Hi all, throwaway because both she and I lurk Reddit. I (23m) have been with C (23f) for 4 years. We got together during our freshmen year of college. We became very close and we both held similar beliefs and wanted similar things out of life. We moved in with each other and grew really close, almost inseparable, during the pandemic. I wanted to marry this woman, until last night.

C has been under more stress from work and family during the last few months, her dad has cancer and it hasn’t been easy on her. She’s been drinking more and more, and while I don’t mind her drinking, it’s how she gets when she’s drunk is where I begin to have issues. She has a tendency to get pretty mean and say some awful things, talking about my appearance or how small my “member” is, she makes me feel like I’m not enough for her sexually or emotionally. She is almost always apologetic the next morning, and will spend the next few days after that trying to fix things but will turn around and do it again when she drinks.

It really came to a head last night when I took her and her friend out to a local bar that’s popular. I volunteered to be their DD for the night, she’s driven drunk before and I didn’t want her to make that choice again. I told her that I didn’t want her to drink too much tonight, and she agreed that she wouldn’t. The bar was packed when we got there, so we all went and sat at the bar and ordered some food and drinks. They were enjoying themselves and I watched the game while they drank and enjoyed themselves. I got up and went to the bathroom and when I came back, I noticed my girlfriend was getting loud and her friend screamed “cock sleeve” while laughing. She then said, as I walked up and was in earshot, that her ex was the biggest she had and she missed it. I pretended not to hear it, because I knew she was getting drunk. I touched her back and sat down at the bar again, before the guy sitting at the table grabs both our attention and asks us if I was the cock sleeve guy, and I immediately felt like I was gonna be sick. These guys are laughing at me and I asked C if she was serious, she kept laughing. So I just grabbed my keys and walked out, I left both her and her friend there at the bar and I drove home.

I immediately packed up my essential stuff and I went to stay with a close friend for a few days. I didn’t get any texts from C until about an hour after I left them there, asking where I was. I then got a bunch of missed calls and texts that weren’t anything but angry. I answered one call and she was still slurring her words and I heard she was in the bar still, so I hung up and turned off my ringer. I woke up to a stream of apology texts and more missed phone calls, she apologized and said she fucked up and was wondering when I was coming home, that I satisfy her and that I’m more than enough for her, that she’ll make this right if I come home.

I’m just done, I feel humiliated and embarrassed. Her and I had what I thought was a good sexual relationship, we did foreplay and used toys, but I’ve never once not gone out of my way to pleasure her or get her off, I’m not the biggest guy down there so, yeah, I use a sleeve to help her get off too. I just didn’t think she would use that against me like that. I don’t want to go back home, I love her but I feel really humiliated and like she doesn’t respect me as a man or partner. WIBTA if I broke up with her over this? She’s been a perfect partner, otherwise. I just feel like she didn’t respect me at all, and after what she said about her ex, I can’t help but suspect things.

Edit 1: I’m going to text C back and tell her that I’ll be there tomorrow to talk and get the rest of my things. My supportive friend said I don’t have to worry about a place to stay for right now, she’s always been one of my closest friends, so it feels good to have some support right now. Thank you everyone for your advice, I plan on ending things with C. My friend and her brother are going to go as well to make sure things don’t go crazy, I don’t know what C might do at this point.