My ex-brother in law wants to be the “representative” of his estate.
The house has significantly appreciated in value, and was awarded to my deceased ex in the divorce which occurred in October 2023. As part of the decree, he had 180 days to get my name off of the mortgage, or the house had to be sold. He met to refinance the house on April 22nd and died the following day. The mortgage company backed out and my name is still on the mortgage. He had no will, so everything will go to next of kin, our 18 year old daughter. We (myself and my daughters) did not have a good relationship with his family. There needs to a “representative of his estate” to oversee the sale of the house and the settling of debts. This will be too much for our daughter. She is a very anxious person. My ex brother in law has volunteered to do this: help sell the house and set up a trust fund for both girls (aged 18 and 15). He has a lawyer - who helped my deceased ex through the refinance process - who is preparing paper work for my older daughter to name ex brother in law as “representative”.
Here’s my issue/question. As the “representative”, is there any way at all that my ex BIL can divert those funds to himself? I have some trust issues with my ex’s family. My ex had a significant brain injury and I received no help and support from them during our 20 year marriage, and now all of a sudden they want to be involved. People are telling me that I need to get my own lawyer. I can’t decide if that’s overkill or not, being as the lawyer that my ex BIL is working with helped my ex husband with the refinancing, and seems to be representing his estate. Is there anything I should be wary of? Am I being overly paranoid? This is my first time posting on Reddit about anything serious lol. Thanks in advance for any advice.