Q&As

TL;DR: Bitter truth was revealed bit by bit. Ex-fiancee had sexual interaction with a stripper. It's therapy time.

I read most of the comments in the original post and thank you for the advice. My problem was that not her being blindsided by her friends but lying. Every bridesmaid told different things and none of them gave details about what happened. I believe you can understand it just shatters the trust and makes you think there is something going on.

I thought there was something wrong with me after reading the comments. There were a lot of YTAs and I thought I should apologize. One of the bridesmaid reached out to me last evening. I suspect she saw the post somewhere and recognized it. I knew my fiancee was having problems with her friends since last week but I did not know the extent. Apparently, my ex-fiancee and her close friends blamed the girl that I encountered at mall about everything. This divided the group and led into a verbal fight. I will skip the personal details here but in the end she told me my ex-fiancee and other bridesmaids got sexual with the strippers. My fiancee was the only one who had boyfriend/fiancee/spouse(at least monogamously) there to my knowledge. Also, I was told by her that my ex-fiancee was not blindsided with stripper invites. She was happy to see the strippers and was relieved she had an excuse. I do not have proof for all of these but I got a short video of girls making out with strippers. One of the girls is my ex-fiancee and that's enough.

She has been trying to reach out to me since we broke up. I confronted her again. At first, she denied it again then it became we just touched, then okay we kissed too, okay I gave him a handjob, finally I was coerced into doing these by others as I pressed on. I just blocked her after the last part. I did not see any need to learn further. I was hurt already but learning that I got cheated on hurt more. I am not sure if it's the full truth even now. I will never know but all I can say is it hurts. I will go to a therapist to not carry my luggage to my next relationship. I lost 15K from the wedding related things and need to focus on filling the hole for a while.

Some misogynists made weird comments about women and I'll just ignore them. Some of the people told me I am an insecure, unfunny nerd for playing WoW on my bachelor party. Isn't the whole point of bachelor parties having "one last fun". It was raiding non-stop with the boys for me, not having one last sexual interaction with a stranger or having a stranger's butt on my face or penis. I will not miss on out these during marriage anyways(omitting the stranger part).

That's it. It's therapy time tomorrow and thank you for the help.

I'm (16m) a glass child. My sister (15f) was born with chronic health problems and a physical disability. Her life hasn't been easy and she's pretty often in pain and limited in what she can and can't do. It meant our parents were always making special time for her and doing what they could to let her enjoy being a kid. It also meant my parents weren't really my parents. They would take her places and leave me behind at home or with someone else in the family. I never got that same time with them. They even missed two of my birthdays completely because they had focused so much on bringing my sister to concerts she wanted to go to that they forgot my birthday and didn't even get me something small like a $5 gift card which they did a few times when their money was more focused on my sister.

I spent most of my time with my paternal grandparents when I was younger. But grandma died 3 years ago and grandpa lives in a nursing home in another city so I don't have them anymore and that made it more difficult.

Covid was also super lonely because I felt lonely and like my parents and sister were a family and I was the intruding roommate. My sister actually had a temper tantrum in April of 2020 and broke some of my gaming stuff and not only was it never acknowledged at all but it wasn't replaced either. They only focused on the fact my sister was so upset that she did it.

A few months ago I decided I needed to talk to my parents to see if it could get better. They decided we needed therapy together. In therapy it was recommended we spend more time together like they do with my sister. So we did that once a week. They still spent the rest of the week focused on my sister. It only just started when my sister got so jealous and had a meltdown over them focusing on me and she accused our parents of preferring me to her. My parents asked me then if I could be understanding and give more time before we focus on us because my sister really needed them and couldn't deal with sharing them at that point. I was so mad and hurt but I also felt so done. So I told my parents not to bother because their only child clearly needs them and I'll be out of their hair as soon as I can be. They went back to my sister being their only focus and I stopped caring. This made them suggest all four of us to go to therapy, but with someone new since the old place we went to would not be happy with them ignoring the advice. They told me it's all that will work now. I said no. They told me this is how we work on things all together and fix things. I told them it was too late. That I didn't have them being my parents for 15 years and I'm expected to be okay with that until my sister feels okay about sharing. I told them they made the choice of whose feelings mattered more and just like always they put her first so I was done and I didn't want to fix it.

They have begged me a few times since and they told me they're willing to work on it so I need to be reasonable.

AITA?

