Invented By Trendy Young People in the 60s
Pocahontas, no! That’s how you catch the AIDS! Now you have pregnant herpes! #Howconservativesthinksexworks
Janice Shaw Grouch, American Cryogenics Resurectees:
Exposing the Myths of Recreational Sex
Okay, lay it to me straight readers*.
You all just made up this “sex” thing to confuse us asexuals, didn’t you? I mean, sure, you have all this so-called “porn” on the internet, you all talk about it amongst yourselves, and you’ve bribed the greedy bankrollers in Big Biology to make it seem like the primary form of reproduction and recreation amongst a huge swath of the Animalia Kingdom.
But tell it to me straight. When all us asexuals walk out of the room, you just devolve into giant peals of laughter about how gullible we are, right? Yeah?
Shorter (or the last port before Jungle):
- Oh lawdy, lawd! Sex? For fun? Oh you kids are inventing new and more exciting ways to be heathen little sinners aren’t you?
Oh wait, I’m sorry, I seem to have gotten asexual mixed with the current beneficiaries of American Thinker’s plantation cryogenic reanimation project, giving us bizarre time travelers who somehow mistook Fry and Laurie sketches** for How to manuals.
Cause, see, even us poor benighted asexuals, with our complete inability to be sexually attracted to other people still have FUCKING EYES and thus are able to be aware of the simple reality that A) People fuck! B) For fun! and C) It’s been happening for a wee bit longer than the last decade or so.
Oi, it’s rather amazing how the latest pack of wingnuts have really abandoned their dog whistles and straight up laying out their issues with the sexual revolution and why they try and tie every slightly youthful movement back to the dirty hippies they see as emblematic of that.
And that issue is simply that the sexual revolution put a nice fat stake in the heart of the culture of silence that pervaded around social conversations around sex. The way religious authorities and conservatives could make normal for 99% of the population things like “being sexually attracted to other people” and “wanting to fuck them” or even “actually fucking them, even though you aren’t married yet” into seemingly rare taboo things that you were a bad person for even thinking about.
Once we really got it out into the open. When sex advice for couples became so mainstream that even Rapturist Evangelicals were pushing it. Once it became impossible to delude ourselves on just how kinky and slutty mankind has been for its long history, it really fucked with the biggest rumble of them all. That is making something natural in 99% of people into something evil and thus needing advice and absolution from an authority.
And you can see the conservatives hopping mad about it and it’s becoming more and more obvious with the way that the war against women’s health has morphed almost entirely into trying to trick women into getting pregnant, trying to force people into loveless marriages long before they are ready, and straight up pretending that people having sex as teenagers and college students is somehow a new dangerous fad that’s going to destroy the world.
All in the hope that it will rewind the clock and make the lie at all believable in the age of porn and sex advice columnists***.
But hey, just because it’s a train wreck doesn’t mean we can’t bring our packet of marshmallows as we watch this fucker self-immolate.
There is a mountain of media out there promoting a phony philosophy about the joys of recreational sex
… yes, I’m sure 99% of the population totally needs the media to tell them the secret news that “sex feels good”. What? You can have sex for reasons other than the designated mating season designed for only procreation as envisioned by our perfect God? What spore of Satanic madness is this?!? Who’ll protect the children?
– casual, risky sexual encounters
Hey, you know, there are this whole swath of objects out there, known as contraceptives that can block the vast majority of things and make sex safer than it has ever been in our long history as a species. Condoms, dental dams, gloves, routine testing, female condoms, etc… You may have heard of them. They were especially promoted by feminist and queer activists after the big AIDS scare-
Wait, why am I telling you all this? You’re clearly a big fan who cares deeply about safe sex and preventing disease seeing as how this is literally your first reaction to the notion that people fuck and-
What’s that? The conservative movement has been trying to block access to most forms of safe sex in the hopes that denialism and fear will somehow overwrite biology and make horny teenagers stop doing it… Or, shall we be honest and note that the real point is just recreating the notion that STDs and pregnancy should be a sign of shame so that those who got away with it can feel smugly superior over those who got caught (and thus are doomed to die)?
Oh. Well, in that case, fuckevous du!
that do not involve commitment.
Wha?!? Young people having sexual relationships without necessarily intending a long-term relationship? What brand new and totally unprecedented spore of madness is this? Let all of our papers come together as one to tut-tut the young sluts on the terrible evil of the “hookup culture”.
You know what makes this recycled bit of youth panic extra hilarious? We have access to media that pretty much shows that every generation since the 1950s has had the older people freaking out about the youth having sex without it being about forever and babies. So… we’re kind of running out of generations where the assholes selling this shit have direct experience being criticized for the exact same thing.
One need look no farther than the junk advice featured in magazines like Cosmopolitan to see just how pernicious and pervasive recreational sex is.
…
You win.
I’m sorry, but there’s no way I can add to the inherit comedic gold that this sentence represents all on its own. To add any commentary is to simply detract from its perfection. Kudos, wingnut, kudos.
The time for some straight talk
PENIS.
about this sexual trend is long overdue.
Yeah, about 11-14 years after homo sapiens first speciated overdue.
Every young person needs to know the following three truths:
Society will do its best to rip you apart and break you down and you’ll need to fight for your basic dignity. At this point conservative society won’t rest until all of you are dead. And… I’m going to go with… Make friends with a rich person because literally nothing else you do will land you that job that doesn’t make you want to shoot yourself for not enough money to live for the third one.
Did I guess right? And if so, what did I win?
Truth #1: Recreational sex has produced dramatic increases in sexually transmitted diseases (STDs).
Um… I think you’re about 30 years late on that warning, Cassandra. We already had the major AIDS scare. The wealth of research (only possible by the sexual revolutions success in making public discussion of sexuality and sexual health a more normal and accepted thing) into the causes of STDs and how to prevent them. We already had queer communities leading the march to do widespread sex education of our youths and to make safe sex a watchword in at least their own communities and those of today’s youth. And we have brave organizations like Planned Parenthood being protested and demonized because they work to try and make some level of contraceptive access and STD testing
available for all.
In short, we’ve done a lot to stop the spread of STDs and make sex a lot safer. There’s still a lot of work to be done. There’s a number of religious communities (you know, the one’s that are more conservative) that try and demonize safe sex and thus have proliferation of STDs and massive increases in unwanted pregnancies. And there’s all the fallout from the disastrous Abstinence-only education where a bunch of fucks like you demonized condoms and told kids that never having sex was the only way to stay safe. Also all the ways you’ve tried to undermine contraceptive access and sex education at every turn. In fact, I’m having a hard time imagining anyone to be less credible right now giving a lecture on safe sex.
… The pope, maybe?
Girls who are sexually active in their early teens are twice as likely to get an STD, and about 40% will become pregnant. According to Dr. Meg Meeker, a pediatrician and author, “[a]lmost half of all girls are likely to become infected with an STD during their very first sexual experience.” Girls are far more susceptible to STDs than guys because of the biology of the cervix. And a report, The Cost of Free Love, from Concerned Women for America (CWA) documents the fact that there are now some 49 different STDS.
There is no escaping the fact that we are in the midst of an STD epidemic, with more than 20 million new STD cases every year – the majority of them affecting 15-25 year olds, and triple the number just 6 years ago. These inconvenient facts go unreported, and supposedly responsible adults still encourage early sexual activity for girls.
Oh hey, speaking of abstinence-only education and the pack of bullshit lies that come with it… we have this pack of bullshit fresh and tasty.
I almost half to laugh at just stupid they think we are.
I mean, from the idea that society in any way treats the sexuality of girls like they do the sexuality of boys to the crap about 50% of girls (because like boys having sex is like… normal, so we don’t actually give a shit about stopping that. Basically, we just want sex to be boys raping girls who fail to defend their flower and then everyone getting off on slut-shaming the girl when she ends up pregnant or with some other sign of being “defiled”) getting an STD on the first sexual encounter even though most people’s first encounters are with people as young and inexperienced as you at the time.
But I think my favorite is the complete dodge of responsibility of credit for their success. What? Kids are doing risky shit instead of being safer with contraceptives and other safe sex tools? Gosh, I’m sure that has absolutely nothing to do with us deliberately selling them a pack of lies and undermining all efforts to deliver real sex education.
Also… has this lady ever had sex before? Like… ever? Cause, this shit has the stink of a middle-school conversation on what sex positions mean (and like doggy style means you bring in a dog to fuck her and then she like gets AIDS and shit).
Fuck, I had more of an awareness of the reality of the sexual world around me as an asexual seventh-grade kid raised by an Evangelical-influenced school system and parents hesitant to have “the talk” than this lady. And back then, I was searching the entirety of the internet’s porn in the hopes of finding the one thing I was attracted to (because clearly I must be turned on by something, right?).
Truth #2: Recreational sex leaves young people alone and lonely.
Oh joy, it’s this argument. You know the one. “If you let a boy near your puzzle box, you’ll end up a crazy cat lady, alone and miserable because men only care about despoiling virgins on their wedding night”.
Because losing the terrorism of enforced virginity for women (with punishments of economic destruction and probable death for those who got caught) is something that conservatives lament about as much as the end of Feudalism.
Conventional wisdom says that if you tell a lie often enough, people will begin to believe it.
And conservaties have gone all in on that being true, because they are officially out of any other strategy other than slowly accepting that maybe the 20th century did happen.
The mantra, heard from middle school onward, is that sex is great recreation, that it’s free and fun. Sadly, many girls don’t recognize the lie until it’s too late.
Women not enjoying sex is clearly biological. That’s why we have to work so hard to enforce it.
… You know what’s extra hilarious? So, some asexual women have gone to their pastors. You know the ones from which all this “girls should never enjoy sex, wanting sex as a girl is the devil” shit comes from? And they’ve told their pastor the “good news” about how they are asexual and thus don’t need to worry about all that lust business. And it wasn’t even a picosecond before the pastor pulled a full 180 and started talking about God’s divine command to be fruitful and multiply.
