This is what Kerið crater lake actually looks like. Nobody calls it the "Eye of the World".

metajog · 2022-07-06T10:58:41+00:00

" They call me the meme machine

I catch the memes, I spread the memes

I eat the memes, I shit the memes

Without memes, I will die

Inhale the memes

Exhale the memes

Inject the memes into my bloodstream

There are good memes, and there are bad memes

Why has God abandoned us? (Help me)

Smoke the memes, snort the memes

Take the memes until you OD

If you borrowed my memes then you owe me

A new fresh pair of memes "

- Pink Guy

metajog · 2022-07-06T10:36:15+00:00

Ok, ouch? I'm 30. My 20s were rough, but rewarding nonetheless. I struggled with alcoholism for YEARS. I had a hole in my heart from a difficult childhood. It took a lot of time and therapy and finding the right friends to heal. I've been sober for over a year now. I'm told I have excellent relationship skills and I'm desirable to women. At least the INFJ I'm currently dating thinks so anyways... but I digress.

When you call someone an addict or imply that they are non-committal it is a judgement about one's character. There's a massive difference between "because they're addicts", and "because they're struggling with drug addiction."
The latter would not offend me. I don't identify as an alcoholic anymore. I'm a former one.

Point is, don't be judgy. Don't make sweeping generalizations. Be compassionate and empathetic instead.

metajog · 2022-07-06T10:26:31+00:00

It's always pejorative when used in the way she did.

metajog · 2022-07-06T07:06:03+00:00

And then I said, "but boss, I'm a jungler. I don't have a lane. I wander the map and create opportunities for the team."

metajog · 2022-06-26T08:25:59+00:00

My first real girlfriend was an ESFP. She was my biggest fan. And her own biggest fan. And with her unshakeable confidence (but very shakeable booty) she would often challenge me intellectually because she knew I loved it.

We were both Psychology students. She loved a good debate too. If we disagreed on something or I was pushy about "defeating her" she would just stonewall me with "Well that's how I feel, take it or leave it!". Boy could she dance... an ESFP Jamaican? We always stole the show!

Yes ESFPs are awesome people and love to talk (casual or serious), entertain, and help their friends.

metajog · 2022-06-26T08:14:03+00:00

Trickster in the moment perhaps. But it's the "afterglow" where I learn to listen to myself and start to analyse my internal feelings. Some insights can be confusing, while others jump out at me with intense clarity. Like "Wow I had no idea just how much X meant to me until now." Or "I really need to stop doing Y so I can be true to myself. Y has no place in my life".

I've had many many valuable insights on "fungi". One time I ate some with my friend Molly... We had a moment of existential self-realization that it is indeed okay to love yourself for who you are...even if you're not quite sure about your identity yet. It's a learning process. But feeling love strongly always helps reinforce my identity. I'm a lover first, debater second ;)

metajog · 2022-06-26T00:02:37+00:00

I uh, consumed a lot of fungus to strengthen my Fi. Seriously.

metajog · 2022-06-24T15:30:47+00:00

Also, I agree it is too much. Consider the top 10 the only cultures/identities I have a real and present association with.

Edit: With you on the always minimalist hipster train. Not sure what a clean or neat hipster is, but it doesn't quite sound like me LOL

metajog · 2022-06-24T09:38:26+00:00

A practitioner/enthusiast of Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. I was into it for 9 months or so. It couldn't hold my attention long term, as with so many other cultures I've tried.

metajog · 2022-06-24T00:24:14+00:00

Not at all. You aren't "trolling" them if your intent is to devalue them as individuals for being part of a sub-culture you loath. You are straight up harassing and manipulating them. They will stop being friends with you long before you manage to change their mind (unless you are a cunning narcicisst).

It sounds like you have an underdeveloped (Fe) External Feeling function. If you were able to empathize with furries' seemingly bizarre tastes & sensibilities a little bit, you would feel how wrong it is to convince them they are outcasts/losers who should be ashamed of their interests/fetishes/behaviors.

Haven't you ever experienced someone trying to tell you something about your identity that you disagreed with, but they continued judging you anyways? Perhaps someone completely misunderstands you for a hobby, interest, passion, or sexual taste? It is infuriating, and if it comes from a person I care about, makes me *FEEL BAD* about MYSELF.

That's what you're doing to your "friend". You're making him feel bad about himself, making him mostly dislike you, but also himself :*(

metajog · 2022-06-23T23:54:28+00:00

I wouldn't say I've ever really jointed a particular culture. I'm an outsider, an observer. I mesh and mingle with all groups so that I can find out more about them. I'll adopt habits, styles, lingo, hobbies from certain groups, especially so I can relate to them better :) Sometimes these lifestyle choices even become permanent. I just don't like when people think I'm a poser because I'm trying to 'fit in" with people.I just enjoy figuring out new things (Ti), exploring new perspectives & ideas so I can make myself and others happy (Ne), express interest in those "things" and the people who do them so friend/group X values my company (Fe), and using my diverse past experiences with other cultures/cliques (Si) to draw interesting connections and conclusions about my own identity as well as my friends.

