As I pen these words, I find myself tethered to a world of shadows, a hermit in the darkest corners of life. Four years have passed since I dared venture beyond my own threshold, a self-imposed exile that began long before the world embraced its own solitude. My fear of people, like an affliction, has bound me in a desolate embrace.
A mere month ago, my world lost its last vestige of light. My faithful companion, a mongrel black cat, whose life I was entrusted with by a monastery when she was but a kitten, succumbed to cancer's relentless grip. Thirteen years we shared, she and I, and in her absence, the world turned even colder.
Then, as if fate wished to compound my suffering, my wife, with the solemn pronouncement of departure, shattered the remnants of our family. Three children torn from my embrace, their laughter and innocence wrenched away. All assets, as dictated by a prenuptial contract, to be hers. Bitterness wells within me like a never-ending storm.
Three days past, my lifeline, a laptop, ceased to function. Its faithful keys, the conduits of my livelihood, silenced. The words I wove, the lyrics, scripts, and short stories that sustained me, left hanging in the void.
Today, my last tablet of escitalopram found its way to my trembling hand, a bitter reminder that even solace is finite. Anxiety, that relentless tormentor, stands poised to strike. A cruel irony, that my escape from anxiety now invokes its return.
In this country, where the simplest of necessities are elusive dreams, I find myself reaching out to you, dear strangers. An act of desperation, perhaps. An invitation to extend a hand, however light or fleeting. In the vast expanse of the internet, in the dark corners of Reddit, I wonder if there might be a spark of empathy.
If you find it within your hearts to offer support, a lifeline amidst the shadows, I humbly present this QR code, a glimmer of hope in the depths of despair. However, if it's not too much trouble, just let me know that I'm not alone, that you have your own problems too, and that we'll all get through this together. The road ahead is bleak, but perhaps, together, we can illuminate it, if only for a moment.
https://preview.redd.it/my-dearest-strangers-v0-slhe3s02bzpb1.jpg?width=665&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=aa27593301c14cef1803de338bda47705b1a8d9e
With longing, bitterness, and the specter of imminent death as my constant companions, I await your response, if fate deems it so.
Yours,
A Stranger in the Shadows