Chanting

Once upon a time, when professional footballers upon this island were virtually all born and raised here, a certain congratulatory chant was always easy to adapt. To the tune of the Cuban patriot song , "Guantanamera", it went like this:

One **** ******!

There's only one **** ******!

One **** ******!

There's only one **** ******!

Yes, one Bobby Charlton, one Jimmy Greaves, one Norman Hunter or over at my beloved Hull City - one Ken Wagstaff, one Chris Chilton and one Ian Butler - after whom my son Ian was named (even though I never told the wife!).

Nowadays, the names of players in the English Premier League and in the English Football League may not be anything like the simple and familiar British names of yore. It might be more challenging or even impossible to adapt the old "Guantanamera" tune.

Take Chelsea for example. They have a player called Carney Chukwuemeka and Liverpool have a Hungarian player called Dominik Szoboszlai. Arsenal have  Oleksandr Zinchenko and Amario Cozier-Duberry but the most challenging player name of all time must belong to a Dutchman who played for Hull City - Johannes Vennegoor of Hesselink. Imagine the crowd chanting that...

One Johannes Vennegoor of Hesselink!

There's only one Johannes Vennegoor of Hesselink!

One Johannes Vennegoor of Hesselink!

There's only one Johannes Vennegoor of Hesselink!

Fortunately perhaps, Johannes Vennegoor of Hesselink, now forty five years old, hardly ever played well enough to attract such acclaim, scoring just three goals in thirty one appearances.

By the way, the mighty Tigers (Hull City) beat Cardiff City by three goals to nil yesterday afternoon and now sit fifth in the Championship table after twenty one games. Furthermore, and for your utter amazement, I have written about football chants before - go here.