a safe place.

unless you’re adding to my life and making a positive change, I don’t see a reason for us to be connected

my toxic trait is isolating myself in order to feel better when all i really need is a hug and someone that tells me it’s gon be alright

Green Lobs 🦞 Via: @justinswar_

I’m officially at the age I don’t want to be around people who are not self aware. Continuously putting themselves in bad positions, making bad life choices, toxic ways/lifestyles, no priorities lacking accountability etc.

prettiest girls be the saddest

Children/teens aren’t allowed to be sad or in a bad mood because they can get yelled at for it and ridiculed and told to ‘change your attitude or I will for you’, while adults who are sad or in a bad mood, are allowed to yell at and take their frustration out on the kids. Adult privilege huh?

And when the adult is in a bad mood, it’s the kids job to step on eggshells in order to keep them from not exploding, and when they do, it’s on them.

And when the child is in the bad mood, it’s their job to try to hide it, and when they break apart trying to, it’s on them.

What extra sucks about this is that adults literally have more experience, context, perspective, and brain development to help them manage emotions. Adults who do this are shit. We are the adults, we should not be expecting kids who are still developing and learning about the world and trying to figure out their place in it to be the ones who are emotionally mature. 

People who treat adulthood like a power trip are honestly shit and should not have authority over kids. 

i don’t think people understand that people can ‘love’ you and not actually love you

like my grandmother ‘loved’ me, but she also was always trying to change me.  she tried to take me away from my (catholic bisexual) mother.  she made me wear dresses when i was there.  she always tried to get me to go to church and was always asking me if i was dating a boy yet

i spent years feeling guilty that i wasn’t what she wanted me to be until my mom told me one day “she never bothered to know the real you”

and it’s true.  any time i tried to show her something about myself, even cook for her, it would be dismissed, and a replacement would be offered.  even northern food was somehow a sin.  

she loved me what she thought i should be, she never loved me.  

bc people who love you, they love you for all the stuff that makes you you.  they never consider that it makes you inconvenient.

“It was true: the other mother loved her. But she loved Coraline as a miser loves money, or a dragon loves its gold.“

Loving someone like a prized possession is a very different thing from loving someone like a person you care about.

i think cutting family members who have hurt and traumatized you out of your life is very fun and fresh and sexy and i think that people who says things like “family is family” or question people for their choice to do something like that have no understanding of just how bad it can be

moms b like “your emotional pain causes ME emotional pain and that is what we will be focusing on today”

moms also b like “my mom traumatized me more than i traumatized u so clearly u should be thanking me”

then moms finish you off with a very intense retelling of their own trauma with absolutely no correlation to the topic and then somehow make you feel guilty about the fact they were abused at one point????

- V. J.