Point of this story being that there is no greater opponent of marriage than those who whine the loudest about protecting “traditional marriage” (because the “tradition” is basically girls as house slaves who are repeatedly raped by men who do not respect them for “letting” them rape them).
l activity in your early teens, and you’re likely to have more than a dozen partners
Wow, more than a dozen, huh?
Do… do you think that’s a lot of partners? Like an exceptionally large amount that only a total slut bag could be with? That’s… almost cute, really.
I mean, it’s clear you’re not just including people you have actual long-term relationships but rather every bit of fluke date and short-term fling.
Fuck, I’m a massive introvert asexual and I’ve still had three girlfriends in my life (two of which I’m still with). I guarantee the average is a wee bit higher than that.
But hey, why not reveal just how out of touch you are before you try and get down with the kids, yo.
(four times higher than those who begin sexual activity in their early twenties).
Pfft. Yeah, uh huh, people who only begin to fuck in their 20s totally only have ever had 3 romantic and/or sexual partners in their life. Mmm hmm. Fuck, I bet you could get a decently sized proportion to cop to having had 3 sexual partners in one go, much less in one’s life.
But hey, why let your complete ignorance about sex and sexuality prevent you from trying to pretend to be an expert?
A college coed,
As the whiny MRAs screech about on a daily basis, women are currently the majority of college students.
Thus, anyone still clinging to “coed” as if women being on campus was a rare thing all about trying to snag a rich husband really does belong in a museum as a real life history exhibit.
talking about her new boyfriend, explained that she would “tell him about two guys I slept with, but not the others.” She added, “Once you get beyond five, it sounds kind of slutty.”
Yeah. That’s the shitty thing about our society. Things are slowly improving, but there’s still a deep amount of sexism and there’s still it’s lingering effects in the form of no-win situations and double-standards for women. You know the shit, “a man who sleeps around is a stud. A woman who sleeps around is a slut”. Yeah, that crap.
But it is improving. A lot of men who cling to this kind of mentality where they are owed a partner who is too ignorant of sex to be aware that the douchebag is a bad partner are finding themselves out of luck. And increases in alternate relationship structures and the normalcy of later marriages has allowed a lot more flexibility in figuring oneself out in a way that leaves a lot of douchebags out in the cold feeling bitter and ranting about ‘dem bitches in conservative forums and gaming websites.
Things like Slutwalk and more importantly, all the conservative falling over themselves to reveal that all the nonsense about “sluts” is really about all women everywhere, even the ones in long-term relationships with their first and only boyfriend, are pushing that change and hopefully robbing concepts like “numbers of previous partners” into the dustbin of history where they belong****.
School and college counselors tell us that sexually active girls are three times more likely to be depressed than their abstinent peers. Among the boys, sexually active ones are depressed twice as often. Sexually active teens are more likely than their abstinent counterparts to attempt suicide (girls 15 percent to five percent and boys six percent to one percent). But the most telling fact is that the majority of teenagers, 72 percent of the girls and 55 percent of the boys, acknowledge regret over early sexual activity and wish that they had waited longer to have sex. So much for the cultural mantra that sex is no big deal!
Okay, first we have the little tiny fact that this shit couldn’t be more bullshit if it was a rapist abstinence only clown chewing a wad of gum and saying vaginas work like that.
But beyond that, we get yet another case of conservatives taking suicide (you know, that tragic loss of human life caused by depression, oppression, and stress) and trying to co-opt its horror to terrorize people into lying through their teeth and pretending the world works the way conservatives want to pretend it does.
No gosh, sir, Mr. Conservative, sir, we never, not ever have sex. And we’re not at all gay. And we never ever have a dark moment alone with ourselves in front of the mirror and realize that society pulled a cruel trick on us in assigning us this gender. And we’re never sad or angry at being treated like lepers for being young. We’re all the happy little Beavers from the TV shows you watched as a kid and have been your stand-in for how you think kids acted “back in your day”.
So just rest easy, while we continue to twist our lives into a grotesque parody of internalized shame over our sadness so you can keep on pretending the world isn’t*****.
Truth #3: Recreational sex makes girls the losers.
Oh hey, awesome, thanks for that demonstration of exactly why so many conservatives seem incapable of grasping the notion of consent.
And it’s that. The idea that sex is a “game” with winners and losers.
Blame it on all-holy capitalism and the way that den of winner-takes-all bullshit has infected all manner of human interactions. The way that a set category of assholes have reduced themselves into viewing every interaction with another human being, every friendship, every love, every sexual encounter as a competition where someone gets ahead and someone goes home crying and forgets that we are a species built on mutualism and the parasite box of the Prisoner’s Dilemma is an unsustainable mess.
But the end result is a world where sadly, a number of terrifying assholes view sex through this lens where men “win” sex by tricking, cajoling, or outsmarting their “opponent” (women) and gain their reward (sex) at the other’s expense.
I.e. Rape.
I.e. Making rape a stand-in for all sex in the exact fulfillment of what idiotic anti-feminists believe Andrea Dworkin was trying to say.
And it needs to stop, because sex is a beautiful thing, a great mutual chance for pleasure and bonding. And to have that be poisoned so and at such great expense to us all is a god damned abomination.
The bottom line is that only one third of girls who had early sexual activity describe themselves as “happy” as compared with over half among those who waited. More than a quarter of sexually active girls report depression, and they are three times more likely to commit suicide. As Dr. Miriam Grossman warns in her book, Unprotected, women are hardwired to attach through sexual behavior, and no condom will protect them from the psychological consequences of sexual permissiveness: empty relationships, feelings of self-contempt and worthlessness, and even depression.
A major contributor to today’s promiscuous culture is the unlevel playing field – 57% of students in college are women. In her Weekly Standard article about this situation, Charlotte Allen explained that the sexual revolution was supposed to do away with the double standard, but there is a harsher, more cruel double standard now – a supply-saturated, short-term sexual marketplace. Students at Yale University have a sad term for it now – SWUG-Nation, with “SWUG” standing for “Senior Washed Up Girls.”
The harsh realities of casual, drunken sex should make the choice of abstinence very simple. If there were more honest discussion of the pain caused by promiscuity, the market value of virginity would dramatically increase.
Oh wow, look at all the bullshit and all the standard bugaboo liars quoted.
Fuck it. I’m too tired of this recycled horseshit to give it the dignity of a final bullet as it chokes on the blood in its lungs. A clean death is a kindness I’ll not afford to this virginity-fetishist bullshit.
As is apparently news to ignorant conservatives, 99% of women want sex. Like sex when it is with respectful partners who don’t push against boundaries and treat sex as something to share. They have sex drives and dirty filthy fantasies that are as weird and freaky as anything a man might have.
It’s not a good that women are, that men acquire through economic bullshit.
And for the record, the types of assholes who pretend that sexual marketplace values are a real thing don’t get laid. Ever.
True story.
Young people need to choose carefully. Sex can never be free; choices always have consequences.
You can tell just how pissed off they are that the AIDS scare lost its ability to be a giant terror-beacon for Team Hide in Your Closet Alone and Scared the Penises Will Get You, can’t you?
I mean, here they had this thing they could exploit that was killing people who were “bad” in conservatives’ eyes for doing things like get caught fucking in unapproved ways or doing drugs or being black and/or gay and/or trans*.
And then, the world responded like a real world and crafted drugs to help and methods of preventing disease while still enjoying sex or drugs and now here are all these blood-thirsty conservatives with blue-balls and an angry purple inch ready to pop having to hop suddenly into the cold shower.
It’s just no fair.
We cannot expect young people to act responsibly when neither adults nor the culture is providing the best possible information to encourage self-discipline and self-control, which are the surest keys to young people’s long-term well-being.
There is no power in the verse strong enough to prevent 99% of teenagers having libidos.
So it is high time we discarded the terrified idiots to the dustbin where they belong and actually address the reality of the world and sex.
The era of control through denial is up. Religions that required that crutch to limp forward will have to adapt and rely on their inherent appeal and excellent record upholding children’s health and safety and their own moral code…
Yeah, I see why they are so desperate to cling to this fantasy too******.
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. Inserting sneaky asexual propaganda into posts to secretly turn your kids gay is invented by THE HOMOSEXUAL AGENDA!!!! DUN DUN DUN! We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
*Ha, PENIS.
**Specifically this sketch:
***By asexual law, whenever anyone mentions sex advice columnists of any kind, all asexuals must devote at least five seconds to silently cursing the name of Dan Savage for the myriad of bullshit he has said about asexuals and how to treat them over the years. And… done.
****I mean, why would anyone who is a sexual who gave a damn about good mutual sex view a “high hit count” as it were as anything approaching a bad thing? I mean, more previous partners means it’s more likely they know what they want and don’t want, which means less fumbling and guesswork and more just going in and having fun. It also means more confidence and often more skill which probably feels great if you’re a sexual. I mean, practice makes perfect. It also probably means that they are more likely to be a sensitive lover. What’s there to hate about any of this?
Oh right, endemic sexism which pretends that STD tests don’t exist and that vaginas magically lose their ability to hold a penis after the first guy breaks the “freshness seal”, because if you treat women like disposable consumer goods, that apparently means they are exactly like disposable consumer goods or something. Fuck, sexists really go out of their way to try and ruin something as intuitively awesome to a large part of the population as sex, don’t they?
I mean, based on my girlfriend and partner’s noises when I do stuff, it seems to be a really fucking awesome thing for you sexuals.
*****Yeah, I’ll admit that the suicide appropriation stuff gets under my skin a bit. As long-time readers know, I’ve struggled with depression and currently am struggling with the side effects of the first drug attempt to treat it (basically, it was hell in a bottle and made shit so much worse, I have high hopes the second will go better). I’ve had my share of suicidal ideation. When I was younger, I got way closer to an attempt than I’d like more than once. In the trans* community alone, a full 1/3 of my fellow siblings have been stolen by suicide.
