Scrooge in the Hood (2011)

Actors: Timothy J. Anders (actor), Jim Baker (actor), James Barrett (actor), William Bloomfield (actor), David Bockenkamp (actor), Mike Brophy (actor), Joe Campanella (actor), Kassandre Casame (actor), Richard Chandler (actor), Matthew Colicci (actor), Larry Dacosta (actor), T. Shane Doyle (actor), Craig Goedecke (actor), Kurt Gombar (actor), Allan Alexander (actor),

Plot: Charles Dickens' classic heart warming tale...not really. The Jewish mafia has decided to steal Scrooge's whoring business and ruin the holidays; all the while Scrooge is visited by the three ghosts of Christmas, who attempt to show him the errors of his greedy ways.

Keywords: alcohol, bathroom, bathroom-stall, blood, fetish, ghosts, gun, gunfire, gunshot, match
Genres: Comedy,
Taglines: Merry Christmas Motha Fucka! We put the DICK in Charles DICKens!

Quotes:

Scrooge: Boy, shut your mouth before I pimp-slap your ass back into your mama's womb.

A Christmas Carol (1999)

Actors: Desmond Barrit (actor), Daniel Booroff (actor), Jack Chissick (actor), Leagh Conwell (actor), Matthew Cottle (actor), Kenny Doughty (actor), Barnaby Francis (actor), John Franklyn-Robbins (actor), Roger Frost (actor), Gawn Grainger (actor), Richard E. Grant (actor), Michael Green (actor), Joel Grey (actor), Roger Hammond (actor), Bruce Alexander (actor),

Plot: Scrooge is a miserly old businessman in 1840's London. One Christmas Eve he is visited by the ghost of Marley, his dead business partner. Marley foretells that Scrooge will be visited by three spirits, each of whom will attempt to show Scrooge the error of his ways. Will Scrooge reform his ways in time to celebrate Christmas?

Keywords: 1840s, 19th-century, based-on-novel, christmas, compassion, ghost, holiday, miser, redemption, spirit
Genres: Drama, Fantasy,
Taglines: In Just One Night, He Has Seen His Past, His Present, And His Future... And They've All Come Back To Haunt Him.

Quotes:

[first lines]::Clergyman: A man that is born of woman hath but a short time to live and is full of misery. He cometh up and is cut down like a flower.

[last lines]::Tiny Tim: God bless us, every one!

Bob Cratchit: I was wondering if you'd like Mr. Marley's name removed from the sign outside.::Mr. Ebenezer Scrooge: No; time will erase it at no cost to us.

[Scrooge appears at Fred's table, and clears his throat. Everyone turns and stares at him in amazement]::Mr. Ebenezer Scrooge: Fred? I-It's I. It's your Uncle Scrooge. I've come to dinner... will you have me, Fred?::Fred: [rising] Bless my soul! Have you? Of course we'll have you!::[he pumps his uncle's hand, but Scrooge waves him off and goes to Emily]::Mr. Ebenezer Scrooge: And you, my dear? Can you forgive a stupid old man who doesn't want to be left out in the cold anymore? Will you take me in?::[silence]::Emily: Oh... Merry Christmas, Uncle!

Mr. Ebenezer Scrooge: You find my nephew amusing, Cratchit.::Bob Cratchit: He's a very pleasant fellow, sir.::Mr. Ebenezer Scrooge: You're another Christmas lunatic like him.::Bob Cratchit: If you say so, sir.::Mr. Ebenezer Scrooge: Oh, it seems you doubt me, Mr. Cratchit. What are you, then?::Bob Cratchit: Your clerk, Mr. Scrooge.::Mr. Ebenezer Scrooge: My fifteen shilling a week clerk, with a wife and family, yet you babble about "Merry Christmas." I'll retire to Bedlam.

Mr. Ebenezer Scrooge: Is there no chance that boy will be spared?::The Ghost of Christmas Present: Not if the future remains unaltered. But so what if he dies? If he's going to do it he'd better do it quick and decrease the surplus population. If you be a man in your heart forbear that wicked cant until you've discovered what the surplus really is and where it is. Will you decided what men shall live, what men shall die? It may be that in the sight of Heaven you are more worthless and less fit to live than millions, like this poor man's child. Oh God, to hear the insect on the leaf pronouncing there is too much life among his hungry brothers in the dust!

Mrs. Cratchit: [talking about Scrooge and Christmas] He'll be about as merry as a graveyard on a wet Sunday. [the Ghost of Christmas Present bursts into laughter]

A Christmas Carol at Ford's Theatre (1979)

Actors: Thomas Dillon (actor), Thomas Dillon (actor), Thomas Dillon (actor), Geoff Garland (actor), Geoff Garland (actor), David Long (actor), David Long (actor), David Long (actor), David Long (actor), David Long (actor), Paul Milikin (actor), Paul Milikin (actor), Paul Milikin (actor), Paul Milikin (actor), Ronald Bishop (actor),

Genres: Drama,