Jandek ‎– "Aarhus Sunday" (Corwood Industries ‎– CORWOOD 0842) 2020

He gets around a bit these days does Jandek.

Here he produces a drifting, shimmeringly wobbly, set joined by fellow non-musician, Phil Todd, of Ashtray Navigations/Betley Welcomes Careful Drivers non-fame. As Phil has the same lack of conventional musical ability as the star of this evenings performance,the set rarely attains an cohesiveness at all. Like a breeze among the leaves of the Singing Ringing Tree blown by an evil dwarf,plus some atonal fairy dust heavily sprinkled by the 'Nerve Ending Fairy'.(sorry,there wasn't a proper clip on you tube i'm astonished to announce!?)

If the sound of limp appendages randomly stroking the strings of a guitar and the keys of a piano in a light breeze is your idea of fun then this is the 'Pet Sounds' of Outsider music.

Tracklist:

1-1 Your Scarf In Denmark 16:25
1-2 Gift Of Love 11:14
1-3 The Lady Wears The Jewels 13:55
1-4 All The Shadows That Be 13:00
2-1 Little Bit Crazy 10:06
2-2 Where You Want Me 15:19
2-3 I Still Have You 10:19
2-4 Why Not Here 9:40

DOWNLOAD from aarhus to your house HERE!

Jandek ‎– "Amsterdam Saturday" (Corwood Industries ‎– CORWOOD 0841) 2020

 A more traditional sounding 'Electric Jandek' performance on this one.At the venue of legends,the Paradiso. Slightly 'Bootleggy' in its sonic fidelity,which suits Jandek perfectly.

Here he's joined by Phil Todd of Betly Welcomes Careful Drivers and Ashtray Navigations fame on Bass and Distortion pedal(?).

All the songs,pieces,tracks sound like the same songs,pieces, tracks, as this meandering trio search for that missing note.

He also did a gig in Rotterdam which was attended by our erstwhile Indonesian correspondant Henk Madrotter, and videoed......which you can check out here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_-Gos4pDyo0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ca8iqTNhyB8

If only the occupying Nazi's had Jandek to play through their Tannoy system in Amsterdam during the 40's.....Anne Frank would have come out with her hands up ready for Auchwitz.Either that or someone in the know would have shouted "She's in the Attic.....just stop playing that god awful racket!"

Tracklist:

1 The Sentence 10:59
2 Am I Dreaming 10:58
3 Crowding The Couches 4:44
4 King Of The Knight 6:07
5 Memphis Ticket 10:06
6 I Stalked The World 6:07

DOWNLOAD some horrible moaning noises from jandek's two lips from amsterdam HERE!

Thee Electrocutionists ‎– "Sorry: Not In Service" (Union Pole ‎– UP57) 1995

Another project that featured Phil Todd of Ashtray Navigations was Thee Electrocutionists. The sound is yer usual trademark effect laden fuzzy noise encrusted dark ambient fog, and the cover seems to predict the London Bombings of 2007. Although I do rember an IRA bomb doing the same in London, when an Irish Terrorist/freedom fighter was transporting a bomb which prematurely exploded, killing the idiot,and injuring a few passengers in the process.
I was, once upon a time, witness to the last IRA bomb on the mainland, a deadly Bicycle bomb!? Not quite as laughable as the underpants bomber,but laughable all the same.This lethal bike was spotted, casually chained to the railings on Brighton Pier! Why those vicious religiously extreme marxists. The bomb squad effected a controlled explosion while we all watched from the pub, and cheered when it went 'POP'!
The worst part of the evening was, whilst asleep in the hotel, the fire alarm went off, so we all thought it was the proper bomb this time and rushed to get our clothes on to escape this evil. Turned out that some twat was smoking in his room and set the smoke detector off!!!

Tracklisting:

A Untitled (13:45)
B Untitled (11:22)

DOWNLOAD as we are still in sevice HERE!

Kneale/Campbell/Todd ‎– "British Steel" (Celebrate Psi Phenomenon ) 2003

By some strange coincidence, the UK Neil Campbell's mirror image from the other side of the planet is New Zealands Campbell Kneale of The Birchville Cat Motel . So naturally, they're gonna collaborate aren't they? Throw in Ashtray Navigations Phil Todd to keep the two Neils, or Kneales, apart to prevent them from cancelling each other out, and we have a noise super groop to end all sooper groops......yes even eclipsing Blind Faith.
In the world of particle physics, or even supernatural German mythology, one should never meet ones Doppleganger, or anti-particle, or you face the danger of the stronger self taking your place, or your anti-matter self cancelling you out to leave ........nothing.
I don't know wether this happened on these nights in Leeds in 2003, but the evidence that something creative occured rather than anything destructive is here to...er...hear?. I suppose, if you make a recording of yourself to prove that you existed, then the power of the Doppleganger would be negated? Can't say the same for Matter/Anti-matter scenarios, as the recording becomes a space/time event rather than proof that something will exist in future time.In fact its difficult to prove that future time will exist at all. This is, however, proof that we all definitely exist in the present.So while one plays these drones,the sound may change, but its only evolving in the moment......the next moment we may not even be alive to hear it.......so get listening to some 'British Steel', preferably not the album by Judas Priest, but this one with the two Neil Campbells on it, before its too late. Not that the concept of 'Lateness' exists in the space time continum,but you know what I mean, because I certainly fucking don't!

Tracklisting:
1 Untitled 15:56
2 Untitled 28:13
3 Untitled 18:45

DOWNLOAD<>DAOLNWOD HERE!

