Two men, an American and a Russian were arguing. One said,
“in my country I can go to the white house walk to the president's office and pound the desk and say "Mr president! I don't like how you're running things in this country!"
"I can do that too!"
"Really?"
"Yes! I can go to the Kremlin, walk into the general secretary's office and pound the desk and say, Mr. secretary, I don't like how Reagan is running his country!"
She was laughing really hard at my joke, then she suddenly said, "Uh oh..." and immediately jumped up and hobbled off to the bathroom. Oops.
Here's the joke (one of my all-time favorites):
A young woman was waiting at a bus stop. After a few minutes the bus arrived and the woman tried to step onboard. Unfortunately, her skirt was extremely tight and she couldn't get her leg up high enough for the step.
She quickly reached behind her and unzipped her skirt a little, but she STILL couldn't step up. She unzipped her skirt a little more. Still no luck. So she tried a THIRD time. Nope.
Suddenly, she felt a strong pair of hands grab her by the waist and lift her onto the step. Well, she was having NONE of that.
She turned around and saw a tall cowboy standing behind her. She got in his face and yelled, "How dare you! I didn't give you permission to touch me like that! I don't even KNOW you!"
The embarrassed cowboy looked down at his boots and said, "I'm sure sorry, mam. I just assumed we was friends after the third time you reached back and unzipped my fly."
They’ll be my border caulis.
