Can someone tell me if I am overreacting/pregnancy hormones, or if I had a right to be mad at this?
For about 5 years, my husband and I lived in Florida. Florida was always a bit red, but we lived there before DeSantis got into office, so it was manageable, especially living in a blue city. Everything went downhill once Desantis was elected.
My husband and I had a dream from the start of our relationship to move to Colorado, and once Florida politics got worse and worse, we decided to just up and move. Especially since we were starting to talk about having kids. I refused to have children in a state that has no human rights. Plus, as a bisexual, very pro choice woman, it was not the place for me. My husband agreed. The only reason he liked Florida was because of the warm weather, he has some chronic pain ailments and the cold weather makes them worse.
Anyway, I think from the time we moved, my mom held on to a glimmer of hope that I or we would move back. Always dropping little comments that I could move back in with mommy if my marriage doesn't work out (which I would never do). Trying to bait me by sending me photos of the beach saying "don't you miss this?" (no. Mountains > oceans. Plus, I can fly two hours to California, have a beach AND human rights! Win win!). Bragging that it's 80 degrees in February in the hopes that I'll say I miss it. This continued even after my husband and I bought a house here, basically showing the long term commitment of staying here. Her argument is because we live in a slightly red area of Colorado, it's "basically the same" as Florida and may as well come back. Um, no, it's not. At all. The city leans slight red and is surrounded by blue areas. It's been incessant little comments since we moved in 2021.
The "funny" thing is, my mom is a democrat. She hates Desantis. But, she loves the warm weather. And has, verbatim said "As much as I disagree with his politics, as a post menopausal, straight white woman, they don't have much of an impact on me". I like the warm weather too, as does my husband for reasons mentioned above. But human rights matter more to us, so if the cold becomes too much ever, we will move to California.
Now, I'm pregnant. Yay!! This has only made her comments much worse. We don't have any family in this state, BUT my husband and I are both self employed, doing very well financially, and we will both have the ability to be stay at home parents as we set our own schedule and have savings to not work for up to a year. My husband is extremely hands on, and I know he will do everything I do less breastfeeding and birth. I do not underestimate how hard parenting is, but I think I have an advantage being that we can both be stay at home parents, we can afford a post pardum doula, and my husband isn't a loser man child that sees childcare as "women's work".
I know this sounds dramatic, but I would literally rather be a single mother in a dingy studio apartment on welfare vs move back to Florida. This is truly how strongly and angry I feel about it.
The last time my mom made a comment relating to us moving back to Florida, I snapped. I lost it. I told her it's evident that she cares more about selfishly seeing me/her grandkid, then she does them having human rights (especially so if this child is a girl). She cares more about seeing me, than me having rights, and me being in a place that makes me happy. I said it's disgusting how she can care so little about politics that don't directly impact her life, especially as she was a teacher all her life, mostly teaching students of very marginalized backgrounds. I said "you literally live in the North Korea of the USA and you want me to come back??!" It was a very heated convo and we haven't spoken in a week.
If she genuinely and whole heartedly wants to see me and her grandkids more, nothing/no one is stopping her from selling her home and moving to Colorado. But ohhhhh noooo its cold here!!!!!!! It snows here!!!!!!! I don't know anyone there!!!!!!!!!!! It's more expensive!!!!!!!!!!
Is Colorado perfect politically? No, no location is perfect. But I love it here for reasons beyond politics. It is the most scenic and beautiful state I have ever seen. I take two to three hikes a week, and can't wait to do more 14ers once not pregnant. The people here are so much nicer too. Overall, there's very little I don't like here.
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