This is about my middle daughter, Kara. I informed her a few months ago that I will stop giving her an allowance when she turned 16. I did this because she is old enough to earn her own pocket money by getting a job or babysitting for anyone in the family. It is also good job experience for her to work and really understand getting a paycheck. Not to mention learning how to interact with coworkers.

Multiple family have younger children and are always asking for any relatives who can babysit. So there is something quite easy for her to do if she doesn't want to get a part time job

I did the same thing with my older son and he got his own job at the local pool. There are plenty of jobs around the area so that is not an issue. I made it clear I will help both of them to get a job, and when my son asked I helped him with his resume.

So her 16 birthday went and gone. She asked me where her allowance was and I reminded her that she isn’t getting one anymore.

This started an argument and she thinks I am jerk for doing this. My husband also thinks I should give in but I am not

Edit: I am getting off, if you have a question I have many comments and it is probably in there.

I ( F,28) have been in a relationship with my fiancé , Tyler ( M, 42) for the last 4 years. He has 2 kids from previous marriage ( Kids are 8.5 year old boy and 11 year old girl ) . His wife passed way when his youngest was 1 year old . He met me 3 years later . His kids are wonderful and lovely and we get along great . We live together . I do everything for them since Tyler works long hours . They call me mom but they are aware who their real mom is . We have her pictures in their rooms , and Tyler talks about her to them all the time . We are planning our wedding . My father offered his condo in Hawaii to us so we can enjoy our honeymoon there . It was a very kind and generous offer . When I told Tyler he was so grateful . Then he said “I bet kids will have a blast” . I looked at him in disbelief and said “kids?! “ He said yes! I said that’s our honeymoon! I don’t wanna be a mom on my honeymoon. We can go on plenty of family trips later but this is our honeymoon! He said “I was honest with you from day one ! I told you I’m a package deal ! You can’t just choose me not my kids”. I told him I understand but can they stay with your mom for one week ? Just for our honeymoon. He got very frustrated and said he couldn’t believe how insensitive and selfish I was being . AITAH to expect to have a child free honeymoon?

I'm (16m) being raised by my maternal grandparents. After my mom died my died dad decided he needed to get away and left me with them. We had all lived with my grandparents before that so it wasn't a huge change but I missed my dad. I was only 5 when it all went down. Three years later he came back and he was engaged and he wanted me to be a family with him and "Sandy". He and my grandparents fought in court over me because my grandparents were my legal guardians. Reunification therapy was ordered for the two of us and the courts let him see me for one weekend a month at the start. The reunification therapy didn't go the way it was meant to (with me wanting to live with him and feeling comfortable living with him again) and so it was decided my grandparents would keep custody of me and he would get every other weekend visitation. He was also allowed one week of vacation every summer until I turned 16 (so this will be the first summer it's not a legal obligation).

My dad and Sandy have kids together and my dad has tried to get me to want them. Not just Sandy or his other kids but him. He knows I don't want to be part of his family. He knows I see going to his house as a chore. And I know he tries but I'm not interested. I never hid that from him either. But my dad and Sandy took it for granted that I'd be going on vacation with them this year and it's not happening. Once I told them it was like this huge deal and my dad and Sandy freaked because they told their kids I'd be going and the last weekend I was there the kids were telling me they wanted us to go on this water slide together. Sandy told me I could go for the sake of the kids and I asked her why I'd do that. So then she was like, you should be the one to tell them since it'll make them sad. I told her they were the ones who assumed and didn't ask so I wasn't going to do their parenting for them. Dad asked me to reconsider. He told me he feels like he's losing me and these next two years will be big for our relationship in the future. I told him he lost me 11 years ago.

Sandy and dad are now both pissed off at me for not telling the kids myself. They told me I should grow up and take accountability and protect my innocent siblings.

AITA?

I know the tittle is a bit weird, but this was the best way I found to translate what was said. Obligatory apologies for bad grammar and/or spelling. English is not my first language.

I'm M44, my husband is M40 (been married for 20 years, together for 22) and our adoptive son is M24. He's black and we're not. I'm only mentioning this because it's relevant to the story later. This does not take place in the US.

Let me give a little bit of background to the situation. About 19 years ago, me and my husband had been driving on a highway, back from a small vacation, when along a particularly long stretch of road (absolutely no buildings around, only a ton of grass and hills as far as the eye could see), we spotted a little boy just sitting by the side of the road.

