My boyfriend is an andraite originally from Srikakulam. I am a Tamilian originally from Kerala but my family is settled in Mumbai for generations. He is a very nice person and we share a healthy relationship.

The main reason for my doubt is dowry. My boyfriend has mentioned a few times that dowry is very common in their community (in crores apparently) for engineer boys, especially those who might to go the USA(he is planning to). I had made it plenty clear that we do not give dowry and I'm a working woman, so I will be supporting him anyway. He agreed to it then and was progressive about it. On the one occasion that I met his parents, they enquired if my family had their own home in Mumbai (they don't, they live on rent). After that point, my boyfriend has been bringing up stuff about my house and my mom's pension every once in a while, keeping on commenting about how "rich" we are (we are the extremely middle class who just got lucky).

I feel this is going to be an issue in the future, as I've read on Reddit that Andhra folks take pride in their dowry. I will not give dowry and his parents don't seem like the sort to be okay with it. I don't want this to be a problem after marriage because the marriage can spiral down badly after that.

How can I test his real intentions? Should I really marry this guy?

Edit: Please stop downvoting my post.

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Posted by19 hours ago

Rant / Vent

CRED screwed me massively - incurring daily late fees, how can I hold them accountable?

Update: Appreciate all the useful comments from everyone. After considering everything, I talked to HDFC & Cred again threatening an RBI Ombudsman complaint and well...at least HDFC responded. They told me details of the incorrect account it has been transferred to (which Cred has not even acknowledged). I never have/had multiple credit cards so its definitely a mistake on Cred's part. Uninstalling Cred right away. My charges will be rolled back once HDFC receives the indemnity form. Hopefully, the credit score too is corrected. Seems like a sure battle to get my credit score back up. I will delete the post soon as its quite a lot of distraction to deal with, while also working. Thank you everyone.

So, I paid for my HDFC credit card, outstanding amount on 1st March. CRED confirmed that the payment is made so I relaxed. Until yesterday, when HDFC called me to say my dues are still pending. Raised numerous complaints on HDFC and CRED but no one is caring to follow-up. I am being charged late fee and interest, I cannot afford to pay the due amount again (it was quite a lot).

I check the transactions on my credit card, and there is no credited amount for me to prove that CRED deposited the amount with HDFC. The amount was promptly deducted from my account and I have UPI reference number saying it was sent to CRED successfully.

CRED provides me with a UTR number however cannot themselves prove they paid HDFC. I'm incurring late fees running between the two but none of these institutions can verify the payment.

CRED has no customer support for a big tech organisation, I cannot call anyone. I just raise tickets and they close the tickets automatically. Who do I complain to for help? Am I doomed to be screwed by 'fintech'?

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203 comments

Posted by9 hours ago

AskIndia

Sympathy, or Scam: How to Tell the Difference?

So a couple of weeks ago, I was returning home from a meeting it was noon. this poor woman in her 30s approaches me with her 8ish-year-old girl. she said she wanted to buy groceries but she didn't have any money. I felt bad so I offered to help. I wasn't carrying any cash so I told her I will pay for the grocery directly to the cashier (google pay) she was ok with that so I assumed that she genuinely needed these groceries. we went to this small reliance store, I stand next to the exit door and let her and her daughter buy stuff. when she was done I was shocked.

she took 1 kg of almonds, some fruit juice, oreo biscuits, some chips, and other things. I told her I offered to buy her basic groceries like atta, rice, dal, and some chocolates for her daughter but these were not what I expected. I told her to remove some stuff and add what she really needs like rice and stuff. she replied "her son is sick and the doctor told her to eat these". I knew she was bluffing, I said sorry I can't pay for these, and I went.

I wish i knew how really needs help.

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Posted by22 hours ago

Politics