Almond

Is this a product of being owned by Spotify or living in LA?

I hate Chick-Fil-A and now I'm questioning everything.

Even before we had kids in the house my husband and I have stuck to this routine: eat balanced meals during the week and have treats on the weekend. Every friday we all pick a couple of treats from the store. Usually we all pick something like a small bag of candy, some chips and an ice cream bar or soda, things like that. We also like going to the farmer's market and the kids will get treats from there like ice cream or crepes or we'll go to brunch or dinner and they'll have dessert. We also like to bbq burgers and make homemade pizza often. So it's not like we don't have treats but we don't have it every single day. I try to have a positive approach to food, don't call treats junk food, validate the fact that they are great in moderation. Kids have access to fruit, yogurt, popcorn, cheese and other snacks all the time.

But now we have older kids in the house (10 and 12) and with that comes friends. One of my kid's best friends has a very different dynamic at their house. They'll arrive at school with sugary drinks from Starbucks every morning and their parents will take them to Chick-Fil-A after practice, sometimes with my kid who likes to sleep over with their friend. The parents will even drop off food from fast food places for their kid at their school at lunch time sometimes. That is CRAZY to me. I didn't even know that was allowed. Apparently it is. My youngest also talks about their friends always having candy or chips with their lunches. My kids are jealous and feel like they're missing out. The 12yo said their friend called me an "almond mom". That's not who I want to be.

I really thought I had a good balance. I feel like I'm wrong now. I try to be a responsible parent and I trust science and American Heart's Association tells me to aim for no more than 25g of sugar per day. Just a can of soda has way more than that. No more than 2 portions of fried foods during the week is another recommendation. It's not like I'm meticulously counting sugar or calories or anything like that for me or the kids but I do try to be mindful and stay somewhat within the limits most days, excluding the weekends, vacations, special dates, etc.

Now I feel like I am depriving my kids and I'm not sure what to do. Maybe have a Chick-Fil-A day of the week? My children are obsessed with that place for some reason, probably because I avoid it like the plague (because of moral reasons) and they only get to go when they're at their friend's houses so it's now the "forbidden fruit". It's not like I am depriving these children of chicken nuggets and fries, I've taken them to plenty of other restaurants. It's not really a hill I'm willing to die on.

I think my question is, am I an almond mom? Should I join everyone else at the Starbucks drive-through line every morning? Should I just ignore my morals and go eat at freaking Chick-Fil-A for once so my kids will stop talking about how their chicken nuggets are just so much better? How do you guys deal with this in your house?

My instinct right now is to find a compromise. Loosen up a little, let them have their drinks or fast food during the week every once in a while but mantain that it's not going to be an every day thing. But how often is once in a while? Once a week? I know they want to feel included and have these things their classmates have. My fear is that the more they have it the more they'll expect it and then suddenly I'm dropping off Taco Bell burritos at middle school so they can have it while it's warm.

Apparently it's called "roughage". It is "fibrous indigestible material in vegetable foods which aids the passage of food and waste products through the gut" which for example can be an almond. How come there are so many whole grains, nuts, seeds, legumes, fruits, and vegetables, that your body can't digest, but also helps digestion? To the uneducated mind, it sounds like an oxymoron.

the amount of water alone it takes to grow almonds is pretty asinine. There are other food products that are wasteful but almond milk for me is on top of the list

EDIT: jeez this took off, people are passionate about their milk/nut juice sources. i definitely shouldn't have made a post before i went to bed and not check on it, or maybe i should have disabled inbox replies

another edit: lol people spamming by inbox for being paid by the milk industry to post this need to get a life, no i didnt get paid by anyone to post. pretty close to deleting this post to get rid of all the dumb accusations i'm getting

I’m autistic and have pots so cooking fancy meals at the end of the day is unlikely for me but if anyone has recommendations for simple meals please comment/reply. I’m a vegetarian already since I was 12 and have been vegan and gluten free before but I’m finding it much harder than I remember plus the no almonds actually does limit things. I’m slightly picky but not about most foods. I just have so few options idk what to make myself that is fully vegan and gf.

I watch and engage in a lot of debates, and a strategy that seems to be gaining popularity (probably thanks to giant hot air balloon and internationally recognized twat Piers Morgan), is to ask Vegans if we eat avocados and almonds, and then point out the environmental impacts of those foods in order to make us look like hypocrites. You can see this in action . I'm starting to hear this from carnists in normal conversations about Veganism.

I very rarely see Vegans give a truly effective answer to this, so I thought I'd give mine, as it seems to work well:

"I don't eat any more avocados and almonds than I did when I used to eat meat, and neither do other Vegans I know. The reason is that nobody is replacing meat with avocados and almonds, but rather with things like tofu, seitan, and beans, which have far lower environmental impacts than even the lowest-impact animal product. Sure, many people (both Vegan and non) drink almond milk. I personally prefer Soy and Oat because they have the lowest environmental impact. It's great you care about the environmental impact of avocados and almonds. If you care about that, then you should absolutely care about the impact of animal agriculture, are you aware of the environmental cost of meat and dairy?"

Simple, prevents them from calling you a hypocrite, praises them for caring (which psychologically makes them more open to your side), and ends with a question that forces them to think.

What are your strategies for dealing with this question?

Anyone else have an 'almond mom' growing up?

my mom was a stereotypical almond mom. White, wealthy, thin, and concerned with status. She restricted our food,l (nevermind that i was a top athlete exercising 3-4 hours a day, I didn't need that potato). She was extremely preoccupied with "what the neighbors thought", and always had the most exquisite Marth la Stewart holiday decorations. I was a tomboy who could hardly be bothered to brush my hair out til i turned 15. Then I developed an eating disorder and a lifelong depression and anxiety disorder ( and no I do not attribute this entirely to her being an almond mom).

