I really don't like twitter, and I haven't logged into my account in months (my anxiety thanks me) and I wasn't sure if I was going to announce anything anywhere and just ride off into the sunset, or if people even cared or noticed that I disappeared. But with the pride event coming up and my name being thrown around a fair bit I thought I'd address my disappearance and what's going on, and if I'm attending MCC pride this year.
To those who don't know, I have taken part in every pride event and my team has placed overall 1st each event (dodgebolt 3 times) and winning 2 of the 3 times! A lot of people say Pride is sort off THE event for Gizzy Gazza to pop off and people seem to be genuinely excited to see me each time (which is always a nice feeling!) I absolutely love MCC pride, and the people involved and the community and my team each year. And I'll always appreciate Scott and the noxcrew team for letting me be involved.
With that being said, I won't be taking part in Pride this year. It's not that I am traveling or busy, I just simply chose not to take part.
The reason is because I'm not entirely sure if or when I'll return as Gizzy Gazza. I never want to say "I am quitting" because I hate putting a full stop on things in life. A couple of months ago I randomly made a Runescape video after 10 years. Why? Because its fun! Maybe I want to randomly work on a movie/roleplay show when I have the drive/passion for it. Maybe I want to come back and make something that I find fun in a couple of years. I don't want to say I'm quitting and then come back in a few months. I did that in 2018 when I said I was quitting Minecraft to do animations and then eventually came back to Minecraft. I'm in a position in life where I don't need to make content for money. I want to use Gizzy Gazza as a creative outlet again like when I first started Youtube way back in 2009, and not because I need the money. Money wasn't even a thing in 2009, it was just fun!
Why did I stop Gizzy Gazza in the first place? Well the name Gizzy Gazza, as mentioned above, started in 2009. That's 15 years. A lot of people who used to watch me growing up now have their own kids!! (!!) I'm 31, I'm happily married, I bought a house, I have my dog (who I consider my son, yes I'm THAT kind of millennial) and I've done a lot of things in my 15 years I am very proud of (and some things I'm not so proud of). When I started Gizzy in 2009 it was a fun thing to do that turned into a career as I was given an opportunity because of my friends I made from Runescape started to do well in Minecraft who helped me out. When making a character in 2009 at the age of 14 I wish I could tell myself "hey maybe don't be the white guy with dreadlocks" but suddenly I had a million subscribers and it was too late lmao. What I'm trying to say is, can I continue to do Gizzy Gazza for another 15 years? 10 years? 5 years? As a JOB...Probably not.
You see, I'm not part of a community really, besides MCC. I'm not in hermit, or any SMPs, and I haven't spoken to a lot of Minecraft friends in a while (I still love you guys! Hoping everyone is doing good and I am on discord if you wish to say hi). The community I was in, the roleplay community, died off many years ago unfortunately. When trying to make Youtube work in 2021 I did a lot of studying and found the roleplay niche thriving with channels like Aphmau and Checkpoint, and knew if I wanted an audience in the roleplay space again I had to make content similar to them. So I changed my content, stopped making "series" content like shows and focused on episodic content for kids. 2022 was the biggest year I've seen for Gizzy in a LONG time, it also came with a curse. The different between Gizzy and Aphmau, was that Aphmau had a lot of content focused around herself and her friends with maybe a trend every now and then... Gizzy just did trends. The best way to put it is simply...most people who watched me was Gen Z, and then I started making content for Gen Alpha. While it was smart for me to make content for a new demographic, gen z was MADDD. I don't like going on Twitter because its very negative. I don't like seeing people talk negative about me. I get I can't please everyone (I've done Youtube enough to know you can't make everyone happy), but I don't have to be on a platform I don't feel welcomed. As I dug deeper into this younger demographic I realize most of them weren't subscribing for ME, and only wanted specific things like Garten of Banban, or Rainbow Friends. When it got to the point in August 2023 when I was barely breaking 10k views on a Minecraft Skibidi Toilet video, I took a step back and said... WHAT THE FFFFF AM I DOING. And I had to stop. I wasn't making content I liked, for people who weren't watching. I killed my name. My legacy. My reputation. It hurt me to see so many people turn against me for an audience who didn't care about me. I was hurt. The audience who once cared for "me" was long gone. That was my fault. I pushed them away. I'm sorry if I pushed you away. My brain went "this is my job, I need to make content that makes money" and I didn't put the audience first. I didn't put YOU first. I fumbled the bag. So I stopped.
To clarify... I LIKED the content I was making. I REALLY enjoy improv, and acting, and setting up a scene, and directing, and creating stories. I studied TV and video production for 5 years, and this niche made sense considering my background as a roleplayer and storyteller, I just hit the wrong crowd. I'm definitely envious of Aphmau and Checkpoint because they did it RIGHT, and I tunnel-visioned the wrong thing, and that was greed. Youtube is not easy guys lol...especially if you try to maintain an audience for 15 years.
If I was to make Gizzy Gazza as my brand again, I would need to make another channel for it to even get recommended outside of the "skibidi toilet kids" who won't click any of the videos I want to make, or it'll take a LOOOONG time for Youtube to recommend me to an audience outside of that crowd. And honestly, I'm exhausted with Gizzy. Its been 15 years. I take anxiety medication. I have therapy. I had a cancer scare a couple of years ago (all good but man that was a scary month), and I HAVE BACK PAIN GUYS. Instead of making ANOTHER channel for Gizzy, I decided it could be fun to make a new brand entirely. I work on a few faceless channels now that I manage and run, and its been very fun working with an amazing team I get to work with every day, and from what I've learnt through the mistakes of Gizzy Gazza, I'm fixing with my new brands to not fall into the same trap (I'm only human, let me learn from mistakes and continue to grow), And its REFRESHED my excitement for Youtube again, and I can see myself doing Youtube for another 10 years, just not as Gizzy. I've also been enjoying not having my face public and enjoying life as GARY and then doing Youtube as a job and growing a community. An example of this is Gizzy Gazza would barely break 30 viewers on a stream whereas my new brand gets over 100! I promise I'm learning from my mistakes haha
I wanted to make some kind of announcement but I didn't want to do it on Twitter. I don't like Twitter. I don't feel welcomed on Twitter. MCC I always felt welcomed and accepted. A lot of you guys watched me growing up and always rooted for me in the games, so I felt this was a fitting place to say something, to people who actually would listen to me and wouldn't be toxic or make me feel unheard. I truly appreciate anyone who watched at least ONE video of mine within the 15 years as Gizzy. I truly am happy, and I am satisfied with everything I have accomplished with Gizzy, and I'm ready to focus on the next chapter in my life with my new "job" on Youtube doing other things. And again, I don't want to say I'm quitting Gizzy, I just don't know if or when I'd return. I've love to make Clue 7 and maybe another Purge show. They were so much fun to make, I just don't have the drive right now to do Gizzy.
Sorry this had been a lot longer post than I thought it would be. I was just going to say I'm not doing Pride and then I couldn't stop typing and thought I might as well just say my peace. I'm sure this'll be shared around and that's okay. I'm happy, and healthy!