Like I mentioned, there was nothing around for miles, and no cars close to where the boy was, so we decided to stop and see if everything was ok. When we got closer to the boy, let's call him Jason (fake name), it was very easy to see he was dirty and malnourished since the only thing he had on were some diapers. He was so small it didn't look like he could be older than 3 (later found out he was actually 5).

We asked him why he was alone, and he told us that "Mommy and daddy put him here and told him to wait." There was no cell signal in the area, so we did the sensible thing and brought him back to town to the nearest police station.

To make a long story short, CPS was called, we discovered his parents were some druggies that were on the run from a felony. The only other relative Jason had was his grandmother, who was very mentally ill and couldn't take care of him, and we felt bad. He went into foster care soon after, but we felt bad for the kid and kept in touch with his case worker.

I had (still do) an extremely well paying job at the time, and could easily afford a decent lifestyle for a small family, so after a few months of discussions between ourselves, the case worker, and some bureaucracy, we formally adopted Jason.

Now onto the situation. About 3 years ago, Jason's parents were released from prison on parole. They contacted him not long after in hopes of reconnecting. Prior to that they'd sent him a few odd letter here or there, but nothing really substantial.

At first he was hesitant to talk to them, but ended up caving and meeting them for lunch one day. I'll admit that a part of me was a bit jealous and apprehensive of what could happen. But I could see that it really was something that my son wanted to do, so for his sake I swallowed those and supported him through it.

It wasn't very long, about 3 months I think, that he started to pull away from us. At first I chalked it up to him being excited to actually talk to his bio-parents after so long. Talk about what had been going on in his life, spend some time with them, etc... It started to bother me when he'd cancel plans with us last minute because "mom had an emergency" or "dad really needs me to help him with something today" or whatever other excuse he could come up with. He used to come over to our house at least once a week, call every day or so, but now we were lucky if he even came by that month. Again, I thought that was just temporary, that he was just excited and soon enough he'd start spending some time with us again.

We were overjoyed when he invited us over to diner one night. It was supposed to be a family gathering, us and his bio-parents and his wife (girlfriend at the time). I wasn't exactly keen on meeting the people that had left my son for the dead on the side of the road, but decided to give them the benefit of the doubt, thinking maybe they'd atoned and changed. Besides, he's our son and we love him. We had to at least try.

To say the diner was a disaster is an understatement. His bio-mom was extremely rude to my and my husband the entire night, making passive aggressive homophobic and racist remarks every chance she got. His father was much the same. It all came to head when she straight up called us the f-word and threw a glass at my husband. A screaming match followed and we left soon after.

The next day Jason apologized profusely the next day and promised they'd never do something like that again. I told him neither me and my husband wanted to have anything to do with them, and would appreciate if he understood that. He seemed to, but continued to pull away the next few months.

And that leads to what happened last week. Jason proposed to his girlfriend about 9 months back, and has been preparing for the wedding since. Of course we were overjoyed for him. But a few months went by and no invitation came. Every time we asked Jason would say they hadn't been sent out yet and changed the subject. Well, last week my husband saw a twitter post from one of Jason's friends, his groomsman, that went a few weeks back, with the invitation in hands. We confronted Jason about it the next time he came over, only for him to drop the bomb on us that we hadn't been invited.

We asked why, and he said "his parents" didn't want us there and wouldn't come if we did. I was fucking furious. I asked him how could he choose those pieces of trash over us? Why they were so important? What did we do to deserve this kind of treatment?

His answer? "They understand me better. They're my people."

At this point my husband was crying, asking how could he do this? I've only ever been truly angry a few times in life, and this moment managed to top all of them. I threw him out right then and there and told him to never come back. That he wasn't our son anymore. I spent the rest of the day hugging my husband and trying to calm him down.

The next day I canceled everything we'd paid for the wedding, which was basically everything important, even the ones we couldn't get a refund on. Of course Jason had the gall to call and scream at me, asking how I could do that to him, where would he find replacements for a wedding that was supposed to happen only a few months from now? I told him I didn't give a shit and said "Maybe you should ask those two leeches you call parents for some help."

19 years. 19 FUCKING YEARS of my goddamn life spent raising and loving a kid that I considered my own son, only to be treated like garbage. Giving blood, sweat and tears, so he would have a good life, all the love we could possibly give, and that's what we get as a reward.