So having the type of fuckers who’ve spent so much time demonizing mental health resources, driving bullying campaigns, and demanding people force themselves into boxes they can’t hope to fulfill co-opt that in the hopes that lying about it’ll make their little “sex is bad” jihad sell better is one of those things that opens the endless hole of rage a bit more than usual (ha, I kid, the bottomless hole of rage opens at the slightest drop of a hat. HOW DARE YOU DROP THAT HAT WHEN I’M TALKING TO YOU. RAAAARRRRRRGGGHHHH!).
******I’ll resist my internal snarky atheism and just instead note that non-shitty religions seem to do just fine without having to exploit the fallacy of sunk costs to create an authoritarian structure of control.
Given that my grandmother’s aunt had an illegitimate child sometime before 1900 and she had an older brother, also born before 1900, of an unnamed father, I am rather skeptical that we invented sex before marriage in the 1960s, though we certainly enjoyed it. There is also the abundance of folks whose surname begins with “Fitz”.
Sort of makes you wonder how Strom Thurmond managed to father a child out of wedlock way back before those darn hippies invented extramarital sex.
Furst.
the market value of virginity
Wow. Just wow. Could any phrase be more indicative of how distorted their views are?
Oh fudge. Curse all the people with faster fingers! (Is there some euphemism going on there?)
angry purple inch
Cerb always has terrific band names in her posts. If it wasn’t Final Four tonight, I might have embarked on another SadlyFest…
Cerb: Image of sketch dint show on my screen. Btw, another excellent post, and sure to draw lots of commentary…and 99% of us are sexual beings.
If nobody enjoyed sex before the hippies popularized the idea – why did men patronize houses of prostitution prior to 1960? What about all the things the Romans were involved in?
Besides, I thought that prostitution was the “oldest profession.” Were there no professions prior to the 1960s? Or is time travel involved somehow?
Given that my grandmother’s aunt had an illegitimate child sometime before 1900 and she had an older brother, also born before 1900, of an unnamed father, I am rather skeptical that we invented sex before marriage in the 1960s, though we certainly enjoyed it
And that’s why they’re mad. Younguns are actually enjoying it and admitting that they’re doing it. What used to be done with a wink and a nod and a “don’t tell the pastor” (still is, in all too many congregations) is now considered normal and appropriate. You don’t have to hide behind a bullshit facade in order to survive in society.
Whoever said that jealousy was most of the reason hippies were so hated wasn’t wrong.
Cerb, who is that that Pocahontas is always feeling up?
less fumbling and guesswork
Ask a partner what s/he likes … perhaps with a demonstration of tempo and pressure. This is also part of the mutuality of fulfilling and enjoyable sex.
non-shitty religions seem to do just fine
Examples
BBBB: Picking up from last thread… Going south from Albuquerque is pretty low on my list of places I want to see. I think I’m too old and creaky to go traipsing around in Carlsbad…though it would be fun to watch the bats. Guadalupe Mtns are right next door to Carlsbad, of course … but more spectalur mountains are north, most notably the Sangre de Cristos. Big Bend seems attractive … but same problem as Carlsbad: I’m easily tuckered out, and this seems like a part where you must take to the trails to see the best stuff.
Also there’s another ‘planning’ defect with going south. These three places are pretty much in a straight line; so on the return drive, you’re pretty much seeing the same country again. I try to plan in ‘loops’ where the return route (& sights) are different than the outbound drive. I do have a short ‘weekend’ southern trip idea…but on the WEST side of the Rio Grande: to see the radiotelescope Very Large Array and the Mailpais (large volcanic rock field).
Thanx for the suggestions! I’ll certainly bear you enthusiatic recommendations in mind.
Whoever said that jealousy was most of the reason hippies were so hated wasn’t wrong.
Still true today, imo. I think it plays a large role, with wingnut Geezers who are my contemporaries (60+). They missed out on the sex-drugs-and rock n roll of the 60’s and 70’s. They must attack the ‘immorality’ as way to camoflage their remorse for missing out on the fun. And, damn, it WAS fun!
In 1963, I was 16 and in my final year of High School.
The Beatles released their first single.
“Bliss was it in that time to be alive but to be young was very heaven.”
Suezboo:
Annus Mirabilis by Philip Larkin.
“Do you like Larkin?”
“I don’t know, I’ve never larked.”
Suezboo: I was a freshman. I didn’t begin the sweet smoke or tripping until I was a freshman in college. Also didn’t have actual and fer-real intercourse until then either. But I had a good On-Base % in HS. (Murican baseball joke.) (((Okay, don’t you prudish types accuse me of TMI. Not on THIS thread.)))
I imagine there are kids in HS today–certainly in college!–that have been with more partners than I have been with in my whole life; I was fairly monogamous for years with three wimmins (alas not simultaneously).
I also imagine that folks in the 80’s, 90’s, and 00’s were much more practiced at the beginning of their encounters … because of porn on the internets tubes. (Hell, back in the Cretaceous, we dint even have videotape</i)!) The only way of discovery was film in porn movie theaters … and these were tame, mostly missionary and BJs. So we mostly had to discover by experience. I wish I had known more about technique and positions when in my prime! So there was that big defect in the 60’s.
Okay, I’m gonna lit up a bowl and finish watching The Fifth Element You’all have fun! I think sexytimes is a good topic, because everybody can join in. (((I imagine this will also be a particularly awkward topic for the creature … at least if it stays on-topic.)))
—————–
DA: Funneh, including the Larkin joke.
Alzo, before leaving: Hiya Doc! Good to see you in Sadlyville again!
Since I read a lot of history I’ve learned that there was an awful lot of hanky panky going on – well pretty much forever.
Indeed.
~
Recreational sexual activity is a recent invention. Why, the Romans didn’t even have a word for cunnilingus!
BBBB: Picking up from last thread… Going south from Albuquerque is pretty low on my list of places I want to see. I think I’m too old and creaky to go traipsing around in Carlsbad…though it would be fun to watch the bats. Guadalupe Mtns are right next door to Carlsbad, of course … but more spectalur mountains are north, most notably the Sangre de Cristos. Big Bend seems attractive … but same problem as Carlsbad: I’m easily tuckered out, and this seems like a part where you must take to the trails to see the best stuff.
A trip to Carlsbad is like a trip to another planet- there is really nothing on the surface quite like an extensive cave system. There’s a cave not too far from Albany called Howe Caverns that has a nice underwater pond, and visitors take a short boat ride in the cave. Carlsbad is very accessible- an elevator takes you down, and you have comfortable guided tours on walkways. Pity, both times I was there, the Mexican free-tailed bats were south for the winter, so I missed the show.
When I was in Austin, I was there too early for the bats as well. If I recall correctly, when the bats first started roosting underneath the bridge, there was talk of eliminating them, until one guy, uh, went to bat for the bats and started an awareness campaign. I’m googling “Austin Bat Man” but haven’t located the guy’s name yet. Funny how the bats went from being considered a nuisance to being a major tourist attraction, and how one individual was responsible for this shift in perception.
For the record, I’ve always been a big fan of bats, but they drive my co-worker nuts.
How come only women have this Magical Bonding thing when they have sex while men don’t? Wouldn’t it make monogamy easier if both sexes had it? And why do women still seeking out other sexual relationship after getting Bonded to a penis?
Sorry to post so soon again, I’m just thinking about how funny it is that when “50 Shades of Gray” came out the media was like “Women reading porn? Kinky porn? This is amazing!” when the world of fanfiction where that story comes from has tons of porn, really really kinky porn, made by females and rabidly consumed by females and it’s not anything new. When are people going to stop being amazed that females have a sex drive?
I too was a teenager in the sixties and enjoyed a lot of teenage sex until I got married in the seventies and have ever since been totally monogamous with one wife for over forty years.
I am glad that young people today are growing up in a climate that is more accepting of sex, whether hetero- or gay or bi- or multiple partnered, whatever.
Sex is one of the great joys of being a human being, and its just a pity that so many sick puppies have gotten twisted into perverting their natural sex drive towards bogus shit like religion, substance abuse, overeating, bigotry, racism, buying expensive crap that they don’t need, etc etc.
Ps Meant to say that probably 90% of the wingnuts that get mocked at this site have great big unaddressed sexual hangups…
I swear, your first sarcastic passage is totally how I felt when I was younger.
Totally not getting sex totally leaves most media as alien to you ^-^;
I bet most of those who have sex first after 20 are generally asexual or celibate anyhow, so… It’s really no surprise they have less partners.
It’s like saying someone who likes ice cream is more likely to have ice cream before dinner, and also will try more flavors. Like duh.
PPS: I was allergic to fluoxetine. It sucked. It gets better ^-^ There are several different paths and they don’t work for everyone.
I also have this crazy idea that you might be able to map out the receptors in the brain by using various reference psychedelic drugs, since each attach to different receptors at different rates. Class the effect types, duration, and onset as well as watching which create negative or nonexistent effects – and you could probably type out the brain chemistry and match it up with cures for mood disorders much more easily.
Of course, people with incipient psychiatric disorders react negatively to such testing, but we give out medicines that a similar number of people are allergic to without knowing if they are or aren’t, so…
I bet most of those who have sex first after 20 are generally asexual or celibate anyhow
Some of us just couldn’t get laid in a women’s prison with a fist-full of free pardons.
MEGO.
Andrew Sullivan, Hypocrite:
http://driftglass.blogspot.com/2014/04/the-wingnut-circle-is-now-complete.html
“Girls who are sexually active in their early teens are twice as likely to get an STD, and about 40% will become pregnant.”
Is it supposed to be some kind of revelation that teenage girls who have sex are more likely to get STDs and get pregnant than those who don’t? I mean, isn’t that kind of too obviously axiomatic, even for a wingnut columnist? I can sorta understand a doctor saying this, in some contexts, but what is the point of repeating it in a political article?
“Truth #2: Recreational sex leaves young people alone and lonely.”
