First I'll start by explaining that as a foster child I had some extremely traumatic experience with a particular dentist. In hindsight I can tell that he was a sadist, but at the moment I didn't understand. He was very mean and he always hurt me and I didn't really have anyone to turn to because my foster parents either didn't care or didn't believe me. As a result I have extreme anxiety about going to the dentist and I generally prefer to get put out for anything more major than a filling rather than sit there for hours having an anxiety attack.
This isn't my first foray into wildly reacting to sedatives, but it is my most embarrassing one. There were no outbursts the last time I was sedated at the dentist, although I did keep waking up and trying to vape until they took my vape away from me. I was told I accepted this readily and didn't make a fuss, just laid back down. Also, previously, after a knee surgery I found my phone on my ride home and I texted a few of my more shiftless coworkers and told them exactly what I thought of their efforts. Luckily we're all friends and I'm not the hold anything back kind of guy, so they'd already heard it all before. They just thought it was hilarious and made fun of me about it for a couple months. In reality, when I'm not full of sedatives I'm not the same asshole and I'm more likely to offer help than complain or judge, even if I do shit talk while I do it. Unfortunately, today's experience might take a little bit more walking back on my part. This time turned out a little different. Maybe a lot different. This time I really fucked up.
Before the procedure I tried to remind them that it takes a surprising amount of sedative to keep me unconscious but they decided to be safe and just go with the minimum to start with. This meant that I wasn't fully out, but I was chill enough to just zone out to music and mostly not mind what was happening. At least, until the point that I decided I did mind. In fact I minded very much. An embarrassing amount, actually.
After a little while of dozing in and out of twilight sleep the dentist started doing some weird thing where he would jerk on my cheek very hard as he pierced my gum and jaw with what felt like a needle. Later they explained this as a distraction from the pain of was using a syringe to inject a local anesthetic. But at this moment it didn't matter what he was doing, I'd had enough. I suddenly jerked my head a little bit when he jerked my cheek for the 4th or fifth time and the needle went into the tip of my tongue, instantly numbing one side of my tongue. Really it was my fault, but I was in no condition to accept that. I don't really know what I thought in that moment, but I know that I was not thrilled.
I pushed my very kind dentist and at least one other person away from me, stood up, and started yelling and swearing at everyone, swaying around drunkenly, screaming God knows what. I was dizzy as hell, I'm not sure if I understood what was happening at all. I edged my way around the room until my back was against a wall so no one could sneak up on me. By now there was an uproar and probably five or six staff were there in front of me with wide eyes and hands held out in front of them, begging me to chill out. I have no idea what I was saying but I ranted the entire time. A good few minutes at least. I know I said I was pissed, that there's no reason to jerk on my cheek if I'm sleeping because if I'm sleeping you don't have to disguise the pain, and anyways I'm 40 years old, you're not fooling me. Just give me the shot and save your cheek pulling games for children. At one point the very sweet tech ask me if I'd had caffeine or Adderall or any sort of stimulants in the last 24 hours that would keep me awake (I hadn't). This also offended me for some reason, so I started ranting about that too. Loudly.On and on I went, backed up against the wall with my fists up in front of me, swaying like an alcoholic. There was a wedge in my mouth holding my teeth apart that at some point I took out and threw away from myself. I was still attached to the blood pressure machine and I was jerking it around, someone had to hold on to it to keep it from tipping over. All in all it was ugly. Very ugly.
Eventually the reality of the situation started to dawn on me. I realized that was surrounded by dental staff, who were 75% kindly older women, all of them watching with horrified expressions as I realed drunkenly, bouncing my 250 lb frame around and screaming blearily from behind clenched fists. As it dawned on me I calmed down, and because I actually like them all very much and they're always kind to me I was able to pull it together and sit back down. They gave me more sedative, eventually I passed back out, and by the time I woke up it was time to go home. I didn't really remember a single thing about the appointment in that moment. I was just ready to go home and go to bed for a few hours.
Fast forward to evening and I'm now finally sober enough to process thoughts. I just got a voicemail from the dentist about 12 hours later, very cautiously inquiring into my well-being, which brought that flood of half-memories back to mind. I'm very embarrassed. This is my first dentist that I have had as an adult, my first dentist that I returned to, and I was really hoping for it to be my last dentist as well. Hopefully they take me back. I plan to go down there tomorrow with some flowers and a very heartfelt apology. And hopefully they make a note in my chart to throw in a little extra sedative next time they have to put me out.
TL;DR: I woke up mid procedure and tried to fight the entire staff for a few minutes until they were able to convince me to calm down and sit back down.
