this is a community like r/AmITheAsshole except unlike that subreddit here you can post interpersonal conflicts, anything that's AITA but is not allowed there even posting about Scar from the lion king and trying to convince redditors that he was not the AH. rules: don't berate others and no pornography we have children here
I (51F) divorced my ex husband ( 53M) 7 years ago. We were married for 14 years and had 3 kids together ( 24M, 22F, 18F).
I was a SAHM and I suffered from constipation that, while doctors say isn't definitely IBS, has made me suffer from joint and back pain when I eat things like dairy or any of my other food sensitivities.
We live in New Jersey and the judge made it so that child support and alimony would both end at the same time.
I had a lot of issues in my marriage, but at the very least, I have three great kids that I love me and who love me. My ex has been very bitter, saying I should have wanted counseling even though I was completely neurotypical and it was him suffering from depression. He also discredited my want to divorce by saying I was acting out of emotion and asked me to take a step back and think, as if I haven't been thinking before.
He was always working 12 hour days and overtime, and I was the one taking care of and giving the kids what they needed. My son now has graduated college and is a genius- he has his own app development company and makes more than my ex and I could ever dream of making in a year.
My 22 year old daughter has a degree in nursing, and is marrying and her fiance comes from money so she's set as well. However, as for me, I've been suffering from menopause and back aches and a lot of the entry level jobs that would hire me would leave me in pain and exhausted. That hasn't stopped my ex from griping and dismissing my real pains.
Long story short, he sent me my last child support and alimony check. In the memo of the alimony check, he wrote " Freedom- good luck then." It was such a mockery to the health issues I've suffered and all I've put in to the family. I showed my friends and they agreed he's still a blunt, daft individual. My 18 yo was there and she said she couldn't believe he thought that way of her.
Then my older kids found out through screenshots, and because of my health issues, my son has been sending me $3k a month while my ex sends me $2.5k plus what's needed for our youngest daughter. He spent a lot of his childhood with unmarried parents and resents the fact my ex proposed to his girlfriend (48F) after only 2 years. He called his dad a bastard and said he and my 22 yo would always help me out. He had been saying he would just make up what I'd lose from my ex because he could afford $5.5k, but he told me my ex had been telling him to save his money and only send me under $2k.
My ex is now backtracking and saying he only wrote it on " my" check, but the kids are not amused. He invited them to his wedding but my 22 yo said she might be better off just focusing on her own wedding, and that she'd help me out too if I needed it. AITA for blasting him when he clearly wrote it to be seen?
He's always painted me as the greedy ex, it seems.