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I’m a robotfucker first and a person second

onemillionwordsofcrap:

Doylist explanation: They keep making new electric mouse pokemon because they’re frantically trying to recreate the success of Pikachu. Or at least because it’s tradition at this point.

Watsonian explanation: A major predator of rodents is birds of prey. A mouse that can deliver electric shocks to flying-types has a much higher chance of living to produce more offspring. Thus, convergent evolution fills this niche in every region. “Pikachu” is just the pokemon universe equivalent of “crab”.

professorllayton:

its kind of beyond fucked up that u don’t even have to be born in the 90s to be in ur 20s anymore. like they’re letting just fucking anyone be 20 now. u were born in 2004? sure yeah u can be 20 this year yeah no whatever man it’s cool . what the heeellllllll

moonlightmenace:

crispy-ghee:

if I say “I have to Austin Powers my car out of a parking space,” do you understand what i mean

like this?

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aavec:

raychjackson:

cheeso:

cheeso:

i have been in america lately and tried its Various cuisine’s here is my review

wendys

  • what i had: four for $4 burger and lemonade.
  • what i thought: this is the same as mcdonalds but there is a smiling girl! the guy who invented wendys was called somethng else so who is wendy. Food apparaition?
  • rating: 3/5. food was boring but mysterious girl warmed my heart

cook out

  • what i had: hot dog and shake
  • what i thought: holy shit. also milkshakes in america are like, solid ice cream. i was expecting nesquik
  • rating: 5/5. the hot dog was nauseating but cost a dollar and the cashier liked toys

steak n shake

  • what i had: you can only have burgers and shakes from this restaurant so thats what i got baby!! when in roam!! hasta la vista!!
  • what i thought: siri didnt know how to get there so we got lost on the highway at 1am. WOOPS!!! thats the american life
  • rating: 4/5. tasted like i was dying, but pleasantly

cracker barrel

  • what i had: friday fish fry up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • what i thought: there was lots of old people in this restaurant. the waitress avoided me because my nails were painted. this is a well documented phenomneom but biscuits are definitely something different in this country than my country
  • rating: 2/5. scary torture cabin

costco

  • what i had: piza slice
  • what i thought: i know this isnt technicaly a restaurant but drinks were 50 cents so it gets an honorable mention. there was a crate of mayonnaise but i didnt try that.
  • rating: ???/5. costcos most precious secrets are lost to us all

chipotle

  • what i had: burrito. do they make other things?
  • what i thought: the logo is a chilli pepper but there werent actually any chilli peppers you could have in the food? i enjoyed the dainty red basket
  • rating: 3/5. guess burritos just always taste good, no matter what theyre made of. i think the chipotle burritos were made using some kind of food product but im not sure.

sonic drive thru

  • what i had: loaded chilli cheese dog’ fourht of july baby!! happy star wars day
  • what i thought: very inconceivable. there is a sit in a drive in and a drive thru and the sonic drive thru person comes over to your car in roller skates. its a made up cartoon store. it doesnt exist
  • rating: 5/5. we spent 20 minutes googling if you tip at sonic and in the end we drove off so my guilt prevents me from assessing it poorly

taco bell

  • what i had: it only sells tacos in like threes so i got three tacos.
  • what i thought: its like a dorito with a leaf stapled to it. why is it called taco bell? also, who am i, inside?
  • rating: 4/5. i flung six tacos in the microwave when we got back and i enjoyed watching them roll over each other playfully -  made me think of my childhood and the political conspiracy around my birth.

sheetz

  • what i had: chicken nuggets at 2am
  • what i thought: it was interesting that about half of the items on the interactive menu ended with a ‘z’ rather than an s. while that was fun - i would not go so far as to say i died at sheetz but i certainly did not leave it in one piece due to the colossal spinning death blade embedded into the milkshake machine
  • rating: 5/5. ordering entirely through a little touchpad is a natural progression in a society of unwholesome, evil food production and distribution

my kind or content

Please read this whole thing because it only escalates the food related nonsense

ackee:

ackee:

everyone should be weirder about their ocs more.

fake movie posters and comic book covers. visual novels. rpg maker games. fics. websites dedicated to your ocs. custom oc merch to wear or decorate your house with. surreal art that some old guy from the 1600s woulda painted. i want to see it ALL

flareonfloof:

phoneticmeow:

fieldsarebreathing:

Does he mean anything to you

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girlballs:

savelindsaylohan:

🙁?

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Cake lyrics

majorleagueupdates:

BREAKING: the New York Yankees and the Boston Red Sox have been put in a “Freaky Friday type of situation” until they can learn to appreciate each other’s perspectives.

marikafoxtail:

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Needed to draw something chaotic today.



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