Some of these are like High School/College cliques/cultures, but I'll just list the ones I associate with most in descending order. As an ENTP, you must know it's hard to form a cohesive identity for one's self, so I think that's why we end up mingling with and "trying" so many cultures , subcultures and counter-cultures. Eventually, we find a few circles we really stick to for good though :D

Computer / Tech Nerd

Yogi / Meditation / Vedic Student

Gamer

Philosopher/ Debater

Tabletop / Fantasy / Roleplaying Geek

Audiophile / Cinephile / AV Nerd

Anime Nerd / Otaku

Outdoorsman

Hipster

Visual Artist

Socialite

Edit: to make more in line with my comments with OP below.

------------------------

(these are stored in the memory banks, for potential future access)

Stoner

Freestyle Skiier

Breakdancer / Bboy

Athlete / Jock

Skater

Academic

Gym Bro

EDM Bro

BJJ Bro

Band Geek (Musician)

Punk

Goth

Prep

Raver

Slacker

Rebel / Delinquent

metajog · 2022-06-23T21:56:08+00:00

I am the happiest I have ever been in my career because my job title is "creative strategist". I chose it myself ;) . I am responsible for digital marketing, branding, web/UI/UX design & development, video editing, photo editing, presentations, holding meetings and directing creative projects for various companies we have a majority stake in. One is a large scale bakery, one is vertical farming tech, etc. Not to mention the social-impact branch of my parent company, which I do work for developing promotional materials, doing PR, social media, etc.

There are endless opportunities for me in this job which prevent me from getting bored. I'm still developing the project management side of things, but my ability to come up with effective long-term solutions but also find novel, pragmatic solutions for our creative/tech needs is my biggest strength. Last week we really wanted a slow motion shot of some of the automated vertical farming machinery doing its thing. The videographer only recorded in 30fps... Come on, not even 60?? Anyways I managed to crank it up to 120fps using some AI frame interpolation software called RIFE.

"This is why I get to have an RTX 3080ti in my Lenovo. It's not for gaming, I swear!", I bantered with a colleague. Not so humble brag, but my point was to illustrate the kinds of solutions my ENTP mind comes up with on a dime. And people compliment me on my ideas, strategies and solutions quite often, so I feel like my efforts are recognized and adding proper value to the company. So yeah, I feel like I have the perfect "job" right now. I don't often feel like I'm working, mostly playing :)

“Choose a job you love, and you will never work a day in your life.”
Well, Confucius, It's not always easy as "choosing", one has to apply themselves and prove to others they are capable for certain roles. I had to prove to myself that I was even capable for this role. I used to not be so confident in myself...

metajog · 2022-05-08T00:03:28+00:00

That really sucks man. Your mom was in denial. I had a close friend who was hesitant to reveal his sexuality to me in High School. He must have been carrying a lot of internalized shame around it, sadly. I'm straight and figured he was bi long before he told me so I tried to drop little clues to demonstrate that I'm not judgemental about sexuality. He felt relieved after he told me naturally.

I guess he feared the reaction you got OP: "that changes things".
Makes me genuinely sad that people out there think like that.

metajog · 2022-03-31T15:36:32+00:00

If you do some research into cyclothymia, the consensus among professionals is somewhat nebulous. The symptoms seem to dip into pretty much every other comorbid mental illness that I have or have had save for a few. The DSM V however, has strict timeframes for the depressive and hypomanic phases of Cyclothymia. Must have had at least a 2 year depressive phase, must have had few (or none) periods of stable mood that last no longer than 2 months. It is essentially Bipolar II, but with weaker, more frequent and rapid moodswings, Dysthemia/Atypical Depression instead of Major Depressive Disorder & exclusively hypomania (no full mania, no psychosis).

The social anxiety was a result of years of drinking and slowly becoming socially inept because I was dependent on alcohol to socialize. Yes, I saw major changes from giving my mind and body time to undo the damage from drinking. I have been drinking problematically for about 10 years and it just got worse every year. I managed to defeat Social Anxiety (and deep depression) by getting sober for a significant period of time, meditating, doing Yoga, doing CBT and addiction therapy, making genuine/rewarding connections with people and repairing relationships slowly but surely. All this culminated in a big self-esteem and confidence boost . The gradual deconstruction of self-destructive and illogical thought patterns via CBT and therapy allowed me to start thinking more rationally and analytically again.

The panic disorder was actually the catalyst for my alcoholism. I'm talking 10 years ago when I was 19. I had separation anxiety, trust issues, I felt an overwhelming lack of independence and suffocating level of control by my parents when I came home from boarding school, awaiting my first semester of university. They've always been extremely controlling and relied on punishment to control me, which was ineffective because I had an extreme disdain for authority at this point. I developed anxiety in boarding school from the academic stress, but I enjoyed it overall.

