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honestly, out of all the games that might have patch notes reading “fixed a Geneva convention violation”, Stardew Valley was not one I expected.
Lol?!?
This far from the first game to do so. This specific Geneva Conventions violation is so common in video games the Red Cross itself has had to tell the industry to knock it off.
My favorite part of it all is that it makes “Neopets violated the Geneva Conventions in the early 2000s” a completely true sentence.
(via revanchistsuperstar)
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How about I seduce the goblin with my shaved 6-pack
-A werewolf named Chad
how… what is… did you just have this art lying around?? was it in a box labeled In Case Of Goblin Seduction 6-Pack Joke Break Glass? apparently this is a Magic card and I have a lot of questions for Magic: The Gathering right now
I can never remember this card’s real name because everyone just calls it “Abs of Treason”
The card name is “Enthralling Victor”. It has a ‘spiritual sequel’ card in terms of artwork called “Captivating Crew”, drawn by the same artist:
Abs of treason
goblins captivated by abs is my favourite genre of art
(via absentlyabbie)
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sjdsjkdlskdas-deactivated202012:
sjdsjkdlskdas-deactivated202012:
never have i been so overcome with affection for a stranger as i have with the king’s hand guy from twitter
i’d die for you king’s hand guy
There’s a part 2
(via justnoticetheuniverse)
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out of the shower wet is like a different wet. dry in 5 minutes. ocean wet lasts 20 minutes and if you get bath wet you’re wet for like an extra hour
so i bought stronger weed last night
(via justnoticetheuniverse)
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you know what’s really genuinely unsettling? the degree to which men fucking do not want to sympathize with/be interested in women.
male audiences will happily watch a dozen superhero shows, but then something like Agent Carter or Supergirl turn up and they’re panned from the first trailer and have to struggle for ratings. male audiences will watch countless installments of a franchise as long as it’s about men doing man things but the second a character like Rey or Furiosa or god forbid four entire female Ghostbusters steps up and takes a position of prominence it’s “pandering sjw bullshit”.
it’s not pandering. men just aggressively don’t want to have to be invested in a woman’s narrative and it’s really gross.
anyway re: everyone telling me to “Stop making this a gender thing” or some variation on that
this isn’t like… an opinion I’m pulling out of my ass here? this starts where earlier than tv shows and hollywood blockbusters, when all the kids in a class are reading Harry Potter or Percy Jackson or Eragon o Lord of the Rings or Maze Runner or whatever the hip book is right now. the books like that, the ones that become popular reading, are overwhelmingly about male leads, because male is still considered the default.
there’s a split in YA literature, between books that are “for everyone” and “for girls”, and that’s honestly the entire issue in a tiny little box right there. stories about men are supposed to be accessible for everyone, but stories about girls are seen as 1.) inherently for women and 2.) something that only women will care about.
men grow up in a society that doesn’t make them go out of their way to get into the heads of women and empathize with then. historically it’s been very easy for men to not engage with female-led media if they don’t want to, whereas (like someone else commented on this post) girls and women have had very little choice in the past because everything was about men. we didn’t even question it.
and now the women are arriving in mainstream media in ways that say they’re important and they matter and
small (or sometimes not so small) but loud-enough-to-be-acknowledged groups of men lose. their. shit.
because they think there’s something inherently Not For Them about a woman’s story, and they never learned how to deal with it.
(also once again, because LOT of ya’ll don’t seem to get this here: I’m trying to talk about knee-jerk reactions to female-centered works - often before they even come out. not whether or not you personally thought [x show or movie] was good. ya feel?)
i don’t think i’ve ever read a single post that i’ve agreed with so totally and so immediately and here’s why:
i love books, right? and from the ages of about 11-15 i was insanely invested in teenage/ya fantasy and sci-fi. harry potter, percy jackson, all of the books op listed above- and one of the things that made those books so great was that you could have a conversation about them with anyone! a lot of the guys in my class also loved this type of genre and i’d often talk about books with them (even my own brother has read all of the books listed above) we’d have long, interesting conversations about these books and it was great.
