Full spoilers for the film below.

This dick head takes his girlfriend out into the woods.

He's offered a map, he rejects it, insisting he knows the woods so well that he doesn't need it.

Him and his girlfriend go off in a canoe to some site where they're going to hike from. When they get there he realises his girlfriend has brought bear spray which he makes fun of her for. She attaches it to her belt loop, which he find hilarious. She also has a road flare, which he makes fun of her for, it being the wrong type of flare. He scoffs that you can get a more suitable flare from any camping shop. He hasn't brought any flare of his own despite it apparently being so easy.

While they're hiking they meet a guy who is posing as an Irishman despite the fact he's clearly never heard an Irish accent in his life. The fake Irishman is an obvious weirdo, but our hero invites him to stay for dinner to look good in front of his girlfriend. The Irishman clearly knows what he's doing as an outdoorsman and our hero does not, which makes our hero feel very emasculated. It also becomes clear that his girlfriend is a smart woman.

That night his girlfriend is woken by noises outside the tent. She wakes him and he insists it's acorns, even though they hear a noise which they both agree clearly is not acorns. They think it might be the fake Irishman. Nevertheless, the boyfriend doesn't bother checking and just tells her to go to sleep.

The next morning they continue hiking, with our hero insisting he knows where he's going. On the way to their next camping spot he sees a big bear footprint, which he declines to mention to his girlfriend when she asks why he stopped.

They set up camp somewhere else for the night, at this point it's clear they're being tracked because a branch is broken. Undeterred, they press on.

They eventually get through to their destination, a hill overlooking a lake. Except it turns out there is no lake where they were going. This asshole didn't know where the fuck he was going, he hadn't been to these particular woods since he was in high school. He's at least 30, I think the actor was 40 when he filmed it. They're completely lost with few resources.

His girlfriend goes for her phone to call for help, it turns out he'd stolen her phone from her bag because he didn't want her checking it on the trip. He says it probably wouldn't have got signal anyway. Does he have an alternative means of getting help? No, of course he doesn't.

At this point his girlfriend, who has previously been defending him and very forgiving, goes off on him, giving him shit about how he always has to show off and he's a fucking loser. I'm cheering her on. When I was watching I thought this was a feminist critique of how men blunder in and infantilise smart women, potentially leading to their deaths. Turns out, no. He says he was going to propose and she apologises to him.

Overnight their tent is probed by a bear while they're asleep. The next morning they wake up and see that some food they left out has been ravaged, obviously by a bear. This motherfucker still lies and says it was a raccoon, claiming he saw it the previous night.

He eventually apologises for getting them lost that evening, which she accepts and says she didn't mean any of the things she said. Hmm, well perhaps she's just doing it to keep the peace?

The next day they're in their tent, our genius looks out the tent and sees a bear. His girlfriend - who still has the bear spray attached to her belt loop - asks what's going on, he brushes her off and pretends it's nothing, closes the tent.

Finally, mercifully, the bear comes into the tent and eats the guy. His girlfriend escapes, but she still goes back to within sight of the bear to retrieve the engagement ring, so it seems all the forgiveness before was genuine.

With the main threat to her life out of the way, she only has to worry about an angry bear now. She's back to civilisation in about 10 minutes, meeting the fake Irishman, although she does break her leg on the way.