Shit And Shine – "Everybody's A Fuckin Expert" (Editions Mego – eMEGO 212) 2015

The title of this, quite frankly, 'Dancey' album, kinda sums up the excrement filled creek that we are all stuck up without a paddle.

No-one likes a clever dick,and increasingly its the people who are patently NOT clever dicks who own the spare paddles, dragging us further into the more inaccessible regions of shitsville.

Sometimes we need,....really need, experts.You don't have to be friends with them, just acknowledge that they may know more stuff than you and let them get on with making our lives better rather than worse,and......a contentious point here....maybe even help save the planet from an impending environmental disaster.Be very careful what you say is a 'Lie' even if its backed up by 99% of all experts on the subject,because you just may be......MAYBE ,wrong(!?)......incredible as it may seem?All that "Research" you've done on facebook and YouTube, can sometimes mean you have read a lot of stuff that is in fact just made up bollocks.The scientists are quite prepared to admit they are wrong,whereas the University of Facebook just makes up more junk to further bury the actual Facts under a sludge pile of shit,that may never be cleaned up.The odds are, they are right, and you, a borderline Moron,are NOT! 

If they are lying participants in the greatest conspiracy the planet has ever known,then ....great...no harm done? But, if they are correct...and it looks like they ,the Experts,are; the we are well and truly FUCKED.

Donald Trump considers himself an 'Expert' in may area's,the main one is being an ignoramus of the nth degree.This appeals to the human ego, as no-one wants anyone smarter than them telling them what to do,do they?

A classic TV moment on British TV on the subject of the unbelievably brainless 'Brexit' debate,was when Pro-Brexit Government minister, Michael Gove, brought forth the vote-winning mantra  "People have had enough of Experts from organisations with acronyms saying they know what is best and getting it consistently wrong"!?.......the 'people' word is always used by nazi's and nationalist jerk-offs in general.

 .......says the lizard face fucker who has consistently fucked up every job he's ever had in Government.

The greatest example of this Brain reverse wiring has to be Trump asking his panel of soon to be saked experts, if they could somehow get light into the body

"Maybe you can, maybe you can't,I'm Not a Doctor, i'm just a person who has a good You Know What"

That video should just be played on a loop and streamed 24/7 to every social media device in the dumbest parts of the USA. Trump cleaning up the dumb vote will be a disaster of terminal proportions.At the very least it will result in Putin becoming the King of Europe,with at least the UK and Ireland being uninhabitable. In Russia, all the Experts are either poisoned, or in jail for life.

We Need Experts basically, or we is F.u.c.ked!

This is what Shit and Shine are alluding to in my Expert opinion.

Which explains the very Dance orientated nature of the lovely music contained within.Appeals to Dumb-asses and experts alike.

A call to end this celebration, and...word of the week.....'Weaponization', of Stupidity'

Tracklist: 1 Signal Failure 2 Upside Down Cheeseburger 3 Bus Station 4 Wespennest 5 Hay Ride 6 Chop The Night 7 Working On My Fitness 8 Picnic Table 9 Ass 10 Rastplatz 11 Stockwell 12 Clapham North DOWNLOAD expertly with expertise HERE!

Shit And Shine – "Shit And Shine" (Judgement Dispenser – JD#003) 2009

 As 'Industrial' music goes,it's hard to distinguish which 21st century acts display an acceptable face of product development as opposed to a bunch of Metalheads who heard Second annual report and a whitehouse LP,and mistook them for the new Sunn(((((0 album.

You can't blame 'em i suppose,as Metal inhabits the same musical dead-end as  Industrial musik does, and almost the same preponderance to invent as many sub-genres as possible to counter the valid accusations that it all sounds the fucking same!? 

The source of much of the problem is a wanton lack of a sense of humour, in both genres and their related,and very very silly, Sub-generic kissin' cousins .

Basically there's also so fucking much of this stuff, especially within the Industrial bracket,as its i actually a lot easier to make than almost any other form of Rock'n'Roll and its derivatives.You do actually have to have some basic skills to make a Doom Metal record,whereas in the grey Industrial hinterland, you need nothing except a lap top these days.In the old Skool tapes, that consisted of a double cassette deck, an echo box,a mike, and a distortion pedal, which actually looked better perched on a couple of Milk crates than the now standard two twats and a laptop,

Can't really think of any Metal bands with a sense of humour actually,but there are a few Industrial derived combo's who show this admirable trait, even if it is lost in the diaspora of uncountable generic Industrial MP3 files that are threatening the existence of any musical maldives out there in this too much of everything world we are saddled with for the near to mid-term future...if you can call it a 'Future'.

I can think of Smell and Quim and various offshoots, and this multi-drummer drone-psych-noise unit similarly tongue in cheek combo from the UK, Shit'n'Shine.

It could have been the name of a seventies cleaning product were it not for the naughty word,like a power electronics version of the Shake'n'Vac song.

The first side of this C-40 treats us to a unifying blend of Doom Metal as it should sound,and soul-crushing noise. Side B, is more yer power Electronics, but without the fucking silly murder stuff.Its brutal,and doesn't take prisoners or itself too seriously.Sadly,my only criticism is that this combo do that 21st century thing of releasing too many records, and they are on the great diluter site of Band-fucking-Camp. You can get dozens of the same thing here if you're so inclined.....it's all good,but not allllll good if you get what I'm sayin'?

Industrial culture has been watered down so much there's nothing left to cancel,and the product description is verging on the illegal.I wager even yer bank manager has invested in an original Leather Nun cassette,and a few VOD Sutcliffe Jugend box sets.Its all about as subversive as a Jeffrey Archer novel.

Recorded live in Belgium I gather?

Tracklist:

Side A (20:01)

Side B (20:08)

DOWNLOAD to do the shit'n'Shine to put the odour back HERE!