Hmmm. As I seem to recall, young people who had never had sex certainly seemed more lonely than those who had. And more of them seemed to be alone more of the time than young people who were having sex. And while having sex at a young age is not necessarily without its down sides, I think being alone and lonely are not among them. It is perhaps true that “recreational sex” (not quite sure how that is defined…is it all extramarital sex? is it sex with anyone but an “official” BF or GF? is it all non procreative sex?) does not necessarily lead to a longterm relationship, it is also true that abstinence does not necessarily do so either.
I really don’t get it. Sex is part of life. Why do we make such a bunch of hypocritical non sense over it? The overwhelming majority of folks don’t “wait” until marriage or even until engagement. Many, many folks don’t wait until the “age of consent,” which varies widely. Sex is not without consequences, physical, emotional, psychological, but then life is like that. The notion that, somehow, NOT “growing up” with respect to this one aspect of adolescence, coming of age, etc is good thing, plain and simple, is absurd.
I don’t get parents who fight their kids’ natural development every step of the way…at age 13, they are shocked that their kids start to care about boys or girls and their looks and so on. At age 15 they are shocked that boys and girls (or boys and boys or girls and girls) are hanging out together, and starting to do stuff. And at age 16 they are shocked if their kids have “gone all the way,” even though that age is more or less the average age when it happens.
Its as if they had kids, and expected them to stay in that stage, at least in this one regard, forever. I find it creepy. I think people, in general, who gone and on about “kids growing up fast” or “too fast” or “why can’t they stay little longer?” and so on are really creepy. Control freaks. Folks who want someone to dominate and can’t face it when that domination starts to end.
As a kid, I sure did not want to remain one forever. And neither did any other kid I knew. We were all anticipating sex, with some fear and lots of curiosity, but also with unnecessary confusion caused by all this nonsense about “purity” and “virginity” and what God supposedly wanted and so on.
Kids grow up and have sex. And it has always been that way. Deal with it. Stop acting like a bunch of damn children your own selves.
Hey there’s Dr. Dick! We had a question for you but I can’t recall just what it was. Something about Inuit in Alaska maybe?
“Truth #2: Recreational sex leaves
youngpeople alone and lonely.”The adjustment turns it into one of axioms of the slut shamers.
.the whole episode disgusts me
Bell-curve-pimping white supremacist chickenhawk opportunist is disgusted? Oh dear.
Surely “Managed to disgust Andrew Sullivan” is a badge of pride.
Some of us just couldn’t get laid in a women’s prison with a fist-full of free pardons.
They were fine with it at first, but then changed their minds when I explained I would be leaving with them.
The Major may enjoy this photo …. even though the aircraft seperation is awful.
Cool picture.
Here’s what big planes taking off close together actually looks like:
SAC Minimum Interval Takeoff
SNL did a ‘Fox & Friends’ parody. At the end a list of “corrections from last hour” scrolls rapidly up the screen:
Ukraine was not Frasier’s brother on the show “Frasier.”
”Game of Thrones” is not an adult version of musical chairs.
There is no such restaurant as “Ruth’s Chris Christie’s.”
Jackson Browne is only one person.
Malaysia is not the female version of Asia.
Neal deGrasse Tyson does not own a sandwich shop named “Quizmos.”
You can not abbreviate the Supreme Court to spell SCROTUM.
Michelle Obama has never done porn.
Hong Kong is a region in China. Not a video game from Nintendo.
”Vaping” is not having sex with a vacuum cleaner.
Michael Strahan isn’t leaving to go be in “Good Morning Vietnam”
Crimea is not related to Queen Latifah.
Pop Tarts do not cause “splosions.”
Boeing is a company. Not a sound effect.
Pharrell is not a “stylish hand sanitizer.”
Chicklets do not grow up to be roosters.
Chris Christie was never in the show “Three’s Company.”
Infinity pools have a limited amount of water.
Garfunkle is not Garfield’s black cousin.
The Chile Earthquake is not a bold new product from Dairy Queen.
Don Cheadle does not appear if you say “Cheadlejuice” three times.
Joe Biden’s office is only sometimes a’-rockin’.
Lifesavers aren’t medicine.
Captain Phillips is not a brand of rum.
Marvin Gaye liked women.
Nancy Pelosi is a human woman.
God loves figs.
Noah is not “found footage.”
Captain America was never a U.S. President.
The periodic table is not about “lady stuff.”
Major, that video is incredible… I imagine that, if those planes had been flying sorties, somebody would have had a Very Bad Day. The original comment by the poster had me looking up water injection as well. Nice to be sent off on a chase after knowledge.
Major: That’s impressive, putting up four of those big B-52 beasties in less than a minute (by the time index). They seem to have very smoky exhausts. Are they burning coal? [heh] Also doesn’t the smoke / contrail produce a big visual signature, both aloft and from the ground?
What are the typical take-off intervals between large civilian aircraft … say, in a longish queue at busy airport? (((Yet another Fenwickian Question Barrage….)))
They seem to have very smoky exhausts
The poster had a blurb about the dark exhausts being a product of water injection in the turbines- I linked to a wikipedia article in the comment above yours.
They seem to have very smoky exhausts
The B-52G and earlier models had water-injected engines as BBBB noted.
On takeoff roll it would inject water into the intake and turbine sections.
Because the incoming air was now denser it would also inject extra fuel into the combustion chamber.
It gave us about 2500 extra pounds of thrust per engine for as long as the water lasted – around two minutes.
On a 12-second interval takeoff the runway would be almost completely obscured by smoke.
A new book contains what sounds like an objective and comprehensive (600+ pages) account of the Duke lacrosse rape case. Turns out there’s lots and lots of blame to go around, in directions I didn’t even know about.
Takeoff separation between airliners used to be two minutes behind a large jet and 4 minutes behind a “heavy” (more than 300,000 pounds).
They have since changed that and added a “super” weight class for the Airbus A380.
Takeoff separation between airliners
I can’t see wingtip vortices so how could they possibly be a problem?
I too was a teenager in the sixties and enjoyed a lot of teenage sex
I was a teenager in the 70s, and only enjoyed teenage sex in my mind….
Some of us just couldn’t get laid in a women’s prison with a fist-full of free pardons.
TRIGGERING
only enjoyed teenage sex in my mind
Explaining why ZRM’s mind is still a mess of grubby stains and discarded condoms.
Ya, know, zrm, you blew it by not building sexy robots back then. Speaking of robots, how did your sexy robot do in Chicago?
I can’t see wingtip vortices
Trust me, you can feel them. It’s like getting smacked with God’s own crowbar.
The (Packard?) Merlin engine in my dad’s P-51 had water injection.
And some of us spent our teen years out in the country with no socializing privileges. Hard to have a sex life under those conditions.
A friend of mine who used to be a Pentacostalist has this to say about kids and teh sexy:
The (Packard?) Merlin engine in my dad’s P-51 had water injection.
Correct. Packard built Merlin engines in the US under license from Rolls Royce.
Water injection in a jet works in a similar fashion with the added benefit of turning to steam. Kind of a poor-man’s afterburner.
The KC-135A’s were often called “steam jets” for that reason.
This was back in the days when man thought he could burn water.
Cautionary tale- do not, do not google “realm of the mad god”. It will drive you crazy and you will lose hours of your precious time.
You’ve been warned.
BBBB: Just for the halibut (((fish puns anyone?))) and because I’ve always enjoyed route planning, I spent several hours with a New Mexico Atlas [Benchmark; 1:285,000] working out a plausible Carlsbad expedition that runs (pretty much) in a ‘loop route’. Couldn’t easily fit in Guadalupe Mtns or Big Bend….
Gaudalupe Mountains NP is OUT: Basically, the drive is along the southern side of the mountains on US-180 and not much more than that: only three short gravel roads branch to the outer edge of the Guadalupe foothills. Grand scenary, no doubt … but the loop excursion has more dramatic moutain drives across the Sierra Blanca–with nifty-looking switchbacks … and also along the foothils of two other ranges–the Manzanos and the Capitan Mountains. (Fwiw, all three ranges have higher elevation than the Gaudalupes.)
Alas, Big Bend NP is also OUT: It’s at least 450-500 miles from ABQ, and it can’t even be reached by US Highway: About 25% of the journey is over state or county roads. Moreover, it’s basically there-and-back again over the same route, seeing the same landscapes twice over 900-1,000 miles of driving. Also most of the spiffiest BigB sights seem to be accessible only by high-clearance or 4WD dirt roads then foot-trails. Might contemplate,if I was 40 years younger. But, alas, I’m not.
But I HAVE worked out a good plan for a 4-5 day ‘loop’ excursion that includes Carlsbad!. (I need to find out when the bats are present, so I can time the excursion appropriately.) As you sparked off the whole idea with your enthusiam, I will post another content with the bare bones of the route and sights of the Carlsbad Excursion. (I will probably not embark on Carlsbad, until I have finished the Colorado Plateau journeys. Not until 2015 at earliest … and keyed to the presence of the bats. (I also very much enjoy bats! Actually I like most noctural critters, prolly becuase I’m one of them.)
zrm: I understand that the live-band-performance notches in your gunbelt are epic. So I’ll too one out for you, because I know you have a fine grasp of contemporary language
Fenwick, if you do a Carlsbad loop, consider traveling through Hatch on the Rio Grande valley- the town is famous for their chiles.
Yeah, Big Bend is pretty damn tough- the park is bigger than Rhode Island.
The shitbird left another smelly mess….
The one on your head is the only one you’ve got.
From Previous Thread:
Hey Fenwick! Zion and Bryce are amazing, in Zion you have to see the Checkerboard Mesa, and hike in the Virgin Narrows if you get the opportunity. Arches is also really cool. Try to get to the San Luis Valley and Dunes Natl. Park (also a UFO hotspot, but I’m a weirdo…) I think in Chaco there are old pictographs as well!
Also From Previous Thread:
pumps in a lump
I find your ideas intriguing etc. etc. etc.
Yeah, I think he may haz my email, wake him up, some pretty good spots I gots, although I’ve come to the conclusion that walleye are a myth. Bastards.
Topic Of This Post:
Sex. Hmmm.
I’m in favor of it.
Big Bend is a tetch out of the way, but the hot springs are worth it!
