r/TwoXChromosomes: You are the community. You have all the power of the internet to mold it.

Context so everything makes sense: I (26f) work nights. As a courtesy to some single moms in my apartment complex, I will watch their kids either before they get on the bus OR after they get off the bus for 3 days a week. The moms will plan together what days and what time they want, and let me know.

I say single moms because single dads always try to hit on me and have forced their way into my home to ask me out while picking up their kids. Never again. But I am still happy to lighten the load for women half the school week.

A single father new to the complex heard about this and randomly dumped his kids at my door at 6:30AM. No knock, no introduction, no asking if it's OK. I pulled in to my parking space to see 2 abandoned kids under 10 at my door while it's still winter here. I didn't even know their names. I had to call around to get his number to tell him to pick up his kids.

His only defense was, "Well you do it for the women!" I explained to him the arrangement the "women" and I have, and that if he would like me to watch his kids from 7AM to bus pickup, he needs to ask first. Being told he has to ask offended him so badly you'd think I'd insulted his grandmother. It escalated to me threatening to call the cops for child abandonment if he ever drops his kids at my door again. I had to threaten police action to get him to listen.

I told the moms about it and one did say she explained the arrangement to him, and offered to ask if he was interested. This was the day before he left his kids at a stranger's door. A stranger he'd never met and who wasn't even home at the time. Where can I buy this audacity so I can use it to ask for a raise?

Edit: I explained to the moms why I don't deal with men. Everyone understood, the woman who told him was very apologetic, and most had already assumed men being pushy and/or predatory was why I don't offer help to dads in the complex. So on that front I'm still good.

Edit 2: I didn't want to risk putting the kids in the system if he's only moderately neglectful. I've heard a lot of horror stories from people who've been in the system in our area. We're also riding the poverty line here, and fighting for your kids without the money to really fight is almost impossible. Someone suggested I get in contact with their mom and keep her in the loop, and I'm going to try that for now. If it happens again, I'll call the police just so he'll learn.

Let's be real, the kids lose either way. At least at the apartment complex they have neighbors to go to if he turns out to be worse. I can't guarantee they'll have that at a foster home. Isolated foster homes feature in most traumatic experiences I've heard.