Carry On Columbus

These coronavirus jokes are just going to run and run.

PS - Mr. Griffiths is that rarest of breeds: he once voted for the SPGB.

Catch-0.22

Some kind soul posted the Euro-Election results for Oxford a few minutes ago. Still no sign of the SPGB surge. Maybe next year, Rodders:

Manic Internet Preacher

Whilst the SPGB website continues to do its extended impersonation of Lord Lucan, here's just another cheap excuse to once again bring attention to the Socialist Standard Past and Present blog. This morning it chalked up its 8,000th post. Telegrams were read, hosannas were sung and Paul Hollywood refused my request to bake a cake.

Feel free to check it out at your leisure. Discover new (old) Socialist Standard writers such as May Otway, John A. Dawson and Eddie Critchfield. (All top notch writers, in my humble opinion). Sit and wonder if any SPGBers went to the cinema before 1943, and, just think, if the early Impossiblists had hated capitalism as much as they hated John Burns and Will Thorne back in the day, we'd have arrived at socialism  thirteen years before the "White Horse" FA Cup final.

http://socialiststandardmyspace.blogspot.com/

Watford Shopping Centre

Via Facebook

A follow up to the album challenge.

Day #7
With no explanations, post ten books that have made their mark on your life. Once a day, post the book cover and nominate a new person.

JP (QPR)

Bog Standard Socialist Propaganda

Never been there, never done that.

Should I have gone with the other title of 'A Socialist Splash'?

XXXing the UK

On this day of days a funny picture from a good soul over at Facebook:

And just because I'm a lazy blogger these days . . . months . . . years decades that's no excuse for not me pointing you towards the 'Voting for Socialism' post over at the SPGB's election blog. The SPGB is standing in the Lambeth & Southwark and the Merton & Wandsworth GLA constituencies. My old friend Danny, who is the SPGB candidate in Lambeth & Southwark, is featured in a ten minute video over at The Big Smoke website.

Check it out.

SPGB makeover

The SPGB's website has had a revamp so it's your perfect excuse to check out their website again after all these years.

I'll be busy repairing all the broken links on the blog that go back quite a few years. *grumble, grumble*.

Manchester, So Much To Answer Four

It's that time of year again, people. (Cue cut and paste.)

Anarcho-Stalinist-Wobbly-Zapatista surfer dudes The love child of Dane Bowers and Guy Garvey has the Christmas number 1, and Manchester Branch have once again issued details of the quiz from their end of year Branch social. It's the usual routine on the blog. I reproduce the quiz questions below. I place my own pisspoor answers in the comment box. Not ONE of my seven three readers - what with me just reading books and half-watching films it's been a fallow year for the blog - join in the spirit of the season by trying to supply their own answers and I then post the correct answers in the comments box at a later date.

. . . .Oh, and I once again use a variation on the same post title that I always use for the Manchester Branch end of year quizzes because I can't think of any wittier alternatives, and this year it actually makes sense.

Your starter for ten nine:

1. Which song contains the following lines?

In our hands is placed a power greater than their hoarded gold,

Greater than the might of armies, magnified a thousand-fold.

We can bring to birth a new world from the ashes of the old.

2. How many members did the Party have at its foundation?

3. He was born in Leeds in 1884; Kropotkin taught him to skate; Lord Alfred Douglas sued him for libel; he was the only British journalist present at the founding of the Comintern; he married Trotsky's secretary; he was an agent for MI6; he wrote a best-selling series of children's books. Who was he?

4. Who wrote many theatre reviews for the Socialist Standard in the 1990s?

5. Who was Dic Penderyn?

6. Who was Philoren, and what was the title of his book?

7. Why is Edmund Wilson's book on the background to the Bolshevik Revolution called To the Finland Station?

8. Two people were expelled from the SDF at its Burnley conference in 1904. One was Horace Hawkins; who was the other?

9. What happened in Tilbury on 22 June 1948?

Get googling guessing.

"Wearing badges is not enough . . ."

. . . but I've always had a soft spot for this one:

Now, where can I find a button hole?

Mention of the SPGB badge in the comments to this old post from Alan J's blog.

Just in: SPGB result in Vauxhall

To my shame I haven't really been covering the election on the blog. I can't make excuses about being 4000 miles away. I've been looking in. I just haven't got my political mojo at the moment.