Dogliveroil ‎– "Amp Tamper Rampant Pecker" (Union Pole ‎– UP37) 1996

What was the worst most intense pain I ever had in my sad little life? Was it my Kidney Stones?...Nah!....My broken ribs and collapsed Lung....Nah!......yup, you guessed it, it was Toothache at the weekend when no dentist was available, and the drugs from the Pharmacy weren't strong enough.Basically the only thing that could have worked would have been morphine,and me being straight edge would have no access to illegal suppies of such a substance...unlike you lot I guess?
It was around the time of the second Gulf war, the Shock'n'Awe thing.During my sleepless stupor i could take my mind off the arcing electric cable in my dying tooth by watching some live war on the 24 hour news feed.Unbeliveable. The seige of Basra by the British Army was live throughout the night......this doesn't happen anymore.Its bad for morale and lessens support for illegal wars,and no government wants that do they?
Dogliveroil...er..did I say Phil Todd of Ashtray Navigations is in this fab combo?.....manage to capture the sheer hell of toothache very accurately in two 15 minute parts. This is the sound of having nowhere to hide from unstoppable pain.
Don't forget to brush your teeth kids.

The classic Ren and Stimpy Cartoon 'Rens Toothache' kinda sums up both the experience of listening to Dogliveroil, and my Toofache episode very adequately....click here to experience this landmark piece of television... hopefully?

Its new Dog(liveroil).... from Blammo!
.....yeah ok, i'm a shameless Ren and Stimpy fan,frankly the best thing ever made for television.

Tracklisting:

A Toothache Comes In Spring Part One 14:57
B Toothache Comes In Spring Part Two 14:39

DOWNLOAD some health destroying oil in appropriately super low resolution HERE!

Ashtray Navigations ‎– "The Black Clock" (Matching Head ‎– Matching Head 44) 1996

A black clock is alright as long you've got alternatively coloured hands, white for example.Unless the Black Clock is a metaphor for the inexorable tick-tocking of the countdown to ones inevitable demise. In which case this dark ambient, glitchy, smear of a recording would be the soundtrack. The difference being the Black Clock runs backwards,but cassette players normally only play forwards.An interesting juxtaposition yes? Therefore each should theoretically cancel the other out, and time will stand still.We will escape death but be forever stuck in a limbo of our own creation.....and bored shitless!
But, at least we could listen to this Ashtray Navigations tape for eternity. Its good, but even an eternity of listening to something good, great even, would have the most bulletproof constitution screaming out for Aquas "Barbie Girl" (a terrible number one hit from the nineties that thought it was being 'ironic')."Com'on Barbie, Let's Go party"!? If these scandinavians were actually warbling about Klaus Barbie, the 'Butcher of Lyon', rather than the kitch childrens dolly and gay icon,then this would be a supreme example of the art of Irony. Leaving the notion of Partying with a Nazi war criminal very much to the darker side of ones imagination. Maybe this is the description of Hell that the Bible failed to include, if so i'm gonna start praying and grovelling for redemption from any God that will listen.

Tracklisting:

1. Black Clock part 1 (22:38)
2. Black Clock part 2 (22:21)

DOWNLOAD a clock that is black HERE!

Ashtray Navigations ‎– "Drain'd" (Betley Welcomes Careful Drivers) 1996

Another one of those microphone without wind shield in a gale noise cop outs. We've all done it, and thought we were very clever didn't we? This was Ashtray Navigations attempt at being clever.
There's only so many time one can listen to frying circuitry, and I passed my quota a looooong time ago.
But, there'll be someone out there who will dig this crazy single sided cassette fuzz-out as if it was the first time again.I suppose Noise is a bit like Sex I guess?

Tracklisting:

1. Drain'd (46:21)

DOWNLOAD from the drainage system of world culture HERE!

Ashtray Navigations ‎– "Bicycle Glue Blues" (E.F. Tapes ‎– Echo Fixation #11) 1994

As i'm getting a bit bored with posting minimal synth albums, maybe its time to go into the chill out area and absorb some strange noise.......from the 'Nineties'!!!???
Yes, Color Disc wasn't the only means of escape from the mind mushing beat of Club culture and the bowel-flushing absurdity of Britpop in the UK. Look hard enough and there were a hardcore of creative non- musicians who probably didn't even realise that the world had moved on. Just like back in 1977 when the Prog groups returned from the padded cell of the United States of Awful, to discover that they were now roundly hated. However, in my school there was always a clique who still donned denim jackets, shoulder length hair, with Genesis written in biro on their adidas bags.......I now envy them. Like most Punks, I was always a secret Progger, and was secretly relieved when Rotten came out as a Van Der Graaf Generator fan, and Howard Devoto's new group was basically Progressive Rock with sneery vocals.
The same happened in the mid-Nineties, as one was deeply interested in Jungle and Drum'n'Bass, but in the chill out room, one could rediscover Krautrock , Italian Prog, and Van Der Graaf again. Never really looked back from there. These were traditional 'No-Go' areas for a long time.
While Oasis and Blur (Whoops,I'll admit to seeing Blur in a packed pub in Leicester....missed Oasis at the same venue thankfully,-only five people there apparently?), were making themselves out to be another new Beatles and Kinks, Phil Todd from Cheshire, was creating a world of his own on his "Betley Welcomes careful Drivers" cassette label. Like a Gary Ramon of the nineties,except the emphasis was more on the noisey rather than melodic, or pop, avenue.
This early cassette, is a demonstration of how to make a recording with no musical ability or technique whatsoever. Just get a load of cheapo instruments and budget effects,twist knobs press go, and just do it.A lazy way to explain this music is "Experimental"....other people, the normals...the ones who like Blur and Oasis, would describe it equally lazily as "Crap".....one begs to differ.

DOWNLOAD this bicycle repair kit addiction HERE!