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  1. Retweeted
    22 hours ago

    You telling me a crab rang this goon

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  2. Retweeted
    5 May 2015
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  3. Retweeted
    Jun 28

    (trump addressing rally, eyes closed) the most tremendous cube. the most beautiful cube, and i'm rotating, i'm rotating it, we love to see it don't we, you love to see it, rotating at such tremendous speeds. rotating and rotating and rotating (crowd going wild)

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  4. Jun 27
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  5. Retweeted
    Jun 26
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  6. Retweeted
    Jun 27

    A baby sloth yawning is the best!!! 🥰 On this lovely Sunday, remember to take it easy, take a deep breath and relax. Enjoy your family, your friends, and get ready for another wonderful week.

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  7. Retweeted
    Jun 26
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  8. Retweeted
    Jun 24
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  9. Retweeted
    Jun 24

    someone please show this tweet to alan moore and film his reaction

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  10. Retweeted

    Explained occurrences: redditor runs into daylight savings time

    Reddit post from r glitch in the matrix - I just relived the same hour. At 1:55 am, I clearly remember looking at my phone and making a mental note of the time. I looked up a few minutes later and it was 1:01. I thought that maybe there was some glitch with the phone so I checked my computer and same thing, well 1:02 by this time. I googled what time is it and got the same answer. So I have been sitting on the bed slightly panicked over the last hour, desperately hoping I wasn't reliving the same hour over and over again. Thankfully the clock turned to 2. No idea why I relived that hour, but I'm going to try and get some sleep now. EDIT: I'm an idiot.
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  11. Retweeted
    Jun 21

    IM AM DRY HEAVING THE FUCKNG SCREAM

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  12. Retweeted
    Jun 23

    *sees a guy with visible spaghetti vomit on his sweater* wow, on the surface he looks calm and ready

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  13. Jun 22
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  14. Jun 21

    Our barbershop quartet needs a fourth

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  15. Jun 19
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  16. Retweeted
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  17. Jun 19

    Major coup on the part of whoever does PR for Mel Gibson that they're still using this Road Warrior era headshot

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  18. Jun 17
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  19. Jun 17
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  20. Jun 17
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