Carlsbad – want!
For something is wrong
Or out of place
When a mouse with wings has a human face
Speaking of fishing and zombies…
Crap. John Pinette kicked it.
I heartily recommend a visit to the Carlsbad Caves. I visited them when I was 12 years old, and they are truly astounding.
I subconsciously resist factual information that threatens my defining values.
That is a masterly summation of what our troll is all about.(Although he’s never quite clear about what his defining values are, aside from playing Internet Mall Cop and worring about who gets into the Hot Tub® of Sadly, No! here).
Speaking of fishing and zombies…
Don’t get any ideas, Mr electrician.
Apparently the church lady hasn’t heard about FOUNDING FATHER Tom Jefferson and his slave Sally.
Don’t get any ideas, Mr electrician.
Oh! Wounded am I! Cut to the coccles, indeed!
Besides, swords are so much better…
I’ve gone swordfishing before, but not like that.
I have a rich dream life and excellent recall. (I trained myself using a ‘dream journal’ for years; no longer need it.) Last night’s dream offered an insight into the seemingly incomprehensible contortions wingnutz use to flip 180 degrees so effortlessly.
(((Example: When Shrub was prezniting, the Dick VP famously announced that ‘deficits don’t matter’ … so let’s put the Iraq War costs on the U.S. credit card. Fine-and-dandy said the wingnutz. Yet fter Obama was elected, then deficits immediately–and I mean immediately–became the Number One Most Importantest Thing EVAH!!!)))
So how do they accomplish such a lightning-fast and complete reversal?
Wingnutz are shape-shifters.
I didn’t start until 18, and ended up with only four partners. One girlfriend, one pity from a friend, one bar encounter one-night stand, and then the wife.
Other obvious shape-shifting: “Get gubmint outta our lives! Don’t let gubmint morans take away our freedums! Also don’t touch my Social Security, libs!”
Then, in the next paragraph: “The gubmint must outlaw abortion! And contraception! And ghey marriage!” and on and on and on. How do they accomplish such a contortion?
Shape-shifters.
Odd thought about how religion views sexuality: wouldn’t Buddhists treat asexuality as the ideal state? The basic idea is that unhappiness comes from wanting what you can’t have, so if you don’t want anything you’ll never be disappointed. Specifically, if you don’t want to have sex with a given person anyway, the fact that they don’t find you attractive won’t bother you.
Nah. Cliques. Straight white males who have never even been in an airport bathroom. The Lizard people. Guys who can speak intelligibly about ESPN, and, ummm, ESPN, oh, and FSN. Gobmint must protect their freenessitude.
Now, teh wimmenz who have grinding naughty bits, the rooty-tooty-fruity crowd, those uppity, ummm, what’s the current dog-whistle? There’s a place for all of them – as kitchen help, as airport bathroom attendants, turnip harvesting, etc.
As a society, we are so doomy.
This was back in the days when man thought he could burn water.
Give me a kitchen and stove and I will prove that water can be burned.
Yet fter Obama was elected, then deficits immediately–and I mean immediately–became the Number One Most Importantest Thing EVAH!!!)))
That’s right, and those people on food stamps (NOT the military families, but all the other ones) are the cause of it all. Plus illegals and stuff.
Give me a kitchen and stove and I will prove that water can be burned.
last night i learned that rice can be burned into crispy, charred bits in a microwave…
Yet fter Obama was elected, then deficits immediately–and I mean immediately–became the Number One Most Importantest Thing EVAH!!!)))
What about the insistence on Biblical and Constitutional LITERALISM!!!!!!!
…. except for stupid annoying little phrases like “Do unto others…” “Dont pray like the hypocrites…” “it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle…” “well regulated militia” … “promote the general welfare”…
… which can all be ignored….
Eat & die: Also the Beatitudes. Also 4th, 5th, 6th, 8th, 14th amendments. Also ‘separation clause’ in the 1st. There us so much inconvenient stuff in the Bible and Constitution. Shape-shifters, I say again.
Teh Ho’s minister father said to him – it might have when we threw their golden jubilee – what a shame it was that he would never know the joy of having saved himself for one person and spent a whole lifetime being true. He said “yeah, but you’ll never know the fun of having sex with lots of different people.” After a moment of reflection his father said “Good point.”
I was trying to work up the littul kitton / LOLcat mashup suggested by SC but I can’t find a decent image of the Kennicott bible fighting cats.
I did however luckily stumble across a flying green PENIS monster. So that’s good.
Now, Fenwick, you know the 14th isn’t really … quite like the other amendments. As for things like “separation clause” and “well regulated,” well, that’s just extra phraseology thrown in there to confuse the rubes.
http://www.patheos.com/blogs/wwjtd/2014/04/justin-welby-the-church-of-england-accepting-gay-marriage-will-lead-to-the-mass-murder-of-christians/
Submitted without comment because really, WTF could one possibly say?
1st Amend – Only applies to Money and Larry The Cable Guy, cuz he’s a hoot.
2cd Amend – Handed down from Jesus whilst upon the Giant Blessed Lizard(c).
3rd Amend – Troops shouldn’t be quartered in homes, they should be thousand-dollared by Halliburton in electrified showers.
4th Amend – Fictional, invented by Law and Order – Chippewa Falls Satanic Crimes Squad.
5th Amend – Proof of guilt. Sometimes.
6th Amend – The ‘Eyewash Amendment’. So the sucker thinks he’s getting an even break.
7th Amend – What sort of bitch sues over $20? Have ’em and save the docket space for real money.
8th Amend – What are these multisyllabic words? Yes, cruel is two sylabubs, ‘cuz I said so that’s why.
9th Amend – Nothing in the constilution prevents me from humping a smurf so there.
10th Amend – Jesus had to turn the Giant Blessed Lizard(c) around to drop this one off too.
those uppity, ummm, what’s the current dog-whistle?
I believe it’s “inner city” although “urban” might also work.
Unfortunate surname of the day:
Bienema
Ok, it’s now been cleaned up, but earlier today the shitbird nymjacked me, even with this nym, which I had thought to be pretty much jack-proof…
Therefore, out of consideration for my fellow posters, since I realize this name is somewhat… um… discourteous? I will be returning with the nym “Some guy” from now on…
Just be forewarned that if any future postings by that nym have that “eau de shitbird” redolence, it’s not actually me who left the steamer…
Bienema
no matter how you pronounce it, it sounds fun!
It brings to mind both Pat Smear and Jello Biafra, so it must be pretty punk
Janice’s cats reject your criticism. Your argument is invalid.
i unfriend you…
haha…that was supposed to be from janice’s cats…
I did however luckily stumble across a flying green PENIS monster. So that’s good.
You’re infringing on Smut’s territory here, old chum!
i unfriend you…
THAT’S NOT HOW THIS WORKS.
Answer to all of wimminsz problems.
My search was inspired by Herr Smut hisownself so I figured it’d be okay. Also, I was hoping he’d have a good quality image from the Kennicott bible I was looking for.
Alright, I finally found out the name of my favorite shochu– a shiso-leaf infused variety. Now I need to know if it’s available in the U.S. I am currently nursing a bottle of the stuff that my older brother’s father-in-law sent me.
“We’re talking about sex…SEX. There’s nothing civilized about it.”–Ruth-Anne Miller, Northern Exposure
There’s nothing civilized about it
Feature, not a defect.
a good quality image from the Kennicott bible I was looking for.
Is the digitised version at the Bodleian not rezzy enough?
I rate for Gotmedieval as a source of PENIS. Also discardedimage.
Not the one I had in mind, Herr Doktor. It has cats armed with swords. ‘Sa PITA to rummage through the Bodleian site.
I goggled “kennicott bible cats” and one of my results was this page:
https://www.pinterest.com/jtkoenig/katzenjammers/
BBBB – I’ll be in your neck of the woods Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday this week.
you know the 14th isn’t really … quite like the other amendments
Because it technically isn’t part of the Original Ten in the Bill-O-Rites? The 14th amendment’s due process and equal protection guarantees are key civil-rights elements.(*) For example, the muscle of the 14th first cracked segragation in 1956 (in Brown). Eventually, the 14th brought down the whole ‘legal’ ediface of Jim Crow.
There are some Fenwickian stories about video scripting & training development for the Commission on the Bicentennial of the Constituion, chaired by retired Chief Justice Burger. I had lunch with Burger. Turned out he was a Tolkien fan and had meet the Professor. It was extemely challenging project because the Commission reviewers included Strom Thurmond & Phyllis Schlafly. St. Ronnie appointed the commission, y’unnerstand.
(Technically the client was the Executive Office of the President, because that’s where the Commission was administratively. Nifty, huh?
(*) Indeed, we folded the 14th Amendment into the ‘Bill of Rights’ teaching materials .
BBBB – I’ll be in your neck of the woods Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday this week.
That’s excellent news! I have tomorrow off and don’t have to return to work until 9PM on Wednesday night. What time do you arrive in the NY area?
It’s bugged me for decades that people who are wholly or relatively asexual, or even those who just aren’t having sex for one reason or another, are labeled as bad: repressed, sublimating, losers, etc.
One aspect of this mindset is that older folks become cultural nonentities. I won’t claim to lust after most of them, but mass media gives them less bandwidth than their numbers and vitality demand. The ones with libidos must find this state of affairs frustrating. At sixty-five you could be dead or more alive than a forty-something, or me.
In the prime of my life — perhaps 19-24 — I spent five long years without having sex. I won’t get deep into the reasons. I wasn’t unattractive: I’ve looked better, but looks have never been my weak point. I make this admission because it’s not so simple as being a twisted freak of some sort. I feel that I was made to think that it was that simple, in the hyper-sexualized (but crucially, not like it shoulda been) America of my young adulthood. The environment could’ve been better in numerous ways, among them some/any respect for variance in sexual development, interest, …
BBBB –
I seem to be having trouble responding to your email. I should get in around 6:30 AM. Hopefully I’ll sleep until at least noon. I show for work around 7:00 PM.