Then came an anxiety attack before I graduated, then when I came home I started having actual panic attacks within a week. I self medicated like crazy with alcohol because my parents had a metric shiteload of liquor in a locked closet. I learned to pick the lock. I got prescribed Clonazepam from a psych to kill the panic. I was also drinking on them... not good. I'll skip the details:

I got a DUI, became depressed, started taking antidepressants, went to university completely unmotivated, dropped out. Took time off to do a lot of therapy, visit friends, and learning how to meditate properly. My instructor urged me to stop taking the antidepressants, so I did. I was scared shitless of more panic attacks happening, but at this point I had been meditating every day for a month, doing breathing exercises and working out regularly. That is how I got over panic attacks mostly. I've only had 2 minor panic attacks since, and they were triggered by weed.

metajog · 2022-03-31T12:20:16+00:00

I suspect that I may have Cyclothymia. I'd love to hear your opinions on my experiences.

I'll be 30 in two months. I think I have experienced 8-9 hypomanic episodes over the last 7 years. I think that's when it started. But I've only recognized the patterns recently. The episodes vary in duration from 1 month-1 year.

When I'm not hypomanic I default to mild depression of some kind. I don't think I've experienced full-blown mania before because I've never had psychosis. I've only had one major depressive episode, but that was absolutely caused by severe Alcohol dependency. I have been sober for almost a year now though. : )

My official psychiatric diagnoses are all very comorbid with each other so it is difficult to tell which one is which. Am I cyclothymic? Or do I have atypical depression? Maybe I only have dysthymia and my understanding of "hypomania" is off...

Psychiatric diagnoses:

Inattentive ADHD (ADD), Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Atypical Depression (remission?), Social Anxiety (remission), Alcohol Use Disorder (remission), Panic Disorder (remission)

The depression is often mild, but I am more depressed than not (60:40 I'd say). The most intense symptoms of hypomania for me have been euphoria, hyper-focus (also ADHD), increased sociability and confidence, reduced need for sleep/insomnia, increased impulsivity and energy/hyperactivity. I can get irritable as well. My impulsivity is not an issue outside of hypomania & hyperactivity has been a non´-issue with my "ADD".

Many of the symptoms are quite pleasant and manageable actually. I have been much more productive at work for the last 2 months when I suddenly snapped out of depression. It was actually quite Jarring how sudden it was and people noticed, in a good way. People think I'm more amicable, but definitely notice the hyperactivity.

What I want to know is, do I actually have Cyclothymia? It sure seems like I might, but I have my doubts about the diagnosis as a whole since it is loosely defined, underdiagnosed and contentious among Psychologists and

However, the following excerpt from the Wikipedia Page for Cyclothymia is an eerily accurate reflection of my own subjective experiences over the last 7 years. Some parts are such accurate descriptions of my cyclic mood issues and highs and lows with interpersonal relationships that I teared up while reading it...

In addition to sensation-related disorders, cyclothymia has also been associated with atypical depression. In one study, a connection was found between interpersonal sensitivity, mood reactivity (i.e., responding to actual or potential positive events with brighter mood), and cyclothymic mood swings,[6] all of which are symptoms of atypical depression. Cyclothymia also tends to occur in conjunction with separation anxiety, where a person has anxiety as a result of separation from a caregiver, friend, or loved one. Other issues that tend to co-occur with cyclothymia include social anxiety, fear of rejection and a tendency toward hostility to those connected with past pain and rejection. People with cyclothymia tend to seek intense interpersonal relationships when in a hypomanic state and isolation when in a depressed state.[6] This generally leads to short, tumultuous relationships.[6]

metajog · 2021-10-28T15:02:43+00:00

Corpus from Morrowind. First you hear whispers that convinces you to join a cult that worships a nihilistic Dwarven robot-god. Then you develop enormous cancerous growths and become violent and insane. Worst of all is that you become immortal.

metajog · 2021-10-28T14:04:04+00:00

The last 2 hours of your work time for white-collar workers are probably only 25-50%.

Well this fact also supports my case for a shorter work day. If you're only 25-50% as productive for the last two hours. Cut one of those hours off and you have a marginal loss in productivity, with no need to waste work time taking a nap. I see your point though, I just would rather keep work and home activities (like sleeping) separate, while maximizing the efficiency of the time you actually do spend working..

metajog · 2021-10-28T12:23:57+00:00

Why not just shorten the work day by the amount the employees get to sleep? Would rather leave work 1 hour earlier then have 1 hour of napping time.

metajog · 2021-10-06T10:11:09+00:00

Inte lika bra som deras korv.

metajog · 2021-09-27T10:55:27+00:00

Cruelty Squad

metajog · 2021-02-28T18:15:16+00:00

Hahaha så efterbliven.

metajog · 2020-11-30T13:47:29+00:00

Yup, this is not "aww" material it's "naww".

metajog · 2020-10-25T17:12:35+00:00

Jag körde från Stockholm till Sundsvall för 2 år sedan och såg den här platsen. Jag var så förvirrad. Varför i helvete är ett kinesiskt slott bredvid en motorväg in the middle of nowhere?

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