As for why I'm asking if I'm the AH, some people have been calling and messaging us (mostly Jason's friends and a few of our family members) calling us heartless and monsters for doing what we did to him. And that's honestly got me questioning if I went a bit too far in anger. After all, parents are supposed to love unconditionally, right? But if so, how do we ever get over something like this? How can we deal with this feeling of betrayal? Are we justified in feeling like that?
So, AITA?

Edit: I've added a comment for further clarification of a few points I've seen asked in the comments and my PM's. Please refer to that if you have any questions.

Edit 2: I'm seeing quite a few racist comments in this post, and to the people that are making them, I have this to say: fuck you. Fuck off with that rethoric. I do not appreciate it, and would rather if you guys left.

My boyfriend Carsen (23M) is saying i'm a crazy girlfriend for getting mad about this so i need to figure out who's wrong. Basically we've been dating for 6 months now and i've caught him liking a bunch of other girls thirst traps on IG so many times now, it's like a monthly argument over some new girl he begins crushing over. Any time he begins following a new random girl i check her recent posts and every single one of them he likes, and on top of that he comments under super revealing photos of them in a bikini with a bunch of heart eye emojis like this 😍😍😍

His argument is it's his spam account so he isn't using his main to follow these girls, but for me that's not the issue it's the fact that he's doing it in general. I don't think it's right for a guy to be crushing over some random girl on the internet when he has a girlfriend. He claims that with guys it's purely visual and as long as no emotion is involved it doesn't matter. But like how does that make any sense? Keep in mind he gets super jealous when i even talk to another guy.

I may be a bit crazy stalking everyone he follows but i only started doing that when i caught him the first time. now it's like i need to keep tabs on his newest girl. is this normal for guys to do? maybe most guys are like this he's just not very good at hiding it

My daughter, Emily (15) went to a sleepover at her friend, Amanda’s house last weekend. Emily’s known her for a couple of years and we know her parents well. This was a party for Amanda’s birthday. Emily has been to sleepovers before, but this was her first at Amanda’s house.

Around 10 PM, I get a call from Emily. She says that everyone at the party has already fallen asleep which wouldn’t be an issue but Amanda and 2 other girls are snoring. She tried to fall asleep too but couldn’t and really didn’t want to be there all night. Yes, at sleepovers, usually you stay up late…but you’re also doing that together and having fun. She was sitting by herself, bored and unable to sleep. I said I’d be right there and told her to let Amanda’s parents know. I also told her to be quiet so as not to wake the other girls.

When I arrived, Emily told me that Amanda’s parents were asleep. I tried calling both of them from my phone but it went to voicemail. Ultimately, I left a note on the counter as well as texted both parents to let them know I picked up Emily and was taking her home.

I was woken up at 5:30 AM by Amanda’s mom freaking out and asking why I had taken Emily without letting them know. I said they were both sleeping and didn’t answer their phones. She said one of us should’ve woken them. She said it was very rude for Emily to just disappear like that. I didn’t want to embarrass Amanda or anything but as her mom kept pushing on the issue, I told her why Emily asked to be picked up. That only aggravated her more and she said that Emily could’ve slept anywhere else in the house (they were in the rec room, so Amanda’s bed was available). She said that Amanda was going to be very hurt when she woke up and Emily wasn’t there with no explanation. I said to just tell her that Emily got sick and had to go home in the middle of the night but didn’t want to wake her. Amanda’s mom ended the call basically saying that they won’t invite Emily to sleepover again.

Emily says that things have been fine between her and Amanda, she doesn’t think Amanda’s mom told her anything about it.

My husband and I have gone back and forth on whether or not I did the right thing. My husband agreed that Emily was right to leave the sleepover but as awkward as it would’ve been, one of us should’ve woken up her parents to let them know. I can see that side but a part of me feels like Amanda’s mom majorly overreacted. AITA?

My relationship has been troubled for many years, mainly since our two daughters were born. Our intimacy is non-existent, conversations quickly turn into fights, and she struggles to maintain composure in front of the children.

I am an addict in recovery. For nearly three decades, I’ve dealt with chronic pain, leading to a severe painkiller addiction. This addiction was present when my partner and I met and continued throughout our relationship. After 6 weeks of treatment, I am now 100 days clean. She blames all our problems on my addiction, despite others seeing me as a dedicated father even during my worst times.

