This didn't actually happen today but it might as well have since it gets brought up so often. When me and my boyfriend first started dating i was staying at his apartment a lot. Like staying days at a time and only going home on weekends if that.
Well there was a time period of about 2 months where we started pranking each other. Nothing crazy just some harmless pranks that were so miniscule I can't even remember most of them. (Think changing the tv channel or putting an ice cube down their shirt) but there was one prank that started this whole thing. I was in the shower and he poured ice cold freezing water with ice cubes all over me. The bathroom was set up so that if someone moves sneakily you really wouldn't see them until it was too late so I was caught 100% off guard. A few minutes after when I warmed up again it was hilarious so I thought it was my time to get him back.
So using my logic I thought to myself, what would be the best prank ever, and I came up with the solution, "I'm gonna make him sneeze" and how do you make someone sneeze, according to all the shows I've seen in my childhood, just use blackpepper. So thats the first mistake.
He was sitting at his desktop and I went to the kitchen and poured the entire remaining bottle of blackpepper into my hand and went to go stand by him. Because in my logic, more blackpper= more sneeze. I called his name a few times and when he looked over at me I blew the entire thing into his face. He immediately fell to the ground screaming. At first I thought he was laughing so I was laughing too. But to my absolute horror when I actually looked at him there were tears pouring out and snot and screaming and I realized he was definitely not laughing.
I quickly grabbed some water in a glass and threw it in his face then grabbed some milk and threw it in his face and that calmed him down enough for me to grab him and shove him in the shower and turned on the water and forcefully opened his eyes under the shower.
I spent the next week apologizing and waiting on him hand and foot and he definitely took advantage lol but I'm surprised I had a boyfriend after that. His eyes were swollen, burned and bloodshot for 2 weeks after that. Apparently blackpepper is one of the main ingredients for pepper spray and mace smh. And he didn't even sneeze.
TL;DR Using cartoon logic I tried to make my boyfriend sneeze using blackpepper and broke the blood vessels in his eyes for 2 weeks.