I should, however, mention the SPGB result in Vauxhall. (Click on the pic below to enlarge.)

It's the usual sort of vote for the SPGB that reflects the level of socialist support in any part of the world. Genuinely surprised - and pleased - that they beat Trotskyist candidate. (Yep, I'm that shallow).

I actually thought that Workers Power's shopping list of demands would have garnered more votes than the SPGB at the election. Just goes to show that sectarianism wins out every time. All those Tankies, Swoppies, Millies and Perm Revs in Vauxhall, and they couldn't bring themselves to vote for the vanguardist candidate on their doorstep . . .with the petition and the paper.

The rejects from the Second International 1 The Fifth International 0.

. . .Oh, and the Labour candidate, Kate Hoey, got 21,000 more votes than us both combined. But that's just a minor point.

Mixing Politics and 365Watch #1

I've not been mixing it much lately, so, as the blog is currently in film watching mode, I've decided to kick-start a series entitled, 'Mixing Politics and 365Watch'.

I can't guarantee that it will have the longevity of 'Mixing Footie and Politics' or the studied obscurantism of 'Mixing Pop and Politics', but I do promise irrelevance and responses of 'What the fuck is he on?'*

Inspired by the Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon trivia game, the idea is that I will take a film that I watched as part of 365Watch and somehow link it to fringe left-wing politics. The more tangential the connection the better. The more obscure the politics? All the more in keeping with the blog.

Of course, such a series should start with the usual suspects. From Dustin Hoffman to the SPGB in 3 moves.

Last night I watched the 1969 movie, John and Mary, starring a buttoned-up Dustin Hoffman and an eyebrow-less Mia Farrow.

Adapted by John Mortimer, the script is based on Mervyn Jones's 1966 novel of the same name.

Mervyn Jones? Only the same Mervyn Jones who reviewed Barltrop's The Monument: the Story of the Socialist Party of Great Britain in the pages of New Statesman in 1975. (The review wasn't as hostile as you would have thought. It wasn't that glowing, either.)

Sorry, it doesn't get any better.

*'What the fuck is he on?' Lack of bastard sleep.

Manchester, So Much To Answer Three

It's that time of year again, people.

Anarcho-Stalinist-Wobbly-Zapatista surfer dudes have the Christmas number 1, and Manchester Branch have once again issued details of the quiz from their end of year Branch social.

It's the usual routine on the blog. I reproduce the quiz questions below. I place my own pisspoor answers in the comment box. Not ONE of my seven readers join in the spirit of the season by trying to supply their own answers and I then post the correct answers in the comments box at a later date.

. . . .Oh, and I once again use a variation on the same post title that I always use for the Manchester Branch end of year quizzes because I can't think of any wittier alternatives.

Your starter for ten:

1. 'On a summer day in the month of May a burly bum came hiking/ Down a shady lane through the sugar cane, he was looking for his liking./As he roamed along he sang a song of the land of milk and honey/ Where a bum can stay for many a day, and he won't need any money.'

Which song?

2. What is the subtitle or alternative title of News from Nowhere?

3. In 1907, why did the Party pay £2 to Richard Bell, secretary of the Amalgmated Society of Railway Servants?

4. What happened in Derbyshire on 24 April 1932?

5. Which Party member was known as 'Two Shirt'?

6. Which footballer refused to give a Nazi salute when England played Germany in Berlin in May 1938?

7. Which year were the big Party meetings at the Metropolitan Theatre?

8. Who were the four people who threw Engels' ashes into the sea?

9. Who was Ishi?

10. Where do Blackburn Rovers play?

Get guessing.

SPGB'itis

We've had the staples: Small Party of Good Boys and Simon Pure's Good Brand are the best known, for instance.

We've had the witty Small Party of Glesga Bookies (as the local branch in Glasgow was known in its early days because, it turns out, a number of its members were bookies) and we have had the just plain abusive Smug Pricks and Gobby Bastards (just made that one up but I've yet to copyright it).

But I think the old school playground nicknames all fall by the wayside with Julian V from Enfield and Haringey Branch's recent suggestion on the Party's discussion list that the SPGB now stands for Senile Pensioners in Geriatric Bathchairs. The bloke's got form in the witty stakes. It was Julian who came up with the title of 'Socialism Or You Money Back'.

Sterling Cooper's loss was the SPGB's gain.