You should have my phone # in a previous message, so you can send me a text.
Some folks just need a time machine … or a Poontang Fever vaccine shot.
Ah, another country heard from. Good job, lil’ Billy.
Let’s parse this bullshit a little. Just a bit.
Eich was not fired. He resigned. Under pressure, yes, but he did not have to resign. His money. He made a business decision, or is capitalism now a secular humanist plot too?
The other men? Fired. Michael Sam? You’re saying he won’t be hired. There is a touch of difference between never having had the job, and making a tactical decision, that he did not have to make, to save his cabbage.
Eich responded to consumer pressure. (Let’s face facts, it was the OKCupid decision and the market pressure that forced his hand. He couldn’t give a shit about the employees feelings, else he wouldn’t be rather well off.) Secular capitalism, you know.
The other gentlemen and Michael Sam? Those decisions were made for them, by men with teensy-tiny penii, full of fear, Paxil, Scotch. Oh, and regarding Sam? The players in general don’t give a damn, they want rings and endorsements, neither they nor Michael Sam are looking at the locker room as a prime hookup spot. The fans in general don’t give a damn. They want rings, bragging rights, and to buy DeSean Sanders Washington team jerseys. I give you Ray Lewis, murderer, as example number one – not only did he get a send-off that would make any 35 year line worker, given a plaque and a red velvet cake labeled “Good Luck, Mortimer, See You At Walmart” (I know, big fucking cake, innit), stabby, but now he will be on TV every Sunday.
Gay mafia, Mr. Saletan? Try removing your lips from Mr. Eich’s genitalia, see how long you stay employed, and then try surviving as a Food King bagger.
In conclusion, creepy dude, due, you’re creepy. Go cuddle Falwell’s corpse.
To add on a touch, why do I suspect Willy would not be complaining nearly as much if Eich, having found out his CFO donated to defeat PROP.8, pressured said CFO to resign because hey, his company?
I know, I know, tl:dr.
Sally is still completely full of crap.
The tears that Lord Saletan shed over the fate of Mr Eich is typical of the Slate-pitch genre: Discriminating against bigots is worse than being against gay marriage!
I think all the people who are sorry for Mr Eich should start a petition drive at whitehouse.gov for him to be appointed the CEO of Mozilla again.
Fight the Power!
Way to parse that BS, paleotectonics!
Let’s examine this issue while giving this ex CEO the maximum possible benefit of the doubt. He was and continues to be against gay marriage, from some sort of moral stance that isn’t the depressingly common reflexive bigotry of many of the more reactionary religious people. Imagine that he has an ironclad damn good reason to be against prop 8. If so, it is clearly ineffable and not capable of being reduced to mere prose, because every reason for opposing prop 8 that I have ever encountered in any format, from speech to print, has been utterly unconvincing. Any law specifically intended to strip or deny rights from a group of people automatically demands a higher level of scrutiny than laws that don’t touch those issues, in fact, I would say that that kind of law is should only be considered if lives are immediately at stake.
For instance, in World War II when Japanese Americans were removed to internment camps, that was unjustified, but I understand why people wanted to raise the issue, even if they should have rejected it. As it turns out the eminently reasonable goal of preventing espionage and sabotage during wartime was used by racists and opportunists to isolate Japanese Americans, many of them third generation citizens and steal everything they owned. That law was wrong on its premise “Japanese Americans are disloyal and dangerous” and tragic in its execution.
And since this ex CEO cannot or will not articulate any reason for this opposition without referring to modern interpretations of translations of ancient unverifiable texts of dubious provenance, I think many people are within their rights to consider arguments based interpretations of those texts to be unconvincing, if not completely irrelevant. If his arguments rely on some ineffable revelation of universal truth to which only he is privy, and which resist any reduction to words and sentences, I am sure that as a modern reasonable man of the 21st century, he will understand the skepticism with which the rest of us regard his position.
The funniest thing about the Eich ache is that these same idiots whining about Eich’s treatment at the hands of Mozilla are the same assholes who think that Hobby Lobby should be able to determine how female employees should use their defined benefits.
Freedom- only for wealthy men.
Answer to all of wimminsz problems.
that is possibly the creepiest thing i have evar seen…what is wrong with people?!
The funniest thing about the Eich ache is that these same idiots whining about Eich’s treatment at the hands of Mozilla are the same assholes who think that Hobby Lobby should be able to determine how female employees should use their defined benefits.
and the dissonance beat goes on…
and the dissonance beat goes on…
This is even beyond dissonance. Wait until we hear the wailing and gnashing of teeth when our beloved nation is finally cast into the bottomless pit of equal pay and transparency in pay scales that Karl Marxbama is about to mandate by executive order. It’s already started on Facebook, and my poor girlfriend spent most of her evening excoriating her dumbass ex husband’s relatives last night. She was pretty upset about the boilerplate logic (guy lost argument, says “I’LL BET YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD KEEP YOUR INSURANCE TOO!”.
The general gist of their argument was that women do deserve equal pay, but only if the poor, downtrodden makers of our fine nation decide which of the bitches oughta get said equal pay. They certainly aren’t going to be told by some n***er who stole 2 elections from his headquarters in Kenya who gets paid and who don’t.
It’s not even dissonance. It’s a volatile mixture of stupidity and hatred.
The funniest thing about the Eich ache
Oh, there’s LOTS of funny things about this….
Paleo, Helmut, tsam: I enjoyed reading what you wrote. Thanks for taking the time to write and polish what you wrote. (Writing that smooth seldom emerges in first draft, at least in my experience.)
Outstanding.
Jeeze Louise, talk about the horns of a dilemma!
I mean, it’s a truism that NObody hearts teh T&A like we do … but our clients need the rubes kept psychosexually repressed enough to need the smorgasbord of overpriced anodynes they’re paying us to shill for them.
What’s a multibillion-dollar global corporate industry to do???
#fml
Paleo & BBBB & DA & others who encouraged the Carlsbad Expedition:
I’m proud of the ‘loop’ plan I worked out. It covers what I regard as the chief sights of SE New Mexico. So I’m going to work up a detailed Comment with lotsa links to Purdy Photos so you can imagine the drive’s scenary along with me.
Oh very sly, silly Willy. Yes, customer confidence and all that. False fucking equivalence (I’m sure Silly Willy knows it, the whole thing reeks of rancid weasel).
The carpet guy was a victim of homophobic underlings and a boss that saw getting rid of him as more expedient than telling the underlings to grow the fuck up. Which he should have done because, as you note, being gay isn’t a choice. The peons didn’t like him due to something out of control. You also note that Eich made a choice. Silly Willy, your disingenuity is showing.
Sam? It is to laugh. Paleo already laughed you into oblivion so I’ll move along.
The too femmy guy was the victim of a homophobic boss. Its a good bet that the customers wouldnt give a shit. He was fired because it was the boss’s perception that customers would be uncomfortable. Eich’s case is not one of perception but fact.
Let’s get to the chase: each case you cite involves people enforcing second class citizenship on a class of people. Eich could have been fired for those reasons had he actually been gay. (Not in Cali. but suppose Mozilla was in MI, say). Eich was asked to leave because of what he chose to do, said action also an attempt to enforce second class citizenship. He hasd an opportunity to explain himself, to allay the fears of staff, partners, customers, but he chose to continue his stance that so many of the staff, partners, customers dont deserve equal rights. That’s why he lost the confidence of everyone – he demonstrably makes bad decisions.
I am sure that as a modern reasonable man of the 21st century, he will understand the skepticism with which the rest of us regard his position.
LOL K.
Holy fuck. Here’s looking at green and calling it chicken.
Well, it’s simple, if he is basing his stance on gay marriage on information that is secret, or unsharable, he’d have to be an imbecile to expect that to convince anyone that he holds that position based on reasons that are above reproach, when the most vocal advocates of his position do so out of bigotry fear and hatred.
I’d actually sign this…
…because I want to see an Obama Administration official, say Carney, because he drives teh RWNJ up a wall, up at the podium to say:
“In the matter of the petition to appoint Mr. Eich as head of Mozilla, a private corporation. Ummm. Well. I.
Y’ALL ARE CALLING US SOCIALISTS?!?! Jesus, freaks, at least be consistent!!!!”
(Writing that smooth seldom emerges in first draft, at least in my experience.)
“If I had more time, this letter would be shorter.”
That’s why he lost the confidence of everyone – he demonstrably makes bad decisions.
not that they would ever own up to this…i admit i struggled with the way things went down at mozilla because it did seem to a small extent that he was ‘bullied’ out, but after studying the sitch, he chose to resign, he wasn’t in the least transparent in why he chose to make a donation and in the end, he made a bad decision…a personal decision in his personal capacity, but compounding that decision with not being open and honest about it in his professional capacity…well, that’s not good practice, personally or professionally…
If he’d made this decision as a coder, or even a middle manager, we wouldn’t even be having this conversation, either because he wouldn’t have been fired for that (as long as he wasn’t publicly combining Mozilla snd Prop Hate, that is, and implying that was Mozilla’s public opinion), or because an employee getting fired for wearing loafers on Tuesday instead of Wednesday is Not News.
Also, Pup’s example of not being able to fire an employee for being gay in California, I’ll bet some have, and will. It was patently illegal to fire one of my stepsisters for having cancer (thyroid, she’s fine now), but her employer did anyway. Granted, it was in Texas, that Worker’s Paradise, but still.
So you’ve probably seen the trailer for God’s Not Dead. If you haven’t, watch it. Kevin Sorbo and Dean Cain chew the scenery in a predictable christianist circlejerk. Then there’s Noah, which the christianists assailed for not being historically accurate. Don’t forget the creationist loons balling about not getting equal time on Cosmos. And now, beyond belief, it’s a movie – I shit you not – professing geocentrism. No really!