I just wonder how many people had an almond mom and how it affected you. This was around the time of the supermodel...then the rise of the 'waif' look with Kate Moss.....and the ridiculous "fat-free" cookies....then the "anal leakage" chips.

Women really couldn't catch a break back then.

Eta: TIL that anorexia was introduced to the DSM in 1981. Interesting.

Eta2: I thought almond mom was pretty well known! Okay, so for those of you who don't know WTH I'm talking about

EDIT: I cannot, for the life of me, get my comments to appear, so I apologize if it seems like I'm ignoring anyone. I need to clarify several things:

1. I live with my grandma in my MOM'S house. My grandma doesn't contribute financially to the household. I cover my portion, but she pays NOTHING. I have access to everyone's bank accounts in this house because I handle the bills, so I know. Multigenerational living is common in Asian and Hispanic households. I pay my share because I told my mom I wanted to. If I can't, she's said she'll cover it. I've observed that whenever someone mentions living with their parents/grandparents on Reddit, there's often backlash from individuals unfamiliar with this dynamic. I have no shame living with my mom. Except for one, all of my friends and coworkers who are millennials and Gen Zs (most of whom are Asians) live with their parents. Sorry?

2. My grandma receives assistance and has no bills, rent, or grocery expenses. She effectively has no living costs. We had to tell her to at least chip in when she wants to order takeout. She doesn't keep her money in the bank, so we're unsure what she does with her money, but it certainly doesn't benefit the family.

3. When I say I don't cry, I mean it. I can count the instances on one hand over the past 10 years. A friend called me the most stoic person they know. I do think that's at a cost of my mental health because I internalize some of my anger, but even still, I've grown used to "getting over it". I showed restraint by not yelling at or really confronting my grandma. I welled up privately in my room. For those suggesting I overreacted about the spilled milk: had she drunk all of it, that would be one thing (still upsetting, but at least it was used). If it was an accident, I'd understand. However, I believe her actions were malicious, which deeply upset me. Furthermore, I DETEST WASTING FOOD. A significant reason I'm vegan is my desire to lead an ethical lifestyle. Intentionally wasting food goes against what veganism stands for, which adds to my frustration.

4. Some are giving my grandma the benefit of the doubt, which I appreciate. However, my grandma likely has an undiagnosed psychological disorder and can be very vindictive. It's unpredictable which version of her I'll encounter. On days when she's antagonistic, I avoid eye contact. If she's in one of these moods, I come home from work to darkness, with her locked in her room. Occasionally, she shoots me ANGRY glares, and if eyes could be hands, it feels like she wishes to slap me. And to clarify, I haven't provoked these reactions. My mom is familiar with this emotional abuse; she's endured it all her life, and I've faced it in mine. That's just how she is.

5. My grandma isn't tidy. She doesn't clean the house (or herself for that matter) — that's left to my mom and me. She's in her 70s and is very mobile, so it isn't because she's physically unable to. This wasn't a case of her being responsible and discarding spoiled food. I think she partly wants to create more space for additional groceries she just received, but also because she hates that I take up any space at all in the fridge because I'm the only vegan in the house. She has (likely) expired Lactaid milk in the fridge right now. She discarded only my almond milk.

6. THANK YOU FOR ALL OF THE KIND OFFERS TO REPAY THE MILK! <3 Currently, I'm repaying medical expenses and handling personal bills, which has put a strain on my finances. I've exhausted my savings, so I don't have much disposable cash at the moment. However, I'm managing and can pay for my own food, and I apologize if I gave a different impression.

7. One last minor point. I guess plant milk longevity varies by region, but here in the US where I live, non-organic almond milk can last for months.

ORIGINAL POST: I need to vent because I'm so frustrated that I cried. I'm usually a stoic person, hardly ever shedding a tear, but this time, I couldn't hold back.

Last week, I bought a jug of almond milk. I don’t drink or use it every day, but I always consume it long before it has a chance to spoil. I've never had spoiled almond milk EVER.

Today, I went to pour myself a cup and couldn't find the jug anywhere. However, there's still a jug of Lactaid milk in the fridge that's been there for at least 2 weeks. But my brand-new almond milk? Gone.

I asked my grandma about it.

She claimed she dumped it because it had spoiled. But she’s 100% lying. I even double-checked to find out when I bought the almond milk, and it was less than a week ago, brand new. Just 2 days ago, it was perfectly fine. Please believe me it wasn't spoiled.

She wouldn't have known the almond milk was "spoiled" unless she opened it, and she does not drink milk of any kind. She wouldn't admit that she just wanted more space in the fridge and decided my almond milk should be the one to go.

I'm beyond upset. I didn’t raise my voice at her. I just explained how unfair it was and that I don’t have the luxury of wasting food like that. She receives free meals every week and also gets food stamps. No one else in our home drinks milk, so that Lactaid milk is surely from her free grocery deliveries. I don't benefit from such assistance, and I don’t touch her food.

The few dollars left in my account are for bills and groceries. Lately, I've been so strapped for cash it's scary. This entire situation has me feeling so uneasy; I'm overwhelmed by thoughts of the wasted food and money. It feels like such an invasion and is just so unjust.

I’m working really hard to find a better paying job and getting my finances together and am hoping to move out one day. I’m just incredibly frustrated right now. I don’t know what to do.