I dont care enough to make a throwaway.
This happened yesterday/currently on going.
You're probably wondering why thats the title? Well, that's why I'm here, you silly geese.
I (24M) had been with my now ex (25F) for exactly a year. (She broke up with me on our anniversary).
We have had our ups and downs, as every relationship, but some were a little more fierce than others. She's a recovering addict that comes from a very shady and abusive background/relationship, and I come from a lot of pessimism from my home life, and very toxic relationships in the past.
I'll be honest, when I pulled her, I was very insecure, and it started to show. My self deprication would leak out and I'd get scared that she would leave me, because I was nervous that I wasn't doing enough for her, but she would reassure me that I was enough and I actually do more than enough.
I would always give it 110%. I'd cook, clean, spoil her when I could, reaffirm her, go on adventures with her, everything. I gave up my home life and sacrificed my savings to even sign a lease with her and share an apartment with her. But I guess it's true what they say, you don't truly know someone until you live with them.
Granted, you could say that moving in without even KNOWING each other for a year is a little too quick, and in hindsight, I agree with you, but it was a sure fire way I knew I was going to have a roof over my head, and I'd be with my favorite person (for sub context, I'm glad I did bite the bullet and get a place with her because shortly after my parents got evicted so this actually worked out. ALSO my parents are terrible people and made my life miserable so I did everything I could to try to get out of there).
Things were going well when we first moved in! That 3 month love bug period or whatever. We were buying things to fill the space up, I had my own office/gaming lounge, we shared a nice big bedroom, it was great!
But then the lack of trust came in. I learned that she was checking my phone when I was sleeping trying to find any inclination of ME cheating on HER. Of course there was none of that, because I love her very much, and I did everything I could to be a healthy relationship for her and show her that I want her to heal and move on from her past traumas. She wanted me to get rid of all of my female friends because she didn't trust me. I obliged, apologized, and moved on from it. It was a little worrying because my exes did the same thing, granted there was never anything there between any of the women I was friends with (some I was very close with, I hope they're doing well).
I don't know, the thing that bothered me the most was that she was hypocritical about it, because she works a job where she is close and personal with her clients, a lot of them are male, which are far more rich and successful than I am. I come to learn that she actually has some of her male clients following her private social media and they have her personal phone number? This is when the arguments and the lack of trust on both sides began. We were both slowly crumbling the relationship, over things that were just speculation, or anxiety. Created in our head, trying to defend ourselves from getting hurt.
I should add some context as well, I'm a very lonely person. Besides her, I have 1, maybe 2 good friends. And I am a person who strives for interaction, so, when i started a new job, a person who approached me (who just so happened to be female), started talking to me, and we had similar interests, so we took each other's snapchats down (I don't know why we still use snapchat, I just felt as if it'd be weirder on my end for a phone number, also for the record, this person would save all of the chats to have a log of all conversations, and they saved everything even PHOTOS this is important for a little bit later).
I come home excited that I've made a new friend, and I talk a little bit about her. Time goes on, we get into little heated arguments about absolute nonsense, I can feel the relationship crashing down. A couple of weeks ago, she woke me up and asked me if I have a place to stay for the week. I was super confused, and asked why, and she opened my phone and showed me my conversation with my female friend. Which I was even more confused about, considering ALL THE CHATS AND SNAPS IN THE CONVERSATION WERE SAVED.
I was starstruck, and when I get confused or frustrated, I tend to raise my voice a little, not yell, but just become a little louder because I was trying to explain that there is LITERALLY nothing there and I have no interest in this person what so ever other than our shared interests. We get into a very big argument that night, and another FU I did was call her crazy. She didn't like that. Not. One. Bit. (Get the reference?
Tension in the apartment have been very high, and we seemed to have just tolerated each other and go on about our lives, but that fight, it stuck with me. I went to my journal to write. I wrote a draft of a breakup letter, it was 13 pages, and if I felt like I've had enough, I was going to sit her down, and have a talk, and whatever I couldn't get out in person, the letter had everything I could possibly want to say.
It's very important to note that I didn't give her this letter, and it was in my personal journal, which I have a lot of personal angry, depressive passages in there, because writing helps me, and it's also for my eyes only. Or so I thought.
We have our moments where things are really good, and then we'll shut each other out. Well, for the last couple of days, she's been shutting me out. She would barely speak to me, and that's rough considering we sleep in the same bed. I kept asking her what was wrong and if she wanted to talk about it but she just kept saying that it was work and she was tired.
Yesterday (11/16), she didn't text me all. day. So I finally bit the bullet. I asked her if she's breaking up with me. She said yes.
She went through my journal and found my letter. She said that's the nail in the coffin. She has already found someone to take my spot in the apartment, and I have to move all my stuff out today, by myself. We also just recently adopted two cats, which I'm going to miss so much.