but then i’d mention something about the hunger games, or the divergent series, or uglies, the raven cycle, mara dyer, the mortal instruments, the selection, etc. and the response would always be the same: either ‘i haven’t read it’ or ‘i couldn’t get into it’ or ‘it doesn’t seem like my type of thing’
even outside of the ya genre, looking at something like contemporary fiction or whatever- do you know how many guys will talk endlessly about the great gatsby or catcher in the rye or any other male-centric novel? but when you bring up something as influential as pride and prejudice or jane eyre or practically /anything/ written by/focused around a woman- you get the same responses as before
society has made it so that women have no choice whether to engage with male-centric stories or not: from children, a big portion of the media we consume focuses on the male perspective and like,,, that’s not necessarily a bad thing /in itself/- the bad thing is that it doesn’t work both ways and it’s not an even split. whereas young girls are surrounded by and expected to empathise with films/books/media concerning men, it’s not the same for young boys: they have narratives that either focus entirely or largely around them.
women have no trouble consuming media that focuses on a male narrative because it’s been labelled as the default, the ‘normal’- whereas men struggle to watch/read anything that doesn’t focus around them because they’ve never /had/ to.
(via justnoticetheuniverse)
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English to become the official European language
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as “Euro-English”.
In the first year, “s” will replace the soft “c”. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard “c” will be dropped in favour of “k”. This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome “ph” will be replaced with “f”. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent “e” in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing “th” with “z” and “w” with “v”.
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary “o” kan be dropd from vords kontaining “ou” and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensi bl riten styl.
Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi TU understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.
I saw a version of this joke like 20 years ago as an email forward and it’s always been in the back of my brain. This is a goddamn fossil.
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(via caffeinatedcripple)
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i was curious what the other side of the moon looked like so i googled it and
i’m so glad we got the side we did the moon’s ass ugly
You’re so rude to Miss Moon the reason her ass is so fucked up is cuz she’s protecting us from meteors. Her face is beautiful so her ass can be disgusting and we can be safe.
(via moirasroseswigs)
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I keep using my girlfriend with unusual work hours to get out of coworker interactions and happy hours and hanging out.
But now the company holiday party is upon us.
And I’ve been lying about the girlfriend.
I suddenly really empathise with the characters in Hallmark Christmas movies.
I like that people have two reactions to this post.
Reasonable: “just say she couldn’t make it!”
Chaotic: FAKE DATING AU
Well, which one is it going to be?
And so it begins
having the DMV area Craigslist bookmarked has never come in handy before but now
Update, Craigslist has flagged my post as inappropriate.
Apparently you can’t solicit a date as a “gig”
I now see my mistake
Update: a date has been acquired. This is true lesbian solidarity in action.
My wife has now read this and wonders how baby gays are even meeting and mating
Can confirm I am meeting and mating just fine 😂
By the way I’m in a relationship with this woman now
This is the feedback I’ve been looking for
(via moirasroseswigs)
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In 29 days Biden has deported 905 people per day on average. He’s reopened facilities to hold children in cages that had been closed for months. No stimulus at all yet, no covid response at all aside from reopen schools and vaccines will be available to the general public by June maybe. $1,400 checks maybe someday instead of the $2,000 we were promised. Me Too is pretty much dead. Kamala Harris said she believed Tara Reade’s allegations and called Biden a racist straight to his face on live national television and then agreed to be Biden’s VP anyways. Any hope of police abolition or even just reform has been completely killed after nationwide months long protests since Biden met with civil rights leaders and basically told them “defund the police” was hurting democrats election chances. He’s been more effective in 29 days at crushing progressive demands than Trump was in 4 years but he’s not orange I guess.
For the liberals in the notes calling me a faux progressive who’s doing white supremacists work for them please stop making excuses for Biden’s immigration policy he’s currently on track to deport 100,000 more people than Trump did in his first year and y'all keep blaming the Texas AG and this federal judge and yeah they are right wing scum to be sure but they aren’t actually forcing Biden to do this its almost like he is living up to his campaign promise that nothing will fundamentally change
(via moirasroseswigs)
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peak fucking animal character design is just a vaguely animal shaped thing with 2 round eyes. no need to make it complicated. that’s it right there.
that’s what i’m fuckin talking about
(via moirasroseswigs)
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gonna need a minute to visualize this joke i can’t screw it up
donkey comes out as nonbinary, announces he/her pronouns
(via moirasroseswigs)
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gays dress like everyone from Jurassic Park tbh
Fair point
Not even sure if these are types of gay, but here we are
You forgot the T. Rex
Omg you’re right, I forgot the T-Rex!!!
The dinosaur is an amazing punchline but Dennis Nedry not making it on this post is pure ‘Hawaiian Shirt Gay’ erasure.
So we’re all just sleeping on Muldoon’s outdoorsy gay look? Look at how outrageous his fucking socks are, I implore you.
(via moirasroseswigs)
