I don’t believe in ghosts, at least not in the paranormal apparitions sense where the soul or spirit of the deceased, dressed in white, hang around the physical realm. There are times though, when I’m
in the house or the garden, that I can hear Isaac. I know it’s not him, either physically or astrally, he’s not actually there. But sometimes when I’m doing
something (usually something mundane and ordinary) I hear him (in my head) speaking, commenting
on what I’m doing, saying something he’d often say in those circumstances or asking me a question- 'Where you going Dad?' or 'What you doing Dad?'. Rationally I
know it’s my mind or my memory playing tricks on me but it can be quite bewildering because it comes unexpectedly and with no trigger that I can discern.
It’s a strange phenomenon and makes me realise that in the
past, in a world of dimly lit, smoky houses full of shadows, with a lesser understanding
of science and a more religious or superstitious mindset, that a belief in the existence of ghosts
was easy to have. The flicker of shadows, a door that was ajar closing and the
voice of the departed suddenly playing in a person’s head. Ghosts feature in almost all recorded human societies. I think this experience I have when I hear Isaac’s
voice must be universal.
In the kitchen on Sunday morning, his voice in my head asked
me why I was taking my breakfast outside. Because Isaac, it’s beautiful
out there and the sun is shining on the garden table.
It makes me stop in my tracks when it happens. And then it
goes away. It doesn’t carry on or turn into a conversation, it's just me hearing him, on occasions, at home.
Grief- it's a fucking weird, heavy and intense thing to live with.
Khidja are a Romanian duo based in Bucharest making experimental electronic music, trippy house and on this song, which is perfectly named for this post, strange, off kilter science fiction techno, Vangelis on mushrooms. The EP, released in 2022 and titled Something In the Water is here.