I thought she was the one, I thought that if I tried hard enough and stuck through the suck, we were going to make it through the long haul.
I don't have any money, I'm spending my paycheck on a uhaul and packing supplies to get my stuff out, and I am going to stay at my sister's for a bit. But thats not permanent. I don't make enough money to live on my own, and I don't know/have anyone who I'd be willing to trust and live with in an apartment together. So yeah, that's where I'm at.
There's a lot of stuff I didn't put in because it's early and I'm tired, so if this blows up ill try and reply whenever I have time.
TLDR; TIFU by writing a breakup letter in my personal journal, my girlfriend went through it, and is breaking up with me and kicking me out.
UPDATE 1: I know it's kinda crazy I already have an update but rest assured, we are getting my name off of the lease. I will not be held liable for anything that happens.
She told me straight up that she couldn’t function without hitting her vape constantly. She said she even slept with it so she could hit it first thing in the morning and right before sleeping.
I thought she was joking… I should have listened.
She proceeded to hit her vape mid-hookup and it was the most unattractive thing I’ve ever seen. Immediate boner-killer.
Add on the shitty music that was playing way too loudly, the constant need to stop/readjust because her hips weren’t flexible, and just starfishing in general — safe the say it was the worst sexual experience I’ve ever had.
It’s a bummer because she was a very kind and funny person outside of that. But man… switching positions to go on your stomach and then reaching to hit the vape during sex is peak fiend behavior.
Or I’m bad at sex and I just bored her. Occam’s razor I guess :/
TL;DR - hooked up with a girl who hit her vape while having sex and it was the biggest turn off I’ve ever experienced.
I'm a 21 year old male, currently planning a Cascadian road trip consisting of Northern California, Oregon and Washington. I needed a new sleeping bag as my old blue one had too many holes and rips from years of use. I decided to take to the internet for a premium sleeping bag. I eventually added "Neoprene" into the search bar. For those who don't know, neoprene is used to keep surfers, triathletes and etc. warm in cold water. Since Neoprene can keep water out and insulate heat I figured its perfect for chilly, misty climates.
The first result I found, I clicked on it. The page was titled "665 Neoprene Sleepsack". I was instantly impressed and I bought one on the spot without reading the description. I thought it would be perfect, it could keep me dry and warm in Washington. After waiting 5 days, the sleeping bag arrived from Los Angeles.
I opened the box and unfolded the plastic wrap from the sleeping bag. When I held it, it felt soft and spongey, very similar to a wetsuit. My roommate came into the living room and complimented my latest camping gear. I said thanks and then decided to try it on. I got on the carpet and climbed in. The sleeping bag has something called "internal sleeves", which are basically sleeves on the inside that are stitched in place where they can't move around, however I didn't realize that meant it immobilizing your arms. I thought the feature was something entirely new and I thought "cool! I'll stay even warmer!"
My roommate was about to go to the store, but I realized that I can't zip it up without a second hand so I quickly asked him if he could zip it up and he said sure. I was already in the bag with my arms in the sleeves (again, sleeves that don't move, thus your arms can't move) and my roommate helped zip me up. I said thanks and he said he'll be back in 15 minutes.
He walked out and locked the door behind him. I spent about a minute getting cozy. But then I tried exiting the sleeping bag. I couldn't get my arms out of the internal sleeves. I tried backing my elbows out, no use. I tried poking a hole, too thick. I struggled to get out for about 10 more minutes. Then, my roommate came back, wondering why I didn't get out of it yet. I told him my arms were stuck in the sleeves. He pulled down the zipper to let me out.
Still not realizing it was a BDSM item, I figured it might have been a design flaw. I called the company up and a man answered. I explained to him that there might be a design flaw in the neoprene sleepsack as I couldn't get out of it on my own. The man was a little puzzled and asked if I could repeat what I said. I did but with more detail. The man was dead silent for a solid 5 seconds. He then stated "Sir, you're not supposed to get out on your own... The neoprene sleepsack is a BDSM item, not a sleeping bag for camping." He hung up. And my face turned cherry red. I was embarrassed af. My roommate later asked about what happened and I simply just said "Oh, it's just a design flaw" to save me the embarrassment.
EDIT: I had no idea there was a 18+ pop-up, I have a browser extension that blocks all pop-ups. I also literally only looked at the first two pictures and the sizing chart. It just looked like a wetsuit version of a sleeping bag to me.
Morals of the Story:
(by u/PawnWithoutPurpose) Don’t assume you’re intelligent and know things about stuff.
And also, read the description.
TL;DR: I unknowingly bought a BDSM item without checking the description, I found that out the hard way.