Now that I’m clean, she seems lost on what to criticize. She exhibits signs of addiction herself, using cannabis multiple times a day, but refuses to discuss it. She calls me "righteous" now that I am sober, though I don’t impose sobriety on anyone. Shortly after my recovery, she pressured me into attending a party with drinking and cannabis. During fights, she insults me, calling me a "junkie" even in front of our children. Just last week, my 4-year-old tried to pull me away from her, saying to "ignore mommy," which breaks my heart.

The final straw was when she told me she planned to sleep with someone else after work. She expressed eagerness for her weekends alone to be with someone who fulfills her needs. I replied, "I can't wait to spend my weekends with my children," leaving her speechless. She often comes across as narcissistic, prioritizing herself, then me, and the kids last. She doesn’t understand that my priorities are my sobriety, my kids, and my job. Without my sobriety, I have nothing.

She has spent years tarnishing my reputation, calling me the narcissist and manipulator. However, our families and friends see her true colors, often witnessing her outbursts. They have distanced themselves from her, recognizing her projections. Despite several recommendations for her to seek professional help for her mental health, she refuses, considering such suggestions as insults.

I want to leave and take my children with me. She doesn't seem to care about anything aside from getting laid. I want to leave her, but she insists she is NTA.

Burner account

My (32F) brother's fiance, Chelsea (32 also), does not fit in well with our family. She's very loud and has never had a full-time job. Both my parents are in their mid-60s and continue to work full-time, with no ability to retire. I know her family has struggled even more financially. My parents have always been very kind to Chelsea, though blow-ups have happened with my Dad related to her chronic cannabis use and financial decision making

She and my brother announced their engagement around 2-3 years ago. This led to some intense planning and spending, despite their lack of money. Shortly after, they announce she is pregnant. They end up cancelling the reception, but only after losing the deposit. The baby has since been born.

Because we want people to have somewhere to go after their ceremony, my Dad offers to host a barbecue for them. Chelsea is initially hesitant, but eventually gets on board and creates a Facebook group with everyone she wants invited (including our extended family). She insists we not refer to the event as the "reception" because she still believes they will have the reception they intended at some point. She makes it clear in the group that we are planning the event. My parents and I get together and clarify roles. The budget is coming out at a couple thousand when you include food, chair rentals, etc. I make a website where people can RSVP.

I post the RSVP link to the Facebook group. Very shortly after, she starts peppering me with questions about food, etc. She seems pleased with my responses.

Then she asks, "is it gonna be a BOYB kinda thing or if were gonna be providing the alcohol?"

It's 7:00 in the morning. I inform her that we aren't providing alcohol and that my Dad prefers to not have alcohol because of liability concerns.

She absolutely explodes and sends me a slew of messages. Here are the highlights:

• a dry "reception" is stupid

• no one will come if the event is dry

• if people can't drink they will smoke tonnes of cannabis

• my family is judgemental

• it's not what she had envisioned for her day ("MY day")

I weather the comments, telling her to talk it over with my brother and bring up her concerns with my Dad.

She then says that if there is no alcohol there is no barbecue. She proceeds to delete my RSVP request off the Facebook group, and adds a post that says the event is cancelled "on account of no alcohol." This is mortifying to me - 20 people had already RSVP'd.

I'm livid, to the point that it affected me at work all week. I think she's ungrateful and entitled, and she has behaved atrociously towards the family she is joining. I sent her an angry message saying that she had disrepected my parents and that she had thrown my work in my face. To which she responded, "Nothings getting thrown in your face, it's cancelled unless we can make alcohol happen. Not a big deal."

She continues to insist that my parents and I are in the wrong.

AITA?

Edit to update: Thanks everyone for your feedback! I would reply to them all if I could. I'm getting the sense from the balance of comments that this is a true ESH. It's been helpful to hear from the YTA camp to reflect on my own role in the situation. In retrospect, hosting the event (for me) was definitely about pleasing extended family and not about the couple, which is wrong. In my defense, I did throw her a nice baby shower with my Mom and take her wedding dress shopping, so I was trying to be genuinely helpful at points. My Dad says he told them no alcohol but obviously she didn't understand (or he could be revising history). I'm one of her bridesmaids and I'm starting to think I shouldn't be after realizing how deep my resentment and judgment toward her go. Feel free to weigh in on how to handle that (lol).