It’s even got Lawrence Krauss and Michio Kaku! Well, sort of:
http://www.patheos.com/blogs/friendlyatheist/2014/04/08/new-documentary-narrated-by-star-treks-kate-mulgrew-and-with-atheist-interviewees-says-the-sun-circles-the-earth/
Well, it’s simple, if he is basing his stance on gay marriage on information that is secret, or unsharable, he’d have to be an imbecile to expect that to convince anyone that he holds that position based on reasons that are above reproach, when the most vocal advocates of his position do so out of bigotry fear and hatred.
I wasn’t laughing at you. It was a logical conclusion. wingnuts HATE THOSE SO MUCH.
http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/borowitzreport/2014/04/boehner-i-dont-want-to-live-in-a-world-where-seven-million-people-get-affordable-health-care.html?intcid=obnetwork
I would have taken a sincere mea culpa and going on record stating that he felt that way at one time but has come to see the light in the midst of his new digs at Mozilla. I’ll take a “hey, I fucked up and I was wrong” any day.
Hitler learns of Eichs resignation.
I’ll take a “hey, I fucked up and I was wrong” any day.
indeed…or just not being an asshole in the first place…
DA: Very amusing link. My favorite lines:
“I want everybody except Sully, Saleton, Pennis, and Troofie to leave the room.”
“Now I’m the poster child for Bad Judgment 101.”
“He couldn’t even write a sincere apology. I’ve seen better prose on the back of a cereal box.
From the Orange Satan, here’s some amusing news from Texas, of all places.
Now it’s liberals. Or, rather, it’s people on the left who, in their exhilaration at finally wielding corporate power, have forgotten what liberalism is.
Did “people on the left” demand Eich’s resignation? I recall there was (a) a dating site, and (b) his board of directors.
I know, I know… in Saletan’s circles you go to war against the liberal opponents you’d like to have, not against the liberal opponents who actually exist..
I mean,
Lord SummerisleSaletan builds a strawman that size, I worry that he plans to burn Edward Woodward inside it as a pagan sacrificeThanks, Fenwick. I’ve enjoyed the genre of Downfall videos and decided that the Eich matter deserved such a treatment.
Did “people on the left” demand Eich’s resignation? I recall there was (a) a dating site, and (b) his board of directors.
well, also too…you ferget who actually defines all policy in the u.s…boggers and commenters…
I had another rant halfway written about Eich again, but I erased it. I was barking up the wrong tree. If I had to individually condemn every prominent tech industry figure with retrograde ideas on politics or sexism or other bigotry, I wouldn’t have time to get any work done. The real reason to object to Eich isn’t his financial donation to making the lives of gay people worse, it’s his invention of Javascript. Seriously, to hell with him and his misbegotten attempt to recreate the black speech of Mordor in ones and zeros.
Present for Pupienus!
Also for BotB, Rancid Weasel.
Hitler learns of Eichs resignation.
Nice to see Troofy still getting work.
Seriously, to hell with him and his misbegotten attempt to recreate the black speech of Mordor in ones and zeros.
Laughter in Albuquereque. (((Special bonus: puts the punchline at the end)))
Rancid Weasel–aka the guys who practice in Joey’s garage–works for me.
Over 100 Ebola-related deaths in West Africa.
Speaking of Africa, here some specialized maps showing Africa in relation to the rest of the world.
(Also: Hiya Suezboo. I hope things are beginning to work themselves out for you.)
That fucker invented JavaScript? Ffs-WHY? Truly a monster
Very interesting maps, Fenwick.
I’m OK – still shaky and a tad paranoid. I have closed the shop and the place seems very empty without the counters and machines.
indeed…or just not being an asshole in the first place…
True. But not one among us has never been wrong.
MOAR maps! Global religous diversity. Might be of interest to Pup and Sadlies with a similar viewpoint.
(((They did a sneaky thing, though: They use a label of ‘Unaffiliated’, which probably lumps together atheists, agnostics, spiritualists, and miscellaneous, e.g. pagan, wiccan. Nevertheless ‘Unaffiliated’ is the second-largest group in US behing Xians.)))
—————————–
I’m going to watch the Women’s NCAA championship tonight. I like the women’s game more than the men’s: The women’s game rewards good ball-handling–hey! wipe that durty smile offa yer face!–and accurate passing. It seems to women’s game places a premium on finesses,, precision, and agility … without the raw baseline-and-key power-game in men’s BB. I like the men’s game, o’ course … but the women’s game is more fun to watch, imo. (Fwiw, Maryland has a consistently good program; made it to the 2014 Final Four.) Never liked NBA, but could generate minor enthusiasm for WNBA
Great matchup tonight (8:30 EST, ESPN): Something that has never happened before in NCAA basketball: TWO undefeated teams.
Connecticut (39-0, ranked #1) versus Notre Dame (37-0, #2)
Okay one more link. A ‘road’ in the Himalayas. The NTSB would not approve. Stick around for the waterfall …..
Just got back after an afternoon of adventure with Major Kong. We adopted a family of Irish tourists and had a grand time touring my neck of the woods.
If Major Kong didn’t ride a bomb, I call shenanigans.
Did you and major get stopped and frisked?
If Major Kong didn’t ride a bomb, I call shenanigans.
Hey, now, my car’s pretty nice!
Did you and major get stopped and frisked?
No, good thing too, because there are no cute cops in the town we went to.
Hey-a free massage doesn’t require hotness
I dunno, when I was in my early twenties, I knew a cop who was a total sexpot- she could stop conversation just by walking into a room.
I’m very particular about my cop fetishes, thank you very much!
Re: JavaScript
What’s this! UR DOIN’ IT RONG! NO UPDATER! NO ADD-ONS! dev/null/tourney ONLY! FINAL DESTINATION!!!!111eleventy
FOR GLORY
If Major Kong didn’t ride a bomb, I call shenanigans.
Hey, now, my car’s pretty nice!
I hate to admit that I did ride a car once when I was in High School.
I’m probably still grounded for that one.
I thoroughly enjoyed my guided tour of BBBB’s neck of the woods.
I thoroughly enjoyed my guided tour of BBBB’s neck of the woods.
I am not sure I understand this euphemism.
I’m very particular about my cop fetishes, thank you very much!
As you should be.
For BBBB.
Don’t know if there are any other Tool fans here (no, not Saletan, music to maim by), this is totes real, and f’in amazing, and listen to the lil’ chica singing – damn!
Don’t know if there are any other Tool fans here
Yes Tool fan and musician here who has played that song on stage. Fucking IMPRESSIVE
very nice thanks for that what a great rendition of a great song.
D-KW, that was the cute-ation!
To be fair, the guy was a developer, not an executive. By 2008, a lead developer, who lead many teams to produce some very fine code…
…But this was a hard lesson, I guess, that executive positions are political ones. What he does as a developer of any level will never get the shining light that being CEO did.
And yeah, the non-apology pissed off my spouse some.
What also gets me is the ‘$1000 isn’t much’ arguments. That’s 2% the median US family’s income. That’s a starting developers’ week’s wage. WTF are they thinking that it ‘isn’t much’?
In your face h8ers! http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2014/04/09/pro-lgbt-church-turns-tables-by-using-religious-freedom-to-save-gay-boy-scout-leader/
But he’s injecting homosexuality into scouting, Pup! How else would you interpret “rub two sticks together to start a fire”, Pup?
Tool is awesome, and holy shit those kids are amazing!
Here’s the original video — the one you linked is a little glitchy. There’s a link in the comments there to get more music from them.
Boy Scouts are conditioning them to think that camping in the woods with a lot of men is a normal thing.
Here’s the original video — the one you linked is a little glitchy.
Appreciation flows forth, like the breeze of teh buttocks! Thanks, sir,
Also, too: Different kids doing The Number Of The Beast.
\m/Corporate Tax Freedom Day—- Jan. 1, 12:00:00am!
http://www.reuters.com/article/2014/04/09/us-usa-tax-offshore-idUSBREA3729V20140409
From !!!!!!’s link:
Good luck Ron, you’re gonna need it.
Those kids playing 46&2 gives me goose bumps. That’s a tough song to play on guitar and bass–and those kids just fucking kill it. We will be hearing from some of these kids later in life.
But he’s injecting homosexuality into scouting,
As long as he’s not injecting homosexuality into scouts, who cares?
How else would you interpret “rub two sticks together to start a fire”, Pup?
Come on baby light my fire!
But he’s injecting homosexuality into scouting,
Unless there’s a merit badge, I call bullshit.
If there is one, other questions arise: what’s it look like? How is it earned?
If there is one, other questions arise: what’s it look like?
A tasteful boot, being shoved down someone’s throat…forever.
All y’all don’t even pay attention to your own post, you know, s. e. x. . Why can’t you listen to Ted Nugent and Rush Limbaugh, get some real sex ed? Bill O’Reilly’s a good resource, he wrote that book with the windbreaker and the tenagers, Mark Foley had a great outreach program to the kids, and it turned out Strom Thurmond had a, well, black, daughter, who he treated like one of his own at her momma’s house, and that collection of little shoes, prolly for the children of the poor.
Just ’cause all’y’all want to get satinic with yer genitit, genta, umm, uglies, don’t mean I have to have my kid or my momma get exposed to it, or papism, or bread without leaves or all of that other non-american weirdness.
grr. I do IT support work, so I often have to fix issued related to anything that uses electrons in the building. So I’m not upset that someone called me because the phone in the training room had no dial tone, I’m upset because someone put scotch tape over the contacts on one end of the handset cord and plugged it in. As if I’m not behind enough without having to take time to fix some dumb ass practical joke.
We adopted a family of Irish tourists and had a grand time touring my neck of the woods.
those would be the best kind to adopt…glad you two had fun…i’m still trying to lure the major to sioux falls…
Those kids playing 46&2 gives me goose bumps. That’s a tough song to play on guitar and bass–and those kids just fucking kill it. We will be hearing from some of these kids later in life.
there were pretty amazeballs…
i’m still trying to lure the major to sioux falls…
That sounds fishy.
That sounds fishy.
let’s hope he takes the bait…
let’s hope he takes the bait…
Give him some slack, but don’t let ‘im off the hook.
Hell.
Just not the same without the matching gravatar, huh?
