Thinking about how Finn said that “personal growth” and “learning things about themselves” thing not about Mike in the chair like I misremembered (I grouped it in with the “normal” line) BUT IN RESPONSE TO A QUESTION ABOUT MIKE AND EL’S RELATIONSHIP.
Listen, I know that El learned knew stuff and that is clear. But the idea that Mike learned new things about himself and went through personal growth when the primary focus was on his joint relationship implies to me that that wasn’t the only thing he was thinking about.
Also, I am thinking about the things he did need to learn about himself for the introspection required for the I love you speech, but it almost feels like an omission of more unreliable narration that we weren’t let in on the transition of him figuring that out - seemingly between the painting scene and the speech but including prior, more ambiguous scenes.
It was a payoff to him not saying I love you for both of them on the surface but actually…what was it a payoff to? Because conceptually the like structure pitch is “he can’t say I love you then he does” not the PLOT. So it is FASCINATING to me that it wasn’t emphasized to us at all. Like no further scenes to show how El feels unloved after that one scene for the rest of the season other than parallels GA wouldn’t catch. And more importantly, we did not see Mike’s inability causing him any pain or making him feel pent up. We saw it clearly causing him guilt. But there was no emphasis or representation whatsoever of what he was actually going through. The anxiety reasoning wasn’t presented until right before - in the previous episode to the speech. Everything else was ambiguous and seemed to be more guilt oriented surrounding how it made El feel that he couldn’t and the following events causing her to leave. He felt at fault for her leaving and possibly being in danger and he felt bad about how they left things. He wanted her back. But that is a separate concept from how he was feeling about being incapable of saying it even BEFORE she brought it up. If she hadn’t been hurt and there hadn’t been consequences…would he have been comfortable? What internal effect was it having? Was there torment? Was he trying to say/write it? Did he not even notice and just subconsciously omit it?
The fact that we don’t know is what’s crazy to me. Because it means that the set up and payoff are bookended but not earned. We are told he can’t say I love you and she’s sad about it. We talk about other shit for 7 episodes (yes, including Mike, because I am not counting guilt, only explanation). Then he says I love you. EMPHASIS ON We talk about other shit for 7 episodes. It was not about them. Mike felt guilty and El was preoccupied. We are told we should care but it just feels weird. Because honestly? I DO care! But the way that the writers handled it dampened that a little bit. It didn’t ignite it. Not in a like dampening joy sense just like a flame that wasn’t tended to and died out. It wasn’t tended to. They didn’t maintain anything but “I couldn’t tell her but I wish I had told her…you know…that”. Okay so all we know total is that he wishes he had been able to tell her and she wishes he had been able to tell her but we don’t know WHY he couldn’t tell her and we only know that she wishes he HAD been able to tell her. We don’t have enough details to know if saying it now would even fix things because the thing that hurt already happened! It might fix things! But we were given insufficient information to know that!
It feels earned. But only for the people watching the show for them. It would be like Byler kissing in season 5 episode 1. It’s out of the blue. It’s unearned. The fans following subtext are excited, but your average Joe was NOT paying attention to those side details and implied subtextual messaging enough to know or care or get behind it. Nice. Good for them. Now what else is on. If you’re just a general audience member, it satisfied just enough. It’s a band aid. It’s a slapped on excuse. It’s a question’s answer spat out just for the people who don’t care enough to ask any more. “What’s gonna fix that” “I love you” “oh…ok…fixed”. It’s for the people who care about the concept of a plot conflict being resolved more than the specifics of what that conflict or resolution even are. There was a question. There was tension until it was answered. It was answered. Nobody cares what the answer was.
If you think about it, there is only a setup and payoff - no build. That’s not how that goes. That’s not how writing works - at least not when you’re trying for that. You can’t just say “I want this”, wait a while and then give it to them. They didn’t do anything to achieve it. Mike was venting but we didn’t watch him do any sort of work on himself or introspection or anything really to achieve what he seemed to. Even his reaction to the big thing that supposedly would cause that adjustment wasn’t shown to us. And El’s plot wasn’t even about that at all. If anything, the fight was a driving force for her to run into the arms of her main plot. They essentially created a clear and easy setup, executed an unrelated complicated and planned plot, and then were like “oh yeah” and wrote an ending.
Except, obviously, they didn’t. They would have done that if they didn’t care. But they do care. Which is why it was purposeful.
It’s just like what I just said about the M&M’s season 3 season in the hospital being right in the middle of the action. They don’t want you to care about their romantic relationship. They don’t want you to be against it and they want you to be in support of them in general, which is why they have plenty of scenes with focus like the pineapple pizza scene - platonic and happy. But multiple of their payoffs are plotlines are deprioritized. From the start. Mike and Lucas were fighting and they needed to stick together to find Will - One of El’s narrative functions there being to drive them apart to hinder that ability. Mike was with Will and El was finding her family. El was with Max. It was one-sided). El was regaining her memories and Mike was struggling with guilt.
They have always either had other primary focus or only one of them was focused on the other. And what did all these seasons end with? They kissed after bonding, but amidst a focus of Mike and Lucas’ fighting and overcoming for the sake of friendship. They went to the Snow Ball together, but after spending the whole season with other people. They got back together, but after one of them not initiating anything in that regard (ironically, her grief caused her focus to shift - not that it wasn’t one of her focuses it just wasn’t #1). Mike said I love you, but only after she spent the whole season working through her lab trauma. Their plots were not buildups to their payoffs. They never have been. Because their payoffs have always been romantic. But the little moments sprinkled out have been what’s really important. While it hasn’t been emphasized like the unearned moments, it has been there throughout. ( Also I don’t know where to add this in but the distraction of Max cutting the speech off aka being a priority basically saying “other things are still happening” just like the cuts in the hospital scene did: “there are more important things” was more of the energy than them feeling connected at all.)
Because their platonic relationship may not be the big music swell, but it’s what will stick with you. Because those are the moments that were given the time and the true focus. They weren’t distracted from. Because those platonic moments are both the most important ones FROM their relationship and their relationship is not the most important thing from their individual storylines. So the built up arcs, the earned ones, have been something different. Not gonna list again but prime example: El telling Brenner no and standing confident in her decision rather than being told “I love you”.
They have important moments together but the moments that would supposedly end their arc for the season are unearned because the romantic nature and what they actually are was previously referenced but not built up. The moments given the time of day were not buildup or payoffs at all, but rather little in between moments where they simply enjoyed one another or offered understanding and support. Their plots are romantic and that’s why they don’t work. Because the most important part of their relationship has always been just being there.