Update to update: Lol well things have definitely skewed asshole since then! Just wanted to add for the folks who are being sweet and making suggestions to solve the issues, there's no need because the BBQ is off, as per the bride's request. We're definitely not going to push the issue. We have no plans to host anything after the ceremony because it could get awkward about who to include (more people were invited to the ceremony than the event following). I'm still working up the motivation to apologize to her, but getting outweighed by the majority has definitely made it easier.

Also to be clear, I drink and smoke cannabis as well! No hate to folks who do (well, maybe from my Dad, but not me!).

My daughter Ines is in the 8th grade. I am a single parent who is barely getting by. We can’t afford the activities for the graduating class like trips to New York, dances, etc.

I told Ines this and she seems to understand that we just can’t afford it.

I got called in to talk to her English teacher over a paper she wrote last month. The prompt was “what I did on spring break.”

Ines spent it at home or tagging along with me to my job. But instead she wrote this ten page story about how she found this door in the office I clean that took her to the past.

She wrote a short fiction story instead of the paper her teacher wanted. She got a D.

Ines wanted me to convince the teacher to change her grade.

I told her that she can’t submit short stories instead of homework, so she deserves that poor grade. But Ines said that she doesn’t have anything to work with otherwise she hates English.

We are going back and forth. She has a C in English and I told her she is grounded until she gets her grades up.

Ines is upset and won’t speak to me. I had another meeting with a school counselor who suggests that I’m being too harsh on her, and to encourage her to write more. That’s not the problem.

My problem is that Ines doesn’t listen to me or her teachers and acts like she’s living in that dimension in her stories. That’s not how the real world works.

AITA?

My (18 f) mom died when I was 7. My father aka step siblings dad remarried a year later. His new wife had 3 kids A (8 m) B (6 m) C (3 f). He said she wanted a dad for her kids and he wanted a mom for me. I remember telling himI didn't want a new mom. He said I would understand later. My step siblings dad basically stopped doing anything alone with me. No more camping nights in the back yard or movie nights which we had done every week for years. Nothing. He spent time with all his new kids 'to bond'. Its been 11 years and he still doesn't have time for me bc hes 'bonding with them.' He stoped coming to my games when I got to HS. His wife & I have nothing in common. I play three sports and I'm on the speech team. She's very girly and like girl trips to buy clothes and makeup at different malls. She knows I don't want to go but just tells my step siblings dad that she invited me. I have a teammate I play two sports with. Her parents have become like my own. She said she is totally fine with it. I've make sure all the time bc I don't want to take someone else's parents. But she's always the one to invite me over, brings her parents to my swim meets bc she knows no one will be there for me. Invitea me to go shopping for mother/father day gifts and says their from both of us. Her parents get me holiday gifts and say I'm always welcome. Senior night at basketball, I told her my step siblings dad isn't going to walk me around the floor bc he doesn't even come to games. She asked her dad to walk both of us and he was happy to. In a small town that made the paper bc they thought it was sweet. My step siblings dad flipped out & took us all to therapy. He asked why he hadn't been asked. I said bc he didn't come to games. He said he didn't know I played basketball anymore. I asked if that's why he didn't come to swim or softball when he couldn't miss A and B's practices. Or come to speech meets when he went to C's dance recitals. He just stared at me and said he didn't know I still did those either. I asked why he talked for days about B's camping trip but didn't ask about my senior trip to Mexico. He said he didn't know I went. I said he signed the form. He admitted he didn't read it. I asked if he remembered the last time I called him dad. He said he didn't know I stopped. I said May 13 2021. He said that was the day A B C started. I said I know. You stopped being my dad when you started being theirs. I walked out of therapy. Edit: I played all three since I was a toddler so I'm not sure why he thought I stopped. He never asked why I came home a couple hours after practice or went out on weekends for game days. When I talked about games, he said I thought I was just playing with friends bc all my friends play.

Update got deleted. Basically I'm getting some info on my trust and belongings it paid for. My friends dad tried to confront my step siblings dad about why I can't go over anymore but he just shut the door on him and I check in daily with my friend or her parents via phone. My step siblings are all mad at both their parents and are being very supportive.