Gravatar?
Oh, you mean my selfie?
Well, I guess it’s time to start piscine all over THIS thread…
Take your best shot, shambler, I’m gill standing…
That was kind of crappie, paleo…
So this thread’s gonna get all smelt up with puns too, eh?
bbkf cast the bait. I bet she feels eel about it now.
Not that I’m carping about it or anything.
Reeling from the effects, no doubt.
I’m just gonna perch on the sidelines and watch the mayhem.
hey…i didn’t do it on porpoise! besides, if you think about it, a CERTAIN ZOMBIE started the actual punnage…i was just throwing out a line…
You totally lured him in.
I’m just gonna perch on the sidelines and watch the mayhem.
It’s like watching a sturgeon operate.
And hell, maybe paleo started the whole thing with the Tool video — it had a sick bass line.
bbkf is now just casting asparagus, until she goes bluegill in the face.
I think paleo was being koi.
If she holds her breath too long she’ll seastars.
Probably thought it would fly right past us.
Cod forbid we get more puns in this plaice.
Don’t mako me come back there!
Ok, ok, I’ll scale it back a bit.
Ok, ok, I’ll scale it back a bit.
Good, it was getting creel crazy there.
…a CERTAIN ZOMBIE…
It certainly is strange how often I encounter this phrase. I may have to school myself on ‘net traditions. Wouldn’t want to make anyone crabby.
Cod forbid we get more puns in this plaice.
Suezboo, I am not your anemone.
Why change your tuna now?
Why change your tuna now?
I am trying not to flounder.
Suezboo, I am not your anemone.
Abalone. Quite the gaff there Z.
I have to step away for a minute. Everyone hold your puns tilapia.
what a load of carp!
Abalone. Quite the gaff there Z.
You’re no ray of light, manta. Not gonna let you skate on that one.
Not even for the halibut?
Right, you think we’re a buncha suckers or something?
You risk tetrodotoxin the patience of some suckers when you pun in such a caviar fashion. There is only a small marlin of error when we decide how much is too much.
I was urchin to find a pun for stomatopod. Man, ’tis not a shrimp of a task; nearly reduced me to jellyfish.
Don’t listen to Helmut, it’s just a red herring.
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Z may be the leader.
I am just glad not to be a sinker, paleo.
Just saw Helmut’s, Z is belly up.
Figures. It’s a well-known fact that zombies have no sole.
Hake, as much as I trilobite back, it’s a rigged gamefish.
A man named Helmut surely knows his steelhead.
hubbkf is finally coming home tonight after his stint in vegas…but after reading all these puns, i may have to tell him, ‘not tonight, dear…i have a haddock’
Whale, I may have to get trout of here. Gotta be flying, fish.
Coelacanth you later.
Also, it’s kinda cutthroat to bring mammals into this. You otter not do that.
Also, it’s kinda cutthroat to bring mammals into this. You otter not do that.
Bull.
Have a great bay, Z!
hubbkf is finally coming home tonight after his stint in vegas
His ship came in?
‘not tonight, dear…i have a haddock’
My work here is dun.
This is a dangerous gamefish. It is not moray-ly ambergris. Remora-sless conflict will surely escalate, and it will be impossible to minnowmise casualties in the event of all out Portuguese man-of-war.
From an obituary, re: a man’s decision to abandon butchery and take up art:
“But with time, he began to chafe among the meat.”
There’s no pun there — it’s just oddly phrased
“But with time, he began to chafe among the meat.”
Lube. Always, always, always lots of lube.
Shoulda used some lube.
Dammit paleo!
There’s no pun there — it’s just oddly phrased
A fish out of water.
So to speak.
WHO LET THE PUN SHARK OFF THE CHAIN?
I would sooner write “among the meats” (plural). On the other hand, “fish” would work as well as “fishes.” The man would not “chafe” in my telling.
And a photo caption: “This moon-bathed scene of an abandoned wheezer,…”
“But with time, he began to chafe among the meat.”
is that for real or are you telling fish stories?
great rendition of a great song.
I was only disappointed by one thing: The credit scroll included all the technical people–camera, editing, sound, etc. But did NOT credit the musicians. I call bullhead.
“But with time, he began to chafe among the meat.”
Is that what the kids are calling it these days?
Oh it’s for reel, bbkf.
When you’re make high-6 or 7 or 8 figures, a grand is hardly daily pin money for shiny things. Or so I imagine. Certainly is true for two relatives who are mulit-millionaires.
No mammals. Fish only. Fin-al Destination!
No more cleavers. Paintbrushes only. Final Steak-ination
Oh it’s for reel, bbkf.
i was hoping it was just a fluke…
DeMint tries the old “The Civil War was not about slavery” thing that is a thing among assholes who think we’re all being too hard on poor Southerners”
No Big Government. Free Market only. Final Emancipation!
still trying to lure the major to sioux falls…
Gee, you really DO live in the extreme SW corner. I hope spring has finally reached the North Country. (80 in ABQ at 4 PM).
Fudge! I keep forgetting to contribute something fishy. I’ve been sharking my duties.
Okay, that’s a lotta meme abuse for just a Ninty Direct. I’ll hold off doing any moar until Smash is released. IOW, No Final Destination, real jokes only, FINAL DESTINATION!!!
still trying to lure the major to sioux falls…
I don’t think we actually stay in Sioux Falls any more. I used to like that trip.
Now it’s an “out and back”. The flight goes from Memphis to Sioux Falls and back to Memphis on the same day.
Those are good trips for people that live in Memphis because they get to sleep in their own bed. They’re terrible for commuters like myself.
Cod you guys knock it off with the puns? I know it’s in your bass nature but if your angling to maco this a better place you fail – it’s just increasing the tenchion.
Ahi know it’s a bit of a breach, and I don’t necessarily want to make waves, but don’t you think an argument could be made for classing the GOP as a hake group?
So long as it keeps that blowfish, (the Troll) away. It’s a dirty job but salmon’s gotta do it.
Just don’t get crabby about it.
Geez, Pup. Could you not put *four* fish names into ONE sentence? Leave some for the rest of us, fer Pikes Sake.
Can’t think of a fish pun to go with yet another map,
a gif showing state murders (executions) since 1977. There sure are some bloodthirsty states! Most of them also have voters as dumb as a sack of hammerheads.
Walleye never…
Idiot accidentally shoots himself at NRA rally
http://talkingpointsmemo.com/livewire/accidental-shooting-nra-event
No troll droppings, but theres something fishy about this thread…
In non-fishy news, Moylan’s Hop Craic Quadruple IPA is fucking intense and not for the faint of heart, or palate.
Fucking hop freaks ARE RUINING EVERYTHING. Too much is too much.
New Rule: Fish puns are optional from here on. Cuz why? Because it’s hard for us non-wittty peeples. So if you’ve got the fish-pun chops (BOtB), slip them in for our continued amazement … and stomach upsets for the worst of them.
——————————
I was scrolling through liesurely and it occured to me this thread has some killer BoB names. Like this one from the Major: God’s Own Crowbar Perhaps a lousy Xian metal band? Even better: an Yankovician Xian band parody.
Pup will be happy to know that while I’m more than happy to indulge in hop ridiculousness, I also do subtle. A recently brewed Belgian Wit had nearly no hops and turned out absolutely delightful.
In non-fishy news, Moylan’s Hop Craic Quadruple IPA is fucking intense and not for the faint of heart, or palate.
Good grief … I suspect I can handle the hoppiness, but QUAD? The doubles are strong enough … how frequent are the situations in which I could drink six of these, is what I ask … If we’re talking bitterer than the bitterest IPA I’ve had, why that’s stupid and arguably a misuse of the double, triple, etc. terminology.
The hop(s) are there for reasons … it isn’t a game … by the same token, I am already passing over very tasty IPAs because they’re too fucking strong for daily use, and no, I can’t just drink fewer, if there’s bottles in the house and I enter a certain mindset I’ll drink more.
hops, not hop(s) … dunno where those marks were intended for
New Rule: Fish puns are optional from here on. Cuz why? Because it’s hard for us non-wittty peeples. So if you’ve got the fish-pun chops (BOtB), slip them in for our continued amazement … and stomach upsets for the worst of them.
Sounds like someone needs to get a Jacques Cousteau DVD set! Actually, the Blue Planet TV-series was breathtaking. You should see if you can get it at your local library.
Pupienus said,
Cod you guys knock it off with the puns?
Exit Pupienus. In high gudgeon.
New Rule: Fish puns are optional from here on. Cuz why?
so we don’t scare the Ladyfish. But those who do, be ready to take your lumps, suckers.
But I think it is time to bury the hatchetfish. Let’s not be roughy with the grouper. we can discus this without being pricklefish.
Perhaps we should just have a game of sheepshead.
Exit Pupienus. In high gudgeon.
We will miss the pupfish.
Fucking hop freaks ARE RUINING EVERYTHING
Pupienus Johnson is RIGHT!
Seriously, I like a good IPA as much as anyone, but missus zombie really doesn’t care for it. Let’s not leave her out just for a fashion, mmm’kay?
you guys saury I came back yet?
you guys saury I came back yet?
Are you pushing in the direction of dinosaurs? It’s gonna be rough going–
You’re a stickleback for details.
I was just zomsplaining a little.
You just don’t get enough opportunities to use words like “oceanodromous”.
My gut feeling is that it’s a cheat of a word, compared to anadromous and catadromous. Yeah, the Pacific saury migrates to different regions of the ocean, BFD!
you’re just a hagfish-hag, BBBB
I want that painting! I just need to come up with a spare two grand…
For those thinking Sully’s Whiner Opus was worth a tussle? You were right.
New post.
Also that Tool cover is amazing. Especially love the little girl doing the vocals.
BBBB, there’s another one with three or four hagfish, that is less spendy.
Shorter Cerberus:
ENOUGH with the puns.
Nice illustration. Was it done by bspencer of lawyersgunsmoneyblog.com?
Seriously, that woman makes Thomas Kinkade into a paragon of good taste.