Achewood

This comic has permanently transformed my vocabulary. Favorites include “oh necessarily,” “all with the…”, “such as” and asking folks if they’re holding/“greened up”

Another article about the return of Achewood! Love to see Achewood getting any press, though this article is sadly focused on the AI aspect of the reborn Achewood we are all so concerned about.

Kind of a big item in here that I had NO idea about: Chris had teamed up with Pendleton Ward to develop an animated version of the Great Outdoor Fight?

I don't know if any of you Acheheads have seen this yet but Chris has a general call out for collaborators on the website.

"In 2022, I teamed up with a business partner to explore the potential of the Achewood universe. Not only did this lead to the relaunching of the strip, but also the expansion into new realms of content, platforms, and products. We found that simply by reaching out to talented readers, we formed friendships by whose nature cool new ideas came to fruition (such as ). There is a lot of goodwill in the Achewood readership, and it seems a squandered opportunity not to see who’s out there and what we might do together."

With Patreon breathing new life into the series, it seems like he's trying to do a thing (or variety of things) with anyone who's interested in helping to expand the Achewood universe.

Not many of these specializations apply to me, but maybe some of you fine chuckleheads are accomplished horologists, luthiers, or computer programmers.

if not, let's roll some off:

- Corliss Kazenzakis

- Mayor C. Finnegan Byde

-

go on, then. List 'em

"Cow Tools" is a Far Side strip that was famously confusing, lacking a a cohesive joke. As a nationally syndicated comic strip in the 80's and 90's many people were baffled by "Cow Tools". You can on the Wikipedia page if you're unfamiliar with it.

Achewood is full of surrealism and absurdist humor. But what strip is just beyond your comprehension? What is your "Cow Tools" of Achewood?

This is a work in progress, btw. Check back on it regularly.

So here is my situation. I have been a long time Achewood fan, like pretty much all of you I expect. I started reading, by my estimate, about ten years ago when I was sixteen. I don't want to seem given to claims, but I was all over the assetbar community. Sometimes I can even remember why Asherdan sucks, if I try real hard (I am not trying very hard right now and Asherdan is probably actually an okay dude). Having read it back to front many times (even the early stuff that is not what the celestials call, "dope") I resigned myself to knowing that Achewood would always be a beautiful part of me but that apparently soda and little paintings were the thing now. How much sweeter, then, the surprise of discovering the "honor club". I guess I had seen that one alt text about how honorclub stuff would be available to us broke plebs but never looked into it. "Ha, what a mistake!" It is so good, all. Do yourself a favour. Don't be like me, ever, but especially not in this regard.

Anyway. In the Print-Only Rarities collection there are two chapters of The Story of Achewood, a plain text "origin story" of Teodor moving into the Achewood house. It is pretty neat, and also good. The prose so crisp but friendly and accessible, so tinged with mysteries previously unknown. Under these chapters the margin advices that they and other subscriber only features can be found at "serializer.net". I was all in a lather. Then, all in tatters. I found that this website must not have been one of the better websites, 'cuz it totally doesn't exist any more, sort of like what will hopefully happen to Cracked soon now that it is also super bad. Thanks, Zuckerberg.

Anyway, does anyone know where I can get/read more of The Story of Achewood? Actually I'd guess that these two chaptres are all he wrote, which I would accept as an answer also (but only out of grim necessity). "Please advice?"

Cock, stranger, ever (never), etc., chochachos and non-chochachos.

P.S: what about that soda, anyway, is it any good?

Technically, the anniversary was a couple of days ago, the first strip was October 1st 2001.

• Todd shirt

• GODDAMNIT shirt

• King of the Make Outs shirt

• Circumstances shirt

• Comic Sans print & Momentary Diversion poster

All the shirts are American Apparel size medium. Bought them probably the better part of 15 years ago and they've been very rarely worn ever since. Just not my colors / I don't like the feel of big central prints.

The posters are from college essentially. They've got some thumbtack holes / adhesive stains / creases but the body of the prints are still quite good. I only have one appropriately long/thin box so they're a two-fer. I'll roll them up and hope for the best.

First come first served, one per person. Just post which you'd like and if/when I reply to confirm just PM me your shipping address and I'll take care of the rest. May your holidays be filled with skirt steaks and crispy stellas.

Edit: Apologies, even shipping something as small/light as a tshirt internationally appears to be prohibitively expensive. Going to have to keep it within the US, sorry about that.

I placed an order there several months ago and received a confirmation email and then nothing else. I've written several emails to the address provided and even dusted off my Twitter account to message Onstad on there (which felt intrusive and rude) but no response anywhere. Anyone have any advice?

UPDATE: I've received a notice that my package has shipped. Still nothing in response to my letters but relieving news nonetheless. Thanks again for all the input, folks. Stay safe out there.

It’s a slowish day at work so I found myself musing on which Achewood character was the closest to my personality. In the end I couldn’t settle on one of those beauties so I divided 3 of them into a composite package.

glass-cannon = 60% Ray + 30% Teodor + 10% Mr Bear

I was relieved to discover the absence of any Nice Pete or Pat.

The one I use most is probably

In my dream I was looking at an Achewood comic and I remember it pretty clearly, though the dialog is a little muddled up. I'll try to write it down but bear in mind some of it is paraphrased.

Panel 1: Roast Beef and Molly are walking around what looks like a shopping district.

Molly: So what do you wanna do today?

Roast Beef: I don't know. No, wait.

Panel 2: The two wander in front of another store. There's no sign to be seen. We can see a glass door and a metal opening for movie returns.

Roast Beef: Did you know this is the last Blockbuster store ever?

Molly: Really?

Panel 3: The panel closes up on Beef as he holds up a coin as he speaks. It's a big silver coin around an inch across. Molly smiles sympathetically as Beef speaks.

Roast Beef: I still have some of these Blockbuster special coins, and they still work at this store.

Panel 4: The panel closes up even further as Beef turns his back on the viewer (and Molly) and stands near the right corner of the metal opening. There's a metal square-shaped opening there, and he places the coin horizontally in it (it doesn't really look like a coin slot, but it seems to fit in somehow).

Roast Beef: We just have to put in the return slot and...

SFX: CLINK

Panel 5: Beef stands aside as black videotapes start sliding out of the opening, making a mechanical noise as they do so. Molly holds her arms out to hold the falling tapes, seeming surprised as they keep coming out and piling up. (Somehow, in the dream, I knew 8 tapes would come out, and somehow I briefly saw the scene in motion from Molly's POV as I held the tapes while they popped out.)

SFX: KA-CHUNK! KA-CHUNK! KA-CHUNK!

Roast Beef: There!

Molly: Wow! Do we have to return them later?

Panel 6: A close up of Beef's face. Nothing else in particular can be seen. He maintains his neutral expression as he speaks a single word:

Roast Beef: No.