I am very fat woman in my mid 30s, I love cooking and baking and I love to share. I often bring things to work for people to share. Well I gain 20 kilos last 2 years and I decided I really need to take better care for myself. I found a doctor, nutritionist and trainer few weeks ago and now I am following the regime they set for me

I have gluten intolerance, lactose intolerance, egg/seafood/celery allergy so it's not exactly easy to cook for me, but I worked with nutritionist and she has made "menu" for me for every day of a month. With amount of food an everything (calories counted). I spend a lot of time cooking every day and I am bringing food to work with me in Tupperwares. The thing is that according to the doctor I ate really wrong - I was all the time dieting and I didn't eat enough necessary nutrients. So the nutritionist prescribed me big portions, especially when it comes to proteins, because she wants me to exchange fat for muscles.

So to the issue - I brought tupper of salad, some potatoes and meat with sauce to work. The meat was cutted in 4-5 pieces to fit into the tupper and when I warmed it up I sat and started to eat. My coworker came to me and asked if she could have one or two pieces of the meat and a bit of potatoes because it smelled heavenly and I always bring cooked stuff to the office. I told her no, that it's my lunch and I have set amount of calories intake, so I am sorry but no. She looked at me and told me I don't need this big portion and I should share with her, because it would help me. I told her sorry, but no and kept eating. She scoffed and left me alone, but since than she and her "work BF" keep making fun of me for eating like a pig. And that it s not very effective weight losing since I am still fatty

So AITA?

For all the people with terrible need to give me health and weight loss advice. Keep it to yourselves, I am taken care of by professionals. THANKS!

Alright, I'm gonna ask the reddit folk on a 2nd account to weigh in on this.

I'm 34M, 155lbs. Usually after working long days (55-60hr work weeks) I come home, make dinner, then partake of a 6pk. Is this too much? I questioned myself a couple months ago and went a week without and felt fine but in the back of my head I keep judging myself when I picked it back up. I am very much in a manual labor field so usually something is hurting by the end of my shifts.

I should note - I don't think about it all day, I don't crave it, it's just become a nightly ritual of relaxing and taking the stress off. Doesn't effect any personal relationships and doesn't effect work at all. Just something I've become accustomed to.

let's get straight to the point, I (22F) am a full-time baker for a small business and college student. I moved back up to my home state in September of 2023, mostly to get away from my toxic family and for better opportunities. Also to add why this is even an issue in the first place, My brother Jay(25M) and I are the "black sheep" of the family, mostly due to the fact we were born and mostly raised outside of marriage. The teasing and neglect only grew worse after our mother(44F) married Jerkfish(54M) and had our half siblings; (20F), (17M), (16M), and (11M).

Now, here's the dilemma. My half-sister who we will call Jojo(20F) is getting married to Rhitt(22M) in July. My mom and grandma asked that I make them a wedding cake, which I would've happily agreed to if I was invited to the wedding. The thing is, they wanted me to make a cake fit for 200 people, get a hotel near them (They hate that I'm not a Christian, so they think I'll bring evil into their house), work for 3 days, and get a flight there and back. I'd have to pay for all of it, they think it'd be a nice gift to my sister. I just laughed and sent them my price sheet, they. flipped. out. I was bombarded with texts from them about how selfish I am, how I am truly vile, how I am toxic for expecting my family to pay for my cake when they could just go to Walmart to get one, etc..

Jojo even messaged me on discord a week after I had sent the price sheet and asked why I would charge her when I made my best friend a free wedding cake. I simply told her to f off as not only was I invited to her wedding, but I was the MOH and in a way it was a "returning the favor" for being a genuinely good friend and helping me out when I was going through a lot.

Jay and his wife had said I'm not wrong for it and they'd do the same thing, and my boyfriend is on my side. However, a few people in my life are saying I should've just said a simple no instead of sending the sheet and that my response to my sister was harsh. So, I need an outside perspective, hopefully other bakers on here too.

AITA?

My son died 4 years ago. He was my only child. The anniversary of his death was last week. Someone (we’ll call her Mabel) that I am not terribly close to who has never lost a child said to me (as many people do) “I understand your pain”. As usual, I responded with “I hope you never understand my pain” but when Mabel continued to talk and compare the loss of her father to the loss of my son and that after a “few years it will get better,” I lost my temper and I was nasty to her. Now Mabel has told several people how I acted and one of those people has, very kindly, told me how much I had hurt Mabel’s feelings and I should apologize. I don’t feel as though I owe her an apology. As a matter of fact, I feel like MABEL owes ME an apology. What do you guys think? AITA?

Not a race thing, but whenever I meet a Caucasian, they always smell fresh.

3 hours later, cologne smell still there.

Mine won’t last even 30 mins.

Is there a trick to applying it?