Cheeky opponents and the usual malcontents will riposte that they've been referring to us as that for years, but it's no good now mentioning that now on the commentary of your latest dvd. Prove your point by providing the requisite YouTube clips from those Arena specials you were on all those years ago. Otherwise, button it or we'll send the youth section around to have a word, brew a pot of tea and share some Werther's Originals.

The Branches That Meet in Caffs

I'm intrigued. Tell me more.

Insert your rewritten Dexys Midnight Runners song title here. I've already had a go. (See above.)

Raleigh for socialism

It has to be said that there are some strange types on the web

Looking for this bloke.

Face off

Clinging onto the back bumpers for dear life, the SPGB finally climbs aboard the Facebook bandwagon:

Socialist Party of Great Britain Facebook Group

Socialist Standard Facebook Group

Feel free to grab onto the toggles of our collective anorak.

Coming Soon:

The SPGB on Twitter . . . but only once it's truly passe.

Be brief with your case

The blogger formerly known as Possibilist Bill guest posts over at Dave's Part on why - and why you should not - vote for the SPGB in London in the coming Euro-Election.

Dave prefaces Bill's post with that old David Widgery Russian Revolution quip, and Bill finishes his post with my favourite William Morris quote.

Two thoughts in two days

Adam and the Ants - 'Stand and Deliver Leaflets'

Still the funniest EVER joke about the SPGB. Maybe you had to be there . . . in the SPGB, I mean.

I'll be at the laundromat if you need me.

Manchester Branch - So much to answer for

Via the SPGB's discussion forum comes the questions from the quiz at the 2008 Manchester Branch Social:

1. 'Look around the mountains, in the mud and rain,/ You'll find the scattered crosses, some that have no name./ Heartbreak and toil and suffering gone,/ The boys beneath them slumber on.'

Which song?

2. What is the origin of the word 'boycott'?

3. Which Party member had a picture of Marx on his wall and told Special Branch it was Johannes Brahms?

4. With which industrial dispute is the song 'Which Side Are You On?' associated?

5. From which novel is the following exchange taken?

'... you sound just like my old man.'
'Is he a socialist?' Reid asked. He sounded incredulous. 'Lifelong SPGB member,' I said.

'SPGB? Oh, brilliant!' Reid said.

'What's the SPGB?' Myra asked.

6. Who killed Hattie Carroll, and when?

7. Which current Party branch (excluding Central Branch) is the longest-surviving?

(a) under the same name

(b) allowing for changes of name

8. What is 2807 Karl Marx?

9. Who or what is the Spartak Moscow football club named after?

I've been out the mix too long. Off the top of my head - and without resorting to google - I think I know two four of the answers.

They're promising the answers tomorrow, and I'll post them in the comments box alongside my excuses.

Socialist Party meeting: 'Capitalism in Crisis'

There'll be a meeting on "Capitalism in Crisis" this Saturday 18th October 7.30 p.m. at the Socialist Party Head Office, 52 Clapham High St, London SW4 (nearest tube: Clapham North)

Capitalism in Crisis

With the banks refusing to lend to each other the flow and circulation of global capital is being disrupted on scale not seen since the depression of the 1930's. Share values have declined and major financial concerns are under pressure from the credit crunch. There have been massive bail-outs and buy-outs or state intervention and nationalisation in an effort to save the situation for capitalism. But whatever happens the short-term prospects for capitalism globally look bleak now that the consumer bubble fed by easy credit has finally burst.

The only course of action now open to the powers that be is to get us to tighten our belts till the economy starts picking up. How long this will take is anybody's guess for in the cutthroat world of competition the market determines who survives and who goes under. What is clear is that millions of workers will be unemployed. And consequently poverty will increase, health will deteriorate, homelessness will grow, deprivation and destitution will accelerate, crime will multiply and, in the so-called Third World, food riots become a regular occurrence.

This is nothing new because throughout the history of capitalism there is only one course of action available. In short - no profit no production. However, despite what the supporters of capitalism would have you believe there is one course of action available to the workers. The capitalist class won't even contemplate it because it means a future without profits, private and state ownership, borders, money and inequality. Find out more about the economic crisis we now face by coming to the meeting.

More information about the Socialist Party:

Email: spgb@worldsocialism.org

The Socialist Party of Great Britain website