this is a community like r/AmITheAsshole except unlike that subreddit here you can post interpersonal conflicts, anything that's AITA but is not allowed there even posting about Scar from the lion king and trying to convince redditors that he was not the AH. rules: don't berate others and no pornography we have children here
I've been having ongoing discussions with my own parents (60s, M and F) about my parenting style. For important background, we (me 35F, husband 40M, and our two year old child) live abroad and we're on a long-term visit to stay with our US family this summer. This is the first time our child has been to the USA as he was born abroad.
Among other reasonable requests, I've asked that they be careful what they discuss in front of our child. For example, "Please don't discuss that court case in front of our child, he doesn't understand what jury duty means and the case is upsetting" or "Please stop talking about the cat killing baby bunnies in the backyard."
It's not that we want to hide things from our child. We wnt to be able to approach these topics in an age appropriate and honest way, at a time when it's good to approach them.
Today at lunch my mom began to tell a story about my dad pretending to be the Easter Bunny on the phone for their friends when i was a young child. This story would be fine for a conversation involving only adults, but she did this in front of our son who was at the table. When I said, "Hey, are you telling tht story in front of our child? Please don't!" Everyone at the table got upset. My mom then said "Bye, see you all later" and left for the day. She didn't apologize directly, either. It was her usual, "I'm sorry but you...(insert how I brought this on myself here)."
I feel like I've made a reasonable request that my parents think before they speak, especially when it could ruin a part of childhood that we as parents haven't yet decided how to handle. We might do the Easter Bunny, or not. But I want me and my husband to be able to make the call about when and how we discuss the truth with our child, not through a careless reveal at the lunch table.
AITAH?