowed, what I could eat.

If I mentioned it to my father he would talk to her and it would stop for a couple of months and then begin again. The cycle continued all throughout my childhood. Tbh nothing she did really bothered me after years of being around them they all just became irrelevant to me as harsh as it sounds. I had no negative or positive feelings towards any of them.

Fast forward to when I was 15 and this is when the relationship between myself and her(and her children) really took a turn for the worse.

My father got diagnosed with cancer. As soon as he was diagnosed he wrote a will and left me everything. The house, the cars, his money, his savings, his other properties, his business literally everything. The will was left with his solicitor, and a copy was given to him he placed this with all his other documents in a secure place so people would know if anything happened to him what his wishes were.

My father was given the all clear after a year of getting treatments and surgeries. It seemed as soon as he was given the all clear my SM found his will and exploded. She came into my room with her oldest daughter who didn't even live with us at that time screaming at me telling me I had manipulated my father and to get out of her house right now before she calls the police. I was 16 how had I manipulated him?

I left, as I said previously nothing these people could say to me would ever bother me. They were irrelevant to me. I rang my father and informed him what had happened(also said preciously) my father is emotionless I have never heard him change his tone of voice let alone get angry. He turned up to the house within twenty minutes of getting my phone call and as soon as he was back he told my step sisters to leave so he and my SM could talk.

My Step sisters came outside and all 4 of us were there and I believe for the first time In my life I heard my father raise his voice. I couldn't make out what he was saying but after 5 minutes he came out of the house told me to get into his car we were going to get food.

In the car he went back to his normal self, my dad's never tried hiding anything from me so I asked what he said to my SM. He had told her everything thing he owns goes to me that will never change. The next few years I don't think my SM or stepsisters spoke to me, maybe meaniel things like hello, good bye but definitely not a conversation not until I was 18.

When I was 18 my dad and my SM gathered me and her children and informed us all that they were buying a new family home. My SM oldest daughter said "ow that's nice. You'll get a good price for this one and before my SM replied my father interrupted and informed us all he wasn't selling he was given the house to me. This was his house he had bought before he even met my SM

Everyone of them turned and in unison began screaming at me how I take all my fathers money and things along those lines. ( I didn't even know my father was giving me the house. I didn't even know he was buying a new one) my oldest stepsister began hysterically screaming for me to give her the house. She had a husband and a child she needed it and i was going to uni so I didn't.

My father then piped up with his calm unchanging voice that the new house being bought would be split equally between himself and my SM so when they pass I would get his 50% and they would share there mothers 50%. This did not help the situation and instead I began getting screamed at more. I was indifferent to them so I didn't really phase me and we moved on.

12 years later I am now 30 years old my SM and my father have been broken up for about 3 years. Still living together just completely separate I haven't spoken to my stepsisters in 10 years even though I see atleast one of them every other week.

My SM got diagnosed with terminal cancer she only had 12-18 months to live. She moved in with her eldest daughter due to needing round the clock care and my father couldn't provide it for her.

So four months pass and none of them have contacted my father, not once. He had a stroke and ended up going into a coma, after being in the coma for two weeks I reached out and let my SM know. I didn't delay on purpose they just never crossed my mind. The day after I informed her I went around to his house to collect all of his documents( in preparation for his death I wanted everything ready rather than have to search for it) and his locks had been changed. This didn't bother me I just went home and forgot about it.

3 weeks later my father came out of his coma and was due to be sent home. He was severely unwell but he was alive. So went round to SM got the new keys and took him home.

After a week of being home he recieved a letter from his pension informing him of a beneficiary change so he rang and his pension had been changed into my SM name. Now my father had 3 private pensions and everyone of them had been changed. His signature had been forged on documents. We then went through every important thing that was of value. Pension, cars, bank accounts. Everything.

She had changed all of my fathers car logbooks into hername and his pensions. in total around 850k worth of assets and money she would have stolen if he had passed away when he was in his coma. However the one good thing from this was when we rang the mortgage company for the property they had bought together they had informed us that the property was in fact bought on a joint mortgage, which means both of them own 100% of the property ( if one dies the survivor gets 100% of the propery) this wasn't an issue for my father he said she could have 100% if he dies before it sells.

Once confronted with the attempted theft she just said I thought you would of wanted me to have it.

After this the relationship between them soured. They both wanted to sell the house. However she wanted 100% of it. They agreed he would get 30 she would get the 70 he was happy to give it her.

So we were going through some more of his documents and found his life insuarance documents. I knew my father was wealthy but I never imagined how wealthy until I seen how much the life insuarance policy was for and I was down as 100% beneficiary.

Whilst reading through the life insuarance documents I notice a small section on a cohabiting policy. So my father rang them and they informed us yes even though I was down as beneficiary she would still be entitled to claim 50% because they are legally in a cohabitation partnership. Doesn't matter they are no longer together the have a joint mortgage which is all the proof she would need.

So after my father had taken a turn for the worse and speaking to a solicitor me and my him devised a plan.

We asked the solicitor to send a letter to them informing my father would not sell the property unless it was a 70/30 split to him. Tbh he probably is entitled to that because she never paid a penny for anything. he didnt care about the house just the life insuarance.

Now one of my stepsisters is a solicitor and we were hoping that her first reaction would be to ensure her mother got at least 50% not 30.5 and we were correct a week after our solicitor sent the letter we recieved a notice of severence from my step sister informing my father that on the grounds him and my SM had split they are both entitled to 50% of the house. This is what we needed to legally show she is no longer cohabiting.

My father passed three weeks after we received this. His funeral, my SM and stepsisters turned up, and they were joyous, happy,laughing. This didn't really bother me. I knew how petty they were and expected it.

Anyway, 6 months after my fathers funeral, my wife and child were out with friends at a play area for the kids, and my eldest stepsister was there with her husband and children. I could see them staring and giggling, and eventually, they came over. They mentioned the house and how we tried and failed to rob 20% of it from them and some other things. Then she started to say disrespectful things about my father, and I snapped.

I told them, " we didn't care about the house. My dad didn't want my Sm to get his life insuarance. "

My stepsisters went quiet for around 30 seconds and then started asking what I meant. I just grabbed my child and me and my wife and I left.

The next day, I was bombarded with phonecalls asking what my father had left me, and I told them, every single thing I got in inheritance, I told them right down to the last penny. And then proceeded to brag about how we needed them to fill for the severence because if we did, they would block and delay it, suspecting something

I was then non stopped harassed for the next couple of weeks, telling me I didn't deserve the money. I should split it 4 ways because he was all of our father, not just mine. Then the threats started, and I received a letter from my SM youngest daughter, who was a solicitor, informing me of legal proceedings they are going to take.

So now, after 4 months of this, we were informed today that they have no legal claim to any of my fathers inheritance. Due to all his paperwork, will, beneficiaries on his polices which he was in sound mind when he completed. It has ruled in my favour.

I recieved another phone call from my eldest stepsister after I found out about winning the case. Begging me to split the money and assets or atleast give them the money from the house that my father and their mother owned together.

My wife believes I should just give them something to leave us alone, but that would go against what my father wanted. Me and my wife both earn good money so we wouldn't miss it and the only one of my stepsisters who earns decent money is the solicitor the other two are desperate for money.

But when I think about it I'm constantly reminded that I don't actually care for these people so why should I help them out.

So, AITAH?

Edit -- just to make it clear, my SM passed away around 3 months ago. The house was sold for 1.2m so they did recieve inheritance, around 200k each. Assuming she left equal amounts to each of her children

My wife and I have been married just shy of four years and she's almost 8 months pregnant with our first child. Originally we were team green (not finding out the sex) so wanted to have a boy and a girl name. But my wife got so frustrated that I wasn't happy to just let her use her top choices for names (Peter for a boy and Susan for a girl) and for suggesting the name Everly after my late sister's middle name, that she looked at the sex and found out we were having a boy so we would only focus on boy names. She then decided she would give me a list of her top 10 boy names and I could choose one from that since I wanted to be involved.

I admit this pissed me off. When we were dating she complained all the time that her sister's husband never cared about the names of their children and gave no input at all and how lazy and lacking he was as a father. I promised her back then that I'd always want to play a role in that stuff and look for names together. She said that was perfect. I also mentioned how I'd love to use Everly for a future daughter in some way to honor my sister and she thought it was such a sweet idea. She said she was glad I was that way because she could never marry a guy like her sister's husband or have kids with someone like that.

But now that we're actually in the baby naming stages, she has changed her mind and wants to have full say because she's the one carrying our child. She was so pissed off that she said my involvement could be picking from the names she loves most and nothing else.

Her list was Peter, Lawrence, Francis, Samson, Vincent, Patrick, Chester, Geoffrey, Stanley and Caleb. I chose Caleb but she didn't like that and still wanted Peter. We had not agreed on a name. I told her I did not want Peter.

But then when we went to her parents house for a family dinner the other week she told her family we had decided to name our son Peter. I was furious because we had not agreed to that. Her family were all so happy and when we got a moment alone I accused her of being manipulative and trying to force my hand by making me the bad guy if I keep refusing. I told her she clearly never meant what she said about wanting a man who'd be involved and she should have found herself a replica of her sister's husband because that's what she really wants. She told me too loudly that I was being a jerk and "couldn't change my mind now" so her whole family were pissed off at me for trying to change Peter. Her sister's husband mocked me for being such a weak man. He said this because of how angry everyone else was at me and because I already took my wife's name in marriage and was now "letting her" name our kid. Which made me more angry at her and made her more angry at me for being angry. Then she told me I had no right to call her manipulative and we've been tense since then.

AITA?